Pandora's Box

 I have wondered forever,  what role does an attractive cross dresser's feminine presentation play in possibly later moving her into a transgender existence? Is it similar to the worn out idea that a majority of heroin users got hooked because of marijuana? Did my first experiments with Mom's hose and underwear get me hooked, or was I just predestined to be who I am today? I believe the answer was a little of both. What caused me to open that Pandora's Box of goodies? By the way, this definition of "the box" comes from Wikipedia:  

The phrase "to open Pandora's box" means to perform an action that may seem small or innocent, but that turns out to have severe and far-reaching consequences. Certainly, the definition is correct. Little did I know how severe the gender torment I would feel during my lifetime and it's far reaching consequences. But what made me open the box?  My brother didn't and for all I know the greatest majority of male type kids in my school and town didn't. The simple answer is some sort of switch already existed in my noggin and I flipped it to "on".

Even more interesting is the number of "switches" we have ready to be turned on or off.  Why was it for me, the occasions I was told I made a better looking girl, was mistaken for one, or was made over to look like one, I felt worse about being a cross dresser a few days later. I believe now,  cross dressing never seemed to come close to explaining my first gender switch. . Hell, I didn't have a  "switch", I had a 50 amp circuit breaker!

I flipped the breaker and got a better look into Pandora's Box. I saw all the glittering bling of new wigs, dresses and heels. They were sooooo inviting but sooooo non fulfilling.  Finally, after years of torment, I ignored the bling and went for substance and found a book called the My Little Book of Trans.  I grabbed it and found there was even an instruction guide, which of course I didn't read first. Who needs "no stinkin instructions?"

As I blissfully thumbed through the book's  pages from back to front (I'm dyslexic) I learned my obvious gender disconnect wasn't so obvious to me. I had to read backward to  Chapter One in the "Book of Trans", to make some sense of my life as a trans woman.  A cross dresser looks like a woman, a transgender woman socializes herself as a woman and a transsexual acquires the sexual genetalia of a woman.  In addition, none of them ever become females and being a genetic female does not guarantee you're a woman.

Of course I spent 50 years fighting the crossdressing in me, five accepting the transgender spirit of my soul and no years obsessing on purchasing a store bought vagina. 

At this point in my life, I have to blame my slow learning on someone, so  I'm blaming it on Pandora!  I've been known to be nothing if not persistent.  Seems as if I kept bugging our girl with the box just long enough, she got up off the "good stuff" and threw the book at me!

By the way, "My Little Book of Trans" exists only in my fertile "itty bitty" mind.

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Jen Merrill is certainly not a new face around the internet but definitely a refreshing one.  Here is her own "bio":

I'm an artist who enjoys exploring the great gender divide and meeting fellow travelers and fans... While I have been diagnosed as transsexual, I live mostly as a male, venturing out regularly into the world as a woman whenever I'm in the mood. I really don't worry about labels... male, female, impersonator, transgendered, transvestite, crossdresser, androgyne... I'm just me, and my girlfriends all tell me I have a great sense of style and eye for fashion.

You can check her out on Pinterest or on her other sites.  She looks good in black and Googles easily!

28% Gave a Duck!

Or...they didn't give a "duck" and the ratings of "Duck Dynasty" took a 28% dive in the opening 5th season show. As it turned out, one of my least fave "tranny drag queens"- Rude Paul  came up with a potential home for the three million Duck defectors:  the Tuck Dynasty.

Certainly I'm impressed three million people are not gonna stand for Phil Robertson’s offensive comments about bestiality, gay sex and statutory rape!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Snuggle in and welcome to yet another earth shattering "Sunday Edition" here in 'the Condo."

Week in Review.- During the week, we featured several impossibly beautiful androgynous male models (who I want to hate!) Just kidding! On the opposite side of the spectrum we tried to cross Chris Christie's bridge and have an easier path (at least in New Jersey) to having our transgender birth certificates changed without expensive and painful SRS. As it turned out the rotund New Jersey governor blocked both.  Of course I watch any moves in this direction because I am facing many legal moves as my MtF transition progresses.  Christie gave some gobbledygook reason which sounded suspiciously similar to the danger of transgender women and men invading restrooms of their choice and committing ghastly acts. I considered the source, got mad and moved on.

Book Review.- It's fairly rare when I miss any sort of writing which involves itself with transgender women and men.  Not only did I miss this one, it turns out the trans woman and her spouse actually live within an easy traveling distance of me!  I featured Bobbie in a post aka Alana about her past and future writings and got this response:

WOW ... thanks so very much for sharing information about my memoir. Our target release date is Feb 14, 2014. I thought that would be the perfect date for releasing a love story. We're in line for meeting that date. IF anyone wants a signed copy from the first printing it can be ordered from www.hunginthemiddle.com. Let us know the next time you're in our area ... would love to meet in person. Bobbie Thompson aka Alana's Spouse (on FB and Twitter)

As I mentioned, the "road trip" mileage is definitely within reach as soon as the "polar weather" gets out of here for awhile!

We Got Mail Section.-  From Vicky, responding to our Hormone and the Hair Post:  I agree with you Cyrsti my hair I am just starting to grow out with the help of Rogaine then I am going to style it I hope it will not be to long until I can do it then no more wigs.  Thanks Vicki!  As I said, if and when you can ever be able to wear your own hair, it's a blessing.  Especially at my age!

From dloring on Christie's veto:

"You said it girl, no reason to veto that bill. The only fraud being perpetrated is by the Governor."

That's about it for this week's Cyrsti's Condo Sunday Edition.  You are the best for stopping by and checking in when you can!  Thanks so much!

Cyrsti

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Our feature model today is androgynous Tima Marso from Moscow, Russia...probably a secret Putin favorite!

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

 Food for thought : " A man in women's clothing is nothing short of obnoxious. On the other hand, a guy who uses clothing, makeup and hair to BECOME a woman is not."

Lynne S.

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl of the Day"

Our featured cover person of the day in the Condo is Anderson Brooks and here is is his bio from Model Mayhem:


My name is Anderson Brooks, I live in Los Angeles. I started modeling and acting when I was 8 years old and as a kid worked for brands like GAP, H&M, Sony, and Sean John to name a couple. I was signed with LA Models and LA talent for years but as my look got more edgy and androgynous I stopped working through them so much. I currently work mostly as a nightclub performance artist, host, and gay nightlife personality. I guess my whole goal in everthing I do is showcasing myself as my own original creation and stripping away gender rules and limits with my own brand of gender-bending. I am and plan on remaining 100% male.

My Husbands Looks Better in Lingerie?

Here's the full title: “My HUSBAND Looks Better in Lingerie Than I Do . . . DAMN IT”. It is a new book which actually has a target release date of Spring 2014, and is a companion memoir to “Hung in the Middle: A Journey of Gender Discovery” written Alana Nicole Sholar.

Here's more from Alana's spouse:


I had been friends with Alan for nearly 30 years and our past included a three-year intimate relationship. However, when I saw ‘Alana’ for the first time in December 2006, I told ‘her’ I thought she was a freak and I didn’t want to have anything to do with her. Two years later, December 31, 2008, we were married. (Alana tells her side of our story in her memoir and you can read Chapter 1 at her book’s website). Of course, my response to Alana came from MY ignorance and lack of experience with the trans-community. 

We live in a small town in Kentucky, so there is much ignorance and lack of experience with the trans-community in this area. It is our hope that sharing our journey together can help eliminate the ignorance and foster acceptance of trans-persons, not only in our small town, but all over the world. However, acceptance is not instantaneous – it comes through a process – at least it did for me. My process began at intolerance, advanced to tolerance, eventually became acceptance and grew into love. I’m a Kentucky girl raised in the Baptist faith and would have never dreamed I’d be such a staunch advocate for the trans-community, BUT, here I am – and mine is a ‘wonderful world.’

I am especially impressed and interested in this wonderful couple's story because of their proximity geographically to where I live.  So, I know quite a bit about the populace around them. I'm not going out on too much of a limb by saying, gaining transgender acceptance by anyone is not an easy path.

If you, like me, want to read more , follow the link above!

Crossing Christie's Bridge

Under the white hot spot light of a rumored future bid for the United States Presidency, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie's true spots are beginning to emerge.

Perhaps you international visitors here in Cyrsti's Condo (no relation) have heard the story of how last summer, the governor's aides basically shut down partial access to one of the busiest bridges in the world supposedly as a political "punishment". As the story broke, Christie broke down (not on the bridge) threw a couple aides under the bus (not on the bridge) and tried to apologize. Turns out the governor's blood is still in the water and the political sharks are circling.

If I lived in New Jersey and was affected by the bridge move, I would be bitter too.  Yet another arrogant move by another politician.  Not much new there. What indirectly does affect me though, is Christie's recent veto of a bill  this week that would have eased the process by which transgender individuals can change the gender markers on their birth certificates.

From the Philadelphia Gay News:

 The proposed legislation, which both chambers of the New Jersey legislature passed last year, would have allowed the state to issue amended birth certificates for individuals who have undergone clinical treatments for a gender transition, including such methods as hormone therapy. Current law requires gender-reassignment surgery for certificates to be changed. In his veto memo, Christie said the bill could provide an opportunity for individuals to commit fraud. He contended that “New Jersey already has an administrative process in place to streamline applications to amend birth certificates for gender purposes without court order. Under the proposal before me, the sponsors seek to alter the amended birth-certificate application process without maintaining appropriate safeguards.” 

Look, I'm no expert concerning the validity of why Christie vetoed the bill but his reason sounded suspiciously similar to the politicians in my city which refuse to offer across the board protections to TGLB citizens...those protections already exist.  When indeed they don't.

At the least, the governor is doing me a favor by marking him off of any candidate I may be interested in.  I'm intently following the Republicans and other third parties such as the American Independent Party, to see if there is any chance of restoring a semblance of a strong two political party system  Looks as if Christie will block the bridge again and he's out.