Females Versus Women

Just received a great comment from Elizabeth about today's blog post "A Female, a Jack and a Queen."

So females somehow cannot reach their womanhood but you as a man in a dress can? Can you actually see the silliness in that comment since you are not actually a female nor are you a woman?

Silly old me. It seems I missed the redefinition along the way. Want to enlighten me?

OK Elizabeth, most would argue Cyrsti and enlightenment are contradictions in terms but I will try. First of all every day I woke up wondering what gender I was (for 50 years +) was not silly and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy...but....

First of all, maybe we can agree all females are not women and all males are not men.  In the same sense some of us the male birth persuasion were raised to a higher standard of what being a man was all about, I assume most girls were in a similar situation.  I can only say, my daughter spends a lot of on hands time with my grand daughter teaching her what the possibilities of being a woman in today's and tomorrow's world can be.  You are right, I can never be a female but on the other hand I'm working hard to be a better woman because I had 50 years to see all the mistakes females make.  I'm sure it does get a little unnerving to some females when they consider my background.  It does take a woman to accept me. So finally, define a woman to me and tell me why I will never be one? And please don't be silly and say a vagina makes you a woman.

I'm the first to admit I will never be a female-way too late for that.

OK, I didn't mean women "somehow couldn't reach their womanhood" as a blanket statement.  More precisely what I did mean was  females just having children- doesn't make them women.  Does a boy as a sperm donor make him a man?

Elizabeth,  I am overjoyed you brought this up. It is always a bottom line discussion I wish there was more of. You said it best...redefinition and you, I and everyone better be catching up to the reality of gender and sexual identity the younger generation is rewriting. 

Finally, I'm fairly certain I didn't enlighten you but I hope you understand my side more and I appreciate you commenting!!!!

Cyrsti's Condo "Power Scope"

Let's take a moment out of our busy days to look at our stars!!! Otherwise known as the "Power Scope" here in the Condo:


Libra- (September 23-October 22): There are many ways to misinterpret another’s good deed now, but do believe offers can come without strings and with pure support. Avoid thinking with your ego and see opportunities with an open heart. The future has more options than you want to see, so stop making suspicion your excuse to not make a major leap forward.

Certainly for me, NOT thinking with my ego is going to be a struggle. It is one however I am working with. Replacing a male ego with a feminine one is not an easy process!!!

Don't forget.  You can go here to theFrisky for your own "scope"!

A Female-a Jack and a Queen?

Over the years here in Cyrsti's Condo, as I have jumped through the hoops of MtF transitioning from cross dresser to HRT and a transgender life- it's been interesting to me how my outlook has changed towards genetic women and females.

As you regulars know, I draw a line between females and women.  Females are born into their gender - women are socialized.  Not long ago, I wrote a post which was in response to a comment about women not taking care of themselves and becoming just females again.

Drag Queen "Ivy Winters" 

At this point in my transition, I can understand why - and why not.  As an example, I "tweaked" what I was wearing to my second mammogram to my day outfit at Pride, my night outfit and back again the next day. Sure it takes a little work and a little planning, but the more I do it, the easier it becomes and I consider it a necessary part  of who I am. Interestingly on occasion, my friends step their game up too to meet me and this weekend I was even asked by one of my more femme lesbian friends what I was going to wear.

Yet another interesting dynamic to all of this is- how genetic women and females react with drag queens at drag shows.  Some are amazed, probably some are jealous but most all appreciate the work which goes into the guy to girl transformations on stage.  "Back in the day" such a point in time was a wonderful time for me to point out the differences between me as a cross dresser and them as drag queens.  They for the most part were cis gay males who scoffed at the idea of ever being women.  The process was too much work and why would they anyhow? I in turn, was forever trying to figure out how I could live a feminine life-the good and the bad.

Queens also get along with the average genetic women too because they don't have the sexual tension between them which makes life easier..The drag queens fulfill a need to be the center of attention and the women- a sense of curiosity.

For some reason, the females who never make it to woman hood somehow are stunted in their growth and never have a chance to explore all the layers available to them.  The point alone, makes the subject tough to take for those of us who couldn't wait to do just that!

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Our feature cover today is the MtF transsexual beauty from Greece, Jenny Hiloudaki.

Generational Gender?

I wrote in my Cyrsti's Condo "Columbus Pride" recap post of how for the most part I was utterly invisible to the 20 and even 30 somethings in the crowd.  I said at the time I guessed the only peeps who paid any attention to me were 40 something women.

It's certainly no secret, the younger the generation is, the less they really care about gender unless their parents are making them haters.  Plus, I'm sure that bunch on Saturday had way more to worry about than staring me down-such as finding the right place to party!

After all the worry I put into being the social director for our little group, it was fun to just disappear into the crowd and not worry about educating any number of people about who I was.  Plus I was treated to even being "embraced" in a couple of the non gay places we went.  I rate my experiences as being tolerated, accepted and then embraced at the top of the list.

I can't say I'm jealous of the world our younger transgender women and men are operating in now but at the least I can say I wish it would have been around "back in the day".  Maybe then, I wouldn't have been so apt to be stoned and drunk out of my mind trying to lose myself to the music of Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. 

Speaking of those days, this coming weekend, Columbus, Ohio is having a street fair called "Community Fest" which is "rumored" to be quite the collection of old hippies my age.  I don't think I can make it though due to several factors, but it sure would be fun to have a chance to go back to the hippie girl days I so missed.

It would be interesting to see if the women in my generation ever caught up to the fact of what a transgender person is and we are not to be stared or smirked at.  Maybe they can learn from their daughters.

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Our feature cover today is the striking MtF transgender woman Kayla Ward.  HRT and a little surgery here and there has been kind to Kayla!

Cyrsti's Condo "What If?"

I told you baby- Some of those mean old men may want you to do more than just clean the house!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

"Ker Plunk!!! a rather late edition of our epic "Sunday Edition!"

Page 1.- Columbus Ohio Pride.  I'm thinking about now, I'm part of nearly a half million TGLBQ Pride celebrants in Columbus, Ohio- who are nursing hangovers-from yesterday.  Yes, the attendance was estimated at a cool half a mill. (Who does that?)

From my personal viewpoint, a good time was had by my intrepid group of four and I have only one crummy picture to show for it, but I'm passing it along anyhow. The guy who took the picture was just as messed up as the picture looks and is actually the best he could do before I took my phone back.

The weather actually wasn't hateful for this time of year and stayed in the low to mid 80's for the hottest part of the day.

The parade itself, started late and was very long, so I think we watched maybe a third of it before we headed back to the outside patio venue you almost see above.  I'm not a huge parade fan and got to see George Takei  actor from the original Star Trek and who has probably been "beamed up" from more gay pride parades than anyone in history!

Page 2.- Transgender Vets.  I was really surprised to see a Pride Color Guard actually kicking off the parade. I was so surprised I didn't get a picture of the one cop of three Columbus policemen saluting the flag and the group.

As promised, I wore my T-shirt my partner Liz designed for me which said "I'm proud to have fought for your rights which were denied to me."  I really didn't get much response except for one really drunk guy who never understood anyway.  No one even came close to labeling me with the Tra--y gender slur so the closest I came to problems was when I bitched out a couple for cutting the line at the "Porta Potties".



Page 3.- Who were those People?  At my age, it seems like everyone at an event like this weekend are young enough to be my kids - or worse yet my grand kids.  There were however a significant group of peeps outside of the TGLBQ community who came to support, party or just watch the show.  Ironically, my friends and I were surprised how much of a show there wasn't.

I went expecting groups of garish drag queens sweating off their makeup in the heat and half naked buffed gay guys milling around in the crowd.  Perhaps since we are in the relative conservative "Heartland" U.S.A., the only drag queens we even saw were on parade floats.  I did see one other transgender woman during the day, one cross dresser at night with another trans girl.  Needless to say, I certainly didn't check out 500,000 people, but I was looking. Per norm, I did get my share of looks and mostly from the middle aged women who were there and very little from the younger crowd.

Page 4.- The Back Page.-  I had a great time attending a very serious TGLBQ Pride event and the Goddess willing I can do it again next year.  As I have mentioned, Columbus is very diverse, and the community there has built itself into a commercial force.  It is simply financially advantageous for a business to be pro Pride and it showed!

"Mud Roller"

Ever heard of the term "mud roller" applied to a woman?

Back in the day in my high school (before electric lights) "Mud Roller" was a term applied to a girl in school most likely to get "down and dirty" with a guy.

The name wasn't particularly a bad one, except normally the girl in question probably wasn't going to be the one you brought home to meet Mom-unless you were me.  I don't think I was ever popular enough to bring home a "roller" but I did bring home a real live witch with curly red hair (to her waist) to say Hi to Mom.  Mom got the whole wrong impression-all I wanted was to have hair like hers!

In one of my searches , I just found a picture of a "roller" on one of the transgender / cross dresser sites, I just had to pass along!

I don't know how this person identifies but for now we will say he nailed the description perfectly...I could go farther but this a PG rated post!