Cyrsti's Condo "Gender Blender"

Meet Kyle Farmery described as a New York City night life "princess."

Activism versus Advocacy?

Recently, I have written seemingly tons of posts here in Cyrsti's Condo concerning the Leelah Alcorn tragedy and it's aftermath.  And- I have received tons of response too.  The difference for me now is, I am receiving input not only through the blog but also through places such as Facebook,  Google+ and through personal interaction.  Even my personal interaction is different because of all the different groups I'm interacting with. For the most part, no one I have run into has ever encountered another transgender person.

On Google+, Jenny sent me a great comment questioning (among other things) the true reasons certain individuals or groups of peeps are now jumping on the transgender "band wagon." Specifically she used my example of the mayor of Dayton, Ohio speaking at the recent Leelah Alcorn vigil. Why and were there hidden political reasons? I believe she did feel terrible about the tragedy but yes it is true - Dayton has an ever growing strong LGBT presence. I'm sure an "advisor" was speaking to her political need to be there.

Certainly, I can't speak to the longevity of any political support-except to say- both mayoral candidates in Dayton supported LGBT groups.  To the most jaded of you all (included me) I say-follow the money!  While so many of the well heeled bible thumpers have concentrated on building castles, LGB groups have been building communities. All of the sudden, we "T"s are becoming visible.  Tragically, Leelah never realized how close she was.

Also, around central and southwestern Ohio at least, all any city of any size only has to look at the example of the very diverse LGBT society in Columbus, Ohio as a model of economic success.  A subject for another post!

So, I think when considering the longevity of any transgender acceptance movement, you have to "follow the money." In my geographic area (which is considered far less than liberal except for Columbus) the more trans women and transgender men who are able to establish themselves in jobs, the more advocates we will have and the fewer activists we will need.

OMG!!! Am I Turning into My Mother?

One of the most common terms I hear from generics my age or less is "I am turning into my mother!" I assume they are telling the truth because I never met their Moms and the whole idea is bad.  On the other hand, I have met mine and yes, there are more than a few interesting comparisons.

First of all,  some of us resemble our Mom's.  In my family, it was clear from the beginning-my brother resembled my Dad while I resembled Mom. I know that alone does not make the person transgender. Most of us go on to grow and be masculinized -a "male" version of her.  Early pictures of her Dad made it clear where my genetics came from.

I'm sure generics feel the same way when they look in the mirror and I know they do when they act a certain way and  I'm beginning to feel the same.  All of a sudden, I am seeing all sorts of prime examples of how I am rapidly "syncing" up my personality with hers- and not in a good way.

She was the woman who would kick the drivers door in a cross walk on a car that cut through against the traffic light.  She was the 70 year old who would accelerate her Buick up a hill to cut off another driver driving trying to take her lane. Perhaps, most important of all, was her life long willingness to say pretty much what she wanted-when she wanted to say it. My Dad was decidedly more laid back.

I have accepted I resemble her and I have a real tendency to act like her.  My problem is in the series of "switches" I have had to gone through to accommodate myself.  As I made it through life, I could very much "bluff" my way through a macho existence and was left to my own "mouth."  Then of course as my "male privlidge" began to fade slowly as I grew older and then departed totally as I entered gender HRT transition- away it went. Not particularly a great time to showcase my sarcastic humor (?) on an unsuspecting public.

So I am stuck with all the genetic switches my Mom passed on and I can see them too in my 30 something daughter.  It's very ironic how much I am turning into my mother-more than she ever would want to know.

One thing is for sure-  She would not have hesitated to tell me her opinion on my transgender status and I wouldn't have hesitated to tell her I didn't care.

Boy Meets Trans Girl?

You bet ya and there is a film being released on the subject- and -are you sitting down-it stars a real live transgender woman actress. Michelle Hendley (left) is even a mid western girl and lives in  Columbia, Missouri.

Check out the movie's site here.

I watched one of the trailers and I ended up laughing and crying! For a trans person this looks to be the real deal!

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

To the best of my knowledge this is not a transgender woman wearing a quote I love!

In House Diversity?

Of interest Saturday night to me during the Leelah Alcorn vigil in Dayton, Ohio, was the "in house" diversity in attendance.  Fortunately, the great majority of the attendees were young TGLBQ women and men and the "T" was not silent.  Most certainly, the L's and G's of the group just maybe are coming to realize how much trouble the transgender community is in.  In fact, Kevin of the Dayton, Ohio area chapter of GLSEN and gay is one in the trenches helping local chapters in schools.

Others in attendance other than I mentioned, ran the gamut as I said.  Racquel and I sat next to a lesbian couple and behind us was a transgender woman old enough to make me look young!!!  Then, there were several transgender men in attendance including Draco and a couple trans men who I had only known on stage as drag kings.  Plus, even the largest predominately gay dance club was represented.

Finally, even a couple of transgender dinosaurs in the crowd were asked to speak. The idea was sound but it was the wrong place at the wrong time. Here's how it played out. One of the trans women got up and briefly told her story of getting "blown up and out" of her job years ago at an old Dayton job she had.  A worthwhile experience to be sure, but when she then went into a name dropping exercise of knowing the "Who's Who" of transgender culture such as Jennifer Boyle - I am fairly sure the younger part of the crowd was internally drawing a collective yawn. (I was) Then another "more mature" trans woman spoke and promptly mentioned to not forget how we transgender women and men discriminate against each other too. To be sure, true- but again not the right platform or soap box for her "airing of grievances." Moral to the story...do NOT let us talk to a mixed young crowd!!! ME included! (I wasn't asked and that is a GOOD thing!)

My personal fave of the evening was the little girl sitting on the floor below me. I was sitting at a front church pew at the end.  She was dressed head to toe in the pink and blue transgender color scheme. Seriously, I have no idea if she was trans at all but she was young enough to look like a kid at Christmas peering around the corner waiting for Santa! At the least, she learned tons and walked away as a diverse young ally!

Oh, by the way, I forgot to mention the four Dayton cop cars who were providing security- a very sobering thought. And the Dayton mayor spoke-nice!!!

Back to the "Lion's Den?"

The other day, Liz came up and we again went into "attack mode" working on the lengthy process to sell my house.  Later in the evening, we "celebrated" with a drink.  The problem is, in my smallish town, there are only two venues I feel right about supporting and they were closed.  Our option was driving twenty minutes one way to the venues I normally go to.

Finally, I thought "what the hell" and we went to the place where many years ago I had the cops called on me for using the women's rest room.  I just wanted to enjoy a couple "adult beverages" with Liz.  As luck would have it, the same bartender was working last night and we got to talk about "where I had been" In all fairness to her, she didn't call the cops back then.

Plus, since that time, I have gone through many MtF HRT physical transformations in the couple years since I have seen her. Also, even in the backward conservative town I am from, the populace is catching up to what a transgender person is.

So, in and out we went and in some small way, I slayed another one of my smaller dragons.  Will we go back?  Only as a last chance.

Fix Society

My new "bumper sticker"!

It's August Again!

WAY back in the day when I happened along the rare picture of a female impersonator, by the name of Kim August. Of course I was entranced by the idea that any guy could look this good as a woman.  Well, she did and began working as a gender impersonator at age 15 from Flint, Michigan. She sang in her own voice which in it's self separated her from just being a drag queen.