Melonee Malone

Another wonderful dare I say sexy picture from one of my Facebook acquaintances Melonee Malone.

I don't think she is any relation to Connie Malone. Connie lives in Seattle and Melonee in Wisconsin. One thing is for sure though, those Malone girls have good transgender genes!

Are You a Pioneer...or Just Old?

As I have mentioned before here in Cyrsti's Condo, one of the pleasant surprises coming from this years' Trans Ohio Symposium was the influence of transgender history. And yes, my age made me all of a sudden relevant again. My experiences with many of the younger transgender women and men I had met had led me to feel otherwise. So it was good to feel accepted again.

Surely though, even with the current setbacks from the Liar in Chief in the White House, our present has changed considerably. Check out this comment from Connie which came from my Grand daughter's highly androgynous Prom outfit which basically was a tuxedo with heels:

"Well, there you go! Give yourself some credit for raising an accepting daughter, as well as finally being your true self - which has certainly served to break down some of the barriers that used to stifle gender expression. Although I don't see myself as a pioneer or hero within the trans community, I do take solace in the fact that living completely as the woman I was born to be has led to more acceptance by most of the people with whom I've had contact. It's the same for you, I'm sure. Oh, but such changes we've seen over the past seventy years or so!"

Thanks for the compliment! Needless to say, I am so proud of her! :)

 Of course, advances in the LGBT culture are more likely to occur in more liberal areas of the country than others. For example, I live in a fairly liberal suburb of Cincinnati but if you travel a mere ten miles or so East of us attitudes definitely change. 

On a bigger scale, if you live in an area such as Seattle where Connie lives is decidedly more liberal for transgender individuals than say, Arkansas where trans minister Elijah Walker

Elijah Walker

is trying to make a difference. check out the story here. Thanks to Bobbie for sharing.

Saturday Night

We did end up going out last night for a special dinner for a visitor from Oregon. Jennifer (the visitor was delightful). We ended up sitting right across from her in the group of twelve. I asked her if she knew Connie in Seattle :).

The gathering included Liz and I, one transgender guy and nine other transgender and/or cross dressers there. Oh, and I forgot, one lesbian. Subtract one of the cross dressers to keep the math straight. (No pun intended.)

A good time was had by all beginning with a neighboring table buying us two bottles of wine before one of them left. Maybe he was a closeted cross dresser himself? At any rate, he set the wine drinkers at the table up for success.

In addition, to our table, the staff of the restaurant was very nice and some of us are bordering on becoming regulars. It is still relatively chilly around here, so I wore one of my usual sweater/leggings outfits.

After dinner, we came home and most of the other attendees went to an Irish Pub to enjoy a bit of St. Patrick's  Day festivities.

Oh, to be young again!

Always on Stage

It shouldn't come to anyone in particular as a surprise,  when you cross the gender frontier and enter the feminine world, you are always on stage.

For example, today I went Liz's martial arts class and then to our usually busy grocery store. Today wasn't too bad though because we weren't dealing with a snow storm like Connie is in Seattle. Hopefully she stayed home and won't be catching any fish at the fish market. I hear it's tough on acrylic nails!

At any rate, as I waited for Liz's class to end, a woman came in with her child for the next class. Along the way, she struck up a conversation about what all the different color uniforms meant. As we exchanged pleasantries, I don't know if she ever realized she was talking to a transgender woman, or even cared. As we chatted, I was glad though I put a little extra effort into my makeup.

A little later, at the grocery store, I was happy too when a product representative asked to take a picture of us when we stopped to sample a fresh pasta product. I almost said only if I could get a copy for my blog.

When I got home and started to relax with our usual PBS cooking shows (Public Broadcasting), I began to realize one again how women are always on some sort of stage. Plus, as transgender women we have to work twice as hard to close the looks gap with cis women. I am so envious on occasion when I see a cute cis woman in her leggings, loose sweater and baseball cap.

I guess I must be doing something right though when Liz makes gentle fun of me for taking too long getting ready to go.

Seattle

Our Cyrsti's Condo post concerning places to live when you are transgender, elicited several responses about the City of Seattle:

1. FABULOUSCONNIEDEESeptember 15, 2018 at 3:39 PM

   "I suppose I might have it easier here in Seattle, but it only takes one hater to ruin a day. They are out there, and it's true that some of them may feel more emboldened due to the demeanor of the current president and administration. It really wasn't that long ago (ten years) that I was still hiding myself for fear of anyone seeing who I thought was the "real me". As we spoke of on an earlier post, getting one's own house in order should be first on the list. No matter where you may live, if you don't show your self-confidence, along with a sincere effort to blend in, you are setting yourself up for a possibly terrible experience. The bullies are drawn to signs of weakness. Developing a thicker skin is also helpful, but I wouldn't depend on it as defense against physical assault.
   
   I have been accosted a number of times, and assaulted once. There have been a few "Me Too" incidents, as well. Everything physical happened in drinking establishments when I was alone, so I take care not to put myself in those situations anymore. At least my self-confidence and self-esteem have risen to the point where I don't run back to the closet in tears when something negative happens. I refuse to allow my gender identity, or someone else's perception of it, to make me a victim. No matter how bad the world may look, having a victim mentality only makes it worse.
   
   I have my pride, I won't abide!"
2. Great advice! Thanks :)
3. 
   Emma GraySeptember 15, 2018 at 11:22 PM

   "I moved from the SF Bay Area (where I was born, raised, schooled, and worked) to Seattle just over a year ago. Maybe my opinion is biased by the wonderful change in scenery but, in my opinion, Seattle and environs are a transgender Mecca. I love it here."
4. Thanks to you too Emma!

You Can't Change at the YMCA?

Via Connie, the story of a Tacoma,Washington YMCA is now caving to pressure and changing it's stance on transgender use of it's changing rooms:

On the heels of a new "bathroom bill" in Wisconsin and just days after bathroom usage became an issue for one transgender student in Missouri, a YMCA near Seattle is embroiled in its own bathroom battle.

"The Y in Tacoma, Wash., attempted to make its bathroom policies more accommodating to transgender individuals, reported Seattle TV station KOMO. But the facility encountered a backlash from members, what the station called "a flood of phone calls, emails and social media postings."

So the YMCA recinded its new policy, which would have allowed transgender members to use the locker room of their choice. 

Those in charge of the athletic facility gave KOMO this explanation for the policy change: "a non-transgender individual might pose as a transgender [sic] to gain access to our locker rooms and expose themselves to children and cause harm to children." 

"We are asking that our transgender members use our private changing room at our family facilities," YMCA spokesperson Michelle LaRue told KOMO."

Trans sunset over Cincinnati

Of course we know: " studies have found that transgender people are much more likely to be the targets of harassment and violence when using gender-segregated spaces like restrooms or locker rooms, rather than the perpetrators of such crimes. In fact, there has never been a verified instancereported of someone "pretending" to be transgender to enter gender-segregated spaces and cause harm to cisgender individuals.

Nevertheless, the false assumption that transgender people are deceiptful and have nefarious motives behind their desire to exercise basic human bodily functions persists, and continues to give rise to misguided policies and legislation that isolates and stigmatizes transgender people. "

Thanks Connie and you all can follow the link for more!