Rockin the Airwaves!

I can't say Thursday brought back many fond memories of my radio disk jockey days which ended in the early 1980's , but it's worthwhile to note the feedback from a couple of you who heard the broadcast.
 First, The "Fabulous Connie Dee":  I listened to the broadcast stream - not sure if it was up or downstream-complete with commercial interruptions. I even tried to call in (after making a search for their number), but they apparently have but one line, and they would wait forever to hang up on each caller. I thought that it could be fun if we were on at the same time. You did just fine by yourself, though. I remember a Cyrsti from not that long ago who would not have been so restrained. I would have shamelessly plugged your book, had I been given the chance/ {:-)
Connie, don't worry, I have not developed a new "laid back" personality, unless by some chance HRT is working some sort of changes on me. And, I haven't developed the "Dr. Phil" mentality yet by trying to plug my "Stilettos on Thin Ice" book , although I should before I get invited to Ophra's house!


As far as the radio station itself- WAIF, it's a local "subscriber" supported radio station and I really don't know if it is not another of the many "faith based" radio stations around here or simply a non commercial one.  Except for the commercials you pick up on line on their "stream". Yes Connie, being on with you would have been a dream come true- or nightmare when we got kicked off!


And, Janet Warner sent in this comment:  Cyrsti,
I caught part of the show today and heard you when you called back in the second time. I thought the show was very positive, it is so wonderful that finally what it means to be TG is being discussed openly on a radio station with a broad audience. It is a rotten shame however that it takes the death of such a young innocent person to shock folks enough to have the discussion in the first place. Hopefully some good will come of all of this, but as one of the callers said, until it is no longer legal to discriminate against a person on the basis of gender identity, it is hard to see how real progress can happen.


Thanks Janet!  Indeed it is sad a young transgender person has to take her own life for this to happen. Didn't you think the program showed the depth of the problems we face?  Mr. teen therapist Moderator Tom, relayed right off the bat how stunned he was when he found about the "Josh Alcorn" he knew and the problems "Josh" was facing.  At the least now, Moderator Tom has heard about the problems of being transgender and how close to home and well hidden it can be.


While the conversation did show the depth of ignorance we face, until we face up to talking about it-no real progress can happen.  I was happy when I got back in to the show for the third time, I was able to have been one of two transgender veterans on the show. I was able to mention the discrimination active military members face IF they chose to come out.
While I doubt if I will be invited back to participate anytime soon on the station (even though I was not a wild woman), I think perhaps I will get a mention or two at "Moderator Tom's (and Leelah's church) on Sunday. I would love to be a fly on that wall-until I got swatted for being a trans fly.

Cyrsti's Condo Vintage Cartoon

Way, way way back in the day female impersonation cartoons such as this was something I looked for in every one of Dad's Playboy's:

Walk a Mile in My Shoes?

German digital channel ZDFNeo has ordered a six-episode version of Israeli-originated sex-change series Re-Gender.

The format was originally created by Israel’s (now defunct) Buzz Television and started out on Channel 10 in Israel. It is billed as a provocative social experiment and the format sees five men and women swap gender roles to fully appreciate the challenges faced by the opposite sex.

Number one, this is not a sex change series. These people may have a small window to see behind the gender curtain.  I'm biased as I have seen shows like this before.  Along the way, the guys complain about wearing heels or feeling uncomfortable when they always managed to get hit on by another guy.  The women somehow always run into a potentially embarrassing trip to the men's room.  Year's ago, I did see at least one show where the husband turned out to have tons of "passing privilege" His experience was interesting when he ended up working in a temp office job and had a bigger look into a more extensive feminine existence.  

But, as we all know-or should- living as your non birth gender involves more than shopping in the mall appearing undetected as a woman. 

Finally, for the average person on the street, a "fluff" show such as this will be likely to be entertaining to at least the women in the room and/or their closeted cross dressing spouses. For those of us in the real world-not so much.  

Why I'm Leelah Alcorns Greatest Nightmare

And why I could have been her greatest hope.

As you remember, she had written she didn't want to go through life looking like a "man in drag"  It's no secret I have struggled with "passing privilege" my entire life and not the example I would want to show a young transgender girl.  Then again, I do.

I wanted to show her I could have been her greatest hope.  After all, at the least, transgender people like me are survivors. We have been through the taunts, the rejections and the suicide attempts.  With, or without our families we have made it.  If Leelah was sitting in front of me today, I could say yes it does get better to an extent but changes more.

I thought it was interesting Tom, the moderator/therapist of the show (who continually pleaded ignorance on LGBTQ issues) wasn't ignorant enough to not mention one person who went through SRS, lived as a woman for years and now wants to go back to living as a man.  About that time I was trying to call back the final part of the show and rejoin the discussion-but couldn't get back in.

You see Leelah, it would be easy for me to brush off your 17 year old ideas of finality. What you see at 17 is a brush with reality and far from final.  Don't we all know the kids in high school who peaked then?  Tom, could mention attempting to reverse a sex change after 30 years but didn't have the information about puberty blocking medications?  It just seems to me a person who deals with teen counseling would have some sort of idea.

I'm biased of course but if Leelah was my child, I would recommend the puberty blockers as a "hedge bet".

So yes, I am the person (quoting Tom) who sounded "like a man" on the phone. (I do) but Leelah, it's so sad no one encouraged you to go on puberty hold. The gender landscape is changing so rapidly, your future would have been so bright and not similar at all to mine. Plus, due to length considerations on the radio (I assume) no mention was made of the family's desire to pull Leelah out of school.  I didn't bring it up because I am not sure of the extent of the accuracy.

Plus, lost in all of this is the semi truck driver who was just making a living.  Does Leelah's church pray for him?

Between A Rock and a Hard Place And a ----

I really did not know what to expect from today's radio show on WAIF in Cincinnati.  I come away from it still not knowing.  I want to thank Connie and others for your support.  The show was moderated by a teen therapist with a lesbian and I called in for the first half hour and then for approximately ten minutes later.The therapist actually knew Leelah but only as Josh and was definitely trying to walk a type rope over a canyon he knew nothing about.  Then again I question if he wanted to understand at all.

Bowing to forces he would not identify, he refused to use Leelah's first name, referring to her only as "Alcorn."  I pretty much stuck by my guns and went in for the understanding of transgender youth everywhere.  I have to say, he was pretty slick.  He would say if one of his three teen children was transgender, he would support them and he wasn't a Christian therapist -he was a therapist who was Christian.  Then, later on he said "Alcorn's parents didn't know the extent of his concerns." I just said aren't they the parents and shouldn't they?

About this time another transgender woman called and waded in, with more force than I and with the same results-none.  I was remembering about what Racquel told me about fundamental conservative Christians at this point, "They would simply circle their wagons, find others to blame and move on."  Racquel was right and I'm not so sure I wasn't wasting an hour or so out of my life today.

As far as the lesbian co-host went, she was typical too. I wouldn't expect her to spend her life worrying much about the differences in sexuality and gender anyhow. She had her own "cross to bear" coming out to a Pentecostal/ Baptist family. No fun doing that.

So my expectations were exceeded - zero plus zero equals zero.  The therapy peep will to go back to his peeps with no perceived real knowledge or sympathy. After all,  "don't all 17 year old's rebel against their parents like this?" And, by the way, how does Cyrsti get through life if his er her voice sounds like a man on the phone?

The world goes on, I just wish I could have slowed it down a bit more.

A Trans Girl Should Be Three Things

Recently, I saw this fashion board on Pinterest called "A Girl should be Two Things-Classy and Fabulous."

Being a trans girl, I added a third because we transgender women have to try harder.  We have to be Fabulous, Classy and Act Like We Have Been Here.  It's nearly impossible for me to pull up an example, but I am going to use boxing legend Kellie Maloney (left) who went through a publicized Mtf gender transition in 2014. Kelli looks genuine, happy and like she belongs.

So, when I read comments from haters within our community who want to emphasize ONLY appearance.  I was watching a show on Oxygen called Living Different .  The show features several different generics including one who is in love with a Ftm transitioning transgender man and one of the most androgynous models I have seen-known as Rain. "Rain" dates both genders and in the show had one of her prospective photographers (generic) locked eye to eye.  My sister in law was watching it with me and said the photographer without a doubt would go out with Rain.  I said not so fast...when I meet civilians, many times I can see they are locked "onto me".  I am "fabulous" because they have never met anyone like me, not because they want to run off and do insane things with me.  Class follows quickly because indeed I need to downplay any idea I am brave or courageous because I am living life on my terms.  Finally, I have to be calm and play the moment because most of the time I am the teacher.  Fortunately I can, because increasingly I have been here and are doing it.

It's just another reason I believe in attitude over appearance when we transgender people interact with the world.

Cyrsti's Condo "Woman of the Day"

Our feature cover of the day is MtF transgender woman Carol Marra  (left)

As a young boy in Brazil’s heartland, Carol Marra watched her parents politely correct strangers who said what a pretty daughter they had. In her teenage years, she coveted the boyfriends of her female classmates and tried out androgynous outfits, dutifully changing back into a young man’s clothes in her car before returning home.

Now a favorite among Brazil’s growing class of transgender models, Ms. Marra, 26, has become a star. She filmed two mini-series for major Brazilian television channels, is starting a lingerie line, and was the first transgender model to walk Fashion Rio — considered a top national runway event — and also the first to pose for Revista Trip, a Brazilian culture magazine that features female nudes.

While My Blog Quickly Froze!

Damn it's COLD where I live here in Ohio and as bad or worse other places.  It was down to a "balmy" -25 degrees wind chill last night.  Actually, this is my second winter transitioning into the "polar vortex" or whatever else the weather peeps are calling it this year.  It's so cold here-the eggs are freezing inside the chicken!

I have whined forever here in Cyrsti's Condo on how HRT ruined my body's thermostat.  I used to be a "furnace" now I'm a freezer which presents obvious problems.  One of the truest points of transitioning is when you get to the point of choosing a wardrobe for everyday wear.  It was a huge realization for me when all of the sudden I needed clothes for every occasion, everyday and all of the sudden I was wearing them so much, they were wearing out.  "Back in the day" when I was going out a couple days a week as a cross dresser, my fave outfits lasted forever it seemed.

This year I have been farther out in front of the frozen curve.  I am set with fleece lined leggings, boots, sweaters and coats for the winter.  My problem is planning ahead for me involves about a week or so.  It's difficult for me to figure out what I am going to buy at the grocery store to eat tomorrow.  On the other hand, it seems I have an innate sense of style colors for myself, which work well with winter fashion. (Don't ask me to pick colors for your house though!)

Also, I have decided to think a little farther ahead - warmer weather and spring fashions can't be that far away!  Excuse me, I have to head out and see if my car will start!!!

Remembering Leelah on the Radio

Recently, I have made a mention of my invite to join in on a radio discussion of LGBTQ suicide on a radio station close to Leelah Alcorn's hometown.

Thursday (tomorrow) WAIF radio in Cincinnati, will have a diverse set of individuals (including me) along with a local (conservative Christian) minister concerning LGBT issues with the church and families. The discussion will be moderated by a therapist, Thomas Cox, from  NKY. (Northern Kentucky University) The show runs from 12-2 (EST) and you can hear it on the link above.

So, if  I can manage to not get kicked off before I start, maybe I can add a bit of reality to the discussion.We know the reality of being transgender is not a choice it's a need but most religions don't. I simply don't understand why, probably as much as they don't understand me.  But, they need to know I am not their enemy and I deserve the same respect.  If they think I am going to hell-well- I may think I could see them there.

Call me an alarmist but  religion in this country is now following politics into a  highly polarized state, which is not good.  All of the sudden, (it seems more and more) if you are a conservative politically it follows you have to be a socially/religiously conservative person.   And, whatever happened to a loving caring God?

The only thing I do know is tomorrow we won't be able to come up with all the big answers we need. At the least though, it's going to be nice to talk about them.