Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Ker Plunk! A Thanksgiving Sunday Edition is hitting your virtual front porch. It's a cold chilly gray day here in Ohio, but actually a little warmer than the norm and perfect for a toasty "Cup O Joe"- grab a cup and let's get started!

Page One-The Week That Was or Wasn't: Nothing jumps out which was radically different. We found out again, Caitlin Jenner peered out from her gilded closet and proclaimed support for all the politicians who want to discriminate the transgender community but then comes out and says "keep it together all-will be OK." No surprises, after all Caitlin has a whole new season of her show coming up. Plenty of time to establish a foundation for in need transgender kids and call for equal trans rights...or not. Jenner has to remember, transgender is not spelled with a "H" -for hypocrite. 

Page Two-Deep Sadness: As Transgender "Days or Remembrance"  have or will still be celebrated around the world. All of us should take the time to never forget our "sisters and brothers" who often have paid the ultimate price for simply being born.  May the elusive peace denied them during life, find them on the "other side." In the meantime, radical conversion therapy still continues to drive kids to suicide.

Page Three-Giving Thanks: Tis now the season to begin looking around at the people that some times form our new families. Take my brother for example. He stuck the turkey knife in my back and said his family would "rather not" have the real me at dinner. Sure I was hurt but Liz and my daughter were both pissed to the point of saying "hell no they won't go if I 'butch it up." I no I am so fortunate to have in essence a whole back up family in that Liz and I were invited to my daughter's in laws and her family's Thanksgiving get togethers. With open arms. Shame on my brother.

For those who aren't so fortunate, it is a desperately lonely and dark time. A season for us who have a little extra love to pass around - to do it!!!!

Page Four-The Back Page: Beginning this week for me is another round of medical "stuff."
Monday, it mammogram time, Wednesday is shrink time and time to drop off the rest of my gender marker paper work at the probate court. In the meantime, remember thanks for stopping by the "Condo" and I love you all!

Trangender In the Heartland?

Yes, we who happen not to live on the right or left coast of the United States, do know there is secretly a rich tapestry of life which happens. Now,  ironically, the flood of reality shows are beginning to shed a bit more light on arguably one of the more bland places in the country-the Midwest. It's our secret and we are sticking to it, except now Kansas City is coming out of the transgender closet: From Discovery:

Kansas City is about to be the setting for a new reality TV show – but it’s not about barbecue, fountains or jazz. The show, called New Girls On the Block, follows a group of transgender women. Shot in 50 locations around town at the end of last year, it debuts on the new Discovery Life Channel on April 2.

Robyn and her boyfriend, Andrew, shared a laugh as they prepared dinner Tuesday evening at their home in the Waldo area. Robyn is a transgender cast member on a new five-part Discovery Life Channel series set to air in April. Keith Myers The Kansas City Star

Read more here: http://www.kansascity.com/entertainment/article9729632.html#storylink=cpy

Another experience line from the show from Discovery Life said New Girls on the Block will be the first reality TV series about a group of friends in the transgender community. It focuses on four couples, all of them from Kansas City. (Including the couple above.)
And, there’s Macy and Sharon, a middle-aged, married couple – Macy used to be a strapping, motorcycle-riding man.
"He was the man all my friends were like, 'Girl don’t you mess this up,'" says Sharon.
Now that Macy has transitioned, viewers will get a glimpse of how her marriage to Sharon is evolving.

Now the question is, will "reality" be more "real" since it is coming from the "Heartland?"

Lonely Girls

It is seriously tragic how many of us in the transgender community suffer terrific loneliness. I can understand the world as a whole not understanding us but it has always been surprising to me how few  transgender people I have been able to meet. In my limited world, on Facebook alone, I know I have at least 75 peeps who claim to be transgender within an hours drive from me who haven't uttered one word about meeting for coffee or whatever. So, I wasn't surprised that just in the two or three days I have had my computer back up and running, I have had two comments on the subject of being alone already.

One was a comment Frock Magazine received on my article in their last publication:

Hi,  
My name is Nancy Wilhelm. I am transitioning at the age of 61. Your article "It's Never Too Late to Change" by Cyrsti Hart really hit me. I can really relate to what she had to say. While I face some of the same things she does I also have other issues. I am retired and on SSDI with no reserve. So, most (99%) of the things we need to do to really transition I can't afford. Also, the city I live in, as far as the transgender community, is really weird. I have met one (1) other TGirl total. The girls here are not interested in getting to know you unless you are young and looking for sex. I'm neither, so I have a total of five friends, 3 that I might see once every other month. In other words I'm a lonely girl here. Loved your magazine. I'm going to bookmark it. Hope you can keep it free. Nice to find something I can enjoy. Looking forward to the next issue.

Hugs, Nancy

The other was from a much younger person just exploring her gender identity, along with a supportive girlfriend but with no other idea of how to go any farther.  Fortunately for her, she lives within an easy driving distance of Columbus, Ohio which is an incredibly diverse city. I recommended that at the least , maybe her girlfriend and her should make the trip to Columbus Pride in June to at the least see how the "other half's" live. I did feel bad I couldn't come up with any better ideas of how to find a trans friend or even a trans group.  Maybe I'm being the bitch again but I agree with Nancy's take on what the majority of the "participant's" are into and it's not me either.

Truthfully, I gave up years ago finding transgender friends on line. I got burnt early when the trans "nazi's" got a hold of me and went my own way.   So, I do have my circle of wonderful friends and yes two of them are transgender and they are local.

It is exceedingly difficult to find a friend but far from impossible.  The "T" is beginning to not be as silent in the G&L Centers and there are some resources, plus there are good folks mixed in with the trans trolls.  It's just a shame we all have to go through yet another super difficult process.

Be sure to follow the link above to Frock Magazine and my "two cents worth" on page 30!

If it Walks Like a Duck, Looks Like a Duck, is it a Duck?

I started to write this Cyrsti's Condo post after I read someone's comment (I paraphrase), if she was able to interact with women - as a woman- does that make her a woman?  Good question and way too complex to discuss in one post-or ten.

Since the venerable "sex is between the legs" and "gender is between the ears" quote is beginning to go the route of most other "discussions" in the transgender community - into bickering hell, I had to try to come up with something different to toss into the mix.  Eventually I went from hell no that's too easy, to why not? She just could be on to something. If gender is a perception held mainly from others, then she is a woman because she is perceived as one plus she perceives herself as one. Finally, I came away with one certainty,  all the thinking made my head hurt!  Remember the old cheap shot, "look at the head on that?" What would have Einstein thought? Is that what happened to his hair?

As I said though, I didn't plan on continuing to write on the vague concepts above.  (Aren't you lucky?) Instead, a mere three word question got my attention, "are you (me) a pre opt transsexual?"  Well, in the strictest of terms yes and no.  Yes, because of totality of my lifestyle and No, because I don't feel the need for surgery (SRS).

That's as simplistic as my backward noggin can make it.  Without another headache of course!

Oh-Oh! Now What?

Perhaps you have read this story which I am passing along from the Huffington Post and Stephanie Mott:

The recent CBS story regarding nine Swedish women who received uterus transplants undoubtedly caught the attention of transgender women throughout the world. Anyone, with even the slightest awareness of the advancement of medical science, understands that eventually there will be few things left in the realm of impossible. 

The idea that a transgender woman will one day be able to carry a child in her womb is no longer just an idea. It is a reality of the future. Another story in the Dallas Voice is evidence to this fact as Sarah Luiz has positioned herself as a candidate to become the first transgender woman to potentially give birth. Anyone, with even the slightest awareness of society's obsession with sex and gender, understands that the word controversy applies to this situation in the same way the word skirmish applies to World War II.

Of course this story will shake up many of the radical feminists and other hate groups who attack the transgender community.  Then again, the RadFemmes are probably figuring how this is yet another example of the "male privilege" crowd discriminating against genetic women. Just don't bring up the fact these uterine transplants were for genetic women born without a uterus. There has to be a conspiracy "gender invasion" theory somewhere!

Finally, I'm passing along this quality paragraph from Stephanie which ties the whole subject together:


Any controversy that comes from transgender women seeking to experience pregnancy and give birth to children is based on the same ignorant myth that creates controversy about bathrooms and locker rooms - the myth that transgender women are not really women. How absurd is the idea that someone other than me could possibly know who I am? If it were possible for me to be a man, I would have done that long ago. God knows, I tried. As a woman, it is quite expected that I might have the same desires that many other women have. Among those desires is the desire to be a mom; the desire to carry a child. If medical advances offer that possibility to transgender women, it is no different than offering that possibility to cisgender women. 

Follow the link above for more.

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Greetings all! to another "Sunday Edition" here in "the Condo".  Get a cup of coffee and let's get started!

Weather Section.- Finally the dreaded "Arctic Vortex" has headed back to where it belongs and life is getting back to a semblance of normalcy around here in Southern Ohio as we thaw out.  As I whined incessantly, it figures the coldest weather in a couple decades settles in when HRT has settled in on me! Not a good combination.

Comments Section.- I'm still catching up!  Of interest was Paula's response to genetic men and transgender women:
 As an observation on the sex (rather than gender) front, I have found that all the women I encounter accept Paula, whatever their sexuality, all the gay men I have met so far have accepted me too, the only ones who have any problems are the straight guys, I wonder why, I think this is the only group to who I can represent a perceived threat, Gay men don't care because I'm a woman, gay women don't care because I'm a man straight women don't care because I'm a woman, but some straight men are confused, is it because I undermine their masculinity, or are the confused because they don't know how to interact with me, or are they frightened by their own reaction? One day I will ask.

Thanks Paula, I think your last two points are the best!  Genetic men don't know how to interact with us and are frightened by their own reactions.  In a round about way, I think we see it all the time with all the cross dressing fetish profiles on line with (dare I say) ridiculous pictures.  Of the two genders, men are wired to be the sexual beings who see all women first in a sexual sense. Breasts, booty, legs, face etc are triggers.Chances are, a cross dresser or a transgender woman does present one or more of those "triggers" and the confusion is on about where to take it.  Then again, there is the old story of those who "protest too much." and have long harbored cross dressing fantasies of their own but have never acted on them. When and if they do I think they form a basis of the CD fetish group we see.  Bottom line is Paula, when you start asking, save the answers and start a survey. I think everyone would be interested!

Leanne sent in a comment on the "Drag Queen" New Years Eve video:

Cyrsti, Every TG person needs to watch this video; not to emulate the drag queen but to watch the lack of reaction almost everyone you see in the background has towards these two girls. Most people these days have seen it all and just don't care anymore. Thanks for posting.

Thanks for responding Leanne!  Great point!  Certainly the world is changing around where I live and peeps kind of treat me as a curiosity if they notice me at all.  I know novice girls just heading out of their closets are positively paranoid of the world but as one of my genetic friends once told me "Relax ego girl, it doesn't all have to be about you!"  Those people weren't even talking about you.

Media Watch.- Last week the ever "cutesy" Katie Couric hosted two transgender icons on her show, possibly for the last time.  The main reason is the show is being cancelled because Couric is moving to Yahoo is some sort of major move.  The other is the push back from the line of questioning. I have of yet not seen the show with transgender women  Carmen Carerra and Laverne Cox.  Critics are saying essentially Couric was more interested in how many operations both women had went through rather exploring their lives in depth and the pressing issues facing the transgender community as a whole. I am reserving my final thoughts on the issue until I see the show because I know our community is a tough group to please-and should be. There is too much wrong and we desperately need transgender icons such as Laverne and Carmen to speak out! How great is it though to finally have more "icons" to speak out!

Well, it's time to take the dog for a walk. Even she feels the deep freeze is over for at least a week or two and it's time to work off some of our lingering extra pounds from the holidays.

Take care of yourselves and thanks for taking the time to stop by Cyrsti's Condo!

The "Anti Jerry Springer?"

Jasmine Ford

Let's hope so! You can only hear "I was born a man" or "tranny" so much in the same hour. According to the Miami New Times a new talk show for the transgender "niche" will started on line this week.

 "Jasmine Ford, is lending her voice -- and face -- to Miami's transgender community with her talk show, The Gender Experience. Ford, 41, describes her middle class upbringing in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, as traditional, where topics such as gender disorders were never discussed. She recalls how other children around her would "solidify their gender identity and begin learning and mimicking the appropriate behavior prescribed for their sex." But for her, and others like her, this did not happen. "The popular description of being 'trapped in the wrong body' is an accurate one," says Ford."


The Gender Experience actually premiered last night,  Thursday, December 19, at 10 p.m. on TruRythme.TV. Personal inquires can be made to thegenderexperience@gmail.com, and the live taping will be held at CL Gaskin Center (5525 NW Seventh Ave., Miami).

For more on if you can listen on line and the story go here.

Tyra Scott- Sexual Hybrid?

You may want to put the kids to bed as this is one of the few "adult rated" posts you will see in Cyrsti's Condo.  I'm passing it along because the story actually goes past Tyra Scott just being a transsexual adult performer.

She discusses connections with the everyday transgender community, why she is still "pre opt" and what her life was like growing up.





From the Daily Loaf

in Tampa, Florida:


(Tyra Scott) : "Straight men are traditionally the most intolerant of the transgender community. Straight men are also the primary consumers of transsexual porn. This is why adult tube sites pepper clips of transsexuals in with other, "straight" offerings. These companies know that, behind closed doors, many straight men sample transsexual porn. In this way, ts performers have become X-rated ambassadors of the transgender community.

The more comfortable straight men become masturbating in private to these performers, the more tolerant they will be in public of the transgender community. Not only do these rogue performers represent the transgender community, they also embody the rainbow of diversity that exists in human sexuality and gender. In an effort to better understand this increasingly popular form of erotica, as well as the GLBT community as a whole."

So now, you don't have to be so critical of your friends watching porn! They are learning the attraction of sexual hybrids! Like so many of you I'm sure you view this with distaste. Not because so much because of content but once again we trans women are being portrayed in exactly the wrong light.  The same problems genetic women face.

At the least,  interesting ideas and you can follow the link above for more.

Walked on the "Wild Side"

Of course I noticed immediately the passing of Lou Reed, of the Velvet Underground fame. Lou Reed appeared on the scene as I was questioning my gender identity seriously for the first time.  I say seriously because down deep I knew cross dressing was just not going to be an end all solution for me but I was afraid to look at other alternatives which would effectively change my life forever.

Lou Reed

Reed's biggest hit "Walk on the Wild Side" hit the charts in 1972, and homosexuality was still classified as a mental illness by the American Psychiatric Association In the middle of all of this  "The Wild Side" hit the airwaves and was.famously written about a gay hustler and several trans people, including his friend and Warhol-muse Candy Darling.

It is important to note Lou Reed had more than a commercial or passing interests in transgender women. He  had his own personal trans muse in the form of Rachel, a Mexican hairdresser variously described as transvestite and transsexual by her contemporaries. Rachel and Reed appeared  to have been lovers for much of the 70s and fans suggest she inspired some of his greatest work.

Quite possibly though, Lou Reed's greatest gift to the transgender community is he outed us all to the world.  All of a sudden we existed.  Plus, many of us were very exotic and even cool!

At the time,  Lou Reed was yet another exciting influence for me during a time of flux in my life. I was graduating college and into the Army and I most of the time I joked and said, "I got stoned and missed him"- but the opposite was true.

 I hope his final "Walk on the Wild Side" is a good one!  RIP Lou!

Read more on Lou Reed courtesy of Paris Lees ... here.

What Does Transgender Mean to You?

Many times we miss the forest for the trees as we go on a trip of gender self discovery. Plus, if you are "more mature" like I am, it was literally years before a term such as transgender became well known at all.

Today though, the term transgender has become a "catch all term" for gender fluid women and men all the way to transsexuals. In a rare moment of clarity, I stopped my world and thought, was does transgender mean to me and am I correct in applying it to myself.

Very simply, my own personal definition is transgender means exactly what it implies, "neither male or female but somewhere in between." I'm in transit between the genders something like this - when I'm not forced to crawl around and fix plumbing in my house, I yearn for a pair of fuzzy slippers to keep my feet warm. Similar to any other genetic male or female, I'm doing what I have to do to keep this place and my body together.

I fielded a question today from a person from another site who sought me out for advice, of which I'm always flattered. Very quickly as a point of reference, the conversation turned into a discussion of percentage. How much did I live as a woman versus how much she did and how did HRT effect the whole process. We actually were exact opposites. My "time as girl" was very high and hers was very low.

I consider "chats" such as these are a good way to reassess who I am. At the same time I have a chance to give a person who is thinking about seeing a therapist as the first step towards HRT, a little insight into the process. I continue to feel the true tragedy within the transgender community are people who never really learn their true spot in the gender world, until it's too late. Indeed, the landscape is dotted with those who went under the SRS knife only to learn the ultimate cut just wasn't the right one for them or the older folks who will forever wonder if they should have tried.

So, I know the transgender term is a comfy place for me to hang out because no matter how the outside world is viewing me, I know what my head is thinking.

Recently too, I have several visitors here in the Condo and other places ask how I knew I was trans and not a cross dresser or transsexual.  The answer was quite simple as I look back on it. I never felt whole just putting on women's clothes but once I did begin to feel whole, I knew SRS wouldn't make my situation any better. As I said, my head tells me I'm a trans woman, not what the configuration is between my legs.

I'm fond of saying I don't have any therapy shingles to hang up anywhere and the best advice I never got was the most important one: You really have no idea of how the other gender lives until you have the chance to peek in and live it and the process better go deeper than just prancing around in a mall. (Did that too!) Just a guess but before you label yourself, it would be a tremendous idea to learn what the label is all about.

Oh by the way, no charge for this session!

Gossip Monger!

Got to love the lipstick!

Awwwwright! I may like a little celebrity gossip as much as the next girl- transgender or not.
From IBT  to the Cyrsti's Condo gossip section:

Recently Lauren Harries (left) made headlines when she revealed her alleged fling with comedian and actor Russell Brand - and now the transgender star is plotting to name and shame some of her other high-profile conquests. Harries claimed that she had a brief fling with Brand after they met during the seventh series of Big Brother in 2006.

She said that Russell was hosting Big Brother's Big Mouth and Lauren was asked to be a guest on the after-show. "I knew it would take a man with real awareness and strength to take me on," she said. Brand has denied the allegations. "With respect to the ol' transgender community, I didn't have it off with the antiques kid," he tweeted. But Harries insisted that their nights of passion did happen.

Of course there is a forthcoming book and Harries, The Celebrity Big Brother contestant, who finished third in this year's final, will reveal the identities of the stars she said she has bedded in an explosive new tell-all book.

"P.O.ing" One Million Moms!

Wow, I thought I may be in trouble when I was in trouble with just one Mom. My own!

Super Hero SheZow has did the impossible and aggravated One Million Moms at once! ShaZam!!!!!!!!!

Here's the story from Advocate.com:

"One Million Moms called Hub Network's decision to air SheZow an "attempt by the gay, lesbian and transgender community to indoctrinate our children into accepting their lifestyles." The so-called million moms (whose Facebook friends actually number fewer than 60,000) went on to declare, "The media is determined to pollute the minds of our children and there is no better way to desensitize them than through a cartoon program. Everyone knows children are drawn to animated shows; both boys and girls love superheroes.

This character especially will appeal to both boys and girls since the superhero represents both genders by cross-dressing and being transgendered."

 That's pretty loaded language for an otherwise innocuous show that doesn't actually star a character who identifies as trans."

Being the moral "God fearing" group they are- God forbid if they would have to sit down with their children and explain how a diverse culture is good for them!

I'm Married to a...

The vh1 series "I'm married to a..." has scored another must view for our transgender community. Not too long ago we saw Jessica of Jessica Who blog fame and her wife courageously present a very enlightening look at a crossdresser and his wife coming out of the closet. Now a new episode features a new Jessica and Scott, who happens to be a transgender man. Highlights as I saw them, included Scott's dialogue on being a person who happens to be trans not a transgender person first and foremost. Of equal importance was Jessica's religious and church background. This show is yet another look into our culture from the eyes of  real people who have something to say.

I'm Married To A...

Social Security Steps Up

From ThinkProgress  Victory for the Transgender Community!:


"Today marks an important victory for the transgender community, even though it may appear to be a small paperwork technicality. The Social Security Administration (SSA) has announced that it is now much easier for trans people to change their gender identity on their Social Security records. All that will now be required, according to the National Center for Transgender Equality, is for individuals to submit government-issued documentation reflecting a gender change, or a certification from a physician confirming they have undergone appropriate clinical treatment for gender transition.

 This is a significant departure from the previous policy, which required documentation of complete sex reassignment surgery. Many trans people never undergo such procedures, either because they are too expensive, because they do not want to lose their procreative ability, or because it simply isn’t an important change for them to make to find authenticity in their identities. The SSA change eliminates this high standard for trans people to obtain the appropriate documentation for the gender that reflects how they live their daily lives. Though Social Security cards do not display gender, the SSA does maintain that information as data, and it can impact other governmental programs. For example, individuals seeking coverage under Medicaid, Medicare, Supplemental Security Income, or other public benefits could face complications if their gender markers do not match from form to form and identification to identification. In addition to an invasion of their privacy, the discordance could even lead to a denial of benefits.

 The new change will eliminate the obstacles trans people can face to access protections they often need because of other forms of discrimination they otherwise experience in society."

This is positively HUGE for people like me!

Government Apology?

In the United States a "government apology" is nearly as rare as a Polar Bear taking a stroll through my backyard in the middle of a hot Ohio summer.

Everyonce in a while though a surprising apology or two sneaks through in other countries- such as Malta which is located around the Mediterranean Sea, just south of Sicily and east of Tunis. Perhaps you remember Malta making news recently as Joanne Cassar (right) continued a fight which began in 2006 and continued five years to 2011. At that time Cassar sued Malta in the European Court of Human Rights, which ruled in 2011 that her fundamental rights to marriage and family life had been violated by Maltese law.

The apology came from
Partit Nazzjonalista deputy leader for Parliamentary Affairs Mario de Marco has said in a recent speech that the party has let the transgender community down by refusing to recognize our rights. In his own speech he said the previous PN government "might have let transgender persons down" Later he even went back and corrected the "might" word and deleted it.

No matter how seemingly tiny, in whatever country- stories such as this should give us all in the transgender community just a little more drive to push on. Plus the sacrifice of individuals such as Joanne Cassar to push on when she could have hid in the stealth closet which so many of us run to in fear is truly inspiring!

For more on this story, please go here
.

Shop till You?

It is difficult to believe but a story of a transgender woman being discriminated against by a JC Penny's store is over a year old now.
I interact on a couple other sites and last night I received this incredible, informational answer to my post. I wasn't very clear I wasn't writing about myself and here was the response from
Chrissy-Xena:

"Unfortunately in any large store, especially where many employees are more clerks rather than professionals some will bring their personal beliefs in to work and try to over-ride the usual store/company policies when they feel personally justified to do so (such as religious views, right-wing ones, bigotry etc). Too bad you didn't get wait to see what the manager would have said to you, and then if not accepting of you and using the woman's fitting room then to get both their names and make an official complaint. Chances are the company would have backed you, given you came in the store dressed as a woman, and conducted yourself as such. And having your GF as a witness would have been a big plus in case they disputed the facts of the event. The company may have warned both the employee and manager not to discriminate again, and it they didn't agree to letting you, a customer, use the woman fitting room and/or female bathrooms then they should have been fired. If not then you could have filed a federal complaint (in some localities as well) or suit based on gender discrimination against the employee and company. Unfortunately this all sounds all so familiar to a similar incident a few years ago down at a Macy's store in Texas, and it was properly reported to management and dealt with sternly with the employee who refused to follow the inclusive policy of Macy's. The employee (also Black and conservative religious) used her religion as an excuse not to allow the transgender customer to also use the woman's fitting room, and wouldn't agree to change, so she was fired for just cause. Just know that if such a thing ever occurs again, to consider getting their names and making a proper complaint so that it can advance the cause of the greater transgender community. And without doing so that same two employees will keep discriminating against any "perceived" trans-persons that come in their area. BTW, if you ask for the store manager (if they have left for the day, the acting store manager will attend to your complaint). But following up with a written complaint ASAP to corporate so it won't be covered up (store managers won't send such complaints upstairs to corporate as they make him/her look bad ...they didn't train their employees well on store/company policies or deal well with it when it did occur, etc.) and will help enforce our basic civil rights. You may not wish to sue, but if you do then likely some trans-legal aid will back you and provide free legal services. But always ...always file complaints, they are cheap and most of the time they work to make changes without filing a lawsuit. At the very least the employee is likely to be fired if they don't change their behavior, even if they don't change their negative viewpoints about trans-persons. PS I have had "reverse discrimination" myself as when years ago I worked as an employee, at a Macy's nonetheless, a revengeful TG ex-friend filed false complaint against me with the BBB (she pretended they were a woman customer and was "shocked to see a man dressed as as a woman's employee" etc) and tried to get me removed from selling in the woman's clothing area, just out of spite. Once I found out who had caused me to be transferred to the men's department I told corporate HR (which was quite embarrassing as I hadn't revealed my trans-status so this "outed" me at a job where I "passed" 100%) they put me BACK in the same woman's area where I was an outstanding saleswoman). I then sued the TG for filing the false complaint, went to court and argued the case myself and WON! Remember, you are the highly valued customer shopping in a store where they are sinking fast with lowering sales, and they NEED every single customer regardless of their personal characteristics. Chances they WILL do something about any such complaint you file, and eliminate the problem one way or the other. My philosophy is "stand your ground!" Then "fight back." It feels so much better at the end of the day."

My response to her was I agreed with JC Penny's recent earnings, they would certainly value any shopping dollar. Plus I have rarely faced any dressing room problems as I shop. Perhaps the saddest part is the story of transgender women again fighting among themselves.

Only the Beginning

You may recall Coy as the 6 year old transgender girl who was one of the guests on the Katie Couric Show  this week. (here).

Coy

As it turns out at the tender age of six, Coy's struggles are just beginning.
In a move- which could be on a show called "are you smarter than a first grader" (I know the real show is a 5th grader), Coy's school officials at Fountain-Fort Carson School District told her parents that their child could no longer use the girls’ bathroom at Eagleside Elementary.

That shocked her parents, said her mother, Kathryn Mathis. identified  The child had gotten through kindergarten with no problems and no complaints from anyone at the school. (of course)

Fortunately, this whole story is far  from over as a prominent transgender rights group announced  that it  filed a discrimination complaint in Colorado on behalf of Coy. It seems in this case Coy is being used as an example. If her restroom usage is determined now any future problems with unhappy parents could be headed off- if there are any.

The good news is anti-discrimination laws are finally being applied to the transgender community and this shy child has been forced into the spotlight to challenge blatant discrimination. Read more of the story here.

Transgender Law

No it's not a new television show (unfortunately). My friend Bobbie was kind enough to send along this information from a police publication called "Dealing with Transgender Subjects". Here is an excerpt:

"Officers must often protect and serve members of special groups. Providing this service can bring challenges that demand agency guidance or targeted training. One such group that has rarely been seen or contacted by officers in the past has become empowered to step out and live openly in their communities. They are the transgender individuals. On every continent there is at least one culture that gives social recognition to individuals who don't fit the gender binary of male or female. Only until recently has medicine made it possible to match the individual to their appearance with surgical procedures. Our Western societies have forced these individuals underground (into "the closet") to survive by avoiding ridicule and persecution. Being transgender has nothing to do with who you are attracted to for sex; it is not attached to sexual attraction identifiers such as being gay, lesbian, or bi-sexual. You can be transgender and also be gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, straight, or none of the above. Being trans is about your gender identity; it's who you feel and know you are. Our society develops a spectrum of gender possibilities from ultra-masculine to ultra-feminine and every variation in-between."

Obviously it's refreshing to see law enforcement taking a look at the transgender community for what it really is. The huge majority of all of us are not sex workers or some sort of criminal up to no good. Which used to be the norm in how we were presented. Over the years I have been fortunate enough to be treated with respect in my dealings with law enforcement. Perhaps more information such as this will continue that trend for the entire transgender community.

Read more here.

Trans Layers

Even though I have been heavily involved in research of the transgender community, I'm always amazed how much more I'm missing.
This morning a link to B.O.I.S Will Be Blogging Bois. appeared in my email.
Of course many aspects of the transgender man and masculine identified women culture are familiar to me.
But many aren't, so my interest is always heightened when I have a chance to read more:

"One year ago, Latania McKenzie sat down at her computer and with a few clicks started putting into action a dream she’d had for years — a blog that caters to masculine-identified women as well as to transgender men. Named Queer B.O.I.S., the blog espouses the values McKenzie, 30, and her partner and blog co-founder, Taliba, aspire to in their professional and personal lives. While B.O.I.S. is meant to quickly identify its target audience, the letters also have meaning: Business, Opulence, Investment and Style. McKenzie, 30, moved to Atlanta 12 years ago from Belgium. She likes to shop in the men’s department and has a deep affection for pocket squares and bow ties. She said the blog is meant to bring visibility to a community that is often overlooked in the media. And while her first name is Latania, she prefers to just be called McKenzie. “When I walk down streets I see a lot of people look who look like me that are masculine presented. We shop in the men’s department or mix our clothing with women’s clothes. But there is not really a focus on us in media,” she says. “We make money, too. And the media should advertise to us and notice us. What I want people to know is we are not average. Don’t dismiss us,” she says. And that’s why B.O.I.S. and what the letters stand for is more than an identity, McKenzie says. It’s a way of life."

As always, I'm giving you a glimpse here.  Follow this link for more!

So Much for Predictions

I am really glad the election is over and my home state of Ohio didn't screw it up for the country. For what ever reason, Florida wants to keep that title. I could be cynical and say they still could be voting there  for all I know. More realistically they at the least are still counting!  Doesn't matter,  we still have an official winner-on time.

Also on time is my body shifting back to a little higher feminizing mode. I have been back on the summer dosage of hormones  for the last week  As I wrote before I had to cut back to a smaller dosage as I waited for the VA to work their magic. Now my breasts are getting a little sorer again so life is good.

In the life goes on department in Cyrsti's Condo...Let's see, playing with my big hair over the top "drag" look was fun.
My heart is still going out to all those poor folks on the East Coast who are still powerless and now are getting yet another storm.
Finally I still recoil and get physically ill at the sight of Rude Paul.

It doesn't seem possible the holiday season is almost here too.  It's a time of fun with family and friends but at the same time the loneliest time of the year for some in the transgender community rejected by those close to them.

Plus, let's not forget the Mayans predicted this was it anyhow. So I need to get ready.