A Day in the Life

Yesterday was one of those days you spend years sort of planning for- and hours thinking about as they approach. When I look back at literally all the time I wondered if I could and wonder how it would be to go "full time" and live as an "out" transgender woman. 

Liz was off and had a doctors mammogram appointment. I went along and benefited from what I call a "contact estrogen buzz" in the office from all the other women in the waiting room. From what Liz said it's a much more of a factory like demeaning process in the bigger hospital she goes to. I had mine in a much smaller one.

From there we came back briefly to have a little lunch before we drove the 70 miles or so up to Dayton to my daughters house. I made plans to not have to change clothes much if not at all during the day until Liz gave me a wonderful pair of black jeans she had found for me, so what was a trans girl to do? Easy answer? Wear them to a lesbian get together we were going to last night up in Dayton. The evening was significant in that it was the first time I had seen my "old friends" Nikki and Kim and I was going into an alcohol based venue since my drinking ban was instituted.

So, ideally, the outfit I was wearing had to have a little "pizzazz"  to it-without looking like I was trying too hard. 

On the positive side, my daughter wasn't going to be home (in Hawaii) but her Mother in Law was going to meet with with my VA meds I was coming by for. She has met me in social situations a couple times but we have never really have had a chance to sit and talk very much one on two with Liz and I. She did well and cut the miss-pronouning almost totally out. Of course the grand kids were the grandkids. One had band practice, one was fooling with some sort of computer part and the youngest? Well, no one really knows.

From there it was off on another 20 miles to meet the group. The whole time the clique "You don't need alcohol to have fun." was echoing in my noggin. Well obviously I didn't but much of my past was built around a party. Plus all the other tangents which were involved with drinking while trans. Which could fill another post.

I have to tell you, I loved seeing Kim and Nikki and was accepted by the group-but no booze did affect me. But obviously I will get over it and found Ginger Ale with a lime was OK.

As it turned out, we still weren't done and had to drive another 20 miles east to Springfield to pick up things and check my old house before coming back to Cincinnati.

By the end of all of that, my goal was achieved to put together an outfit which could be comfortable plus be "up scaled" a bit with make up. 

The whole day was exactly how I imagined it so many years ago. I was never sure though, if I could have ever imagined doing it.

Life As We Know it Now.

I was thinking it has been awhile since I have tried to update 'Y'all' about what's going on with me. Actually not much. But, if you missed it, I did actually stop my estrogen patches on Sunday. Since that time (For whatever reason) I have managed to cry about everything it seemed. Not sure it means anything yet. 

Health wise, I am feeling better, but won't know any real news until later next week when I go to my endocrinologist. I have found I can go on the VA on line health site for my records then compare them with the diagnosis with on line medical text books-and they matched. The diagnosis was doing phlebotomies  - or as one Doctor said "Change out my oil." As of now, I am into the second of a possible six appointments. 

Now, on we go into why we are here. What's happening with that pesky transgender deal you have going on Cyrtsi? It's been tough to describe but I feel internally I have gone stealth. I am just me. Externally, some days my passing privilege seems to working and life is a bit easier than others. On those other days (like anyone else) I want to strangle many of the rude ignorant peeps I run into.

Other than that, by FAR, Fall is my fave season of the year and it is beginning nicely. Sunny days and highs near 80. 

In my case lately, slower is better and my goal is to adjust to it!

Duke Leads the Way

Recently I noticed Duke opened one of the few centers for gender-related disorders (in the Southeast),on July 15.

Hunter

Not surprisingly, parents like Mac and Katy Schafer of Raleigh say they don’t know what they would have done without the help they found at Duke. 

Their daughter Hunter, who transitioned from male to female as a teenager, needed hormone treatments, and without Duke there would have been nowhere else to go.

The center was founded by Deanna Adkins, the endocrinologist who treated Hunter. The Center for Child and Adolescent Gender Care, which opened in July, is the first of its kind in North Carolina.

The post goes on to mention the extremely high suicide transgender rate and the fact puberty blockers have been found to be reversible- to give a young trans person the chance to make a quality decision on a huge issue!
Read more here.

Reminders!

We're 8 months out from the Congressional Election and I'm asking for your help.  Your small donation will go a long way to helping me achieve the best improvements in Employment, Education, Energy and the Environment!

Do what you can!!!



And: Sunday here in Cyrsti's Condo, I promised to pass along a link to a film project which involves a transgender character-which if it gets funded will be played by a trans actress:

It's called "Strictly Taboo."


https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/strictly-taboo-a-film-noir-transgender-love-story#/story

Parenting 101

Recently I found this little tid bit of huge parenting advice passed along by a transgender server Liv Hnilicka in Minnesota to a little girl. From Cosmopolitan:

In the post,(Hnilicka) describes the interaction,"which involved the dad coming up to her and saying, "My daughter just asked if you were a boy or a girl. I didn't want to speak for you so would you like to talk to her?"

Hnilicka then went over to the table and told the little girl that she liked her hair ribbon and answered her question with, "I heard you asked if I was a boy or girl. I think the important thing to remember is that everyone can be anything they want to be in this world. And it's also important to try to be the best selves we can be for our family and friends. And even to strangers. So to answer your question, I was told that I was a boy when I was little and now I live my adult life as a girl. It sounds complicated but it's actually pretty simple. Do you have any questions for me?" 

The little girl then smiled at her and said, "Nope!" 

Hnilicka went on to write: she wanted to post the story publicly for a multitude of reasons, one of which was that it was very different from the types of interactions she usually has with strangers. 
"Just this morning I was waiting for the bus and this man walked by me and kept smiling at me and then finally said, 'Cut that faggoty shit out.' And I'm like, 'I'm just in the world; I'm just waiting for the bus. It doesn't have to be this big conflict.' So yeah, this interaction was so out of the ordinary that I felt like I needed to run to the mountain top and shout it to the world. Clearly it's resonated with people.

YES!!!

Just the Transgender Facts Mam

Darla Lannert served two tours of duty in Vietnam as Rick Lannert. “Trust me, I never chose this. People don’t choose to be humiliated, have their life threatened, lose their family and friends,” she says.

As you all probably know, I am a trans vet-a draft induced Vietnam Era vintage one. Yesterday, I saw these figures which I found interesting and of course wanted to pass along to all of you.

These come from the Wisconsin Journal Sentinel:   

1. 12,800-the estimate of active duty trans military members.
2. Transgender people are twice as likely to serve in the military as the general population.
3. According to an UCLA Study, an estimated one in five transgender women or men are trans.
4. Read more here!

Cyrsti's Cotndo "Sunday Edition"

Ker Plunk! Listen up! Another Sunday Edition is hitting your virtual front porch. Around here, Momma Nature is doing her best to provide a beautiful cool fall Sunday morning along the Ohio River in Southwestern Ohio. In fact I'm taking advantage of her gift by writing this morning outside. Let's get our "Cup o Joe" and get started!

Page One-The Week that Was or Wasn't: The surprise of the week for me was the Thursday "Dr. Phil" Show transgender episode.I was completely surprised when Dr. Phil "counseled" a young trans woman's step father concerning her transition-which in my book she was managing to destroy in every conceivable way she could. In fact, it took a visit from transgender Navy Seal Krisitn Beck to provide real insights.My fave moment came when Step Dad in a moment of ultra confusion called Kristin an "it".  Dr. Phil cautioned him later never call a Navy Seal an "it"-he could get kicked over the roof.

Page Two.- "Movin Picture Shows": Friday night after my speaking engagement, Liz and I had a chance to see a new "movin picture show" which was just opening called "Grandma". All I can really tell you about the movie is we enjoyed it immensely, it stars Lily Tomlin and transgender actress Lavern Cox has a role. 

Also, yesterday I received a message in one of my emails concerning a "Romance/Murder Mystery" which involves a trans "protagonist." At the beginning of the message and link, I was dismissing it out of hand-until-I read more about it. So, in a later post, I will pass along the link to the project and you can make your own decision. At this point, I can only say (from what I have seen) the movie will walk a fine line between the interaction between a transgender woman and her "admirer."

Page Three: Opinion: It's been a big Sunday edition this week as we deal with all sorts of contentious trans issues. Let's throw in another and call it "Shape Shifting." That's right-shape shifting. Friday night at the "Love Must Win" get together, another transgender woman named "Steph" (as I mentioned) spoke also. Her story was vastly different than mine in many areas yet so similar in others. The biggest similarity came when she said her journey to her present was not as clear cut as many of the trans kids (like Jazz Jennings) are today. Similar to my story. She also detailed briefly her cross dressing years- Still perceived as a negative somehow by trans "purists"." As I normally do, I began to backtrack in my noggin the next day about our "cross dressing" years and how I could even explain them somehow as my "shape shifting years." We will see.

Page Four: The Back Page: Today did mark a sad milestone in my life as I removed my last estrogen patches from my body. On the positive side, I have steeled myself to the point of living longer is my ultimate goal. If by chance the opportunity to begin estrogen again comes my way again-great. If it doesn't, at least I can thank my Goddess for letting me live it for awhile.

In the meantime, I hope you all have a wonderful day and as always-thanks for taking your valuable time and stopping by Cyrsti's Condo. "Luv ya" all!!!

Love MUST Win!

Last night was my speaking engagement in Burlington, Kentucky for a group called "Love Must Win!"  I was told it went well-even to the point of a couple in the group used the "I" word with me - inspirational.

Truthfully, while I was deeply humbled and flattered, "inspirational" goes right with "bravery" in my book as words I find hard to accept. I have seen and known many "first responders" and military members who are truly brave. I have just done what I needed to survive-before it was too late for me. 

Personally, I was inspired by so many others last night telling their stories. For the most part, 20 something gay guys telling brutal stories of growing up in very un-understanding families. These were the people who opened their group and invited myself and another transgender woman to talk about our pasts.

Sarah, the other trans woman, also survived a brutal past.

For my part, I am a survivor because of age. I told them all, I am living proof the light at the end of the tunnel is not the train. You may not get by unscathed but get by you can. Sure, I tried to oft myself actively and passively but Hey! look, I'm still here.

Until I heard from all the others though, I didn't realize how totally I would be speaking to the choir. After I heard their stories, it is no wonder so many LGBT youth try suicide as the only way out.

Love just has to win-what would John Lennon say?

Transgender Veteran Care

I try to pride myself in passing out praise as much as I am negative. Which I have to admit has been tough lately...but infinitely doable. Especially yesterday at my latest Veterans Administration appointment. 

I'm up now to giving regular blood labs first and then going over to hematology to give a pint. Hopefully if this works, I will only be scheduled for two to four more.

The reason I am writing this post is, I simply can't believe how nice they all are to me. I was greeted as "Ms" Hart and pronouned correctly all the way.

Hopefully, they all are just treating me so well because I trans-not because of my illness!!!!

Whatever the reason, I plan on carrying the theme on through into my speaking engagement tonight.

The bottom line is, the world does not have to accept or understand us any further than knowing we didn't have a choice with any of this- Transgender, gay, lesbian or whatever.

What we do have a choice in though, is how the world treats us.  Kristin Beck said it again yesterday: (I paraphrase) If we (trans women and men) aren't trying to kill ourselves-we are trying to do it ourselves in record numbers. Tragic.

Ending this post on a positive note, I am fairly sure no one from the Dayton, Ohio VA hospital reads Cyrsti's Condo-but if you do-THANKS!!!