Living in the Past

As much as I try to never dwell on what could have been if I had transitioned earlier in life, every once in a while the thoughts can't help but sneak in when I'm not watching.

For some reason this specific video triggered them. Check it out on the Cyrsti's Condo big screen:

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Paper"

Hard to believe another week has gone by so fast here in the Condo, as you have probably noticed,  every Sunday I'm trying to set aside a bit of time and catch us up on the week.

To begin with on our weather page, last night's wind chill temperature was a balmy four degrees Fahrenheit. Turns out my "fuzzy boots" were a good purchase!

In sports, both of my "OSU's" won yesterday. The Ohio State University and Oklahoma State University. Oklahoma State because they beat Baylor and pushed the Buckeyes upward in the national rankings.  Next week it's up to Ann Arbor, Michigan and the annual battle with the "Wolverini's"

Nationally, this week marked the 50th anniversary of the death of President John F. Kennedy.  Our tribute here resulted in several really thoughtful comments on his legacy.

Internationally last week marked TDoR, which stands for Transgender Day of Remembrance. In the "Condo" I tied the remembrance in with a reminder about our own security as transgender women and men. And Marcia Hamilton added this comment:

"You are so correct. I have only recently begun going out as myself. It was amazing the transformation I went under with regard to single men, groups of men, and being out after dark. I, like you, am now very safety conscious and do not allow myself to be in precarious situations."

Marcia I believe comments such as yours help to reinforce the ideas of personal security I was attempting to get across.  Too many people I believe take my statements with a grain of salt because I have been out in the world for a respectable space in time.  Those of you who are just getting your transition started in earnest mean more to many! I'm like your Momma jabbering away.

Also I would like to take this occasion to send my sympathies to Draco who visits here. He who lost a transgender friend to suicide this past week. So sad and even more tragic.

In the Entertainment Section, this week, I took the time to drive a bit and catch the 5th grade play my oldest grandson was in. Of course I'm biased and thought he was remarkable but even more remarkable to me is the teacher who put the play together. He makes no secret of the fact he is a very out and public gay man. Even to the point of being a performer in a local drag queen group who have raised over a million dollars for Aids. Times are a changing! Back in the day when I was in school before electric lights, we had teachers we assumed were gay but didn't dare say it.

Finally in the comments section, I would like to thank Linda Marie Daniels for her comment on the "I'm No Angel" post:  "Thanks for sharing this story. I know it must have been difficult to write."  Indeed it was Linda but it was something I felt I need to share for the benefit of all.I appreciate your feedback.

Well, I have to say this post is not going to give the Sunday "New York Times" a run for their money any time soon. At the least though, it's a chance for all of us to share the week and for me to thank all of you for stopping by Cyrsti's Condo!

Cyrsti's Condo Cover Girl of the Day

The beautiful Transsexual Kristen Taylor - Ms. Australia 2013 stops by the Condo!

TDoR and Personal Security

On occasion other issues in the news take away from the transgender community's greatest problem- death by our own hands and by others. Let's take a moment and remember this week commemorated The Transgender Day of Remembrance.

(TDOR) has become a global event held around this week each November to memorialize those who have been killed through anti-transgender violence. Since its emotional inception by Gwendolyn Ann Smith following the still unsolved murder of Rita Hester in November 1998, communities, allies and people of faith gather, often by candlelight, in solemn remembrance to read the names of those lost over the past twelve months.

What saddens and even terrifies me are the number of people in the world who think somehow transgender women and men are subhuman and disposable.

Every so often, I write a Cyrsti's Condo post containing personal security warnings for all of us.

As we transition from MtF, we do lose male privilege especially in the areas of personal security.  I have heard from a couple of Condo readers they never had male privilege to start with.  For as long as they can remember they have been bullied and abused as a man. For many more of us though, that is simply not true. I know in my case, I feel much more comfortable alone in most all public situations as a man than as a woman. More specifically, going to my car alone in a dark parking lot. In fact I don't even consider it as a woman.

Early in my transition, I held the view that somehow victims of violence or rape (Transgender or Genetic) were just in the wrong place at the wrong time-until I found myself in similar situations before I learned how dangerous this game could be.

I was lucky and removed myself from the problems before anything happened.  What I did learn was how quickly dangerous situations can threaten you as a woman.  I quickly became proactive and became extra careful where I parked and suddenly I began to notice single guys around me. Slowly and surely I developed an extra sense of where I was in relation to the world.

I know many trans women who aren't shy about taking security to a higher level by going through concealed carry weapons courses and the like. In my case I would be afraid I would shoot myself first but I understand why others would carry a weapon.

For all of us though,  TDoR needs to be a time of remembrance and a time to band together as a group for our own protection.

Finally, all you new transtioners please never take your security as a women for granted.  Chances are there could be someone watching you who isn't taking it for granted either.

Cross Dressing French Style

French women's style is legendary, even when it is a cross dresser doing it.  Check Jonathan Lambert on the Cyrsti's Condo big screen.  Passed along to me from Lynne! I have fun watching the other women watch Jonathan.  Some are amused, some like the red headed woman on the panel spent a lot of time looking at her like "you bitch" at the beginning of the video before her attention changed to watching something on the ceiling.

Cyrsti's Condo Cover Girl of the Day

The gorgeous transgender woman Isabella Santiago,

Miss Gay Venezuela 2010 stops by the Condo!

Donahue and I

"Lots O Comments" concerning the Phil Donahue/Tri Ess?/JoAnn Roberts post.

Francine's allows me to answer a good question:

"Thanks for posting this. I remember those days and later when the internet helped us all realize we were not alone. We were not crazy. By the way, How do you pronounce your first name? the spelling is different, so I have trouble."

Francine, my name is pronounced the same as "Kristi", or Christy. I just wanted to add a little "pizzazz" to it!

Paula's commented: "Yes in some ways we have come a long way, in others nothing has changed at all" Unfortunately, Paula, that is true but that show to me was a great example of the attitudes towards us "back in the day" where I lived.  Speaking only from my perspective.  I don't see that kind of ignorance and dislike anymore, thank goodness!

Finally, Mandy commented "Interestingly, I remember seeing that Donahue show when it was aired "back in the day." And, the "girl inside" has been peeking out of the closet ever since..." Mandy, I believe you speak for many here in Cyrsti's Condo and thanks for commenting!

I have commented before I'm partial to Donahue because he got his talk show start on a local TV station close to where I live (Dayton, Ohio).  I actually went to one of his shows in Dayton concerning the Vietnam War back in the late 1960's before he went national in Chicago.

Later on, one of Phil's shows focused on a former "biker" from Middletown, Ohio who basically came home, told his wife he wanted to be a woman so he cut his beard and off they went to K-Mart for makeup. She was one of the first transsexual guests I remember him having and of course she was much different than the Tri-Ess cross dressers.

I'm trying to find the video clip of her but basically she transitioned into a relatively shy long blond haired "good ol girl" which are so prevalent in my part of the world. The word was, she used to frequent a gay bar in Monroe, Ohio which I had been to a couple of times but I never saw her.

Another episode which stands out in my mind is this interview with an 18 year old Angie Roberts who now claims to go by  Angelina Roberts:

The Day the Music Died

For the majority of you Cyrsti's Condo readers who live in the United States, you would have to be living in a cave to not know this week marks the 50th anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy.

I was a newly minted 14 year old wandering the halls of the school I attended when the news came across the public address system. The day turned out to the first of two (so far) in my life, when time stood still. The other of course was the 9/11 attack.

My first thought was assassination?   What the hell happened and wasn't that just something you read about in history books and not a modern reality?

Well, as the coming years were to prove, the term was going to become all to common. It's not up to me to dwell on the charisma and leadership Kennedy brought to our country or the idea Kennedy was perhaps the last President to be totally claimed by two completely diverse generations.  My parents, because he was a hero in their war (WWII) and a hero to mine because he inspired us to be proud of who we were as a country.  We backed down the Russians, were going to the moon and established a radical idea like the Peace Corps to help other less fortunate countries. Plus lets not forget his wife Jackie whose style and grace seemed to elevate his charisma to another level or the sexy, mesmerizing Marilyn Monroe "Mr President"  birthday song which quickly erased all thoughts of Jackie's style.

So quickly, the era was over and with all due respects to Don McLean and his "American Pie" classic song, JFK's death was the day the music died. Vice President Lyndon Johnson took over and with him any hopes of me not visiting Southeast Asia with him.  All of the sudden our government was not inspiring anyone except with handouts and a totally ridiculous war.  The pressure got to be so much LBJ bailed and "Tricky Dick Nixon" stepped in.  The antithesis of JFK in many ways Nixon stepped into the presidency in 1968, the same year as the assassinations of Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. Finally let's not forget the fall of 1970 when the music really did begin to die along with Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin.

Certainly, John F. Kennedy benefits from being frozen in time. We will never know what directions our country would have taken and I'm certainly not smart enough to speculate.  In my life though, November 22, 1963 was the day the music died. Somewhere deep down inside, I knew it.


 

What Came First?

Or maybe I should say, what should come first, FFS or SRS assuming you are like many and can't afford to drain your 401K and savings and head to Thailand?

In a couple of many chance encounters I have had recently on this enormous thing called the internet,  peeps have bemoaned the fact they went through SRS but then in the next sentence said they were booking FFS as soon as they could.

I guess it's just me, but I think I would reverse the process and do he FFS first and do a bit of living as a woman and then consider gender reassignment surgery.  Then again I think too many transgender women consider SRS the end of the gender journey when indeed it's just the beginning.

I have no idea if the transgender woman featured on this Cyrsti's Condo big screen video has gone through the change but she definitely did go through the facial surgery.  One way or another, she does have the benefit of a body which lends itself to the gender change.