Beauty and Brains?

Trivia question...How many times have I have been called " a chick" by another woman? Once that I know of, Last night.
I was lucky and got a seat before the other six or so trivia competitors arrived and asked for their game consoles. I was also lucky when I knew more answers than normal, a fact not lost on the couple beside me.
The woman just couldn't get over how I knew all those answers. 
For once I was able to put together a soft presentable voice and kept saying "it wasn't knowledge it was luck"
Emboldened by her liberal use of the "she" word with me, I even kind of flirted with a single guy who sat down next to me for a quick drink.
I figured it was time to go when a couple behind me was trying to get my attention. (Never a good thing) While I was paying I overheard the woman next to me say to someone on her phone "the chick next to me is leaving, now I have a chance to win."
The couple behind me? Wanted to tell me I had something stuck on my shoe.
What the heck, "girls just want to have fun!"

Too Close To The Flame!

I really try to stay a short distance of my home for most of my social activities. Far enough away to preclude chance encounters with people I really didn't want to see.
Perhaps you remember my post from a New Years Day emergency visit to a local grocery when  two cashiers recognized me. I used to feel confident my two persona's would not be recognized. Until that day.
I know now, women can track me because of my eyes. (They have told me) Men of course aren't that observant or intuitive.
Last night I met a friend close to home and as we chatted, a guy across the bar bought me a drink As I looked to see who it was, I recognized him as a guy I know by name.
A quick consult with my genuine grade "A" female mentor brought back the answer. Women usually never return the drink favor. Just "smile and say thank you:" was the answer. I of course followed that advice, finished my drink and took off.
In most instances, I never really have a definitive answer on my girl life. I really feel I will when I see this guy again. One way or another.I may have taken another step out of the closet without knowing it. A more intriguing thought... when is he going to come out of his?

A "T" in Cross-dresser?

This post speaks volumes about a "silent" group in our community...the mostly hetero group of cross-dressers.
The great majority of us either occupy the cross-dresser category or may have passed through it. Many of our own community look down on them.
From "Diversity Guides.com" comes a lengthy read.
Here are some highlights:
"Cross-dressers are like bisexuals. They are allegedly in the majority of their minority communities (transgender and non-heterosexual, respectively) but no one knows who they are.
Many people generally assume that gay men make up the bulk of cross-dressers, which is probably true in the area of entertainment, but not in everyday life. Heterosexual women who cross-dress are usually referred to as "stylish." Many lesbians who cross-dress are often referred to as "butch." These gay women also face workplace discrimination, but their numbers are fewer, and they get much less amused attention than their heterosexual male colleagues in female attire."
As I read, I wondered if I was struggling through a rant or was there ever going to be a real meaning?
There was.
"It frustrates other cross-dressers, that too few people consider the unique needs of cross-dressing men when they talk about the "T." All the attention of national gay groups to the "T," it sometimes seems, has gone to ensuring that the medical costs of transitioning transsexuals are covered by their employers. This is a most worthy goal, but how about also focusing, she asks, on the need for some straight men to be able to occasionally come to work expressing the feminine side of their persona?"
"Many people in the gay and corporate communities don’t know this, but transsexual persons, especially those not in leadership positions, are not always great advocates for cross-dressing persons, and vice versa, despite them huddling together under the Transgender umbrella. But, when a company adds "gender identity" to its non-discrimination policy, it’s promising its cross-dressing employees, as much as its transsexual employees, that it will create for them a work environment in which they feel safe, valued, and included. People often cross-dress because of their fluid gender identity, and are thus covered by the words "gender identity."
Overall, the article is a good read that brought up many points I hadn't really considered in my own situation. Take a look.

The Wedding Fantasy, Transgendered Style

One of the strongest female experiences most of us have totally missed out on in our lives is the whole wedding process. Most women are preoccupied with the process from youth to middle age, when they are mothers of the bride or groom. "The girls at "Fabulous after 40" started my thought processes!
From the wedding dress itself to the bridesmaid dresses (every woman seems to complain about) I've been fascinated with the process.  The closest I've ever came to the event was an invitation  to a "bachlorette party"...kind of. The invite was extended as a "nice" gesture more than a serious one and I was "nice" enough to not accept. I shouldn't have been that nice! The strip club they went to alone would have been an experience of a lifetime! Too late now. I don't spend much time crying over spilled perfume.
You know as well as I do the multitude of web sites, bridal shows, magazines and reality television shows that deal with the wedding process. Wedding's are big business and the transgendered community is no different.
I'm sure you've seen a couple of the blogs or websites that deal with transgendered weddings. I'm talking about the dress and ceremony rather than the act itself. Lots of pictures of the trans bride in beautiful dresses. Many are hetero crossdressers living out their fantasy.
Not surprising when you consider the strength of the female experience. Maybe you are one that cherishes the thought or even the reality of the dress and the whole process. Walking down that aisle as the center of attention is a wonderful fantasy the great majority of us will never experience. Including me. I truly can't tell you if I ever want it to or at what level. I've never been a person who really respected all the expensive fluff of a big wedding. I just understood why and wondered how it would be to be a part someday.
One never knows though when the person will come along and change all of that. If it happens, I'll throw you the bouquet!

Transgender Mayor of NYC?

From "GaySocialLifes.Com". A transsexual mayor?
"She is real, outspoken and ready to shake things up. She is a party
girl, a girl of fashion, a nightlife personality and a prominent
member of the NYC scene. She is a true Gay Socialite, ‘fierceness
personified’. She is a transsexual who loves the city she has called
her own for two decades. Her name: Tiana Reeves.
She is real, outspoken and ready to shake things up. She is a party
girl, a girl of fashion, a nightlife personality and a prominent
member of the NYC scene. . She is a transsexual who loves the city she has called her own for two decades."
 I really don't know her politics. Just running for mayor in the publicity capital of the world would have to be good for our cause!

What WILL She Wear?

A real improvement!

In Britain, Transsexual Flight Lieutenant "Ian Holdum", is transforming himself into a woman called "Ayla". Nothing really special about that except "Ayla" is receiving an invitation to the upcoming royal wedding. It seems Ian was a member of the group the Prince joined following his training as a helicopter pilot. The officer was among 1,000 guests to get an invitation last month.
The unit is a tight knit search and rescue group which Prince William was part of. The quote was "Ayla is just another member of the crew - so why shouldn't she be there? There was no way William could exclude any individuals of the crew."
A great story! But now, what will she wear?


**Note.-Ian has been married for three years and has said she plans to continue the marriage. I just wonder if the wife had any idea of just how much better this guy looks as a woman?

Transgendered...Not an Option!

Scanning the vast mass of inane e-mail messages I receive, I noticed a "free" offer from one of the "major" dating sites.
Of course I looked at it out of curiosity. That's just me! I had heard a while ago this site had added gay/lesbian possibilities. I thought maybe transgendered too?
Didn't take me long to find out. Under the who is seeking whom, the usual choices. "Man seeking woman, man seeking man" you know the rest. Well, as always I fit into none of these categories. Very used to that! I also knew that nothing is really free on these sites. So I went on with my life.
Once again though, our transgendered group was not an option. At the least they could have another listing for "I rather not say" or even "mixed."
I even went to a gay and lesbian site called "Chemistry" and couldn't find a transgendered category.
Yes, I know places exist for transgendered people but most are sleezy at best.
Unfortunately, our false "Jerry Springer" sensationalism must have proceeded us and doors are closed or we don't have enough economic clout to count. Recent survey's have indicated that could be the case too.
The "T" in"GLBT" is again silent.
No real surprise.

Wow!

I don't know if this has existed for awhile or not but Go to "Shape Shifters" by Mariette Pathy Allen!
It is part of the "Forward Thinking Museum" and wonderful.
cyrsti

Movie Review?

A scene from ... Dalam Botol, which features a gay male character who regrets having a sex-change procedure. Photograph: Bazuki Muhammad /Reuters

No not a review, just an update on Malaysia's first transgendered film. Of course it is billed as a gay film. The fact one of the lead characters had a sex change is a secondary headline. The producer has a friend who went through the surgery to please his gay boyfriend.
Certainly we have all heard of this before.  Examples graphically point to the difference between the gay and trans cultures".
From the "Guardian" comes this article.
"Boy meets boy. Boy falls in love with boy. Boy has a sex-change procedure in a misguided attempt to please his lover. Boy regrets his decision, moves back to hometown and falls in love with a girl.
Malaysia's film censorship rules require gay and transgendered characters to regret their actions and learn from supposed mistakes, guidelines to which … Dalam Botol had to conform in order to receive screening permission."
This film, of course is not being well received in many sectors of the country. Specifically, the Muslim religious sector.
This ground breaking film will hopefully open many doors in Malaysia for the gay community. Those doors shouldn't be opened at the expense of the transgendered culture.