Fashion Stages

Along the way perhaps you have heard of the term cross dresser puberty.  Loosely translated the term can be applied to a crosser  dresser or transgender woman of any age. The stereotypical example is the overweight guy at the mall teetering along in a micro mini skirt and heels typically worn by a teen aged girl.

 I too tried to dress that way into my mid 30's until I grew out of my adolescance the way most do- with  tons of pain and suffering! Much of my problem stemmed from comments on my "fabulous legs".  Nice of course but as I looked around, lots of men have good feminine looking legs- cross dressed or not.  My problem was and is-what are my two legs attached to?

I could write tons of words on the topic but where I was heading is- what is the next step we should take our fashion to?

I found a rather short and to the point look which came from Katie Couric and fashion expert Gretta Monahan:



"Dressing your age can be an ambiguous road to travel, as there is a fine line between a fashion choice that makes you look younger and clothes that are simply too young for you.

Fashion expert Gretta Monahan gave us tips for women to look and feel their best at any age. She encourages women to avoid giving a message of insecurity with their style choices –they should be comfortable with their age and stage in life. A woman in her 20s is going through what Monahan calls her "first impression period," so it is important to give the right impression and not "get trapped by the trends." Invest in one great trend piece -- a classic jacket or handbag -- and build a wardrobe that can be mixed and matched. Mixing your work and weekend wear is a must for a woman on the go in her 20s. And Monahan encourages women in their 20s to embrace their youth and have fun with their wardrobe.

The 30s are a time for a woman to make a sophisticated shift in her image. To do this, Monahan recommends having fun with necklines, whether it's a deep V-neck, a one-shouldered top or a strapless dress. As leather is timelessness yet trendy, Monahan says it's important to have a go-to statement leather piece such as a belt, cuff or cropped jacket. This is a time when women should avoid playing it safe.

When a woman enters her 40s, she should look for energizing colors and prints in figure- flattering shapes. Avoiding baggy and ill fitting clothes is essential, and women in their 40s should not be afraid to raise their hemline a little

As women enter their 50s, they should add versatile wrap dresses to their closet and keep their eye out for flattering three-quarter sleeved tops. Monahan recommends that as women age, they should tone down their makeup but add youthful touches to their hairstyle – such as highlights or bangs. This is the age to invest in a quality support bra and a well-fitted pair of jeans, avoiding "mom" jeans that tend to ride too high and have a tapered leg. Monahan’s overall tip for women and their fashion choices is to avoid being matchy-matchy – never match your handbag to your shoes or overcoordinate your accessories. This will age you no matter what stage of your life you are in As Monahan says, fashion is about presenting your best self and being comfortable with the woman you are – so have fun."

For more go here.

The Little Black Dress and the Trans Woman

Well girlfriends, there is damn " little"  about any part of my body but that doesn't stop me from coveting my own "dee-licious" fun version of a "little black dress"  Speaking of fun-check Sherry's version on the Cyrsti's Condo big screen:

Before and After HRT

Every once in a while here in Cyrsti's Condo I like to slide in a very good "before" and an even better HRT "after:

The Boy who Would be Queen?

Way back in "not so jolly" old England it seems there is a bit of an idea being discussed again over tea (or Ale) across the pond. Was the "Virgin Queen- Elizabeth I"  in reality a cross dressing male?  Nothing really new about this idea. Such "unknowns" as Bram Stoker of Dracula fame included the theory in his book "Impostors". Now there is a push to solve the mystery once and for all by opening the Queen's tomb and rooting around for DNA.   Here's  this story from  The GuardianOnline" :

"The bones of Elizabeth I, Good Queen Bess, lie mingled with those of her sister, Bloody Mary, in a single tomb at Westminster Abbey. But are they really royal remains — or evidence of the greatest conspiracy in English history? If that is not the skeleton of Elizabeth Tudor, the past four centuries of British history have been founded on a lie. And according to a controversial new book, the lie began on an autumn morning 470 years ago, when panic swept through a little group of courtiers in a manor house in the Cotswold village of Bisley in Gloucestershire."

To cut to the chase, The not so warm and fuzzy Henry VIII was coming to visit his daughter Elizabeth- who in fact was dead. The problem was her governess and guardian would most certainly face the King's wrath for "letting" his heir pass away.  Here's an example:

"They would be bound and dragged through the mud for a mile to the scaffold. There they would be hanged, cut down and disembowelled. Their entrails would be hauled from their bodies and held in front of their faces as they died, and then their limbs would be hacked off and displayed on spikes, to be picked bare by the birds."

No walk in the park to be sure and compounding their problems, there were no comparable young female matches in the village to Elizabeth, but - you guessed it. There was a boy from a local family called Neville. He was a gawky, angular youth a year or so younger than Elizabeth, who had been the princess’s companion and fellow pupil for the past few weeks. And with no time to look further afield for a stand-in, Parry and Lady Ashley took the desperate measure of forcing the boy to don his dead friend’s clothes. The deception worked and the two started in earnest to train the boy to be a princess.

My only comment , where's the problem here with Princess training?  The village kid probably always wanted to be a princess like most of us. Unlike most of us though,  we didn't all go on to be queens!

I've teased you enough with the story, go here for more.

Taking Pride

Around Cyrsti's Condo niche in the universe it's the time of year for all the LGBT Pride celebrations.  Dayton, Ohio's was almost a couple weeks ago, Yellow Springs is next weekend and the "bestest" of them all around here- Columbus, Ohio's is still a couple weeks away.

This is always a good time of the year to pause and try to reflect on where we "silent T's" sit in the overall scheme of things.

Ancestrally, we do have a tie in of sorts with the Drag Queens who were the original instigators at the Stonewall Bar in 1969. (right)

So many years later, it seems transgender women and men are finally beginning to make a case to be heard.

My own sense of participating in Pride this year is one of liberation.  I'm arriving at a point where I can stand alone and be recognized for what I am- a trans woman and for once not be lumped into other categories. Perhaps more importantly now, I can respect my cousins (drag queens and cross dressers) for what they are and feel good about it. As I hope they respect me.

Before I wrap this post up, I thought I would pass along another "historical" video from WigStock in NYC circa 2001.

Kristin Beck Speaks Out

CNN's Anderson Cooper 360 seems to have cornered the first Kristin Beck interviews I have been able to see.

Go here for an inside look how Kristin was able to live her life as a Navy Seal. Much of what she says sounds very familiar. If you were a transgender vet or not!

Gender Surfer

 62 year old Westerly Windina- One of Australia’s most iconic former surfers recently completed a six-year journey to become a woman, and has recovered from gender-reassignment surgery.

Definitely riding the "wild transgender surf"!

Coming Out to Yourself

What do all of these comments have in common with me?

"Just what we need, another old guy on hormones."
"If you waited until you were 60 to start transitioning, you are not a real transgender person."
"Isn't it too late in life to transition?"



What they have in common is all of them have been messaged to me here in Cyrsti's Condo.

Everyonce in a while, I find a very well presented answer:

"Realization that one is trans can take anywhere from a few moments to several decades. Usually, trans people have an inkling early on in their lives that their assigned gender feels out of sync with their bodies. The self-realization process is extremely complicated. The human mind does its best to help us survive, which can translate into triggering intense denial. Because of societal constraints, it is common for a person to try to ignore signs pointing toward transgenderism, whether consciously or unconsciously."

This is only one of several enlightening, educational thoughts on transgender women and men from a Huffington Post article here

Not so incidentally, the page also includes this link

to Outserve Magazine and a chance meeting between a transgender vet and  President Obama.

Much To Do - About Quite A Lot

Quite a week. Last night I attended the second of two hometown Equality meetings.

As I have written here in Cyrsti's Condo, this week I stepped from the shadows of my local stealth. Bottom line is, I have lived stealth in my home town for the last several years as I set out to build a whole new life in nearby larger cities. Nothing earth shattering about that but as my feminine life evolved into HRT and beyond- the more I walked the trans woman path the more I detested remnants of my former life in the shadows.

None of that mattered though as meeting time approached. Again I was suffering my usual amount of trepidation- for two reasons. Number one... I'm relatively certain the number of years I have dealt with the inner turmoil of gender dysphoria has left me scarred to a point I will go to the grave with it. In essence a deep fear of public rejection.  Number two... I have a deep inherent shyness around strangers which I have learned to cover fairly well but I have a tendency to come off as a real bitch. Luckily though I'm also a good actress in the sense the more nervous I become, the bigger my tendency is to chatter. A remnant from too many crummy business meetings over the years.

The good news is, as it turned out all my fear was a waste of energy.  I seriously can't remember a group of people going out of their way to make me feel welcome. As with most of my ventures, I was again the "token trans girl" in the room but it was cool. As I tried to tell them, I wanted and needed to bring a transgender view to the group. To "unsilence" the "T" in LGBT.

They were lucky! Last night, I was fairly quiet as my mind raced to interface my thoughts with their very active agenda-knowing full well I can make some sort of an impact-over a space of time.

So all in all, this week was another wonderful attempt to connect the dots in my life. Plus,  I finally feel better about "walking my talk".  I have to tell you I found the experience to be wonderfully liberating!

Thanks, to the Equality Springfield Ohio folks for helping it happen!