Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

Too Much Style for One Gender

A "Cyrsti's Condo" Pick-Pic!

"Your Type" Can NOT Come IN

Perhaps you have heard of Helen Boyd.  Her books, including My Husband Betty would be one of my choices to give to a spouse when you are coming out for the first time as a cross dresser or transgender woman.

Her blog is called En Gender and a recent post called UnValentine caught my eye.  Evidently she wrote it when her and her partner were not welcomed in a "woman's only" space.  Here's an excerpt:

Why should someone’s transition negate the partner’s identity as a lesbian? The whole idea that they wouldn't “look like” a lesbian couple is infuriating – the same argument was made against butch/femme couples back in the day. 

 Here’s the thing: as a community, could we maybe start to acknowledge that people transition, and that they have histories, and identities, and life experiences, all of which may not tidily map onto our models of “straight” and “gay”? Can we allow trans couples to decide how to negotiate their own identities as individuals and couples instead of everyone else telling us where we belong? Can a trans guy honor his own past and his relationship’s past without other trans men telling him he’s sold out his gender and trans people everywhere? 

Are lesbians really not used to guys transitioning yet? A little compassion would be awesome from groups who are now and who have been, historically, excluded discreetly and explicitly, kindly and hatefully. Trans partners are often a wrench in the homo/hetero works, but sometimes we get eaten by the gears. 

Well said! For more, go here.

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day

Our featured "Cover Girl" is transgender model Naam

Cyrsti's Condo Sunday Edition

Page one.- "Book em Danno"  a quote from Hawaii Five-O- fame, gets us started this Sunday Morning. I was using the quote to get us to the Facebook announcement this week they were going to open up their gender options....really open them up to approx 50 different gender categories. I met the news with enthusiasm, other's not so much, which is understandable.  One of my lesbian friends was simply surprised with the number of categories and I told her, someone at Facebook probably thought if they (FB), opened the door to a couple different gender categories, they better do it for all they could think of.

Another opinion comes from Condo visitor Alexis Michelle:

Last night I listened to a show that was talking about not only this but the entire gender identity issue. The question came up as to exactly why Facebook did this now. I guess the host is one who questions "why" many things happen. So does Facebook have an ulterior motive for this move? Is this an attempt to begin putting people into pigeon slots for some future purpose, be it good or not? I don't know myself, but I'm going to leave my gender as female regardless of this. Heck, I don't even know what some of those terms truly mean. But even with the ones I am familiar with, I'd have to choose between more than one. Too many options in my humble opinion...........

Thanks Alexis Michelle and I'm sure you are right, somewhere, sometime, someone may use the information and send it off to "Big Brother" for less than good reasons.  However, I think any kind of census count of the TGLB community may be good for at least we "T"'s.  If you remember, not long ago some "official" count listed transgender women and transgender men as nearly as rare as a Republican voting for same sex marriage. So as I said, if Facebook comes up with a surprising number of trans users who change their gender listings (Like you Michelle, I used the female option previously too.)- a light bulb may go on and Big Brother may realize we are a force to be reckoned with.

Who knows?

Page 2.- We took a break, a potty break in a safe place and sent along a link which lists places where transgender women or men and cross dressers can "pee in peace".  I went on the site called Refuge Restrooms and added a few of my own.  All too often these days I believe I'm beginning to see restroom "privilege" as yet another "hierarchy" hammer being used in our community.  I'm better than you because I'm "accomplished" enough to use the women's room without incident and you are not. Obviously we don't need another hammer being used and a site such as Refuge, helps negate it.

Page 3.- Media "splashes" last week turned into tidal waves for the transgender community when icons such as Laverne Cox, Carmen Carrera, and Janet Mock jumped into the pool with very public interviews. All three put the spotlight on our lives and tried to take it away from our genitalia.  All of them pushed ahead with a unified, much needed public statement which has yet to work for me but might sooner more than later. I still encounter the occasional "civilian" on line or even in public, who just has to know what is or isn't, between my legs.  Again, I was bemoaning the fact I was being "sexualized" vs "genderized" by these people with my lesbian friend I mentioned above....she said relax they are just curious about you (me).  Easy for her to say because years ago she asked me the same question and certainly genetic women are the most curious group in the human race!

Page 4.- Fact or Freak?  Sure looks to me like Bruce Jenner just might have been dabbling in a little HRT which certainly doesn't make him a freak but the way he is handling it does.



Back Page.- Well, I hope those of you still getting pummeled by terrible weather on the East Coast of the United States are getting back to normal and a big WOW to Micheal Sam  a NFL draft prospect who came out as gay before the draft!

Hope you all have a good week and as always, it's all of you who make the Cyrsti's Condo what it is today!

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

The Ego of Transition

I don't pretend to play or think in the arena of transgender icon's such as Janet Mock who recently released a new book called Redefining Realness.  Of course, her recent interview with Piers Morgan stirred up controversy as did Katie Couric with Laverne Cox and Carmen Carerra.  Both Morgan and Couric to a degree wanted to focus on the mechanics of transition rather than the person involved.

My question is, isn't that a huge reason we can't get along well in our own community? How many times have you seen me use the term Trans Nazi to describe someone who feels they should move to the head of the line just because of money expended and pain suffered? I know for sure, there have been cross dressers who have felt I would be the same way, simply because I live a feminine life; and let's not forget the usual genitalia questions I always get.  So, I guess I'm in the same boat and did all the uproar help me?

That's the world today, right?  What's in it for me?  Don't get me wrong. I get sick and tired of being asked about what is between my legs, I can only imagine what it would be like for Carmen, Janet or Laverne. I do find it positive they all pushed back.

I'm not naive enough to think the world will get to a point where we can be defined as women and not transgender women anytime soon.  We still have too much ground to cover and in my case, I will never be able to take the "trans" off my identity. Sixty plus years of male dominated living is simply too much to overtake.  Then again who cares?  Sure, there will always be the haters.  The Rad Femme Lesbians or Trans Nazi's probably won't go away in my lifetime. Then again, do I care?  Not so much. I'm selfish. I just want to navigate the world as closely to a woman as I can. It is quite the liberating experience for me and I will fight like hell to keep it.

Yes, on occasion all the transgender icon's do help me.  In fact more of the world is now educated to the fact there are more of me than they thought and I'm very real.  In the end, we are just trying to live our lives the best we know and along the way, we are all similar to Janet Mock.

We are simply redefining what realness is to us.

Enough is Enough-or Is It?

I really liked the fact Facebook opened up it's gender options so I could identify as a transgender woman....but....when they opened it up, they weren't playing!

Check this list:


Agender Androgyne Androgynous Bigender Cis Cisgender Cis Female Cis Male Cis Man Cis Woman Cisgender Female Cisgender Male Cisgender Man Cisgender Woman Female to Male FTM Gender Fluid Gender Nonconforming Gender Questioning Gender Variant Genderqueer Intersex Male to Female MTF Neither Neutrois Non-binary Other Pangender Trans Trans* Trans Female Trans* Female Trans Male Trans* Male Trans Man Trans* Man Trans Person Trans* Person Trans Woman Trans* Woman Transfeminine Transgender Transgender Female Transgender Male Transgender Man Transgender Person Transgender Woman Transmasculine Transsexual Transsexual Female Transsexual Male Transsexual Man Transsexual Person Transsexual Woman Two-Spirit

Wow!

We've come along way baby! I can remember when transgender wasn't even a recognized word!

They Said What???

By now you all have noticed how I love to speculate on what womanless pageant participants are really thinking here in Cyrsti's Condo.

Here are a couple more:


Oh Oh! I came out of this looking a little too good.  DON"T SMILE and act lack you enjoy this!!!!









and:

So what if I got him to shave his legs, those heels will have to get to him sooner or later.  Hmmmn, wait a minute, he is a little too comfortable. Has he done this drag stuff before? Dammit! I'm doomed! Look at him! First I have to compete with my girlfriends, now him?