Trans Acceptance

 

Liz on Left, Daughter on Right.

Today, my wife Liz and I are heading north to Dayton, Ohio for a family birthday party. The party is for my youngest grandson and my daughter's father in law. 

The get together of my daughter's extended family has always been a different experience for me, as a man or a woman. Per norm, my visits as a man were ego driven with battles with my son in law in particular. They were nothing as compared with any other macho activities I faced with the family.

When I completed my male to female gender transition, I wondered how I would be accepted. If at all. It turned out as my daughter led the way, the rest of the family followed. As most of you regular readers know, my kid was wonderfully supportive from the very beginning. However, as her family expanded to three grandkids for me, what would they think of my gender issues. Spoiler alert, all three took my transition in stride and my oldest grandkid even came out as transgender before "they" left high school. They (chosen pronouns) were always leaning that way, so I was not really surprised.    

As time and events went by, my feminine self was still chosen to stand up in front of a temple and actively participate in one of the bar mitzfah ceremonies since my daughter converted over to the Jewish faith. Her decision led me to a whole other level of acceptance I never knew existed. From the Rabbi, to cousins I never knew before, I was accepted as an equal person. No one cared.

Now when we make the hour trip to the birthday party, I have nothing but good feelings. At the least, transgender acceptance as a person helps my gender euphoria, at it's best I get to see my trans grandchild again. Plus, I get to moderately dress up for my first wife who usually attends as she is the mother of my daughter. Recently she gave me a complement which literally left me speechless. She mentioned how good I looked and how far I had come along. Now I feel bad, I couldn't come back with anything else than a mumbled thank you. She went way back with me to the Army and she knew I was a cross dresser before we got married.

Since now I am close to the oldest person in the room, never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would ever become a matriarch.   

On the Road

 

As I mentioned, today is my youngest grandson's birthday (13th). Also, due to our new diet, we will be packing our own sugar and flour free lunch. Obviously too, we will not be partaking in any of the birthday cake or ice cream. Sooner more than later I will have to run around in the shower to get wet.

As I try in this post to try to tie up some loose ends, here is a comment/question from Connie:

" There's no doubt that trans people can be as rude as anyone else. Was the quote said directly from the DJ, or was the T word just added by the accuser to up the ante? Not only can anyone be rude, anyone, including trans people, can be too easily offended, sometimes. I probably would never return to a place where I was called the T word, but I would apologize if what I had done was thought to be rude. I hope that there isn't a blow-up over it all."

To clarify, the guy has never come close enough to me to use the "T" word. So, I took for granted what I heard was second hand and by an individual who over the years (literally)  has seemingly done her best to snub the group, 

After all, transgender people are no different than the rest of the population, Some are good folk, some not so much.

The person involved in the whole event supposedly, has never gotten back with me. For all I know, the DJ denied ever saying it or even apologized.  

Surprise!

Yesterday was actually my 70th birthday. I thought I managed to keep it relatively undercover with just my partner Liz, daughter Andrea, and a few other friends knowing at all.

After choosing where I wanted to go for my birthday dinner out, we headed out. It was chilly enough for one of my lightweight sweaters and leggings.

As we went towards the restaurant I picked, even I figured out we were going the wrong way. I am still fairly new to driving around here and Liz knows all the short cuts, so I trusted her to get us there and I would soon be eating creole cooking soon,

No such luck. We seemingly drove forever before I figured out my birthday venue was going to be denied. I was more than a little upset as we entered this little off the beaten track brew pub. Then I realized I had been scammed. Sitting around a big table was my daughter, grand kids and son in law. I couldn't believe they were able to trick me so completely. At least it was for a good cause.

The beer and food was good. Then came the gifts.

I was given a necklace with my daughter and I's birthstone and the best present of them all...an T-shirt which said "Ohio State University Grandmother." OK, I couldn't help but cry. That simple shirt meant so much to me on so many levels.

Of course, my Granddaughter is a freshman at The Ohio State University (which I am a HUGE fan) and to have the word Grandmother attached was just too much to bear.

So all in all, I had a wonderful birthday. Even though it was a complete surprise!

Time Flies When You are Writing a Blog!

I suppose it is not as bad when you miss one of your own anniversaries.

Time is going by so fast I missed the June 1, 2010 anniversary of Cyrsti's Condo! Little did I know where this effort would end up. Back then I barely knew what a blog was.

As I look back, I'm amazed at the changes we have been through together! I always have been humbled and flattered that all of you take the time to stop by.

As part of a belated birthday look at the past, I'm presenting of the original posts- which feels like a lifetime ago:


"Here is one of the stories I sent to a friend and she thought I should share so...Here" ya" go! Direct from alternate life style redneck bars , two stellar tales...of me being me. The first establishment basically was a female biker bar, not hardcore outlaw women, but a serious crew none the less. The best way I can describe the place was I got the juke box turned off one night when I played Shania Twane "Lord I feel like a Woman." No sense of humor...kind of like the urinal that was made into a planter. The best pick up line I heard was "you don't look half bad. Maybe I should take you with me and we can see what kind of time we could have." YAHOO. Me thinks that could have hurt! Back in those days my wife was still alive and I had to be home around midnight. She got off about that time and I had to be presentable with all signs of makeup gone. Believe me, no amount of jabbering would have saved my place in the house when I told her I was abducted by an alien lesbian.

A kinder and gentler lesbian bar also operated on the same side of town. I made friends there that I'm in touch with today. (5 years later) One night karaoke was the entertainment. Here she comes...burr haircut, cowboy hat and weighing in at a conservative 250. I'm in long blond hair, tight jeans and boots. It occurred to me quickly... it may be about time I started sharpening up my non existent singing skills. She did ask me to sing, she TOLD me to pick out a song. I thought "is this the way they treat girls in Texas?" I opted for the only song my male self destroyed after many beers...the romantic ballad "You don't have to call me Darling, Darling. You don't even call me by my name." David Allan Coe if you're familiar.(I think he wrote it in jail?) After we made sweet music (ha) she said "your voice is as low as mine!" I felt as if I was in a "Lola" song remake, just all twisted up. In this version, I was the guy and she was Lola. Well, I kind of was the guy and she was kind of the girl but backward... when and if she put me on her knee. I thought maybe I could outrun her if I took my boots off!

We parted friends (thank god!) and I don't truly know if she guessed my gender. I had never seen her before or after! Unfortunately all the pure lesbian bars are closed now in the area. How sad. I miss drinking free. But more importantly, I won't get to try out one of my top fantasies...female strippers in a lesbian bar! Dammit! Mo MO MO! as Billy Idol would say coming up!"

Billy was right, there was a freight car full of Mo,Mo,MO! coming up and hopefully there is much MO to come!

Happy Fourth!

Another birthday for our great country!
Yes, plenty of problems yet still reasons to be optimistic.
Great is a big term like never or always.  Then again, maybe not. After all the Cincinnati Reds "Big Red Machine" team in the 70's was great. Didn't win them all but finished on top.
Bottom line is that if we as a country are still in the game we have a chance of winning it all!
The problem is along with all the fireworks, heat and picnics most people have a vastly different idea of what "winning it all" is all about.
Not as easy as the Red's and the Red Sox in the world series!
Here's hoping you can enjoy and burger and a beverage with friends today!