Party Down Witches

Before Covid and continuing to the present, various organizations have hosted "Witches Balls" around Cincinnati, Ohio. Back in the pre pandemic days I was fortunate enough to have had a really good time at several of the parties. Most of the parties contained various mixes of people in costume, belly dancers and pirates. Along the way I managed to dress sexy for one of the big witches ball and even was hit on by one of the pirates. I don't know if it was a combination of what he was drinking or the low lights in the venue which worked to disguise my true gender to him. But either way I was flattered because I was more than a little drunk at the time also.

First Witches Ball with Liz
High Heels and all.

A year later I was actually able to work on the committee putting the event together. They all knew I was a transgender woman and welcomed the help I provided. I couldn't do much because I needed to sit down quickly most of the time. So the two "most mature" individuals in the group were assigned to a table

Second Witches Ball with Tom
On the left.

selling items which benefitted the coven putting on the ball. It wasn't as much fun as I had in the past but at least the sitting down didn't put a strain on my sore back.

As far as gender recognition went, I was striving for more of a more authentic witch look more than any sort of sexy costumed appearance. By this time, I had transitioned away from the need to try to be sexy into a more appropriate well dressed woman. Hoping to blend into the crowded venue more easily. 

I can't tell you I had more fun but deep down I realized I was changing from needing Halloween to being such a major event for me.  One thing was for certain, my feet were more comfortable after I relaxed my "costume" requirements and started to wear flats to the venue. You can't see what I was wearing from the waist down in the second picture but I chose soft flowing legged pants along with my black flats. 

I still have one final fairly dramatic Halloween post which I have been saving for the end. In the meantime, the Witches Balls I attended played a major role in me transitioning from being a cross dresser into my authentic life as a transgender woman.

       

Transgender Halloween

My Halloween is coming up tonight. It's finally here after a years worth of planning...the Cincinnati Witches Ball.

I am wearing a modified witches costume. Made up of a long layered flowing dress and a glittery witches hat. Not really a radical costume idea but then again, it fits the theme.

Every year at this time, I think back on all the bittersweet Halloweens I had during my cross dressing days. Sweet because I was able to spend at least one precious evening (a year) cross dressed as a girl and bitter because it ended so soon.

I did all of the usual sleezy costume ideas but later on always migrated to costumes which hopefully helped me to look like what a real woman would wear. I would hope other party goers would mistake me for a woman. Which did actually happen a few times.

For some reason though, the whole process just frustrated me more.  Instead of following up on the idea of blending when I cross dressed, I had a tendency to over do it. I became the cross dresser in the mall stuffed into a mini shirt and heels.

Fast forwarding to the present, Halloween for me has become a time to look for possible cross dressers and their costumes. Much of the fun is gone too, because I actually have a job to do at the party.

I guess the true scary meaning of Halloween for me was always replaced by the pressure of choosing a feminine costume and having the courage to wear it.

As the actual Halloween date comes closer, I will post a few of my past experiences!

Transgender Acceptance

Sunday was a very busy day, with many different errands to run and people to see.

It was a beautiful sunny fall day, perfect weather for leggings and my powder blue light sweater. Plus, for once in a very long time, I felt healthy with no aches or pains in my foot. Naturally, it made walking so much easier and I did a lot of it.

Before we left, I had a chance to see CBS News Sunday Morning show on the television. One of the show's features was a revisiting of a show five years ago with several transgender kids. It was very well done and I have added a link here if you haven't seen it. I would check it quickly before it goes away.

Then,we started the day by going to a large game/restaurant venue to pick up what turned out to be a very generous donation to this years Cincinnati Witches Ball. The place had just opened so there were very few people around to notice or be noticed.

From there, we headed back across town to attend a memorial for a dear friend who passed recently. His sister was holding the memorial for his partner in a local tea/coffee shop. As Liz headed for the rest room, I was left to negotiate the ordering process. Since I am not really a tea drinker, I opted for a dark roast coffee and ordered Liz her tea. In the midst of a very busy venue, I received extra ordinarily good service I thought and most of it came because I am transgender. We were asked at least three times if everything was OK.

Ironically, I am fairly sure I wasn't the only trans person in the room. I was introduced to the "wife" of an obviously very gay man. I was impressed by how the trans woman could navigate the crowded surroundings in a pair of impossibly high heels. In fact, the shoes, combined with perfect makeup (to me) gave her away. Plus, she refused to make eye contact at all.

Next, it was time to say our sad goodbyes and head to a very busy grocery store for our weekly shopping. Other than dodging mean old people in electric carts, the whole trip was very mundane. People aren't there to notice anyone and the clerks are in "check out and get out" mode.

Our next stop was a fun one. We had a Witches Ball committee meeting at the place we are having the ball next week...one of the bigger local micro breweries. They have a big party room we are renting. The meeting always gives me a chance to sample one or two of the brewery's fall offerings. These days, two are about all I can handle! We were able to sit outside and conduct the meeting and figured out we were still missing a couple items for a gift basket we are setting up an auction for. So, it was time to leave the brewery, another very accepting place and head to a giant specialty beer store and purchase items for the basket.

The beer store is attached to a huge grocery store, so again Liz and I had to walk a long way to even find the beer section. Find it we did and our day was almost over.

As we made our way back home, I had a chance to reflect back on the day and how far I have come in the world as a transgender woman.   

Support?

Tonight is the transgender - cross dresser support group meeting I go to on a regular basis. Usually when I go, I wonder what imaginable support I could give anybody. Then I started to realize I can lend a helping hand with the occasional comment and by just being there. Normally, I am considered the "elder" in the group and can add insight into how life was for trans people even before there was such a term.

I hope too, some of my insights may mean something but who knows. Perhaps I am doing it as much for me as I am for others. After all, one of my reasons for starting Cyrsti's Condo at all, was to pay forward any of my experiences which could be beneficial to anyone else.

Changing the subject, yesterday turned out to be an interesting day too. The day itself could only be described as a "raw" day. Chilly, windy and gray with very light misty rain. In the middle of it all, here our little group was huddled in a local park picnic shelter discussing the Cincinnati Witches Ball Halloween party.

At the last meeting, I asked if the leader of the group needed help setting up our usual table at Pride this June. My answer came yesterday when she slammed a couple pieces of paper down in front of me and said since I wanted to do Pride, here it was. She was so angry and stressed, she ended up quitting the group a short time later. So now, since I opened my mouth before, I am in charge of our Pride booth. It's not that big of a deal if I can get the paper work and/or promotional materials we always use.

I should have learned along time ago, don't open your mouth and volunteer, unless you want to be accepted. Besides, I always have such a great time at Pride!

Boys Will be Girls

In what will probably be my last Witches's Ball post, I remembered I promised to tell all of you if I saw any/many cross dressers and/or beginning transgender women at the ball.

The answer is just a couple over the course of the evening out of an estimated 150 attendees.

As you can see to the left, I was afforded a great seat to sit and "people" watch.

Both of the other cross dressers were very young and thin and one was dressed as a skeletal witch and the other just as a girl. One looked like she was wearing her own hair and the other had a cheap Halloween store blond knock off.

Liz had a chance to make eye contact with the second who was there with a group of girls and received a shy smile in return.

I couldn't make eye contact with either which was different because of all the other eye contact I made.

Maybe next year they will be back!

The Winds of Change

One of the reasons I like living here in the Midwest is the fact we have seasons. While I'm the first to whine about the heat of summer or the cold of winter, I'm making the deal just to get to fall.

As the lush greens turn to the browns, reds and golds of the landscape around me, any sort of wind at all reminds me of primeval change.

Sure, I can tie in the change to my transgender transition but in reality the shift in the world around me goes so much deeper.

Every year at this time though, I do take a second to consider the gender changes I have been through and those that are yet to come.  As sure as the squirrels in my back yard are beginning to harvest the newly fallen walnuts and the drug dealers down on the corner are sporting their new hoodies, it's time for me to take stock of my sweaters and long sleeved tops.

It's ironic how the priorities of the season have changed. Most of you know I'm a sports fanatic of sorts and a football fan above all else but now I have to consider what I'm wearing to watch The Ohio State Buckeyes or the Cincinnati Bengals with my friends. As a transgender girl, I always have to try to make sure I'm doing the style gig a bit better than the genetic girls - if I can.  At the least, cause some of them step up their game too.

The fun part is now that fall really is just beginning. The true colors on the tree's haven't arrived yet and all the fall festivals are still around the corner with "nummers" such as home made apple butter. Better yet the season wraps up with Halloween and my chance to attend the **Cincinnati Witches Ball as a "Zombie Bride" -compliments of my very talented girlfriend.

So, like most of you I have spent my life waiting for the "other shoe to drop".  I have always preferred to call it waiting for "the other foot to fall."

This year I have been in touch with "Momma Karma" to see if the foot can "fall" another time. Preferably after fall is over.

**The "mission" of the Witches Ball:
Our mission: to hold one kick-ass costume party each and every year, with the most fabulous, talented performers we can find, gifted readers in our divination room, vendors with the best wares....raffles, a costume contest, moderately insane pirates, & steampunkers. (As well as raise money for a wonderful cause in the process!)

Nice!!!!!!!!!!!!