Cyrsti's Condo Virgin Toes?

Tomorrow night I will go through another feminine "rite of passage" of sorts. As always, I am a little late for the party but I will make it none the less. (I hope!!!)

Liz and I are going on a mini "girl's night out"  complete with a pedicure. We can't do the classic "mani-pedi" because my hands are still healing from whatever has ravaged them. Tuesday, I have an appointment with yet another doctor. This time a dermatologist. 

The last couple of summers, I have developed an affinity for wearing sandals/flipflops. At the same time I have been able to perfect an amateur pedicure of sorts. But, never the real deal.

My problem is of course I am highly worried about the perception of my "less than dainty" feet. Liz simply says my feet are certainly not small but proportioned well. She has always pointed out (often) size has less to do with passing privilege as proportion- One reason for the need for quality padding around the hips for most of us to offset our shoulders. And, another mistake overzealous beginning cross dressers make when they over compensate immediately in the "boob" department.

As always, I digress and I have been directed to "prep" tonight and at least shave my legs from the knees down (really?) Plus, I have been researching the number of women I see who do not have exactly fashion model feet, so I won't be as shy about mine. 

So I believe tomorrow night will be one of those feminine rights of passage similar to my first visit to a salon to get my hair done. I am excited and at least Liz will be with me so I shouldn't get lost.

Philippine "Garage Band?"

So, that's what you have been doing with your spare time?
Thanks Bobbie :)

Trans Passing Privilege with a Capital "P"!

Pejic left and Swift right.

I know the last couple posts here in Cyrsti's Condo have dealt with trans women (mostly young) with tons of passing privilege. Now, I know many of you are like me and are just doing your best to get by in the feminine world-But! I do love to dream and marvel at the transitions I see with many Mtf transgender women.

Of course in that category is trans supermodel Andreja Pejic, who by the way turned up on stage with Taylor Swift as part of her BFF Squad.


Australian-born Pejic, 23, is the world's most famous trans model and was recently featured in AmericanVogue. Pejic is also the first transgender model to land a cosmetic campaign. 

I will never say her (Pejic's) appearance with Swift helps me in any way with my life but it sure looks like fun!!!

Cyrsti's Condo Cover Girl of the Day

Kim Petras

With all the recent publicity 14 year old transgender girl Jazz Jennings is getting these days, it's hard to believe it seems 20 something trans German singer/writer Kim Petras has been around forever!

If you recall, Petras was very adamant that her gender had always been female. In an interview about her surgery she stated "I was asked if I feel like a woman now - but the truth is I have always felt like a woman - I just ended up in the wrong body".

"Us" is "Who?"

In an extension of sorts from a previous Cyrsti's Condo post - an in depth look at the confusing and ever evolving list of terms to describe "us". Let's do who!

Now, with the ever growing explosion of transgender programming on television, many of us have had to pause and consider again where we fit in. Since I am writing this, lets take me for an example. The easiest is Caitlin Jenner. We both describe ourselves as transgender women but I will never have the privilege she has. Or, how about Laverne Cox? Again we both are trans and I deeply admire her work and public presence-but I will never be able to totally understand her experience of growing up black in the deep South. Then there is Carly on Becoming Us. She probably comes closest to me as far the social-economic side of life goes but again something about her just leaves me cold. I mean did she develop that annoying giggle as she transitioned? Sorry Carly.  (Liz told me I was just a bitch.)

By now you are probably asking "Cyrsti, just who do you like?" Actually, I like all of it. (except Zoey Tur of course.) How cool is it to be even having this conversation?

And now, 

This Summer, Let Your Voice Be Heard

The 2015 U.S. Trans Survey will be available to complete beginning in August. Until then, get involved in promoting the survey and join our mailing list below. You'll be the first to know when the study is available to complete, and the first to see the results.

This is actually a big deal as more of us stand up to be counted!!! 

And don't worry, I am just a cynic not  bitch! Liz!!!

The Definitive Guide to---Us?

"Us" is similar to "they." The faceless minions in the world, not in the new movie.

If you use "us" as in the TGLBQ community, it's a serious deal especially to civilians. After all in a previous recent Cyrsti's Condo post, Connie and I discussed using the "she" pronoun at all when referring to Zoey Tur.

Perhaps you remember the Simmons College "SocialWork@Simmons" Blog we participated with here in the blog. Now Simmons is passing along a "Gender and Sexuality - Defining Terms for Everyday Use."

Here is the intro:  "Navigating the dialogue that surrounds gender and sexuality can be difficult. The terminology used by and for individuals along the gender spectrum is specific, and preferred usage can vary from individual to individual. Consider the acronym LGBT, which stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender. It’s used all the time in phrases like “LGBT community” and “LGBT rights.” Yet, some people and groups include a “Q” in the acronym to stand for questioning, while others include an “I” to stand for intersex. The language is adaptable and it is always evolving."

Since it is incredibly complex for "us" I can only imagine how confusing it is for "them."

Thanks for checking in Megan (on my email) and Chris for his work on the blog. Follow the link for an in depth look. 

Perhaps of all the terminology, "evolving" is the most profound.

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day."

Yes...this is me!!!

Gender-izing a Belt?

This is sort of a cute story that happened Saturday. Here in Cyrsti's Condo numerous times I have mentioned my partner Liz's 89 year old Dad. It's safe to say during his life, he has never been known as a card carrying liberal-as referenced by the bear he hunted years ago and the ultra light plane he was building (until his health gave out) in the garage.

Over my five years or so with Liz, I have been involved in all the small family events and helping to take him around to his medical appointments - including an amazing set of cataract operations. When he started the four operations on both eyes, essentially he was legally blind, now he is increasingly close to 20/20.

Along the way, I have told Liz when he begins to see me-there will be questions. After all, when you get to be 90-you can ask anything you want.

Saturday when we were in the optometrist store getting him fitted for glasses, I was making sure he got out of his walker and into a chair. Suddenly he looked straight ahead at my belt and said "Is that a girl belt, or a boy belt and then paused and said one of those gay boy belts?" I softly leaned in and said "it's a girl belt, Jim."

Now, as we all know this transgender life presents interesting twists. In my case, Liz has never really talked to Dad about my true genderality. On some occasions he will call me Chris and others Cyrsti and add in a "hon" or even a doll.

Being the loving and giving person I am, I told Liz he is your Dad and the time is coming for a transgender sit down. Daughter dearest-are you a lesbian or what?  Because now he can see me and hear me as long as he can find his hearing aids!

Zoey Tur -The Doc and More

Connie called me to task concerning a recent post I wrote here in Cyrsti's Condo concerning two individuals who I think at the least are out to make a "living" of sorts from the transgender community. One is Dr. Drew-the other Zoey Tur (a self professed trans woman). From Connie:

"I don't watch Dr. Drew; I just read about this incident. Is Dr. Drew really transphobic? Obviously, Ben Shapiro is. However, I'm going to take you to task again, because we transgender people should not also be passing judgement on each other. (she)? You recently posted that there is no one right way to transition - but does that mean there are wrong ways? I would agree that Zoey is somewhat an embarrassment, based on what I have seen of her, and she certainly is taking a different path of transition than I.

 However, if I am living in the hope that I will be received by the world in a civil manner for my gender identity, I must also do the same for anyone else's. After all, if we transgender people know that our gender identities are not a matter of choice, then we should respect that - even if a person demonstrates what we have determined to be subsequent acts that are based on choice. So, you might say, "Zoey Tur - she is an asshole", but the "she" should not be "(she)". The "asshole" could even be capitalized, however."

Connie, there are probably only one person who knows for sure if he is transphobic and that is Dr. Drew himself-or is he simply another talking head asking questions for ratings. As far as Zoey Tur goes, I believe you all should know by now what I think about Zoey (less than zero) and I will direct you to a show between the Doc and Zoey here. Ben Shapiro is not really worth my words or energy.

Finally, as far as calling Tur a "she" I thought about not doing it but went ahead. After all, there are plenty of generic's I meet who don't deserve the pronoun.