Cyrsti's Condo "Gossip Corner"

I'm the first to admit, when a transgender or transsexual woman has been rumored to be "seeing" a sexy starlet's man, I do more than just pay passing attention to the Hollywood "babble"machine.


Not long ago J-Lo (Jennifer Lopez) was in the news because of her boyfriend's (Casper Smart) alleged hookup with Xristina Marie, shown on the left.

Now, there is former Playboy Model Kendra Wilkinson's hubby being hooked up with transsexual model Ava Sabrina London.  (Shown below.)

Like anybody else, I get bored with watching an endless stream of reality shows featuring tough redneck truckers or impossibly old "mountain men" - so a few "impossibly" sexy transgender women and their "supposed" exploits in the dating world does add some spice to my television.

I mean, don't we really think sooner more than later most all of these beautiful Hollywood marriages will break up?

My only point has always been when I see the genetic women on the daytime talk shows not so coyly pick on just the men involved, I just want to hear head bitch Jennie Garth say, hmmmn, has J-Low lost it in the sack?

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

"When you feel that rope getting a little tighter around your neck...make sure it matches the rest of your outfit!"

A "blast" from my past!

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Our feature cover today is an interesting pose from the androgynous male model Alexander Chernov. 

The Price of Trans Jade

I received this comment back from Grant, an  Equality Ohio organizer:

(Cyrsti) My first visit here to your condo, and all I've got to say is: yes yes yes. It's easy to get jaded since we've been working for YEARS on a nondiscrimination bill. Marriage isn't the end-all-be-all, especially for trans rights. I like the letter you sent Boehner.

I feel like we have the strongest shot our community has ever had this year. We're organized - and organizing - so smartly lately.

Thanks for linking to EO too :)

Thanks to you Grant and EO!

AND! Thanks for mentioning Trans Rights!

I think we transgender women and men face several obstacles when we summon up the courage to face the light of day in society at all and then attempt to have our voices heard against injustice.  At meetings such as the Equality Ohio affair, at the least I feel the need to offer some explanation of how I live.  It's become a good life for me but I don't labor under any ridiculous idea it's good for all the world.  It never fails though at least one or two peeps at these meetings linger to talk to me, which is cool because education is never bad.  I was flattered the one person who talked to me the longest was the pastor of the church whose congregation was struggling with it's views of same sex marriage laws here in Ohio. My goal was to fill the pastor in on the tremendous percentage of transgender women and men who try to take their own lives and yes-I was one of them.  To me, the process is the one biggest litmus test  which determines if a person should be a spiritual leader at all.  This pastor was truly struck by my story and it essentially was the thought I sent on to Boehner (mentioned by Grant) - a simple "what if" your son or daughter was TGLBQ.

The whole idea is so complex though, even it has it's own moral and political bases.  Morally, would the politician support his or hers offspring. Politically, would they continue to deny basic freedoms to the child, mandated by their electorate and finally what level of hypocrisy would they attach to it?

Can't of course speak to any of that, it's just an observation I have but together from my humble place in the world.  I do agree with Grant though, "our community" is organizing better than ever and I do hope our time is now on several platforms including weeding out several long term ineffective career politicians in Ohio.  Their records of lack of response, go way further back than TGBLQ reform. Including current huge social problems such the heroine epidemic, violence against ALL women and more. Old ideas and praying simply are NOT solving the problem.

On the other hand, I see the reaction on several fronts from young fresh minds and I get excited! What isn't lacking for me is a sense of excitement of how the world could become!

Cyrsti's Condo "Power Scope"

"Up Scope!" and let's look to the stars!

Libra.- (September 23-October 22): If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Don’t let logic slip your mind when you want to take an easier way out. There are no shortcuts now and as lucky as you feel, be mindful of what you agree to. Of course, optimism is a beautiful thing, but this week it can make you a sucker. You’re better than that! Just note: If you sweat this week, you’re doing it right.

The problem with this scope is...with the hot humid summer weather around the "Condo"  there is plenty of "glistening" going on with me anyhow!  As far as optimism goes, I rather take my chances with it other than the opposite-negativity!

As always, be positive kids and go here to theFrisky for your scope!

Back Fill!

This is sort of a "companion" post to yesterday's very abbreviated "Sunday Edition" here in Cyrsti's Condo.

As you may remember, my Mother in Law is in very critical condition in the hospital and basically they have put her in a self induced coma. There isn't much to do but wait and pray that whatever happens-she is comfortable and gets to a better place. "Nuff" said.

Of my wife's family, her Mom and her sister are really the end of the line.(Of course my wife passed years ago.)  When my sister in law met up with me yesterday before we went to the hospital, see hadn't seen me for awhile.  I wasn't wearing a ball hat and the first thing she said was something to the effect of "if I didn't know your hair wasn't natural, I wouldn't know."  I said the hair or the color? The hair of course is all natural.    She said no - the color or colors from what is left from my last high lighting.  By this time, I was figuring the conversation was heading in the only direction it really could and I said, "yes my hair has been highlighted and there is a reason. Then, I told her the whole reason why, I was transgender which led to an hour's worth of questions about my life, my married life with her sister and my daughter.

Coming out to her went amazingly well with her for a couple of reasons.  First of all, with all the love in the world, I would describe her as having a couple of screws loose in the noggin. So with no real right wind political or religious agenda, I figured she would not have many issues with me coming out.  What blew me away though, was how much she already knew about trans women and men from television and it was positive.  Naturally, there were more serious issues at hand and quickly we were on our way to the hospital.

I don't recommend this idea as an ideal way to come out to a family member and I wasn't planning to bring it up.  When she was fishing with me though about what was going on as so many genetic women do-I just told her.

Ironically in her prime, she was a purse fanatic and when we got back from the hospital, she just had to show me the literally five large plastic tubs of purses she had stored away.  My wife would change bags twice a year, her sister-weekly it seemed.  At any rate, as she was going through them all and asking my opinion, she started giving me one or two
along the way. To the left you see part of the 18 purses I ended up bringing home (most in trash bags)

All I can say is, it's too bad we aren't the same size!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

No "Kerplunk" yet this week kids-all kinds of a crazy weekend which started with Liz and I celebrating yet another Pride night close to her home turf across the Ohio River from Cincinnati in Northern Kentucky and ending with my deceased wife's mother who I still consider my Mother in Law in the hospital in very critical condition from a ruptured intestine.

Plus, just to add a little spice I came out to my sister in law today too.

More later.

Trans "Girl Chat"

I have made mention here in Cyrsti's Condo of my two dear transgender friends, one a trans man and the other a trans woman.

The other night, I also made mention of the Equality Ohio meeting my trans girl friend invited me to attend. Afterwards, we were able to sit down and engage in some very rare T-girl chat.

No matter how you cut it, our experiences are so unique, it's difficult to even find another transgender person geographically close to you-let alone be able to sit down and talk face to face.

Even though my friend is much younger than me, in many ways we are at the same cross roads in our transition.  An example is how we both agonize over actually pushing ahead with our gender marker changes.  My problem is a combination of pure laziness and procrastination more than anything else. I'm notoriously bad about not living in the present, so if something isn't particularly bothering me (gender markers) then I can easily put them off in my mind.  As we discussed (and I have written in the past)  changing your gender marker with the DMV here in Ohio is not particularly tough and (as I understand it) neither is the social security set up.

On the other hand here,  birth certificates are impossible.  Plus, my trans guy friend has done all he could including a legal name change, so he knows the process and I can ask him for specifics.  I do know I have to go back to my therapist at the VA to get some sort of a letter too, so that is not much of a problem.  Other than that, I don't want to even get into how the VA works, except to thank trans vet Autumn Sandeen (shown above) for opening many doors I will need to go through to change my markers in the VA system which is a huge step towards NOT being called by your male name when you go in for an appointment.


Other than the marker chat, we talked about her work and how she planned to handle any transition on the job.  All three of us have gone different routes with jobs.  I of course am retired but I could tell you without a shadow of a doubt my last employer would have made any transition on the job hell on me.  My trans man has transitioned on the job already (with - as I understand it various stages of acceptance.) Finally, my trans woman friend has not transitioned past the point of being viewed (I imagine) as a very effeminate man.  One of them works for a perceived diverse company and the other company-not so much.  Bottom line is, she has a lot to consider with transitioning on the job including no real legal protection.

By now you are probably thinking, did you two have any sort of girly girl chat?  Yes we did.  She asked me why I rarely wear skirts and what was I doing about facial hair. Truthfully, I am very much a contradiction in terms (again) in that I'm sort of a "Tom-Boy" trans woman and that's the way it is. (It sends the trans purists over the edge. Like I'm supposed to conform to their ideas?)  As far as electrolysis goes, I have a couple problems called finances and aversion to pain. On the other hand, my friend is already baby smooth but seems to always be heading back for more treatments.

Finally, before we parted ways-we did talk about the future on a bigger "what if" scale, as far as possible surgical procedures.  My trans man is actually close to his "top surgery" and I wish him the best and all of a sudden, there is a glimmer of hope (with recent developments) I may be able to at least look into the two procedures I would really like to have-breast augmentation and FFS, facial feminization surgery.  I will have to get back with you on what my trans friend thought about herself except she "really" wanted something done about her nose.

So, all in all, it was a fun couple of hours with another person who has walked a mile in my shoes and vice versa. They are so difficult to find!!!

Cyrsti's Condo - "OOPS!"

I just knew I should have fixed that lock before my wife got home!