Marching to the Beat of a Different Drummer

Transgender veterans Really know that feeling.
I was recently reminded vividly of how fortunate I am to be able to write here in Cyrsti's Condo of my experiences as a trans veteran and more precisely how the process works for me in my interactions with the Veterans Administration.

Perhaps you remember the much maligned "shake up" at Outserve-SLDN and the "resignation" of it's Executive Director Allyson Robinson who just happens to be a transgender woman and a graduate of West Point. The post was called I Joined and mentioned a new group called Spart*a which was forming for TGLB service members and vets.

Allyson Robinson

My dose of reality came when I joined and visited the Spart*a Facebook page. Within approximately six hours I received a confirmation message and a pledge of secrecy. I'm sort of naive now that I have been out as far as I have for a while and I thought "Whoa Dummy" organizations such as Spart*a represent what is transgender reality in the U.S. military establishment. Careers are at stake here.

Jumping back to Allyson Robinson, I'm passing along a link to a very enlightening post called Lunch With Allyson Robinson here.

I Joined

Here in Cyrsti's Condo, I always try to keep a close eye on any and all transgender veteran news I can find because most of you know I am a trans vet.

I did choose to stay out of the seemingly crazy story
of the requested resignation of OutServe-SLDN's newly appointed executive director, transgender Army veteran Allyson Robinson. (right)  Many more high-profile resignations followed in protest of Robinson's treatment.

Following this mess,  a recent press release  announced the formation of Service Members, Partners, Allies for Respect and Tolerance for All, or SPΛRT*A, a "group of LGBT people and allies who are currently serving or have served in the military, and our families," that is "especially committed to our Trans members… and to gaining full equality for them in the U.S. Armed Forces.

SPART*A's Facebook page is currently active, while a website for the fledgling group is still under construction.

One can only hope this group can gain traction and effect change against a huge obstacle - the U.S. Military. Follow the link above for more info!

A "Loss" in Chile

Valentina Verbal campaigned to make history as Chile’s first transgender congresswoman. Had she won, Chile’s LGBT community would have representation in the national Congress before most other countries around the world. Verbal learned that she would have to run under her legal male name or pull out of the race. Verbal decided to step down. From the Global Voices site.


"The transgender woman ran for office having applied for — but without having secured — a legal name change. Verbal – who was born a man, but said she always felt like a woman — prefers to keep her birth name a secret. She said that the name not only misidentifies her, but has tangled her identity since childhood. “I thought, perhaps naively, that given the vacuum of electoral laws, and filling in that space with the anti-discrimination law, there wouldn’t be trouble getting what I asked,” she said. Verbal explained that voters wouldn’t recognize her birth name on the ballot. The campaign would be a wash with her having been in politics for years as Valentina Verbal. She belongs to Chile’s center-right National Renewal Party (RN) and spent the past years fighting for an anti-discrimination law."

Hopefully in the future Valentina will get the name problem straightened out and push Chile ahead in TGLB reform. Follow the link  above for more!

Much To Do - About Quite A Lot

Quite a week. Last night I attended the second of two hometown Equality meetings.

As I have written here in Cyrsti's Condo, this week I stepped from the shadows of my local stealth. Bottom line is, I have lived stealth in my home town for the last several years as I set out to build a whole new life in nearby larger cities. Nothing earth shattering about that but as my feminine life evolved into HRT and beyond- the more I walked the trans woman path the more I detested remnants of my former life in the shadows.

None of that mattered though as meeting time approached. Again I was suffering my usual amount of trepidation- for two reasons. Number one... I'm relatively certain the number of years I have dealt with the inner turmoil of gender dysphoria has left me scarred to a point I will go to the grave with it. In essence a deep fear of public rejection.  Number two... I have a deep inherent shyness around strangers which I have learned to cover fairly well but I have a tendency to come off as a real bitch. Luckily though I'm also a good actress in the sense the more nervous I become, the bigger my tendency is to chatter. A remnant from too many crummy business meetings over the years.

The good news is, as it turned out all my fear was a waste of energy.  I seriously can't remember a group of people going out of their way to make me feel welcome. As with most of my ventures, I was again the "token trans girl" in the room but it was cool. As I tried to tell them, I wanted and needed to bring a transgender view to the group. To "unsilence" the "T" in LGBT.

They were lucky! Last night, I was fairly quiet as my mind raced to interface my thoughts with their very active agenda-knowing full well I can make some sort of an impact-over a space of time.

So all in all, this week was another wonderful attempt to connect the dots in my life. Plus,  I finally feel better about "walking my talk".  I have to tell you I found the experience to be wonderfully liberating!

Thanks, to the Equality Springfield Ohio folks for helping it happen!

Who Wrote "Hypocrite" on my Mirror?

I received two quick responses (thank you!) on my "Wedgie" Cyrsti's Condo post this morning.  One is just plain truth and one led me to think I'm not so keen with the written word on occasion. The first is from Alexis:

"Hey, I wish you best wishes as you begin to step out in public. It is a difficult thing to do, especially if you do it right in front of all those who have known you as your maleness. When I did that, I found that what others had told me---not everyone will be gracious and accepting of this transition. Though I suffered no physical hurt, the number of friends and family who suddenly began ignoring me like I no longer existed still bothers me today. So, again,good fortunes on your road ahead. I know I did what I simply had to do, and I have never regretted doing it for a single moment......alexis"

You are so correct in everything you said! In this post I tended to think everyone was a mind reader and  I neglected to fill in much needed info.  Such as I live a huge percentage of my life out- as a trans woman with a group of friends who have never met what is left of my male self. But not in the town where I live.  More and more I began to feel I was a bigger and bigger hypocrite and I hate that. It is time in my life to do more than nothing about the situation where I live. Just sitting back in bigger cities around me and saying...yes it does suck in my town just isn't good enough anymore! Thanks so much Alexis!!!!

Sharon added:

"There is more condemning in the bible for those that get a divorce or playing around with more then their intended mate then there is for being a gay person"

Kind of funny how that works...right Sharon?  But speaking of the righty bible bitches...one of the methods they are trying is to drive a wedge between the TGLB community and the traditional Civil Rights community of color...divide and conquer.  The work of a true Christian? "Me thinks" not!

Thanks Sharon