On Line Action?

Recently here in Cyrsti's Condo, we have slightly covered the subject of on line dating sites and their availability to transgender women or men. In fact, over the years many have become nothing more than glorified porno sites attracting "admirers" of trans women and/or cross dressers.I have another experience which goes back to the very earliest days of on line chat rooms. But first, here is an experience from Connie:

"Maybe I shouldn't admit this publicly, especially just two weeks away from a 49th anniversary, but I dabbled in dating sites a number of years ago. I labeled myself "woman 'curious' about women," and I never mentioned that I was trans. I did say that I was married, although I was careful to always say "spouse" and never used a pronoun. I was not interested in finding a relationship; I just wanted to see if I could be seen as a woman (or be seen as attractive by another woman). I don't think the term "catfishing" had even been coined yet, but I guess I was sort of doing it. I'm not proud of what I did. There were a couple women who were really interested in meeting me, even though they lived in California. One was ready to buy a plane ticket to Seattle, and I had to be nasty to her just to get her to give up on me. I could have told her the truth of my gender, but that may have been even more hurtful to her at that point (or so I rationalized). I was scared to death, and never fooled around with dating sites again."

Thanks for your comment! Mine as I said goes back to the very earliest days of the AOL chat rooms.  I was married too of course and somehow had managed to establish a fairly regular "chat" with a person attracted to transvestites in a city not so far away. Even I was very naive and continued the chat until my wife walked in on me one day and found out. I remember it took me weeks to dig out of that predicament  I had put myself into. It was almost as bad as when I was caught sending of Polaroid photo of me cooking in the kitchen all cross dressed up to a "friend" who responded with a perfume scented letter. Again, not what your wife wanted to find in the mailbox. Again I had to promise to never go down that road again. 

My problem was technology stayed one step ahead of me and I began to learn how to contact others. Of course, after my wife passed away, I was free to experiment on line and you have been able to see some of the results I had shared. Looking back on the later experiences, I think I was stood up on so called "dates" in restaurants approximately two out of three times by men. 

However I did much better with women whom I met in person and my future was to be much brighter. 

Ever Been "Made Over?"

One of every cross dressers earliest dreams is to have a cis woman make him over. Naturally, because a "real woman" has more expertise. Well, they do, on themselves. Plus they carry years of comments from Mothers, sisters and girlfriends. How could they not know more about the magic of make up?

When it comes to making up a male face, especially one they know well, very few are equipped to do a quality makeover.

I have been made over three times in my life, one in my "ancient" cross dressing days by an ex finance and the other two by make up professionals. One of which was not trying to sell me anything and one that was trying to sell me everything.

The first was in a motel room and achieved the fabulous fantasy I thought it would be, complete with shaved legs and lingerie. How I really looked? Who could say. I can only say our relationship was never the same (no matter what she said) and I could have looked like Bozo the clown's drag sister.

Completely opposite was the makeover I have written about here in Cyrsti's Transgender Condo a number of times. During one of the transvestite mixers I went to, they offered the services of a free makeover by a professional. All you needed was the courage to tuck away your ego in your girdle and do it. I did and could not believe the results! The person looking back at me in the mirror just couldn't have been me-but it was. I looked so good, I turned down a serious hit from a good looking man later that evening.

Finally, the makeover by a professional makeup sales woman was almost as good except she tried to sell me a variable ton of product I didn't need.

The blurry picture to the right is the only picture I have from any of the experiences.

So, when you are looking for a makeover and don't care about your finances, I would go the MaryKay or Avon route. Or even one of the department store counters and/or Mac.

Either way there are plenty of ways to be pampered with your own makeover.

I just don't think the normal spouse/girlfriend is the one to do it.

Transgender and your Bucket

Is your bucket list half empty or half full? Certainly before we all know it and we are fortunate enough to make it- it's time to start looking ahead to the force calling your number. Poof! "You be Gone!"
I started my transgender Bucket List approximately five years ago. I began to see how much living I could do as a woman or maybe I should say- a trans woman.
I found I could live and more importantly wanted to live as my chosen gender. Ironically I got hammered from within the trans community for waiting so long. Even being called just "another old guy on hormones". The big bad outside world on occasion was more accepting.
To make a long story short, my bucket became very full.
Here's my point: I could have made the move to a full time feminine existence two very specific times in my life-basically at the age of 30 and 40 and didn't. If you are younger (I'm 62 now) and considering the move, I can say time will slip by before you know it.
I can't and won't tell anyone to transition but I do recommend checking the waters if you can. It just confuses me when someone writes me or I read somewhere a person is going to try to go through SRS without living the life! It's a problem created by places like Thailand who really don't care about much more than the cash.
Sure it takes quite a bit of courage and a whole lot of trial and error to experience the feminine socialization process.
Don't think you have to be old to have a bucket list. Do think you don't want to be living a regret later in your life when the bucket has a huge hole in it.
I've known fully changed transsexuals and cross dressers justifying life in the closet who have gotten really bitter over the experience.
Certainly, we all have only one life to live and we all have responsibilities to others.
Just as certainly we all have the responsibility to be true to ourselves.  You may consider starting a transgender bucket list to discover what your truth might be.

I Couldn't Help Myself!

Another look at Maria Roman...it's Monika's fault.
Not to be selfish...go here for more!

Behind Door Number 3....

I'm always flattered when somehow I trigger an intellectual response to the gender intensive lives we live.
In a second I will direct you to one such example from Sherri Lynne. 
I  asked her for her ideas on various life forms under the transgender umbrella.
First, a disclaimer/explanation of the evolution of this form known as Cyrsti's Transgender Condo.
Two years ago this whole exercise started as a documentation of my trip down gender lane-nothing more-nothing less. Not surprisingly, I found out a percentage of folks found my stories interesting and of course (more than a few) not so much.
As I started to be a bit of a Reader's Digest of our culture, of course I thought I would add a few of my own thoughts which pretty much brings us to where we are today. Of course I have my passions. Fortunately for all of you, I don't have the inclination or the background to embark on long in depth clinical discussions.
My goal has always been to provide a common look at our culture. Often it is not so easy. Pause for a moment and consider the problem of loosely describing a person's "genderality". Imagine adding transgender, transsexual, gender queer or cross dresser to every person's descriptor which you aren't sure of. Yet, here we are.
Now, I'm going to direct you here to Sherri Lynne for her take on the labels.
I love it when she calls me a muse instead of one that amuses!