Showing posts with label homophobia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homophobia. Show all posts

Sunday, January 14, 2024

Supporting Casts

 Recently I wrote a post concerning (among other things) the power of having cis-gender women friends to help your transgender transition along at key times. If you are similar to me, you started your gender journey in the mirror and dreamed of the day when I could enlist another more experienced woman's aid with my wardrobe and makeup. 

In response, I received this comment from "Anonymous" : " It’s nice to see the positive side, the genuine sense of joy in transition. I know I have felt euphoria as I have gained the confidence to comfortably present myself authentically to the outside world. It’s interesting that you mention feeling more comfortable in the company of women. That has been my experience. I am not attracted to men physically. Frankly, I prefer women as friends or if given the opportunity, as intimate partners." 

Thanks for the comment! 

For some reason, during my life I have always felt more comfortable around women, even though there were very few girls in the neighborhood I grew up in. In order to survive, I needed to develop strong masculine tendencies to basically keep the bullies away. Even though I was successful, I still for whatever reason, never really had many close male friends Maybe, it was a result of my inner feminine self. Or an overreaction to thinking I maybe gay. My own inner form of homophobia. In later years I wondered if the fear of my own sexuality would carry over into my own inner transphobia. Essentially when I feared what would happen if I went too far into living as a fulltime transgender woman. 

In passing the other day, I mentioned certain early cross dressers or transvestites' who were seemingly using cigars to back up their reliance on so called male stereotypes. to which I received this partial comment from Georgette who happens to still smoke cigars, even though she has transitioned:

" Why do so many people break everything down to a Masculine or Feminine thing, I get a laugh or no response from many part-time CD/TV that will say that they still enjoy all those "Manly" things, I started smoking cigars in my teen years and still do. It is a world of difference from smoking in general."

Thanks to you Georgette  for the comment!  I think too many people over-simplify the masculine and feminine thing. Including me. Sometimes I get lazy when I write and get ahead of myself. On the other hand, describing the differences between the two main binary genders becomes very tedious for me. As far as cigars go, they were part of my life when I needed to out macho another man, or at least connect with him. Before I transitioned and grew away from them, a good cigar was a priority of me so I understand where Georgette is coming from in her comment. 

As far as comments go, I always invite any of you to participate in the blog by commenting and I will try to add in your input when I can, Sometimes it is applicable, sometimes not. The same way I felt I couldn't use the makeup advice I was given very early on when I was a novice crossdresser. If the truth be known, I probably had more experience with makeup than some of the women I was with. Later on was when I discovered how much I could learn from the women around me about really being women. As Georgette said going much farther than simply breaking down life to a masculine versus feminine existence. 

It took me awhile to finally learn my second wife was trying to tell me the same thing when she said I made a terrible woman. Perhaps my problem was I was making a terrible person to begin with. It took the emergence of my inner female to recognize the difference with the help of a strong supporting cast.  

Saturday, October 28, 2023

Forces of Nature

Image from the Jessie Hart

 As we go through life as transgender women or trans men, we just have to develop a hard shell of sorts to get us by.

Sadly, we often have to resort to hiding and sneaking around our family's back to at the least keep our gender dysphoria issues at bay. At least in my case, even though I wasn't proud of it, I spent hours or even days trying to figure out how I could do my cross dressing. Even to the point I wish I could get back just a portion of the creative energy I expended on dressing like a girl. Obviously, it is way too late now to worry over expended energy as the entire process made me stronger.

Little did I know, I would need all of the strength I could summon to make it through my upcoming long and twisted gender journey. Along the way, I needed to survive all the unkind external forces I would end up facing. Before I grasped the importance of learning how to cross dress my male body to blend into the world. Possibly the biggest lesson I needed to learn was cis-women ran the world I wanted to be a part of. Without the women's help and approval, there would be no way I would be allowed to play in their sandbox, as I like to refer to it as. 

To be a force of nature, I needed to learn to be a gentle force. In other words I needed to play off my gender differences. I could never try to claim my womanhood the same way my friends did but I could claim my right to admittance to being a woman because I had always felt deep down I had always felt feminine. All the way to the point I had always been a student of everything feminine. I paid my own dues in so many ways to finally pave my path to my trans womanhood. One of the most amazing parts of my journey came when I was chosen to be a part of a photo shoot here in Cincinnati which featured all sorts of different kinds of women. 

Being a force of nature is often a burden also. On occasion I think people expect too much from transgender women or trans men. For the same reason we are feared in some circles these days, other people want to hate on us as a community. Mainly because they don't understand our lifestyle. It is especially evident to me when it comes to certain politicians I have recently seen. Primarily when my "gay-dar" immediately went off when I saw the new Speaker of the House who has repeatedly issued homophobic comments. 

All in all, it takes every bit of knowledge we trans people have acquired to make it in a world hostile to us. In a climate where certain political parties and religions are trying to erase us, the fact remains we have always been here and always will. 

Rest assured, we are true transgender forces of nature. Trained to do our best to survive as a tribe and never go back. 

Friday, September 13, 2013

How "ya" Like Us Now?

It seems daily there is more and more "coming out" news from the transgender world.
The first today comes through the "Huffington Post" Parent's Site and features a MtF transgender parent's story on coming out to her 10 year old son as well as others:

And then from Russia is Masha Bast (right) who is used to facing formidable tasks. As the chairwoman for the Association of Russian Lawyers for Human Rights, Bast has worked on some of the most high-profile and politically sensitive cases in the country. Only recently, with those cases having come to an end Bolotnaya has she found time to fully embrace another, deeply personal project: living her life as a woman. With the past and current wave of homo and transphobia in Russia, Masha most certainly is courageous at the least with her public transgender stance!

Read more here.

How encouraging is it that so many are stepping up and out of their closets to lend their lives to make our future better.

Sink or Swim

Image from Trans Wellness Event.  Jessie Hart Archives.  Many times when I first entered the world as a new cross dresser or femininized mal...