What's Next and Why?

Sometime ago at one of the transgender veteran support groups I go to, I found it interesting in the amount of push back I received when I mentioned my desire for a breast job. Specifically from one member who is 68 and going under the knife for a full blown sexual genitalia reassignment surgery. She could barely pee straight telling us all about it (and may not be able to afterwards.)

Good for her. I am glad she could achieve her life's goals and tell her detractors that once and for all she was a woman, including between the legs. I have said it many times though, there is so much more into "becoming a woman" than surgery. Somehow I don't think all the knives in the world can add or subtract the little extra which comes with being a "woman." It is my belief no matter your birth gender, you start the SRS process between and ears and finish between the legs.

Maybe I am wrong and when I see her next, she will be smiling ear to ear, still has a place to live, etc. (Yes, it still happens.)

In the mean time, I'm told by my partner Liz I can research having my breasts done if I prove I can go through the pain of a tattoo. The problem is what kind of a tattoo and where on my body. I keep telling her if I had the boob job first, then I would have extra space for the tattoo but so far she doesn't believe me.

So much for credibility, I might as well be a politician!

Unconditional Love?

From the "other" side I can't begin to understand the confusion and even the anguish involved for the wife and girl friend when her spouse/boyfriend comes out as a cross dresser or transgender woman to her.

I know there are the rare publicized relationships in which the wife "stands by her new partner" and I have all the respect in the world for those cis women.

In my case my deceased wife accepted from day one I was a cross dresser but rejected from day one any idea of me wanting to go the transgender route.

I can only imagine what she thought of me tottering around in skin tight skirts and high heels and don't want to.

I know too there would have been no way for our relationship to continue the way it was if she had not passed on, but I am sure we would have parted as friends.

What would have been very interesting would have been her take on the transition path I ended up taking.

She was rather conservative and would have approved for the most part of my jeans/flats style wardrobe but would have recoiled at my choice of hair color (violet.)

I have just met a fledgling trans girl who says she has come out to her wife and "she knows" I just wonder how much and if her and her family are ready for the rocky road ahead?

Transgender Mini Series

At times as I seriously begin to slave over my second book again, I get a chance to look back over the half century or so of time which took me to this point in my life.

Like the other day when my new endocrinologist asked me to start at the beginning.  Really? The story would be like a mini series on the history channel. We would have episodes along the way of playing football while wanting to be a cheerleader, raiding my Mom's clothes while they would still fit, and how about the doll I wanted for Christmas I never got?

The problem I had with her was trying to color in the space of time I spent exploring my possible transition from crossdresser to transgender woman-and yes there was a difference. I was so much more than an ex guy with hormone induced breasts and emotions sitting across from her.

Obviously, I was the first "up close and personal" trans woman she had ever met and was fascinated. I even fascinate myself, sometimes not in good ways which could be a another show.

I often wonder if I ever had the chance to be the "flaming star" of transgender women (like Caitlin Jenner), how would I handle it? To be sure better than her because at the least I have more empathy towards the trans community than she seemed to ever show. The again, she didn't have to "come up through the ranks" similar to someone such as Laverne Cox.


Even though I would like to show empathy though, I know it's tough because of the issues all of us have faced to get us here in the transgender tribe. One episode could be centered in how we as a tribe are still terribly cannibalistic. It's like we carry whats left of our male ego, then mix it in with our newly forming feminine ego.  We have talked about it here. Rather than say hello to another trans sister, we desperately hope her trans dar did not go off and read us.

Another interesting episode would take a look at the progression and in some cases digression our fashion senses take. Take me for example, I don't wear mini skirts or sky high heels but my jeans, flip flops and violet hair serve to announce my arrival and P.O. many other women my age. But you have probably figured by now...I don't care.

I could probably come up with two or three more shows without much trouble, like how does one become socialized as a woman etc... but more on that at a later time! Don't panic, I don't have a ton of producers knocking my door down anyway :)

Itty Bitty Share?

From Houston:

This year, "Jenifer René Pool became the first transgender candidate to win a primary election in Texas history, securing the Democratic nomination for Precinct 3 of the Harris County Commissioner’s Court. She celebrated by ordering a pizza, curling up with her cats, Aurora and Molly, and scrolling through incoming emails and Facebook messages—no glitzy rally, no prime-time speech. “It’s uncomfortable when you don’t win and people are just glad-handing you, slapping you on the back,” she says. “I had heard that enough.”

Pool’s reticence is understandable, rational even. In electoral politics, the transgender community is essentially invisible. According to research by political scientists Logan S. Casey and Andrew Reynolds, only 20 trans politicians hold elected office, at any level, in the entire world. Here in the U.S., no openly transgender person has ever served as a member of Congress or been elected and seated in a state legislature. “People have run, they have won, they have beaten the odds,” Reynolds tells us. “It’s still a tiny, tiny proportion.”

Jennifer Pool

Most certainly we transgender women and men number a small part of the population, but we are growing enough to reportively cause a shortage of estrogen in certain companies. So our tribe or "cult" as some like to put it, is expanding as more find it's safe to come out of the closet.

Follow the link above for more.

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day (Archive)

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

"The biggest risk of all is not taking one at all". Normally always heard from a person who took the risk and succeeded.
 I have never had a problem living this quote in my life, which leads me to the second quote:
"Some you win, some you lose and some get rained out."  The big difference these days is I carry a different style of rain gear!

Cyrsti's Condo "Archive Post"

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Transition by Definition

Earlier this week we ran a post here in Cyrsti's Condo called Beyond Transition. At that time I mentioned I had a few more thoughts to share on the matter.  Also, this week is home to "National Coming Out Day".

Huge ideas to be sure. I look at transition as a passage from point "a" to point "b".  When I look at the transgender community as a whole, does anyone ever really get to point "b"? My only point of reference is when I'm out with friends and I lose any sense of gender. I simply just am who I am. Have I transitioned, am I done? Am I the same as a transsexual woman who has gone through SRS and lives her life with no fanfare down your street? Could be...or not.

Although I have not had the surgeries the trans woman down the street has had, would her transition qualify as being more complete?  Probably not. In essence if either of us is facing taking estrogen till the day we die, we are still transitioning.  Perhaps the only defining separation is one of us is determined to talk about our life to hopefully lend some guidance to others - the other not and that's fine too.

On the other hand transitioning does imply a certain series of events.  The external move from gender "a" to "b" is very clear. You decide you need to change to live, you begin to socialize yourself in your non birth gender, you decide you want to ingest chemicals into your body to further the process and you go "under the knife" to complete any physical changes you may deem necessary. This black and white process looks very good on paper and especially works well with a male mind but often runs into problems with the mental processes.

In my case, some would assume I already have the problems with my mental processes, so it's been damn difficult on occasion to sort out what is coming from where.  An example is years ago on my first visit to a "gender therapist", she asked if I had any problems with my cross dressing. I said no but I did have problems on the effect it was having on my marriage.  To make a long expensive story short, the only good result of the visits was that she diagnosed me with a very clear bi-polar disorder.

So I guess transitioning is in the mind of the beholder.  The TS woman down the street may be "snug as a bug in the rug" in her stealth life.  On the other hand, I don't think I have ever been snug at anything. If the river is calm, bring me a boat to rock to see if I can tip it in my heels. Plus I hope I never lose the wonder of where this life has taken me.

Years ago when Uncle Sam let me go after three glorious years, I was discharged at Ft. Dix in New Jersey where my car was waiting from Germany.  I threw my duffel bag in the back seat of my 1973 VW Beetle and headed home to Ohio.  The next morning was clear, blue and beautiful when I got onto the Pennsylvania turnpike.  Just for a split second at a toll booth on a hill and had a chance to look at the road in the valley ahead. What a rush of freedom it was!  I thought I would never have a chance to reclaim that moment again but guess what - I'm close. Never say never.

So I guess my transition will only end when I depart this life and I look back and think how crazy it was that being transgender was so earth shattering. I will get back to you on that!

***Please note the link above may will not work for you. It's from 2013.

JJ's Sunday Edition

Ker Plunk! Welcome in to another Sunday Edition which is hitting your virtual front porch!

First the Weather...positively glorious here in Southwestern Ohio. Low humidity and highs around 80. Let's get a "cup o joe" (coffee) and get started.

Page One- The Week That Was-or Wasn't: As restroom battles continue to rage around the country and as transgender women try to figure out the proper etiquette to use an urinal in panties, it turns out our new trans girl Caitlin Jenner's show was cancelled for this season. If there was any true "realism" to Jenner's reality show, Jenner never got the true message about what being transgender is all about.

Page Two- Yesterday's Coffee-Opinion: Yesterday was a bittersweet day for me as I put some sad memories behind me and opened new horizons. On the way back from Columbus, Ohio we stopped at a place called "Thurmans" which is widely regarded as having the best one pound burgers in Columbus. This is a picture of my burger. In the past I could have easily eaten this, but yesterday I had to take half of it home with me. I guess I'm not the person I used to be :).

Page Three: The Back Page: Looking ahead into September it will be time to put together my packing for a vacation trip my partner Liz and I will be taking up to Maine.

I love leggings and big soft sweaters, so I will have to start digging mine out, plus Liz has promised my first trip to get my fingernails done in a salon (already had a pedicure once.)

Of course I may have to eat a Lobster!

Well kids, your violet haired Vixen (the name of the hair color I chose) needs to wrap this up and move along with this beautiful day.

Hope you are well and I love you all!

Cyrsti's Condo "Archive Post"

Monday, January 20, 2014

Pandora's Box

 I have wondered forever,  what role does an attractive cross dresser's feminine presentation play in possibly later moving her into a transgender existence? Is it similar to the worn out idea that a majority of heroin users got hooked because of marijuana? Did my first experiments with Mom's hose and underwear get me hooked, or was I just predestined to be who I am today? I believe the answer was a little of both. What caused me to open that Pandora's Box of goodies? By the way, this definition of "the box" comes from Wikipedia:  

The phrase "to open Pandora's box" means to perform an action that may seem small or innocent, but that turns out to have severe and far-reaching consequences. Certainly, the definition is correct. Little did I know how severe the gender torment I would feel during my lifetime and it's far reaching consequences. But what made me open the box?  My brother didn't and for all I know the greatest majority of male type kids in my school and town didn't. The simple answer is some sort of switch already existed in my noggin and I flipped it to "on".

Even more interesting is the number of "switches" we have ready to be turned on or off.  Why was it for me, the occasions I was told I made a better looking girl, was mistaken for one, or was made over to look like one, I felt worse about being a cross dresser a few days later. I believe now,  cross dressing never seemed to come closeto explaining my first gender switch. . Hell, I didn't have a  "switch", I had a 50 amp circuit breaker!

I flipped the breaker and got a better look into Pandora's Box. I saw all the glittering bling of new wigs, dresses and heels. They were sooooo inviting but sooooo non fulfilling.  Finally, after years of torment, I ignored the bling and went for substance and found a book called the My Little Book of Trans.  I grabbed it and found there was even an instruction guide, which of course I didn't read first. Who needs "no stinkin instructions?"

As I blissfully thumbed through the book's  pages from back to front (I'm dyslexic) I learned my obvious gender disconnect wasn't so obvious to me. I had to readbackward to  Chapter One in the "Book of Trans", to make some sense of my life as a trans woman.  A cross dresser looks like a woman, a transgender woman socializes herself as a woman and a transsexual acquires the sexual genetalia of a woman.  In addition, none of them ever become females and being a genetic female does not guarantee you're a woman.

Of course I spent 50 years fighting the crossdressing in me, five accepting the transgender spirit of my soul and no years obsessing on purchasing a store bought vagina.

At this point in my life, I have to blame my slow learning on someone, so  I'm blaming it on Pandora!  I've been known to be nothing if not persistent.  Seems as if I kept bugging our girl with the box just long enough, she got up off the "good stuff" and threw the book at me!

By the way, "My Little Book of Trans" exists only in my fertile "itty bitty" mind.

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

Street Walkin with Connie Donald, Jenner and Mo

From Connie:

"One of the street-regulars that I talk to often has mentioned to me a few times that he imagines I have trouble with people accepting me or, at the least, giving me stares and strange looks. I've told him that he is incorrect on that assumption, and the last time I did give him the explanation for it (I don't usually do that, but it had gotten to the point where he needed some education). I told him that I have so very few problems because they are not MY problems. I am confident in who I am, and I believe it shows by the way I carry myself. My God, if Donald Trump can convince so many people that he knows who he is and what he's doing (albeit through total ego tripping), why shouldn't I, a trans woman, be able to garner a degree of acceptability?

 Of course, I am not running completely on ego, as I have gone through a lot of shit to get to this point, that of humility and compassion, as well as acceptability and respectability. I don't really care how people might be labeling me, except that I'm sure many of them may change their views after even a brief encounter with me. For the most part, I pass as I pass by (or, at least, pass-able to be walking down the same street as the masses). I do not pass completely upon closer inspection, as I possess too many of the characteristics the testosterone gave me (big hands, broad shoulders, a neck that football training left too large, etc.) My voice could be a give-away many times, but I've been told that it is a low, soothing and feminine voice when talking to people face-to-face (the same sort of thing happens with my singing voice, where an audio recording may make me sound like a man singing, it works just fine when I'm performing live).

So, like Shelle, I have no desire to be noticed as trans - or a tran-ny, for sure. I try to do my best with what I've got, and I've learned to be happy with that. My confidence in who I am is what I want to be noticed for, and I'm happy with that, as well. That may be enough to reinforce someone's favorable opinion of me, or it may do a bit to change a more-bigoted person's mind in a positive way. However, I can't really control what anybody thinks - but I can control how I think... and behave."

Behave...I doubt????

FYI...one of Trump's big supporters - Caitlin Jenner's show has been cancelled. Another trans fraud back into the shadows.

Trans Dar?

Any more I don't know if mine works, or if it just serves to put me into a mine field.

Take today for example. I went to my first endocrinologist appointment at the Cincinnati VA Hospital Center. The difference being the Cinci center is much bigger than my former one in Dayton, Ohio. I checked myself into the "Endo" waiting room and there was a woman sitting there by herself. For all the world she looked trans but when I tried to speak she shot me a withering glance.

So I don't know if she truly was or wasn't transgender which brings another question, "Why does the potential for abuse exist at all between trans sisters?"

I know Connie for one has touched on it. As we pass each other on the street, we still carry enough ego to think being "busted" by another trans person is some sort of failure. After all, if we "passed" each other, we could pass the world?

The woman today quite simply could have been a bible thumping/snake worshiper from nearby Kentucky or rural Ohio.

If she was, I wonder what she would have thought about my female Muslim Doctor?

Maybe I could change my "Trans Dar" to "Arse Dar" with the glaring woman because my doctor for one knew little to nothing about transgender women or men and was very cool.

Trans-u-cation is always good!!!!

It's Back to School Time Around Here

As the kids go back to school in various waves around here, I have been sadly reminded of how life has NOT changed for so many of our LGBTQ youthful sisters and brothers.

I know a 15 year old trans kid who is positively dreading going back to school because of senseless bullying at the hands of class mates. I mean where are the teachers in some of these schools and are the inmates running the asylum?

I know there are bright and shining examples of acceptance here and there, but I know it's tough for parents to get many of their kids into those schools who live in rural Ohio areas. And, even though the parents care deeply for their children it's not possible to find the best alternative to sinking or swimming.

My heart goes to the families.

Kids who are bullies have parents who are bullies and everyone else suffers.

It's Backwards Both Ways

Not such a strange statement to those of you who are dyslexic like I am?

Or, I suppose I could have used "Now You See Me-Now You Don't" as a title for this post on stealth (among) other subjects.

Those of you with a little age may remember the approved way to escape the rigors of the "Jerry Springer Show" and settle down, was to go through the "change" (SRS) and settle down in a different town. Essentially there was no in between - between transvestite and transsexual.

Let's not forget too, the infamous gender slur tra--ny and the use of the term "passing."

I will never forget Stana from Femulate answering a reader who said she couldn't pass with a full explanation of how to do it in a car...hilarious!

Going stealth I guess is the ultimate purge of your male persona.

What would Jerry say?

Pink Miniskirt Part II

Received a couple of key comments on Connie's guest post. One from Shelle:
(excerpt)" As you point out,everyone has their own agenda,For me it has always been to not be noticed anymore than any other woman on earth I have no desire what so ever to be noticed as Trans,I don't view myself in that light,I'm a Woman and always have been even though I didn't for most of my life understand how it came to be."

Shelle, I would guess another version of "stealth" is when you can remove the transgender part of trans woman from your name or self perceptions all together?

And, here is a follow up from Connie:  Hmmm....I never mentioned the color of the fuzzy mini skirt, yet you knew it was pink....

"This is Seattle. There are trans women of all kinds all over the place. I don't actually know many, myself, but it doesn't take a highly-developed trans-dar in order to spot them. A few will say hello to me, in the spirit of "sisterhood", but most of them are so into their thing that they are either oblivious to what's going on around them or they think that talking to another trans woman in public will out them. The latter group is, of course, made up of the stealth ones; the first, mostly cross dressers, I think. There is one who is rather attractive, although she over-does it with her cinched waist and silicone booty. "

It has been just very recently I have began to develop a potential circle of trans/CD acquaintances. I am still learning the Cincinnati area and the fact there are very definite organizations for both groups. As I look back on my cross dressing days, I would not want to hang out in jeans and flats with a bunch of boring trans women.

The "bottom" or "booty" line is, to each their own and  we must stick together for the greater good! 

Guest Post-Fuzzy Pink Miniskirt

From Connie: "

De-transitioning is just an extension of gender dysphoria. It's kind of like the ultimate purge. Of course, most of us know that it really doesn't work in the long run.

Yesterday, while working out on the street all day (no, I did not say "working the street"), I counted no less than a dozen trans women. Most of them were asking to be stared at. I used to actually be embarrassed by these trans folk, knowing that we have some kernel of "truth" in common. Now, I just don't care, because they are taking the focus off of me and making me look good by comparison. They can do what they want with their lives, anyway. We all have our own realities and our own "normal". I believe the frequency of stares we get has diminished quite a bit lately, as more of "us" are showing ourselves to the world. It's like tattoos or bright pink hair - people just don't care anymore. Still, that 6'4" transwoman wearing a fishnet body stocking and fuzzy miniskirt gave cause for a second look, if not a stare"

I need to get out more, I don't think I know a dozen trans women and no I won't lend you my fuzzy miniskirt!

**If you would like to be a guest blogger here, don't be shy!!!!Let me know.

Transgender Teen Fiction Themes

From USA Today:

In May, Meredith Russo’s literary debut arrived in the world, one of countless first novels published every year in search of readers. But Russo’s If I Was Your Girl  — the story of a transgender teenage girl named Amanda who is in love with a boy named Grant — had deep personal resonance.

“I wanted to write the story I needed myself” as a teenager, says Russo, 29, a trans woman inChattanooga, Tenn., who remembers growing up with only negative cultural messages about trans people. “I wanted to create a power fantasy for trans kids.”


There are many more titles, follow the link for more.

If You Are Going to Stare

In a follow up post to my last one...let's move forward to Saturday morning when we were grocery shopping. Normally anymore I don't get much push back from the public from whatever I do. Except Saturday when some pregnant "arse hat" of a women kept doing the side stare at me.

You know, the one who won't look you directly in the eye but can't keep her eyes off you otherwise. I was in a good mood Saturday so I didn't do my usual spin move and catch her at mid glance. Maybe she will teach her kid to not be rude when he or she is born. Oh wait, what if she has a transgender child , will she stare sideways at her/he?

Finally this weekend I saw a couple totally unrelated (to me) posts on FB from so called trans peeps who "couldn't take it any longer" and were contemplating "de-transitioning."

To each their own of course and I know as well as anyone how difficult a Mtf gender transition is but I would be damned if I would anyone take a slice of my life and send me back to where I was.

It's My Life and YOU Can't Have It!

I have a real busy weekend to go over with you kids which is one of the reasons I missed a couple days blogging.

Friday evening Liz and I rushed to our Tarot card reading class for the second time. I have little to no knowledge of the cards and am always petrified about getting embarrassed in a class...specifically when the instructor keeps screwing up my pronouns, which I hate.

Of course I told her I did (hate the he word) and she turned the tables back on me not in an unpleasant way during a trial reading I was doing. The person I was reading for was anticipating a relationship problem and the cards (not me) said use caution. If you believe in Tarot or not is not the basis of this post...the instructor came around and said what would I say if she (instructor) was my sister and I said be very careful. What went unsaid between the three of us was our perception of the high percentage of men who can't be trusted.

At that point she said my dual gendered past was exactly what would make me such an intuitive reader and that is why sometimes she can't get up off the  "he" word with me.



In a quiet moment with her, I will have to explain my thoughts on gender fluidity and aura and maybe we can start all over. Because I don't think necessarily tossing out 50 plus years in the male world is a bad thing. Plus she is a lesbian and I am transgender which often (I have found) is the hardest bridge to cross.

So she can have a sliver of my life to knaw on but in the next post I have a couple others that won't.

Manchester's Transgender Beauty School

Based on Sackville Street in the city's Gay Village, Born UK is an all-encompassing service – from voice training to relationship advice - designed to better the lives of the city’s transgender people. Eyebrow reshaping also plays its part in the process and that’s where wax-specialist Sam Marshall comes in: “I remember seeing Jaimie for the first time and thinking 'Wow she's pretty, who is she?' 

Sam says she’s been enamoured by trans women ever since a part-time trans woman volunteered for a live male waxing tutorial. "Michelle would turn up to the male waxing tutorials as Steve, go in the toilets get changed and come out as Michelle.

For more, go here.

The "Born" Team Trans Women Grace and Kate

Don't Jump into the Deep End Until You Can Swim

Most likely one of the top questions I get is-when/why did I decide to go full time.

At once it is the simplest and most complex answer I give.

First of all, I had to feel comfortable. For me that alone took years. Then that answer leads to another-how did I begin the process of feeling comfortable?

I was in the position to take the process rather slow once I got out of the heels and hose in the mall mode I was in. I give my deceased wife credit for that after she began to call me "pretty,pretty mirror princess."

I began to eat/drink at restaurants and go to safe rather civilized places like book stores etc. What I realized I was slowly building confidence to see if I wanted to live a feminine existence at all and was I indeed transgender and not a cross dresser.

To me the so called "deep end" came when I started HRT. I began the estrogen therapy and almost immediately began to feel the changes, mostly emotional. Plus I gained a group of friends who went a long way in bringing out the woman I am today.

Two in particular pushed me off the gender cliff I was on and into the deep end.

Now, I am so fortunate to call a whole group friends and they were the ones who taught me how to swim more than I can say. I guess in my case it took a village to build a transgender woman.

Back to the advice? I really don't have any (sigh) except to try the world out and be ready for a few bumps and bruises on the way. There isn't a right or wrong way to be transgender.

Ella Grant

From Canada's Edmonton Journal:

"The first time a teacher unintentionally outed then-13 year-old Ella Grant as transgender, it was her second day at Victoria school.

Grade 8 students looking for their desk in French class picked up Popsicle sticks with their names on them. Ella’s stick said “Eliot.”

Despite her family asking Victoria school administrators to keep the new student’s birth name and gender private, the school district’s computer system was unrelenting. Flummoxed teachers kept having mishaps, displaying Ella’s “dead” name on class seating charts, and calling it out during attendance."

For more, go here.

Do You Dream in Gender?

I know when I was growing up I had at least one dream a week in which I was a girl and I didn't want to wake up to the real world of being a boy.

As time went on though, I began to dream as me-most of the time with no respect to either gender.

I know people who say they can dream in color, so I began to wonder about gender and why my gender dreams seemed to fade away the more I MtF transitioned into a 24/7 life as a transgender woman.

I also know there is no real answer to why someone dreams the way they do. Although some peeps make a living out of telling people why. I am learning to read Tarot cards now, maybe I will have to ask the cards!

It's my theory the less stress I put on myself to live the life I have always wanted...maybe I didn't have to dream about it!

Big Sweaty Guys

I don't know where you live, but here every summer we are dominated by the orange barrels, big machinery and men in yellow vests tearing up and replacing roads/highways everywhere.

Yesterday, as I was setting in yet another traffic jam I began thinking of the amount of  reconstruction on my body already without surgery!

Today for example I have to change my estrogen HRT patches out and continue to take my "Spiro" which holds my testosterone to a lower level and yesterday was one of my shampoo days as I come ever closer to another hair coloring.

Sunday, Liz and I were able to do a little shopping and I was able to pick up a couple items for this fall.

So, as any cis woman will tell you just scratches the surface of what it takes to be an attractive woman of any sort.

It's tough, but I don't understand the occasional person I run across on FB who is constantly whining about being a "short fat ugly" guy and a short fat ugly woman. I for one would love to be shorter than my 5'10" and I guess I was fortunate enough (according to him) to have been able to take off nearly 45 pounds.

I look at myself as constantly being in "construction" and will be until my ashes are spread in front of some unknowing plus size clothing store.

One thing is for sure, if you base your life on looks anyhow, you are looking in the wrong mirror.

Her Story

From the "Advocate."

Arguably one of the most important pieces of media created by transgender women, the web series Her Story has been making headlines and garnering praise since its release in 2015.

Earlier this month, the groundbreaking show earned yet another honor: an Emmy nominationin the newly-created category of Outstanding Short Form Comedy or Drama. The award nomination is not only a win for the Her Story's incredible cast and crew. It should also serve as confirmation to the greater creative media community of the importance of transgender voices and faces in the portrayal of trans narratives.

With the commercial and critical success of TV series like Amazon's Transparent and films likeThe Danish Girl, the lives of transgender people have entered mainstream media consciousness. However, the bulk of these trans stories so far are written by and are portrayed by cisgender people. When Her Story premiered in January, it smashed through those paradigms. It stars two talented trans actresses, Jen Richards and Angelica Ross, and was co-written and co-produced by Richards.

The series focuses on the dating lives of two trans women, Violet (Richards) and Paige (Ross).

For more, go here:

Life in the Transgender Lane

Over the years (as I have written) I have not considered myself much of a "girly girly" girl and that's OK. In fact I will accept a hefty dose of gender fluid to describe my life, if I was allowed to.

What I mean was, I don't know totally know what type of woman I would be. ( A tom-boy?)If I followed in my Mom's footsteps, a strong one which doesn't necessarily mean she wasn't a product of her WWII generation. She dressed and looked the part of a school teacher and somewhere along the line I was able to pass the strong woman to my daughter (as she wrote me in my Parents' Day card this year.)

So maybe I did pass along my Mom except for the fashions - which sometimes I wish I had.

I think if I was writing this to myself ten years ago when I was considering jumping off the cliff from my cross dresser period into a MTF 24/7 transgender lifestyle, I would have considered these thoughts.

On one end, the experience has been easier than I expected with more good and caring people I could have ever expected to encounter. And, of course I never would have had I not transitioned.

On the other end though, the experience has been extremely tough and I would never recommend it for the faint of heart. But this week alone I have encountered two younger "no doubters" concerning their transgender status.

So life in the transgender lane was something I really never could avoid to begin with. I just didn't know it!

***As a sidelight, a big congratulations to "D&D" on the their engagement yesterday!!!!!!