Checking Your Trans Card?

As I was driving back from Cincinnati today, I began to think about the two young feminine cashiers/baggers at the grocery store Liz and I were checking out at last night.  Both of them were positively falling all over themselves to be nice to me. In fact, I was almost embarrassed. 

This morning I thought-Wow! How times have changed. I am not however naivete enough to believe times have changed for all the transgender community-across the board. Take Cincinnati for example, it's very possible if I am visiting one of the new upscale venues in the downtown "Over the Rhine" district - a trans person or two adds to the true valued diversity of the area. 

But, if I head out 50 miles east of the city, I could just as easily be verbally attacked (or worse).

As I have said here in Cyrsti's Condo, I work as hard as I can in an attempt to garner as much "passing privilege" as possible. Number one, why wouldn't I and number two, I certainly may need it!

Perhaps you have caught the story of a transgender woman finally being tied in with violence in a women's restroom. The problem is - she was attacked by a cis man who followed her into the restroom. That's exactly what we all need, some guy checking out our trans cards and then deciding to beat us up-in the women's room. I know the feeling. In fact, I have a very close genetic friend Min, who has ran restroom "protection" for me in a few situations. (In addition to Liz of course.)

This post though, is not about rest room privilege at all. It is however about the most powerful trans card of all-your personality. More on that next. 

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Morning Edition"

KerPlunk! Another Sunday edition is hitting your virtual front porch! Here on the banks of the Ohio River we are looking ahead at a pleasant summer Sunday. The "Joe" will be hot this morning! (coffee) Let's get started:

Page One-The Week that Was-or Wasn't: Truthfully, my only real transgender input from the outside world this week came when I had a chance to watch a couple episodes of the Jazz Jennings family documentary. I find Jazz to be adorable, and not just because of her loads and loads of passing privilege. Her family's support is amazing and I have equally laughed and cried during every show.

Page Two Opinion -Do We All Know Each Other? Past Jazz this week,  all I really saw was Greg Louganis appearing on a show plugging his new HBO show. If you remember Louganis- he won gold medals at the 1984 and 1988 Olympic Games on both the springboard and platform. He is the only male and the second diver in Olympic history to sweep the diving events in consecutive Olympic Games. And came out as openly gay. One of the questions presented to him was, did he ever meet Caitlin Jenner (another Olympic medal winner.) before she came out or since. He said no and added of course he knew tons about the "Gay" part of the LGBT community, the lesbian "L's" much less and we "T's" even less. But wanted to learn more now. Much the same as my VA doctor told me this week. His son is gay.

Page Three - Different Daughters from the Same Mother? During the past week I received a wonderful note from Shelle concerning my Stiletto's on Thin Ice Book. Shelle and I are Midwestern girls of the same age range who have shared more than a couple hard fought victories to claim our gender rights. Many want to believe trans woman like Caitlin Jenner define transgender activism when in reality it's women like Shelle and so many of you( I haven't met or reached out to) who do the grass roots work. Turning a caricature of us as people into human beings.

Page Four- The Back Page: For those of you that have asked-thanks! I am feeling better and yes life is but a circle the Goddess sends us on. I thought about finish this edition up with the old clique "Whatever doesn't kill you, will just make you stronger." Well "I ain't dead yet" and thanks for stopping by the Condo!!!!! 

You Can Never Go Home-But You Can Just Go Away?

As you regulars here in Crysti's Condo have noticed-fewer posts this week. (Don't cheer dammit!) The real reason is another walk through hell this week. More than just 100 degree heat indexes.

I had access to Liz's 17 year old son to abuse for a couple days in my house. We managed to move several of my vintage furniture pieces downstairs to possibly sell. But, Tuesday was yet another fun day at the Doc's. To be blunt, I felt like shit. Of course a generic woman can just tie her hair back, toss on a pair of old jeans, t-shirt and head out. I just said "screw it" and did the same thing. Wrong-wrong-wrong I found.

Literally, the Doc was having a difficult finding me. Why? My name matched - but not my new picture he had for his system. He was a cool Doc and blunt as hell and flat out asked me WTH was I transgender??? I said Duh!!! yes!! Male name, female picture, male in his office?

Fortunately, he calmed down and he said he knew what was wrong with my liver and could be treated-about the time his assistant Doc came through (plus a resident student) and he said yes "he is trans" and he is in "boy drag" (my terms.)

In all fairness to them, the fact my hands skin have been falling off for the past months was fascinating. I just asked could have I have it "cured" by Halloween or was I saving costume money this year. By this time my humor was running thin and of course it was time to move on to other tests.

The week was far from over though. Thursday was hiding a uninsured fender bender accident on my "Roll's" and Friday morning my old dog has an emergency vet visit for an inflamed eye.

Hey! At the least life is never boring. Just wanted to check in and tell you all what was going on and yes-tomorrow night (Friday) is going to be a beautiful night for a "blue moon!" (not the beer!)

Cyrsti's Hart "From the Hart"

Gender Mixer

Lately here in Cyrsti's Condo I have been writing about last weekend which began with my first pedicure and ended with selling a vintage collectible for my sister in law.

Of course along the way I wrote about being called "Kris" Saturday. Blah,blah,blah.  My precious little ego recovered quickly enough in the sweltering heat and we headed on to our next stop.

Momma Karma has a way of twisting me in the wind. She seems to always remind me the impact of HRT and a transgender life is fleeting. An existence where "passing privilege" blows in the wind for me.

I had an example Sunday. I was dressed in boy drag to meet the person who purchased the item. Afterward, Liz and I stopped by a fast food place to get a salad before we headed back to Cincinnati. As we reached our place in line to order, the cashier said "can I help you ladies?"

Momma giveth and taketh away.

You Can Call me Ray or You Can Call me Jay-DON'T Call me KRIS!

If I took the time to list the ever growing list of things which aggravate me ( which I call my bucket list of sorts.)  Actually-the new one is becoming  the bigger list these days.

One thing which has a tendency to really get me going is when people I know slightly start calling me "Cyrs." First of all, my name is not a feminized version of my male name. My name actually comes from "crystal" - from how light passes through it.  Calling me "Kris" in my pea brain is similar to calling me "he, dude or sir."

I have already written here in Cyrsti's Condo about Liz and I going Saturday to the Celtic Festival in Dayton, Ohio. In the middle of walking down the middle of the vendor tents, I heard someone scream "Kris!" I normally ignore a situation like that the same way I do when and if someone tries to call me "sir." And, I did. Liz didn't hear it and we kept on walking until I heard it again "Kris!!!"

Finally I turned around to look and see what the commotion was all about and saw two people Liz and I were acquainted with from one of our "Meetup" groups. In all fairness to them, they are acquaintances-not bad people and obviously in need of some "TLTE" (Tender Loving Transgender Education.) - Which has started already 

It's rumored I am known to have a bit of a temper, so it's fortunate we didn't meet up with those two in person later on Saturday. Already I am working out a better explanation of my profile name in this group 

 In the meantime, there will be more to this story which happened the next day!

"Mix and Match" Weekend

To all of you (and Shelle lles) who haven't gone the pedi route - it was fun- Even after going through the increasingly normal "passive aggressive" transgender reaction I'm getting used to in the world. Example?  I don't have much belief in "coincidence" but somehow out of six "technicians" two were male and I got one of them. To my knowledge, no one said anything mean about me, but then again I couldn't have understood them if they did. During the relatively quick process though, I'm relatively certain half of the shop walked by and gave me the famous quick side glance. Anymore I just try to catch them in the act and embarrass them.

It was all good though, Liz has been going to this shop for years, I love my toes and we tipped cash. From there we went ahead and went out for some lite dinner.

Through the whole dinner experience, I was able to be free and relaxed. The clientele was youngish and relativity upscale. The "ladies" word was used with us as freely as the names of the "craft beers" on tap!

However,  the rest of the weekend would provide me with several more opportunities to sample the "world's wares." As Liz says being with me may be exhausting-but it is never boring!

Stay tuned!!!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Morning Edition"

KerPlunk! and welcome to another Sunday morning edition! It's building to another very warm 90 plus degree Ohio summer day around here, so the "joe" (coffee) is going to being iced today. Let's get started:

Page One-The Week that Was-or Wasn't. Not much ultra new or exciting last week. The usual suspects populated our transgender world such as Caitlin Jenner, Jazz Jennings and yes even Zoey Tur. Plus, we picked up a discussion on Trans woman Carly from the ABC Family Network. Even though we know "reality" is not often "reality" on American television, the discussions often are-after the cameras are off out here in the real world.

Page Two-Of Interest: As you regulars know, my choice of pursuing gender reassignment surgery is no. I understand the drive for so many others to have SRS but at the age of 65 what is between my legs does not define my gender. But-I do not hold it against others who desire the operation deeply. However, what has been happening little by little is others are feeling that way too-many in the younger generation who identify as gender fluid, agender or whatever. As always, I can't help but wonder how I would have felt "back in the day" when I was young and the same info would have been available. 

Page Three-It's Raining Men- in Skirts? Yes, yesterday was the Dayton, Ohio Celtic Festival and more than a few of the men showed up in their finest kilts. If you are not sure what a "kilt" is all about, follow the link. Rest assured kids, these guys weren't cross dressers-at least yesterday! I do have some pictures (no not in a kilt!) around somewhere on Liz or I's phone to pass along later then again you know what I look like.

Page Four-The Back Page: Before we take off, I am going to pass along a story from the other night  when Nikki, Kim and I got together for an adult beverage.  As I have mentioned before, both of them are of the "lesbian" faith. After we had been there awhile, it became evident a couple others of "the faith" across the bar were having an emotional moment. Nikki, who is never shy about buying others a "beverage" had the bartender sent the person across the bar (who was crying) a drink. The bartender said "from whom?" Nikki just said "from the team. How sweet!!!

Thanks as always for taking your valuable time for stopping by! Luv's ya!!!

Transgender Snow Flakes?

Hopefully the world is finding one meeting or even television show at a time, we transgender women and trans men are as different as snowflakes. Pat, Connie and Mandy have mentioned many times how simply "making contact" in the world brings the public to us-not the reverse. Connie gets the credit for this quote:

"Transgender women or men who are shown by the media are done so for economic reasons. Whether it's supposed "reality" or portrayals in an entertainment sense, we can only hope that the general population does not use them as examples to define the rest of us. Gender Identity is the only thing we may have in common; the rest of who we are is as different as are snowflakes."

This quote from Connie actually came from one of my who/us posts and I paraphrase: Caitlin Jenner did take one for the team when she received her Espy Courage Award. On the other on Becoming Us Mtf transgender woman Carly, seems more interested in taking one for her. (Or in her case-taking one off.)

From my angle, all of the PR, does seem to be making my life easier. I look at it as a cooking mix of sort: Put in a mix of HRT (hair-skin-etc) add a pinch of public relations and baking it with my half baked friends!