Transition within Transition

Image from the Jessie Hart Archives

Along the way down my gender path, I often considered each change to be the final transition I would ever need to suffer through. I was wrong and it turned out a few of my transitions were pleasant, some not so much.

Perhaps I should refer to my many changes more than just transitions within my gender issues. The prime examples I could use are when I needed to break all my home ties out of high school and enroll at an university one hundred miles away or the time I was forced to go away to Ft. Knox to fulfill my military obligations during the Vietnam War. Two major life changing transitions to be sure for my male self. Then there was the human transition I went through when I became a parent for the first time. I remember it as one of the profoundly life changing experiences ever. 

Before you think the only major transitions I went through were on my old male side of life, you would be wrong. I have always considered crossing the binary gender border, is one of the most difficult journeys a human can undertake. My feminine transitions include when early in life I determined I wanted  to do more than just wanting to admire myself in the mirror as a girl, somehow in my dreams I wanted to be a girl. In order to do so, my path ahead became very difficult. Initially, the mirror was very kind to me and the world much more scary to negotiate. 

Plus, there was always the question of how my strongly entrenched male self would react to all the gender changes I wanted to go through. In many ways, he was allied with my wife against the survival of my inner feminine self. Both of them strongly wanted him to survive not her. Secretly, she won out as she continued to transition herself when she took advantage of the times she had to be in the public's eye. It wasn't so long after she started her public explorations, she decided she wasn't a cross dresser at all but fit into the newly adopted and publicized transgender category. Her long standing dream of living a feminine life as a trans woman was coming closer. At the same time, my true self was exploring the world's reaction to her by meeting new people at parties and mixers and learning how to communicate with them mostly woman to woman because very few men would have anything to do with me. Forcing me to develop myself more completely as a new person at least on the feminine side. I still had plenty of questions to answer. Was I gay? Was I a trans-lesbian? So much to learn.  

In the midst of all this new life skill I was learning, it seemed at times, enough was enough and I had achieved most of my goal. Of course I learned enough was never enough and there were always new discoveries in life to make. It at times was not easy when I was bounced out of restrooms or even entire venues for simply being trans. Ironically, one of the managers who made me leave his venue one night got fired and the crew found me in a neighboring venue and invited me back. I had my revenge. The manager was wrong because all I was doing was minding my own business, spending good money and tipping well.

Looking ahead, which I do quite a bit at my advanced age, I see many more transitions ahead. Some are as big as they come. Transitions such as elderly life care and even my final transition (death) are now real possibilities. 

When it all comes, it will just be another transition within a transition. I have managed to survive to this point and at times had a good time doing it.

   

Is the Cat Out of the Bag?

All of a sudden it seems more and more people know of/a transgender woman or man. The tipping point it's called.

As more of the world knows the truth about us, that we are not the restroom rapists we are drawn to be, will the bully on the other side of the teeter totter take off running?

As you have probably have read, Mississippi is the latest state to legislate the worst legislation against the LGBT community yet. Then again, it's tough to expect much more from a state with a Confederate Flag incorporated in it's flag.

As I understand it, Mississippi's law even dictates an employer can impose a dress code. Does that mean a genetic woman can't wear pants to work?

With all this activity I thought it may be a good idea to see where your state stacks up.

Plus there are states like Kentucky where anti LGBT bills have ground to a halt in session, and Georgia has not been up dated on this map.

It's important to note too, how much impact all of us can have one on one with the world. Especially with our dollars. In fact, yesterday I emailed Asheville, NorthCarolina (billed as one of the most liberal towns in North Carolina) that I had taken them off our possible vacation plans. 

I will let you know if I receive a message!

Coincidence or Divine Intervention?

If you follow sports at all, you will know last night was the finale of the NCAA men's basketball tournament. The two teams were Villanova (small Catholic school from Philadelphia) and North Carolina.

Normally, I am not the biggest fan of basketball and really didn't have a dog in this hunt, until North Carolina pretty much slipped in under the cover of darkness to legislate the most nefarious anti LGBT laws in the country.

As the game went back and forth, I began to think what if North Carolina lost because their coach is a jerk and the state won't let me potty where I want to.

Then my prayers were answered when Villanova drove down the court and shot an improbable three point shot to win the National Championship at the buzzer. (End of the game.)

For the next couple of minutes, I became a Catholic.

Jur-ass-ic Park and Transgender Americans?

I often used to wonder where (or if) the cut off point in age was for gender bias I encounter. The great majority of the very young kids I see-see me at the least as a curiosity and most have no reaction at all. The world is getting better---but---at the same time, what the hell is up with the lack of LGBTQ protections under law? And, dare I mention (with yet another U.S. Veterans Day around the corner, we mark another year of  U.S. active trans military members not being allowed to openly serve.

By "Jur-ass-ic" Park I mean, the group of Dinosaur Americans I am most likely to run into problems with. Three times out of four (a number derived from my very unscientific experiment) the majority of stares and glares I receive anymore are from women close to my age. (66) Not all mind you, because many of my friends are "more mature" women too and have opened their hearts and warmth to me more than they can ever know.

So, I don't know. Transgender "Cloud Nine" looks pretty dreamy at times, until I saw an old fat red neck in Texas protesting "No Men in the Womens Room" on his T-shirt, or Good Ol' Boy Rick from Pawn Stars, who essentially has said the same thing. Somewhere along along the line it's sad but the definition of conservative has been intermingled with ignorance these days. One can be conservative if you bother to bring the right set of facts to the table. (Example of course are the rest room 'wars')

At any rate, I have a tendency to think the "Jur-Ass-ic" crowd will go the way of the other "big-ot-suars" over the coming years. Especially when I read stories like this: "Reform Jews poised to pass Transgender Resolution."

For sure, parents call the shots here and they are the ones who do or don't line up to buy tickets to these parks.

You can tell it in their kids.

Wow!!!!

Our Cyrsti's Condo "News Correspondent Bobbie"  just sent this along.  It's from Mother Jones:

President Obama is planning on signing a new executive order preventing federal contractors from discriminating against LGBT employees, a White House official told the Associated Press on Monday. The order is expected to be finalized in the next few weeks and is an extension of previous orders banning employment discrimination on the basis of race, sex, religion, or national origin among federal contractors and subcontractors.

"The protections will reach over one million LGBT workers across the country, making it the single largest expansion of LGBT workplace protections in our country's history," ThinkProgress reports.

The White House official would not say when Obama plans to sign the order, but confirmed that the president told his staff to prepare a measure for his signature. On Tuesday, the president will travel to New York for an LGBT fundraising gala with the Democratic National Committee.

Monday's announcement comes after years of pressure from gay rights groups calling for broader action on the issue. Last November, the Senate passed legislation banning workplace discrimination against LGBT workers, but the bill has since gone nowhere in the House.

Gee, I can't believe it went nowhere in the house...just like here in Ohio where the house Republicans are pro discrimination!

Thanks Bobbie!!!