Cyrsti in Wonderland.

Very few humans have a chance to reinvent themselves-legally of course.
Now it seems for whatever reason, I may have that chance.
I'm not taking any credit. In fact if it wasn't for more than a couple very understanding friends and a family member like my daughter (and another who I consider family) there is no way I would have made it here.

I am a believer in being at the right place at the right time but not in blind luck. Luck is putting yourself in a position to take advantage of a situation.
But, on the other hand as you probably know by now I'm also a huge believer in Karma. Sooner more than later life has giveth and taketh away for me. I went through the dark years of no transgender information at all to tons of it now. Plus, when I was growing up it's possible I could have been arrested for even dressing as a girl in public. Now I pretty much have my own regular mainstream spots I'm accepted in. I could go on and on with examples.

Now the sky is the limit. I still have to get my ears pierced before the summer but past that I'm thinking of picking up yoga and even belly dancing. In other words, I'm really starting to embrace this reinvention idea.

I think the biggest problem with doing all of this later in life is the subconscious idea I can't do it somehow. Of course we all know the first sign of failure is thinking you can't do something. Anyway you cut it, living 50 years fighting my gender issues with every fiber of my being is tough to change. We've talked about the practice of muscle memory here in Cyrsti's Condo. My challenge now is to embrace every challenge coming and think yes I can do that!

So this reinvention thing I think an invention in itself (give that some thought) The end result is I'm just being me. On the other hand this whole idea just fires up my imagination.

Maybe I should start a short story called "Cyrsti in Wonderland"? Nah! I have nothing to wear!

Will the Circle be Unbroken?

Recently, I re encountered one of my protagonists in a place I go to quite a bit for a drink.
He is middle aged and is one of those guys who comes off as just too smooth. Worse yet, when you see beneath the veneer there is structural damage.
Over the year or so that he has been coming there when I have, he has always made the point of seeking me out and always manages to come up with some sort of snide comment concerning my gender presentation. About the time I get mad enough to really rock his world, he seems to sense it and scurries away.
The visit was quite the eye opener for me anyhow because no one seemed to know who I was with my new hair. The significance of the experience was not lost on me since once again I had gone full circle. I actually have been going there for approximately 6 years. My wife and I actually went several times before she passed away and I continued to go back as a girl until the present. For most of the crew and all of the regulars not to know me was huge.
Back to my buddy.  He circled me a couple times on his way to the bar's lottery machine. Finally he slithered up and said "I finally recognized you over here-looking all normal and that." Well, I guess that's a compliment?
Often I have thought about saying "pull up a seat, let's talk." If I thought it would do any good I would try to explain I never was just a guy getting dressed up as a girl to come out and socialize. Did he understand what female hormones are and that I have been on them for most of the year now and OH Gee- I neglected to mention I have been growing my hair for a year and that is what he is seeing. The bottom line is I don't like or respect him enough to waste my time.
Finally, I know the normal he saw is finally the real me and it's only the beginning.