Candy Anyone?

"Candy Darling  and Jeremiah Newton"
Photo by Francis Ng.

A new documentary film on the life of the "Warhol" superstar "Candy Darling" is being released.
Unfortunately in my conservative part of the world, I don't see any locations listed.
Nearby Columbus was a little of a surprise. With a large gay community and the former host to a fabulous "Warhol" exhibit, I thought there might be a chance!

Famous or Infamous?

I have related the story in the past about the one bartender who said (as I tried to introduce myself) everyone knew me "I was famous:." It could be I'm "infamous?" I really hope not.
The only reality is that my little "network" I have tried so hard to maintain over the years works well... thank goodness.
I took advantage of the unseasonably cool weather recently and wore one of my long soft sweater coats.  It drops to mid thigh and ties off at the waist providing a distinct waistline. I love the outfit with jeans and flats and a tight "T" top which accentuates the chest. Can't remember having more confidence recently as a girl.
All of that was very satisfying, but the fun part was when one of the women who was moved from server to the bar waited on me and said "Are you Cyrsti?" She was perfectly delightful and wonderfully friendly and beautiful.  She really made the evening fun!
I always wonder what the guys at the bar think when they see us in a animated conversation? Does it validate me further? Certainly it makes me safer in the situation I'm in.
One fact is certain. Dividends were paid that night and were reflected on her tip!

Happy "Cinco de Mayo"!

From the "Dallas Observer"

Have a great "Cinco"!
Stay out of that tequila girl!
cyrsti

Give Me A Head With Hair!

Men want it when it goes. Men like the sensual look and feel of it on women..
Women spend excessive time and expense to coerce it.
What is the name of this human obsession? Hair!
In many cases we are stereotyped by it. The big bald man with tattoos  is perceived as vastly different than the black man with dreadlocks.
Women are ruled by the age/length hair stereotype.  Maybe the biological clock in women dictates the shortening of the hair as the years progress.
I'm tall so the rules dictate I'm "allowed" to go long with my hair. I'm "more mature" so I'm  not allowed too.
The erotic feel of the hair is wonderful and the effect is good.  I have no visible "Adam's Apple" because my neck is short and thicker. The longer hair and a "v neckline" give me the effect of a longer look which I need. The problem is  the less than realistic "wiggy" look. We have all seen the woman whose long beautiful hair does not quite match the rest of her. Her hair screams "wig"! I've actually seen two trans sisters in public situations whose hair gave them away.
I've said many times I rely upon the mirror and finally the public on how I present. Failure was never an option. Recently though, failure is tragedy.
I can always work with my clothes and I need to work with my makeup to keep my feminine life in balance. Hair seems to make it all happen or not. Maybe I'm not so different from my sisters who spend time and dollars on their hair constantly. Not so different at all!

Monday/Monday

What a great day Monday yesterday turned out of be!
Amazingly, the summer dress in the size I was looking for was still on the rack and it fit! (Down a full size!)
Just had to have a new spring bag I saw and a new bracelet of course.
The dress is very light and flowy and will be a godsend on a hot summer day with bare legs and "peekaboo" heels.
I went back to my straight hair style and had absolutely no problems with the public. A good thing in the short term but the people that read me in the curls will always remember me being trans. I always prefer an even shot when I enter a situation. I'm not naive enough to think everyone will think I'm female but I will take every break I can get!
I even made it through a situation later in the evening I hate to be in. I was stuck near a couple people I have known for years. They never gave me a second look but it would be another complication in my life I don't need if they did!
So all in all a fun Monday!

"Diva Dirt"! Transsexual World Champion!

I positively love this!!!!

‘The Bloodthirsty Vixen’ Amanda

A foxy women's wrestler who just happens to be transsexual and a world champion just gives me the warm and fuzzies!
Although I can't prove it, she looks like a trans wrestler named "Mariah" who I did a piece on here.
Here's the link from a site called "Diva Dirt... The Women's Wrestling Bible"
Now that's what I call classic women's literature!!!!
Quoting the title from the old "Confederate Railroad" tune "I like my women a little on the trashy side". Even if she is me!!!!!

Transgendered and Homophobic?

Last December I wrote this for my blog on the "PINKessence" . The subject had pretty much passed on in my mind until a couple days ago. 
A new "Pink" member zeroed in on the post and commented.  All of a sudden comments started to fly and it went to number 2 as the most popular post.
Here it is again.
So many of the transgendered girls I know are so anti male.
It is very easy to compare the trans girls distrust and dislike of the male gender to other people's dislike of the trans and or gay culture.
Time and time again "No Men" pops up in profile after profile.
Explanations are as shallow on one side of the fence as the other. From religion to
sexual distrust, we hear it all as a transgendered person.
Personally, I believe I've been sent to hell more than once for just
wanting to live as a female.
But you know, the mistrust and bigotry just doesn't come from males. So why should I or others be homophobic if a guy shows interest in us?
Is the old "guys are looking for only one thing" excuse valid. Maybe as valid as all the gay stereotypes?
It's no wonder that so many transsexuals go "stealth" and simply disappear into society. They escaped all the hypocrisy of our homophobic society. Maybe your next door neighbor lady
wasn't always a "lady" and happened to shed the "no man" label when she
found a good one?
No men or no gays can sound very similar.
Excluding men because of gender is as bad as excluding the "T" part of LBGT. No part of being homophobic helps you as a smart. attractive female...trans or genetic.

Trans 101

Educating "civilians" is an intregal part of my existence on occasion. One of those occasions was last night.
A group of three men and one woman were sitting close to me. I knew very quickly they knew I was trans and heard a few of the not so complimentary quotes.
Typically, when something like this happens I will just stay.  If they don't like me that is their problem. My rule is if I don't cause any problems for the place I'm in, I'm OK.
In a short period of time, both the woman in the group and I had to use the restroom. As we washed up she was playing with her hair and said nothing. We left and went back to our seats.
In a shorter period of time she switched her seat to the empty one beside me and the questions started.
The usual ones. What gender am I. Why do I live like this etc. No problem. I attempted to explain a gender fluid existence and the fact I was more female than male between the ears.
She then shifted the conversation into wanting to see my male self. Every once in a while this comes up and is rejected.
To the amazement of the others, we made the "girl" trip to the bathroom two more times and she made the obligatory "your boobs are bigger than mine" comment.
I just hope she took something positive back from the experience!
I will add my ideas later!

Love at First Sight?

As narcissistic and selfish as it may sound, I have fallen in love with that woman in the mirror who is me. As with most quick relationships, love turned to lust and then to reality.
As reality set in and my sorority membership started to become validated, my image became more complex.
As the same people saw me in the same situation multiple times, I was restricted in how I could change hair colors for example.
I have said it myself. Change is so much a part of a woman's looks. She can cut, dye and extend her hair. I found  I could do the same...by accident. I've told the story of my two dark hairstyles which are the same length. One is wavy and the other is very straight. Without hesitation I learned to tell inquisitive women my hair was naturally wavy which I didn't like and I have it straightened. Knowing full well most women never like their hair the way it is.
My many trips to wig stores over the years even provided me with yet another alternative. I have a short version of the straight hair and my story to go with it. Hair extensions on occasion give me the longer look.
On occasion, all of this hair talk makes me feel uncomfortable about the honesty of it all. It just happens so naturally and quickly it just seems right somehow.
The truly enjoyable fun part of the experience is that I am a huge fan of hair.  Hair is sexy, attractive and is even powerful. My three styles have given me an all important outlet for change and on occasion one or all of the above!