Hostility

I am normally a fairly easy going person, until recently it seems. As a matter of fact, since the election. What really fires me up is a self professed transgender woman, trans man or ally who voted for "45" (Trumper) in the election.  I for one, wasn't one to vote away my hard earned LGBT rights.

For those who thought they wouldn't get taken away, it is already happening under Trumps appointee to the Attorney General position. That's right-already. If you are in the latter category and don't care what's happening, that's your business, but if you do, there are places to resist and protest all this craziness. (Don't think the Russians weren't the smart ones in directing the election towards "45"?)

I hope there is more than one spot to register your resistance, but this is the one I just received in my email.

"I just signed this petition telling Congress to push back against the First Amendment Defense Act, legislation to codify discrimination against LGBTQ people into federal law. I think you should too. Will you sign too? https://act.credoaction.com/sign/FADA?referring_akid=a257598056.5201849.mWNnNI&source=conf_email Thanks."

Act NOW!

 

Much Needed Vocal Advice!

From Connie:

Although I really despise the sound of a woman who speaks with a vocal fry, I'm hearing it more and more - even among radio professionals. These women often include a toned-down valley girl kind of phrasing, especially at the end of a phrase or sentence. I have been experimenting with using just a tiny bit of the vocal fry, as it has little to do with the vocal chords' ability to create pitch or tone. It sure does force one to soften the voice because it hurts at a higher volume - unless you want to sound like the late actress, Selma Diamond, who was a chain smoker. 

As a singer, I have always tried to open up and project, even when being gravelly (the trick is to create the gravel in the sinus cavity and not in the throat). By cutting back on the projection, and using a touch of the gravel (or fry) for certain words, I am slowly improving my feminine voice. My pitch will never be high enough to be that of the average woman, but there are cis women who speak in a pitch similar enough to mine. I'm really a baritone who had tried to be a tenor for many years (popular music has few baritones), and my three-octave range moves more toward the low end than the high. Working on a little fry has helped, in that I don't have to think at all about vocal range to use it.

Thanks!!!

Voice Overs?

I have found personally one of my biggest MtF transition hurdles has been my voice.

Jacqueline Bisset

I am light years away from my ideal of a low sexy Jacqueline Bisset voice! 

While I know there are great voice coaches out there in the world, with my budget, I am limited to what I read on line to come up with a DIY slightly feminine voice.

I struggle also with the fact my voice is very gravely from my days as a (back in the day) "Top-40" disc jockey.

Regardless of all of that, Saturday, Liz and I were out shopping when I heard a distinctly male voice behind me talking. For no particular reason I turned around and there were no men behind us.

Immediately my "trans-dar" antennae went up and we let the couple pass with the male voiced person. Now, I know there are many women with very low voices, but I also know somewhere along the line cis-women have a distinctive way of phrasing/talking and this person didn't.

Of course there was no way I was going to say anything because the couple seemed engrossed in being grumpy with each other. I was just fascinated.

I did have a chance to look for an Adam's Apple to no avail (can't see mine either) and for other telltale signs. On the feminine positive side, she was wearing leggings and had to die for hip development but on the male negative side, she had a real male belly.

So who knows? Like passing ships in the night, I am sure we will never meet again. I just thought it was exceedingly rare for the possibility of another couple such as Liz and I to be in the same small store at the same time. Two transgender lesbians?  

Sorry!!!!

Originally posted:

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

A Cross Dressers Best Friend?

"Jessie Pierce" a self proclaimed "T-girl" shows off her best friend!!! Her mirror!!!

Ever Been "Made Over?"

One of every cross dressers earliest dreams is to have a cis woman make him over. Naturally, because a "real woman" has more expertise. Well, they do, on themselves. Plus they carry years of comments from Mothers, sisters and girlfriends. How could they not know more about the magic of make up?

When it comes to making up a male face, especially one they know well, very few are equipped to do a quality makeover.

I have been made over three times in my life, one in my "ancient" cross dressing days by an ex finance and the other two by make up professionals. One of which was not trying to sell me anything and one that was trying to sell me everything.

The first was in a motel room and achieved the fabulous fantasy I thought it would be, complete with shaved legs and lingerie. How I really looked? Who could say. I can only say our relationship was never the same (no matter what she said) and I could have looked like Bozo the clown's drag sister.

Completely opposite was the makeover I have written about here in Cyrsti's Transgender Condo a number of times. During one of the transvestite mixers I went to, they offered the services of a free makeover by a professional. All you needed was the courage to tuck away your ego in your girdle and do it. I did and could not believe the results! The person looking back at me in the mirror just couldn't have been me-but it was. I looked so good, I turned down a serious hit from a good looking man later that evening.

Finally, the makeover by a professional makeup sales woman was almost as good except she tried to sell me a variable ton of product I didn't need.

The blurry picture to the right is the only picture I have from any of the experiences.

So, when you are looking for a makeover and don't care about your finances, I would go the MaryKay or Avon route. Or even one of the department store counters and/or Mac.

Either way there are plenty of ways to be pampered with your own makeover.

I just don't think the normal spouse/girlfriend is the one to do it.

It's How you Carry Yourself that Counts!

I know a ton of transgender and even cis women who would die to look like many of the gorgeous trans women or even drag queens they see, but for most of us, it just won't be in the cards-in this life anyway.

In the meantime, a great alternative to being presentation obsessed is being attitude  obsessed. Not that you shouldn't always try to put your best foot forward as a trans woman (even if in heels or tennis shoes), the proper attitude can take you a long way. Let's check in with Connie:

(Recently) " I was approached, separately, by a trans man and a trans woman. Both of them were just beginning their respective transitions, and I can only guess that they felt the need to approach me because I looked as though I could be some sort of mentor to them. Although I was dressed for the work I was doing (jeans and T shirt), I do think I was presenting well. More than that, though, I think my confidence level just shows (maybe even via an aura?). Whatever it is, it has to be the same thing that either draws someone in or leads to the "scowl". 

As I've said many times before, my FFS is a Fast & Friendly Smile, and I will give one to anyone who makes eye contact with me. If I get a scowl in return, it's not my problem, but their's. In the two cases mentioned above, had I been dressed up in a dress and heels, I may not have seemed so approachable, but I still would have smiled!

No matter how dressed up a trans woman is, the one thing she should not forget to wear is a smile on her face! :-)"

The "smile" accessory was one of the earliest additions to presenting I learned when I started to navigate the feminine world. I faced (no pun intended) the fact that most of the world would "read" me but I was able to "disarm" them with a smile of my own.

If a person is predetermined not to like a transgender women, be a bitchy one to make sure they never will!

Gigi Goes Gaga Over a Girl

From People Celebrity:

After coming out as gay male in her teens and later as a transgender female, Gigi Lazzarato thought she was done coming out.

But that all changed when the YouTube sensation known as Gigi Gorgeous, 24, met model and activist Natalia “Nats” Getty, also 24, last February.

“It’s crazy how life takes you on these roads that you’d never expect,” Lazzarato says in the current issue of PEOPLE of coming out as a lesbian to her 2.4 million YouTube channel subscribers in September. “I never thought I’d fall for a girl. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

Gigi and "Nats"

Loiza Lamers

We recently ran the news about  the UK's first transgender Top Model contestant  and were remiss in leaving out the first trans woman on America’s Next Top Model, Isis King, who competed on cycle 11 and returned for the 17th ‘All-Stars’ season.

But, Holland’s Next Top Model was the first to be crowned the franchise’s trans winner, Loiza Lamers, in 2015.

Loiza Lamers

Isis King

Spoiled?

I hope I didn't ruin anybody's viewing experience on the "Gender Revolution", Katie Couric's transgender special on the National Geographic channel! Perhaps I should have put a spoiler alert except for Australia:

1. Brenda OliverFebruary 7, 2017 at 3:45 PM

   I found it interesting to find that the documentary was shown in Australia a bit over a week BEFORE it was shown in America.

   
   
2. 
   FABULOUSCONNIEDEEFebruary 7, 2017 at 4:53 PM

   I suppose that no spoiler alert was necessary for most of the trans world, then. I recorded it for viewing tonight, yet I was anticipating the SOS. Still, I watch these things just to see what the average person may have the opportunity to learn. There is a need to counteract the Jerry Springer-type shows, anyway.

   
   
3. Brenda, I have no idea of why the showing times would be that different, unless the shows were different and tailored specifically to Australians which would make sense to me. Maybe Jeni can comment on it (she is from Australia?)
4. Connie, as I mentioned before, this show could have major implications if it went further than "just speaking to the choir."
5. Finally, have you all heard the rumors of Saturday Night Live (45's fave show)  perhaps trying to line up Rosie O'Donnell to impersonate scary right winger Steve Bannon and Dennis Leary to play "alternate fact" guru Kellyanne Conway?  Only in America! (45 is Trumper)
6. I wish I could have used the "alternate fact" line on my parents when I was trying to work my way around the many tough spots I was in growing up!