One of the most intriguing (since I had never heard of it was) this from Calie:" I co-host a monthly lunch called the DRAB-Gab. Obviously, everyone dressed in male attire. This is an event sponsored by our local TG organization, which may just be the largest in the world...about 700 strong I believe, here in the center of the T-universe.
Many of our monthly attendees are first-timers, having never met another one of "our kind". One common thread we have found over the years is that there's a 50/50 chance that a "newbie" who RSVP's won't show up. Why? Because they're absolutely scared to death of being outed, or afraid that we're a bunch of pervs, or whatever.
I think your friend(?) had cold feet and is now absolutely embarrassed. She probably drove around the block several times...maybe even walked up to the coffee shop. At that point, she freaked out, turned around, and never looked back. That seems to be a common story that those who have RSVP'd for a second time, and did show up, have told us."
May I say, that's a significant membership and yes cross dressers as well as the rest of the LGBT family are invisible everywhere. And, did I miss exactly where the center of the T-universe is? Seriously, not being a smart arse!
The point I missed in my oft weak written communication is, I really don't put a value judgement where another person may-or may not be in their transition. I have always said though, my indecision tore me apart from within-to the point of a suicide attempt.
I also understand as well as any of you the sheer terror of heading out of the closet at all. In fact, I just met a trans woman from a little town about fifty miles south of Cincinnati who was just outed on FB. She was petrified. It's a confusing deal, because 'the Nati' is gaining on Columbus in pursuit of LGBT rights and Covington, Kentucky right across the river just added one female and one male police peeps specifically trained to deal with us.
So, I can understand why a closet is a safe place. The only thing I have ever advocated for is...hedge your bets because life can change and all of the sudden your closet door could open. And, if it does, you can protect yourself as much as possible by places such as the voting box. It's a fact in O.H.I.O you have to look under many rocks to find a Republican representative who is pro LGBT rights. It just is true. (After all, the 'Q' in LGBTQ is for 'questioning.'
There were a couple other comments on the post I want to get back to later today. It's time for another trip to the V.A to have my fluids checked!
