The Definitive Guide to---Us?

"Us" is similar to "they." The faceless minions in the world, not in the new movie.

If you use "us" as in the TGLBQ community, it's a serious deal especially to civilians. After all in a previous recent Cyrsti's Condo post, Connie and I discussed using the "she" pronoun at all when referring to Zoey Tur.

Perhaps you remember the Simmons College "SocialWork@Simmons" Blog we participated with here in the blog. Now Simmons is passing along a "Gender and Sexuality - Defining Terms for Everyday Use."

Here is the intro:  "Navigating the dialogue that surrounds gender and sexuality can be difficult. The terminology used by and for individuals along the gender spectrum is specific, and preferred usage can vary from individual to individual. Consider the acronym LGBT, which stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender. It’s used all the time in phrases like “LGBT community” and “LGBT rights.” Yet, some people and groups include a “Q” in the acronym to stand for questioning, while others include an “I” to stand for intersex. The language is adaptable and it is always evolving."

Since it is incredibly complex for "us" I can only imagine how confusing it is for "them."

Thanks for checking in Megan (on my email) and Chris for his work on the blog. Follow the link for an in depth look. 

Perhaps of all the terminology, "evolving" is the most profound.

Success!!!

Last night was the first of what I hope are many Trans*forming the Dialogue sessions hosted by Simmons College on Twitter. The hour went by way too fast!

First of all, consider this: Simmons is only the third US women’s college to accept students who identify as transgender. Perhaps you have read recently of more than a few transgender women who have struggled to be accepted number one as a woman and into other "all women's" colleges. Good for you Simmons!!!!



Here is another link for you to check out which includes everything from the Twitter Dialogue I have mentioned here in Cyrsti's Condo, to LGBT Pride Celebrations to guest posts.

My only critique of last night is - the participants represented a variety of important transgender subjects. In fact, maybe too many for the time allotted. I know, even my "know it all self" was surprised and I hope the organizers were too- pleasantly.

One way or another Simmons, I am giving you an "A"!!!!

Trans*forming the Dialogue

Tonight, if you on Twitter at all, I am going to try to participate in the Simmons College chat. You can register here.  and jump right in I think!!!!

#TransDialogue Tweet Chat: 
Date: Tuesday, June 23rd
Time: 8 pm Eastern Time

It's Pride Season!

Around here at least, starting last weekend, you could/can attend a LGBTQ Pride Celebration every weekend through July. "Pride" of course can mean so many different things to so many different people. Simply put, the Pride days are to show the world who we are and we aren't going away. (No matter what the bigots hope for.-Alex.)

Trans Pride Flag

Personally, Pride has represented a deeper transition for me. Over the past five years, I was able to distance myself from the Queens on the floats (and some of the more flamboyant cross dressers I saw)-until last year I was able to completely let my "Trans Flag Fly." No I wasn't a gay man or a lesbian woman, I was me dammit. Quite liberating to say the least - but still easier said than done.

This year, I think the Pride I will be attending is Cincinnati's. Last year I went to Columbus and Yellow Springs, Ohio. I will be very interested in seeing any new/out transgender participation. Plus on the selfish side, I feel as if the less I am noticed the better(stealth?)

Finally, in my next post I am going to be sending along a graphic from the SocialWork@Simmons blog

I will point out ahead of time, it is a partial list!!!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Kerplunk! Another edition of our Sunday edition is hitting your virtual front porch. Here in Ohio we are going through another couple rather chilly days. Yesterday was only 69 (Fahrenheit) here where I am. During my pre HRT days I would relished this kind of weather but not so much now as I reach for my nearest long sleeve shirt. So, the "Joe" (coffee) is of the hot style this morning-let's get started.

Page 1.- The Week that Was -or Wasn't: On the heels of the Trans Ohio Symposium and the Caitlin Jenner reveal we basically had a week to step back and reflect on what had happened. In a sense, Jenner to me was a "be careful of what you hope for moment." For years I have struggled to educate any and all of the public I encountered. Then BOOM - they got educated all right or in some senses all wrong. But you know, I am not complaining. I just think it is diligent to remind "civilians" Caitlin Jenner has been blessed with transgender privilege most of us could ever dream of. Bottom line is though-no sour grapes here. I will take Caitlin's splash of  public relations and run with it. Not far though. I am not a jogger/runner and I am sure it won't take long for her epic publicity machine to crank out more publicity. Rumor has it, if you want to book Caitlin in for a speaking engagement, you can for a "mere" 100 grand. (100,000 dollars)

Page 2.- Transgender Ally's Are Alive and Well. At least they were-in force-at the Trans Ohio Symposium this year. It was cool, they wanted to know what made us tick in some ways and wanted to reach out to us in others. After all, we were their closeted next door neighbors for years and sadly often the ones who tried and succeeded at suicide. Just as sad to me were the nearly total lack of trans women who were willing to give back. Then again, our trans hope lies in our future and there were several very visible examples of the different types of our youth. If you remember the overall surprise when Facebook came out with their new gender choices, at Trans Ohio you saw why. They use them. Binary's were out for the weekend.

Page 3.- Trans*forming the Dialogue: Recently Simmons College announced an initiative to open yet another line of communication for the transgender world: (In their own words)

 "Trans*forming the Dialogue is a blog carnival and social campaign aimed at raising the voices of those within the transgender community. We are asking bloggers and social advocates alike to offer their perspective on how we can foster a more progressive and productive dialogue about trans*lives."

I encourage all of you to check it out and participate! To take a look, go here.

Page 4.- The Back Page: Thanks so much for taking your precious time to stop by Cyrsti's Condo. It has always meant the world to me. Have a great week and if the Goddess is willing, we will do it again next week!!!

Trans*forming The Dialogue Goes Live!

if your memory is even slightly better than mine, you may remember before the Caitlin Jenner binge-Cyrsti's Condo was chosen as one of the "gateway" blogs (by Simmons College) . Here you go:


SocialWork@Simmons is proud to announce the launch of: Trans*forming the Dialogue! In honor of LGBT Pride Month  and in an effort to continue to celebrate Simmons’ College commitment to fostering inclusivity and social advocacy, we are excited to promote this powerful message. We invite you to participate in our campaign and ensure that your voice is heard!

Follow the link above for more right now and most certainly we will have more to come from our end! 

This evening I did leave a comment praising the timing of Simmons' blog because I believe the Jenner "outing" is giving too much "warm and fuzzies" and not enough "reality" of the trans experience.

Taking the Transition Out of Transgender?

Shelle Iles

To

Ms. Cyrsti Hart

Today at 4:16 PM

I thought I would pass this along to you in hopes you could give it your thoughts in your blog.

Lately, I have stopped using the t-word with respect to people who are transgender. The t-word I have stopped using is not the pejorative that might come to mind. It is the word transition. For much of my eight years of teaching about what it means to be transgender, I was inadvertently teaching something I have come to understand creates a different understanding than the one I was trying to create. I talked about my transition. It made sense to me at the time. Today, I have come to know that I did not transition. I certainly did not go from being male to being female. I simply began to uncover the female who had been there all the time.

First-Shelle lles, (above)  thanks for your thoughts and I am going to break down certain excerpts to comment on and show to everyone here in Cyrsti's Condo. 

Dropping the "transition" term does make all the sense in the world and actually easier to explain once you get someone's attention. Gender is simply what the world sees and the world never saw the true me-until now. No transition to it and possibly another great subject to bring up in June to Simmons College.  Back to Shelle lles:

"Transition involves going from one thing, to something different. Psychologically, in spite of the intended meaning, this is processed as going from male to female. The word says one thing, but the mind hears something totally different. The idea that I have gone from male to female is psychologically reinforced, and no one actually realizes what just happened.

My "transition" was a transition of presentation. It was not a transition of identity. Yes, I did have medical intervention, but that is not necessarily part of the transgender experience. Taking hormones and having surgery did not make me more of a woman. They did not transition me."

I TOTALLY agree with Shelle lles last paragraph (and have for a long time!)

Last but not least:

"Transition? No, I didn't do that. I simply stepped off a stage, leaving behind a costume that never fit, and revealed my authentic self to the world. I revealed my previously hidden truth. That's a better word. Truth. Now, there's a t-word I can get behind."

Shelle

As I wrote earlier, there is more substance to the comment she sent me which we will get to later!!!! Also, to visit her blog-go here!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Ker Plunk! Good morning and another Sunday Edition of the Cyrsti's Condo has hit your virtual front porch! Our weather here in O-H-I-O is slightly overcast and muggy so summer is definitely on the way -so last get started!

Page One.- The Week that Was - or Wasn't:  During the past seven days or so, again we seem to be slowing down a bit from the barrage of publicity stemming from Bruce Jenner. My opinion has always been Jenner, Zoey Tur and the rest of the Hollywood crowd which show up on my doorstep on television are just a little too slippery for my liking. I have been surprised though how many civilians I have interacted with who don't think that way. So, that is what is most important. As it turns out, most of my week came from surprise input from the outside.

Page Two.-Back to College? I was completely surprised last week when Megan from Simmons College contacted me concerning contributing to their Trans*forming the Dialogue initiative this summer. First and foremost this means all of you will have a chance to contribute to questions such as what is OK to ask a transgender person or not. It is supposed to go live sometime in June. Plus, a little about Simmons College. Simmons is ONLY the third US women’s college to accept students who identify as transgender. Each time the gender barrier is broken down for transgender women anywhere it is huge. In the recent past, certain "women only" colleges have led the discrimination charge to bar us. I'm sure another question to add to their dialogue would be "what constitutes a woman?" It should be very interesting and you all will be the first to know when I learn more!

Page Three.- My Sisters in? : Page Two Continued: What does constitute a "woman"? How close or how far away are we transgender women from our generic sisters? The easy answer is there isn't one. The easy answer used by radical feminists is if you weren't born with a vagina, then you will never ever be a woman. Then there are the ever present radical transsexuals who believe somehow if you haven't or can't buy your own vagina-you too are the outside looking in. Then again (as always) there is a huge middle ground. The problem is it is an emotionally charged issue to be sure. But last week I took three ideas from Ginger Burr's Total Image Consultant's site which to me spoke deeply to my life as a transgender woman. Here is the post very simply called "Good Questions."

Page Four.- The Back Page: Well kids, it's time to go. somehow my old dog knows she has time for a walk mixed into her busy day. Sadly, the week to come will mark the end of another icon of my generation-the retirement of "David Letterman." I'm sure I will end up blaming and cussing the effect of my HRT hormones as I view the last show.
On a positive note though-have a GREAT week and thanks for stopping by Cyrsti's Condo!

The Big Three

First of all, I (Cyrsti) am participating in Trans*forming the Dialogue, Simmons College’s Online MSW Program’s campaign to promote an educational conversation about the transgender community. By participating in this campaign, I will be offering my perspective on what TO ask and what NOT to ask trans*people.

Unfortunately, these are all too easy to answer. Lets go into the NO questions:

Do Not ask a trans person about their sexual preference!!!! Number one sexulaty and gender are two different issues and

It's none of your business!!! As a point of reference, I have been asked about my gender preferences in a Doctor's office by male interns.

Do not ask me "how long have I been doing this" or "when did I know?"  As innocent as the question may seem,  Being transgender is not a choice. We were born this way.

Do Not Ask Me Have I had any surgeries? How could that possibly matter?

Do Not ask me how I became "so brave" to do this? Bravery is for first responders and military members, I am just doing what I had to do - to live
Do Not Ask Me: How it feels to be a woman. I only know how it feels to be me. It is you who are laying a gender "sticker" on me. Gender is only a mirror and I am showing you the reflection of the gender I want you to see.

Now- Do Ask Me:

What do I think of all the Transgender Dialogue these days?  I welcome any informal "educational" opportunities. Plus, people are seeing so much of us on television, they are curious to meet one of us "in person."

Is Society Changing? Yes, and it's always easy for me to explain why. 

About problems Transgender people of all types face in today's world as they transition. It's always amazing to me about how more people I meet who know or have a gender nonconforming person they know or in their family.

**Please note- this will be a continuing dialogue you all can participate in the very near future.  

Trans*forming the Dialogue!

 May 14 at 10:59 AM

Dear Cyrsti,

First and foremost I want to thank you for the incredible work you do for the transgender/gender non-conforming community. By sharing your story on Cyrsti's Condo, you are helping inspire countless others to find their voice and embrace their true identity.

I’m the marketing coordinator for Simmons College, the third US women’s college to accept students who identify as transgender. I am reaching out because we are embarking on an exciting initiative that aims to educate the masses on trans*lives.

This spring, we are launching Trans*forming the Dialogue. A campaign designed to shift the conversation away from the problematic questions that are often asked of the members transgender community and foster a more progressive dialogue. We are inviting bloggers like yourself to be a featured voice in this campaign.

Meghan

Of course (as I told Meghan) I was humbled and flattered to be considered for this project and of course I would participate!!!

The first three questions will be addressed in the next post.