I am Just a Blank Page

Several times here in Cyrsti's Condo recently I have mentioned my upcoming workshop at this years Trans Ohio Symposium. Surprising, I remember my pledge to myself and Liz last year to be less of a "talking transgender head" jabbering away in front of a group of mixed people. By mixed I mean a predominance of "more mature" questioning transgender or "exploring" cross dressers mixed with spouses searching for a little look at what could be one of the biggest decisions of their lives. Changing gender.

The process is especially difficult as we know for many of us seniors who have spent a life with (what I just heard it called) testosterone poisoning. Precious passing privilege is tough to come by. All of those factors combine to make me an unlikely or maybe highly likely trans woman to talk about all of this.

First of all, the Trans Ohio Symposium percentage wise has fewer "older" attendee's and even fewer of those who identify as a woman. The weekend conference is heavily balanced towards a younger group and many of them transgender men. But that's all good. I don't need an auditorium full of people to fulfill some sort of an ego trip. Just a few connections would be fulfilling. Realistically I know we senior transgender women could be the largest segment of the entire trans spectrum still heavily closeted.

So, this year, instead of the convoluted agenda I submitted for approval; I am going to pass out a blank piece of paper and pencil to everyone. On the paper of course they need to write down what they want to learn from the hour.  (My last two workshops have been the quickest hours of my life.)  Plus, I am going the extra distance to offer my partner Liz as an extra contact to spouses and significant other generics. What else is she going to do? (Kidding) Also, I am going to print a "before" picture of me from the blog-so attendee's can see how far (or not) I have come.

I look at it this way. I have no problem of jabbering for an hour on the whys and hows of my Mtf transition and still miss someone's most important question. HRT alone can fill an hour!

At the least-we will see how many of the attendees ask for my crayons!

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Ker Plunk! The Mother's Day edition has hit your virtual front porch! It's a beautiful warm Sunday here in Southwestern Ohio but I know approximate 50 tornadoes hit the center of the country yesterday-so I pass along good vibes and safety to all of you! Let's get started!

Phote:Jay Dunn

Page One: The Week that Was-or Wasn't: Once again we went on the transgender roller coaster ride with trans youth. Tragically, yet another transgender young woman was bullied into committing suicide while Angie Esteban became Salinas High's (California) first transgender student to be crowned prom queen.

Even though we keep taking the step forward and then a step backwards- the one constant is, we are not going away.


Page Two: Mama's Day.- Here we are again, it's Mother's Day and as my Mom always said "Life is like a roll of toilet paper-the closer you come to the end-the faster it goes." 

Very simply, we all have a very special link to our Mothers' some good-some not so much. I have also told you all the story of when I came out to my Mom as a transvestite and she recommended electro shock therapy. It took me years (she has been gone for 20 years) to come to my own peace with her. In fact, I am going to use her name as my middle name when I change my gender markers. Why? Let's use Leelah Alcorns Mom as an example. 

When you compare the times we came out, the information base was so different. At the least my Mom would never had access to the info Leelah's Mom had. Of course, there will be no way to ever tell. So Mom-thanks for fighting through all the birthing problems you had before me. (And trying again!)  Thanks Mom, for instilling into me the basic moral compass I have and the will power to finally be who I am. You probably won't agree with the paths I took but I think you would have agreed with your final result! 

Page Three: The Back Page.-  Again I hope where ever you may be, I hope you are safe and sound! This week, again I'm hoping to play with some minor layout changes here in Cyrsti's Condo! Thanks for stopping by to take a look!

No One Does it Better?

On Friday night the annual Miss Tiffany Universe competition took place, an event which was also shown on Thai National TV Channel 7.

The Beauty pageant, which features only transsexuals, featured 30 contestants from around Thailand who battled to become the 2015 winner.

After 3 hours of competition, the winner was announced and won 120,000 Baht in cash, a new car and other prizes, totaling over 1 Million Baht. The lucky winner was Khun Sopidar aged 22, a student at the Rachapat University in Ayutthaya Province.

PBS  I was fortunate enough to be able to catch Kumu Hina.  

It tells the story of Hina Wong-Kalu, a transgender hula teacher. She brings to life Hawaii's traditional embrace of of manu - or those who embody both male and female spirit. 

It is yet another tie in with many ancient/tribal twin spirit traditions which have been so tragically forgotten. Often to the point of religious motivated violence. Also, to those of you who think too many transgender documentaries are tied to those with tons of passing privilege-this is not it. 

Follow the link above for more! 

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl of the Day"

Yasmine Petty is an American trans woman model of Moroccan and Italian descent.  She (Petty) mostly works as a runway and editorial fashion model.

Can't I Be the Butch?

With all due apologies to the multi layered lesbian community, yesterday, I wanted to and got to be the "butch" in Liz and I's relationship. (She is generic and identifies lesbian.)

She was off from her job yesterday and after we finished a few chores she asked if I wanted to take the dogs for a walk.

I said sure, just give me a second to put earrings on plus a tiny bit of makeup and off we went.

Life is good.

Dancing Around the Maypole?

Getting my groove on dancing around the "Maypole", These people are so incredibly kind and embracing I am always astounded every time Liz and I go.

I am sure they were equally astounded by my "dancing" ability!

Sweating the Details

With summer weather around now for many of us, here in Cyrsti's Condo we have been looking just a bit at the effects of the season on us.

First of us, where you happen to identify or have progressed on the HRT ladder means a lot,  Back when I was struggling through my cross dressing years, the warm days of the year were a struggle. I had to wear long sleeves due to arm hair and my make up seemed to run off as fast as I applied it. It was tough. 

I was able to shave my legs before removing any of my arm hair, so the first clothing item I could shed were my hot panty hose and be able to "air cool" my legs and then shop-shop-shop for any sheer tops I could find. 

As far as makeup went, I just tried to go from one air conditioned place to another and do a "touch up." Most of the time I still felt like a wax candle left out in the sun to soften and melt.

As I have transitioned though, summer has become more "user friendly" for me. Starting at the bottom and moving up, I wanted and needed to put more emphasis on my feet if I wanted to wear sandals.  My legs became easier to keep up on since HRT has decreased my body hair (except beard.) As I mentioned my arms became the same way.

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My beard never really changed. I would love to start electrolysis at some point at time-when I can afford it. In the meantime, I am fortunate to have never had a ton of beard growth and what I have is gray. A close shave and I am good for the day.

Overall, the biggest impact of warmer weather is how my body accepts it. I have written how HRT has destroyed my internal thermostat. Now being cold (really cold) in the winter equates out to being able to more comfortable in the summer.

So from fashion to living a full time feminine life summer this year is looking warm and inviting.

Casper - The Furry Ghost

It's 80 degrees around here this week and (to quote an old advertising slogan)- my number one fashion accessory becomes my skin. 

I have a problem. Recently, my partner Liz with all the kindness and gentleness she could muster said "So, what are you going to do with all that "fur" on your skin? And. oh by the way, what did you do with the "Jergens" Natural Glow moisturizer I got you????

"Nuff said!" I know she is fairly sure I need a brick up the side of the head to get my attention: But this time I caught the meaning immediately I may want to rid myself of body hair and Casper the Winter Ghost skin. All of it is extra important this summer (as I have written here in Cyrsti's Condo) because I see this summer as my biggest "coming out" party yet.

Of course doing all the hair removal prep is just a matter of not procrastinating. Plus, since I never wear panty hose of any kind, I need to do an extra better job. It's not like I wear short skirts of any kind but I do have several "fave" longer skirts which feel great with shaved legs and no hose. 

Then, there are the pesky under arm areas to take care of plus the remainder of my arm hair which HRT hasn't taken care of.

So, once again, this girl "thang" ain't easy as any generic will tell you but I can only say I'm thrilled beyond words to be able to transition into this summer. My diet has actually helped to give me a real live feminine shape too. I am like a kid with a new toy, or at least one just back from the repair shop.

Casper doesn't really scare me much either. After all just think of everything else I have been through on my transgender journey.  Many other things were much scarier! 

Yahoo has a whole beauty link to having no hair! See it here.