The Russians Are Coming!

This is part two of my last post.
On the same day I had the "connection" with the gay guy in guy drag, this happened to me at night.
I headed to my current "fave" spot. Very early into the evening,  one of the "other" sorority girls had enough "liquid" courage to sit down next to me and ask the magic question...what is your story?
I have seen her many times but never understood how close she was to the "ruling Alpha Females" in the pub...including the one who got me banned from the women's room
My immediate answer was "you ask me questions" what do you want to know?
As she fooled with my hair and dabbed at my eye makeup, the only real question again was the use of the restroom.
It turns out (according to her) some of the *sorority sisters have a problem with my restroom choice when they get a little intoxicated. I didn't mention the woman is Russian and consumed two shots of liquor and a beer in the short time she talked to me! In her thick Russian accent she said she didn't care but some of the others were not so liberal and were very narrow minded Ohio girls. (I need to throw Oklahoma under the bus here, because I know at least one is from there).
I kept trying to impress upon her how happy I was she took the time to talk to me and attempted to get to know me.  I had hoped to do that with the rest of the sisters.
Several very important things could come of this. First and foremost maybe I made another friend in the group. IF she remembers any of the conversation. Some night I want to gather my courage and sit down with the group and have a chat.
My fear is the rest room discrimination card is still very much in play here. If I never had to use it that would be fine but that is not possible.
I considered not going back for awhile. Then again, why should I penalize myself for a couple others feelings and I am sooo tired of running. I like the place!
I know I'm a curiosity but I don't want to be a distraction and definitely don't want to be a problem! 
Maybe nothing will happen and hopefully I will find the courage to chat with the sorority,
Time will tell and it is moving at "warp" speed!

*The group has nothing to do with a real sorority.  I use the term to describe the female gender as a whole and their reaction to a transgender woman. In this case a group of 4 to 5 regular single females in the pub who hand out together.

Gay/Transdar?

Recently I have found myself in social situations with a couple of gay men. It all happened at work or at a store while I was in guy drag.
This is all so interesting because I have never had a total sexual experience with a guy...ever.  To my knowledge, I have never been remotely "socialized" by a gay man. What I mean is any more interaction than normal pleasantries. Somehow this is more.
Why? I can only guess my recent dealings with men has opened me up on a different level that gay guys pick up on. Somehow the one yesterday did.
I would have never have  predicted my life may go this direction.  Three years ago (as I have mentioned many times) I considered myself at the least...a transgendered lesbian.
Today (if you are into labels) I consider myself a very curious transgendered girl. 
The whole feeling is one of liberation at the least and freedom at the best!
My next post will delve farther into all of this and why I can't be making any of this up!

Transgendered Actresses Playing Trangendered Roles!

The "New York Times" recently featured several transgendered actresses in an article called "When They Play Women, It's Not Just An Act." Pictured above is Harmony Santana who stars in “Gun Hill Road”

One of the other featured actresses is "Laverne Cox" pictured above who has being living as a female since the late 90's and was a star on VH1's reality show , “Transform Me.”

Now What Part 28!

Again, I was going out for a quick evening...
Big, long and hot days coming up
No such luck. First there was "Orlando". I persuaded  him I was texting my mean big boyfriend and he was on his way.
Next was the girl who wanted to dance with me...in a sports bar.
Finally, in my own hometown. I figured I would encounter the usual BS encounters.
Not tonite! I was there for around ten minutes or so. Two guys walked up and the one asked if the seat next to me was open.
I said "sure" and the older man sat down next to me and proceeded to not leave me alone, He was cool and we shared many experiences.
Eye to eye we talked and he said or indicated not a word about me being trans.
The frustrating part is  I don't know why  I went through an entire evening being female accepted.
Looks? Maybe?
Confidence, probably. Definitely the evening will be revisited!

Enjoy!

ARIANDA SODI from Chile.  No hormones or surgery. Then again Barry Bonds never took steroids!

Awkward Moment

I have been doing quite a bit of work around the house this week and have had to spent too much extra time in male drag.
As a favor, I dropped off a grille to a friend who owns a small tavern for his annual fish fry.
Of course I had to enjoy a quick one before taking off.
In walks a guy who has seen the real me. I've often wondered if he knew and always assumed he did. (The real me has never been in the tavern)
He didn't stay long but I did have a chance to buy him a beer. He always buys me one in male drag and even one night as my real self.
It's interesting in that I've never really seen him with a girl and he touched my shoulder on the way by.
The awkward moment came when he tried to leave and was going to hug me. I thought a handshake was better.
I'm guessing I'm already out to him!

Bringing Back The Hit's

Life has been so hectic this week that I haven't had much time to play or even write about it. I have however, manged to meet some new and interesting people from both genders. Several of which don't totally understand who I really am.

Taking all of that into consideration and with everything in my life zooming along at warp speed, this post seemed to be appropriate.

"Trans" Got Your Tongue?

Suddenly you find yourself beside or very close to a transgender person. Now what?

You want to say something but don't know where to start
The dynamics of starting a conversation are very complex! You've already figured we are not contagious or harmful. The hard part is over.
Three things could be in your mind. Number one, you are just curious. Why does a person want to change a perfectly good gender?
Number two, you want to expand your experiences. You want to add a transgender conversation into your life experiences. Unfortunately, this usually includes the process of telling all your friends! Hey! Guess what I did?
Number three, you assume the trans person is lonely. You are just being nice!
All three of these reasons are absolutely rational reasons! Curiosity is fine. Just try to be careful with really crazy questions. I do understand though you have no idea what a crazy question is. I'm patient!
Expanding your experiences is fine. Just don't make us the spectacle to do it. Don't be the first of your whole group to have enough courage to speak then go back and have the others "slink" up or worse yet "snicker" at us from across the room.
The assumption we are lonely is as false as the assumption we are all promiscuous. On the other hand a light conversation is usually always welcome.
My assumption is you are a genetic female if you are interacting with me at all. Men just have too many gender bridges to cross to approach us. If they do, the worst are the guys who want to call you "man" or "dude" and want to give you the knuckle buster male power handshake. Rare is the man who is secure enough in himself to converse with us. I'm really insecure with guys. First i have to find out if they know I'm trans and then try to figure out where they are going! I'm not one of the Trans Girl "male bashers" you hear so much about. It's just reality.
I can't speak for the rest of the transgender female community but I welcome approaches on several different levels.
I have no problem on explaining to you what I am. If I have the courage to express my true self and you have the courage to ask me... I will do my best to educate you.
I love to talk fashion with you and even guys and sports too! On the other hand if we appear to be unfriendly it is just that we are really shy and we have to wait for you to make the first move!
The approaches I hate are the "carnival" views and the "guy" bashing. Sure, I'm very different in many eyes but have some respect. I'm sure there are some skeletons dancing around in your closet. The difference is that this isn't my closet. It's my life.
As far you insecure guys go , please don't take it out on me. I know you have that pretty dress hidden at home. Hope it fits!

Want's Versus Need's

We haven't really covered much of the Transsexual vs Transgender discussion.
I am very sure I don't fall into the transsexual category for one major reason. I want to live as a girl. I don't have to.
Nothing told me when I was seven that I was a girl. Something did tell me at 10 I was very different. Life went on and signposts slowly were pointing me towards my female side.
Comments such as "you look better as a girl"  made me want more.  The trial and error learning process of living female in the public's eye left me wanting still more.
So what came first. The want or the need?
I can tell you the want has allowed me to feel deeply satisfied in the female role.  Do I need to?  I'm sure if you took the opportunity to live female away tomorrow; I'm certain I would need to.
Does it matter? No, not really in the scope of life. I do wonder sometimes how the transsexual tag fits me.
Then again, I'm probably the only one. My circle of friends don't seem to care.
So if no one cares... just forget I brought this up! lol

Catching Up

Hi friends, just wanted to catch up on the week.  The weather is been very hot and humid in my part of the world.
So bad as a matter of fact that some of my faves closed early last night from lack of business.
The challenge of course is to be able to dress for the heat and not melt.
I'm not exactly sure, but this summer I seem to melt less and my makeup stays put. I have finally found a foundation I use which covers well with less.
The fun part of the summer is I have been able to put together several new outfits. Always a major problem.
I believe I have told you I can not shave my arms so covering them is a problem. The solution has been several several very light weight tops that I wear over bras and halter tops or even nothing at all. I have been able to finally highlight a woman's best fashion accessory in the summer...skin.
Flip flops, bare legs and a short flared skirt are fun to wear and help to cool a warm evening. My diet has served me well in that I can open my top to the air with a flat tummy.
I don't tan well and the thought of tanning beds sends me into shock so  I use a "skin glow" product which is a lotion that softens and gives the skin a warm glow.
So the hottest week of the year around here has been quite the learning experience!
Will I miss it when it goes? No! Will I remember the fun? Yes!