Old and New Friends

Liz's spiritual get together Sunday was great for the soul. Plus, I was able to reestablish old friendships and hopefully begin several new ones.

It was actually the second of two meetups we had to go to. The first was our monthly meeting for the Cincinnati Witches Ball which is coming up in October. The best news was we have a new venue since the old one was sold. It will be held in the party room of one of the bigger craft brewers over the Ohio River in Kentucky. It's all very exciting and our theme this year is "Steam Punk."

As I said, it was nice to see several old friends again who live a distance away. Among others, it was good to see Debra,Mickie, David, Ernie, Monica, Don, Casey and others. I also had a chance to meet a couple of other new attendee's Nikki and Katrina. 

After the ritual, we all sat down to eat and chat. It was nice when a couple people asked me about my weekend of experiences at this years' Trans Ohio Symposium. Liz was fueling the fire when she had to describe my drunken attack by a guy at Club Diversity when I was leading the conversation towards being interviewed for a book on transgender history. It was interesting trying to describe how the person doing the interview preferred pronouns were "they, them and their."

All in all, the weather was very nice and the day was outstanding.

The Effects

I fear not many really care about the effects of the senseless transgender military ban instigated by the "liar in chief" in the White House. To spotlight the issue, I found this article from the Annapolis, Maryland Gazette and Selene San Felice 

Alice Ashton and Deidre Hendrick

It concerns two transgender women struggling to fight the ban as it goes into full gear.

The article provides great insight into the timing and struggle around the ban and is worth a good read.

Follow the link above to read it.

A Busy Sunday

Saturday was a typical day, running errands and thinking about our transgender - cross dresser social on Friday night.

Friday night was fairly normal too, with the usual suspects attending. Approximately fourteen mixed in with a transgender guy, and a couple cis women. Ironically, for once, there were almost as many cross dressers as trans women. It didn't really matter, as everyone conducted themselves in a respectful manner.

Saturday, per norm, I accompanied Liz to her martial arts class and ran into one of her co-horts whom I know to a fact is a member of my support group. He must be a part time closeted cross dresser. I don't know what was wrong with him (or me) yesterday. For once I tried to be nice and speak to him but was repulsed by his head to toe inspection of me and a scowl. So much for that idea. However, he was counter balanced by Liz's instructor who said hello with a big smile.

As always, grocery shopping and other errands went on without incident. Maybe the closeted cross dresser was jealous I am living my real life, or he didn't like I was not dressed "up" to his standards.

Today, Liz is hosting a ritual circle for our group. A chance again to see my "adopted" Mom. I doubt today if my hair will pass her inspection since it has been awhile since I have been to my hair dresser. But again, we will see.

Jen Richards

Jen Richards is a transgender activist, writer, actress, and producer. Richards was born in Mississippi and resides in North Carolina. She graduated from Shimer College with a BA in Philosophy, and studied at Oxford University.

Are You a Pioneer...or Just Old?

As I have mentioned before here in Cyrsti's Condo, one of the pleasant surprises coming from this years' Trans Ohio Symposium was the influence of transgender history. And yes, my age made me all of a sudden relevant again. My experiences with many of the younger transgender women and men I had met had led me to feel otherwise. So it was good to feel accepted again.

Surely though, even with the current setbacks from the Liar in Chief in the White House, our present has changed considerably. Check out this comment from Connie which came from my Grand daughter's highly androgynous Prom outfit which basically was a tuxedo with heels:

"Well, there you go! Give yourself some credit for raising an accepting daughter, as well as finally being your true self - which has certainly served to break down some of the barriers that used to stifle gender expression. Although I don't see myself as a pioneer or hero within the trans community, I do take solace in the fact that living completely as the woman I was born to be has led to more acceptance by most of the people with whom I've had contact. It's the same for you, I'm sure. Oh, but such changes we've seen over the past seventy years or so!"

Thanks for the compliment! Needless to say, I am so proud of her! :)

 Of course, advances in the LGBT culture are more likely to occur in more liberal areas of the country than others. For example, I live in a fairly liberal suburb of Cincinnati but if you travel a mere ten miles or so East of us attitudes definitely change. 

On a bigger scale, if you live in an area such as Seattle where Connie lives is decidedly more liberal for transgender individuals than say, Arkansas where trans minister Elijah Walker

Elijah Walker

is trying to make a difference. check out the story here. Thanks to Bobbie for sharing.

Patti Harrison

Transgender comedian Patti Harrison.

Her appearance on the "Tonight Show" has led to a role on "Shrill" and writing duties on "Big Mouth".

As well as a story in the New York Times.

Are You a Feminist?

One of the questions which basically caught me by surprise during my interview during the Trans Ohio Symposium by J.M. Ellison, was I a feminist.

I said, of course I was and had been one years before I even transitioned fully.

During my years in the restaurant business, I worked mainly around women and their success was my success. Often, I learned the hard way what being a woman was all about, through their eyes. I saw how difficult it was for them to gain and keep the respect of macho dominated kitchen crews and often, how much harder it was for them to work with groups of women.

So yes, I became a firm feminist many years ago. So, it didn't come as a total surprise to me what happened to me when I began to transition to a full time feminine life. All of a sudden, I became a second class citizen when I was talking to a group of men. Also, I had to wait behind guys to get served and wasn't even given credit on how to get to my own house by a tow driver one time.

Amazingly enough, my learning experience carried all the way over to when I started what I called my "lesbian phase."  I ended up having many good experiences along with many which weren't so good. Along the way though, I sensed many of the women I came in contact with on a positive level were reacting to me because I presented as a "lipstick lesbian" with the slightest bit of maleness for balance. Of course most women don't carry the same sexual deep paranoia's as men do.

At any rate, I ended up adding another level of feminine understanding.

I was on a sensory overdrive to prove to my self I could prove my wife wrong when she said I didn't have any idea about what being a woman was all about.

On another level, what I don't understand is why transgender women have such a hard time being accepted by "Terf's"
(Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists).

Very simply, a trans woman has had a different path to becoming a woman. Plus, let's not forget being born female does not make you a woman. Society does.

It would seem to me, in a time where women's rights continue to come under attack, any help would be welcome to change society. Especially from a transgender woman who has been on both sides of the gender fences.

Under Attack!

As I have written about earlier here in Cyrsti's Condo, party time this past weekend at the Trans Ohio Symposium was very fun. As always, we went to our favorite spots Friday and Saturday night...Club Diversity and Thurmans' Cafe for a famous huge burger. Both in Columbus, Ohio.

Club Diversity

As always we Uber our way around Columbus and imbibe a little too heavily. Both nights I stuck to Ohio Brewed (Cleveland) Great Lake's Beer. 

Friday was fairly tame, with the usual amount of cross dressers teetering around on their heels and a few transgender women mixed in. All but a few seemed to be having a good time. I didn't take the time to try to mingle in with any of them and none seemed interested in talking to me. So, we were even. This picture was actually taken last summer at Diversity but I haven't changed much so I used it again.

Saturday, after doing our best to eat half of a huge Thurman's Burger, Liz and I returned to Diversity to consume more adult beverages and listen to a very entertaining live piano player.

Predictably, as the night grew later, the crowd became a little more festive, or in some cases a lot more festive. The cross dressers seemed to disappear for the most part only to be replaced by a few impossibly dressed "girls". One of which couldn't wait to remove her jacket and almost totally expose her "bought boobies" in a very skimpy halter top. Unfortunately, her mini beer belly didn't help the over all image she was trying to get to. But what the hell? Right?? A good time was had by all.

Liz's first Martini of the weekend.

There are actually two bathrooms to use but one is supposed to be for women only. It was in use when I had to go one time, so I tried to stand in line for the unisex bathroom. While I was waiting a man walked up and asked me about the other restroom. I said I was going to try to use it again and he said he would hold my spot unless (of course) I came right back.  It was open, so I took care of business and went back to my seat at the bar.

Well. a little later, Liz went to make her way through the crowd to get us some pop corn and in the minute she was away, this guy comes up and gives me this giant bear hug from behind and sticks his face close to mine and was starting to say something I couldn't comprehend. About this time though, Liz came back and didn't see the humor in any of it and ran him off...quickly.

Then, as we were planning to leave and were saying our goodbyes to our fave bartender. He ended up hugging Liz and kissing me on the lips. Needless to say it has been awhile since I have been kissed by a man with a full beard!

As always, we had a great time and can't wait to go back again!

Prom Time

I have written before here in Cyrsti's Condo about my three very accepting grand children.  I am so proud of the diversity and acceptance my daughter has instilled in them.

For years my grand daughter has presented as androgynous. However, she took it to a very gender fluid height for this years' senior prom. Her high school, obviously accepts diversity too!

Check out her picture! To my knowledge she hasn't mentioned any preferred pronouns as of yet.

Wow! I'm so proud!!!