Cyrsti's Condo "Fashion Statement"

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Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

“One is not born a woman, one becomes one.” Simone de Beauvoir 

Cyrsti's Condo "Cover Girl" of the Day!

Our feature cover today is the Turkish mtf transgender beauty Yakici Guzel!

Female Impersonators Versus Drag Queens

Some time ago here in Cyrsti's Condo featuring Baby Martell and Thomas Brayden commented:

For women it is often acknowledged in past times to allow them to would like to undercover dress them selves as the member of the other sexual regarding work in addition to career factors particularly for men took over career where they can pass in addition to are men. For the other area in the gold coin males have worked in female impersonator orientated occupations obtaining crossdessed since ladies.

Our vintage impersonator to the left is actually Lee Shaw.

Thanks to Thomas for the comment which may indeed be a "Google translation."

I "think" what the translation was trying to come up with was, in the past women would disguise themselves to work successfully as men.  Men on the other hand who could pass as beautiful  women could find work to as female impersonators. 

The reason I say that is a translation, a long time ago I chatted a couple times with a transgender woman in France.  Being the "tricky" person I am, I tried to use the translating tool on my end.  She politely told me me DON'T! It was coming out on her end as really screwy. 

Which brings me to the point I made in our Sunday edition, I don't think of -or mention the tons of readers we have from around the world.  I am old school and just humbled by the process!  Thanks to all of you!

Plus, any sort of translation takes me back to my Army days when I lived in Thailand and Germany for an extended time- I never did pick up any feel for the languages.  Some would argue I still struggle with English!

So again, thanks to Thomas for giving it a go...as Paula would say!

Finally, feel free to comment in your native language and there is a good chance I can get it translated on my end - if you tell me where it is coming from.  A year or so ago I was even able to come up with a translation from a Maylasian  person in Kuala Lumpor.

Sometimes it is a small world after all!

Checking Those Fluid Levels!

I guess the last couple of posts here in Cyrsti's Condo may make the point more effectively than the one I'm going to discuss.  The "Madam LaNoe!" and star gazing posts were essentially genderless.  I wondered aloud with Liz what the average peep who stumbled across this blog the last couple days would wonder why the transgender tag is on it at all.

Maybe Pat answered part of it when she commented : While I have been following your blog it is clear that you are going through a multi year transition. I assume that at some point you will reach a point where you are comfortable knowing that you have always been a blend of male and female but that your components have been reprocessed and have reached a new equilibrium.
Many others are on the journey

Pat didn't use the term "gender fluid", but on occasion I have considered the term as an interchangeable one for me and one which causes more than a couple of my "critics" to go "bonkers."  I understand why for the most part.  They are the "black and white" thinkers who have very little respect for a life out of the male/female binary- no matter how they identify. So would the "strict gender constructionists" be more comfortable with Cyrsti's "Gender Fluid" Condo?  I'm thinking not.

Regardless of all my babbling,  Pat's right, I am reaching a point of equilibrium and it's mainly because of the friends who refused NOT to accept me for anything other than the person I was. THEY brought me full scale out of the closet.

I will argue the equilibrium began when I began to accept my life as a man, even though I desperately didn't want to be there.  Of course some would argue, I wasn't desperate enough or I wouldn't have stayed there and those people are right too.  But, time, circumstances and lives change in a blink and  we all have reasons of why we are here  Plus, when you are almost 65, you have a freight train full of baggage to sort through to even try to understand why.

These days, it's not really a question anymore of checking my gender levels.  I'm at rest finally about who I am and when you think about it, gender is merely how society sees you. If I spend a day in drag as a guy now, at the least I'm a rather androgynous one doing things like mowing the grass.  Somehow, I don't think it would be appropriate to wear a skirt, heels and full makeup to mow.So I get a man to do it and that just happens to still be me. To put the whole idea in perspective, I have exactly two pairs of men's jeans left,one set of casual men's clothes and my old Army uniform and a bunch of unisex t-shirts.

Transgender, gender fluid, glorified cross dresser or whatever label anyone wants to slap on me, there is only one that really matters- survivor.

Cyrsti's Condo "Star Gazing"

Well kids, the stars have provided all of us Libra's with another wild look at the week!!!

(September 23-October 22): Living like you’re some sort of cult legend has been done and now it’s time to give up the vintage thinking for a more updated and wild approach to tackling the possibilities presented to you. You lack no shortage of optimism for others, so be open to giving it to yourself, because if you can sell it, anything can happen.

Best Lay Day: Tuesday, August 19

Really? Does that mean I will have to stop my cult legend lifestyle?  Just between you and me and the star gazers, if I was able to live 19% of the lifestyle some think I live-I would be happy!

Our "guest" spotlighted scope this week goes to the Sagittarius folks who seem rather conflicted between their "Butch and Bitch" sides:

(November 22-December 21): This week will be full of inner conflict, as your bitch and butch sides will rage hard and make you scramble at the thought of competition and claiming your turf. There is no defeating you now, but there is a way of outsmarting you, so don’t let your pride lead you to your next victory. Humbling yourself to the details will be what gives you the leg up on everyone.

There you go kids, if we missed your sign, don't despair and head to theFrisky for yours!

"Madam 'LaNoe!' Beckons!

If my old addled noggin has served me correct, in the past here in Cyrsti's Condo, I mentioned the possibility of putting together a persona called Madam LaNoe!" My initial idea (which got better and better as I had more and more adult beverages)  was, the "Madam" would be an "intermission" performer at drag shows.

She would be a harmless blend of Johnny Carson's "Carnac" (picture provided) - with a pinch of voodoo tossed in along with fortune telling and snake oil sales. Ironically, in another life I did a take off on Carnac at a couple functions-complete with hat.

Don't panic, my "card reading" would be from a regular deck of cards and my "voodoo" doll would be a stuffed bunny rabbit in a basket.

So, my partner Liz is a great seamstress and knows her way around a little make up and is creative as hell to boot.

So two nights ago, she is up at five in the morning tracing ideas for "The Madam"  She wants to "roll her out" at the big "Highball" Halloween party in Columbus, Ohio this year. AND! She won't let me see any of her ideas and get this:  She simply said "I will blow you like you have never been blown before!"  Well, even I had no comeback for that!

I do know this, the image on the right is similar to the makeup she wants to do on me and I have this giant black drag wig.  Past that, all I know is, "The Madam" will have long flowing skirts and old combat boots and possibly will be outfitted with her own "business cards."

The only thing I can tell you is, Halloween is looking a whole lot more interesting this year!!!!

It's a Brave New World

As comments with me sometimes do, on occasion they "gang up on me."

Last week the process happened last week with Liz (my partner) and Missy ( deceased wife's sister.)  Liz was sort of expected but I was blind sighted by Missy's.

First of all she is very toasted from years of substance abuse (she is approx 55.)  We were talking the other day since I was given the job of "life coach" with her from Momma Karma and she came up with this question: "How did I function (seemingly) as well as I did with all the 'wanting to be a girl' stuff swirling in my head."  When she comes up with a classic question which is relevant to me and my transgender transition-I'm stunned.  This was one of those questions.

My answer was one we have chatted about here in Cyrsti's Condo, what would have any of us have done if we would have had the freedom to fully explore our gender dysphoria before we went on to have wife's, kids and the rest.  I think I did well enough but I told her (as well as anyone who will listen) I would not wish the ripping and tearing of my heart and soul on my worst enemy.  I have no idea of course what I could have been able to achieve and  in reality now, none of it matters.

Very simply now though, my advice to anyone with gender dysphoria is to explore it as young as you can.  There is only one certainty, it is not going away.

Then there was Liz.  She commented the other night how amazed she was of how "sensitive" I was to the world around me.  I just don't think she understands (I have told her) how much she matters in the process. Her support, along with a couple others, has allowed me to see the world as I always should have.  I have always enjoyed my share of different art forms, music and nature.  Along the way, I was curious about and studied (lightly) many different religions.  These days I have been freed of the gender constraints of my past. In fact my transgender status frees me of both the binary genders...but...

In the true essence of the giving, loving and understanding genetic woman we all aspire to, Karma has blessed me with three of them.  Ironically, they don't have much of a grasp of what they have done and I haven't been able to get my point across yet-except they feel the changes in me.

What path would I have taken if I had an open door?  Big question! We will try to bring out our Cyrsti's Condo "cyrstal ball"  in a future post!

Is It A "Man's World?"

Unfortunately, as you may have read here in Cyrsti's Condo, I witnessed a drunk neighbor man push and then hit in the face his girlfriend across the street from me.  Yes I did call the cops but wasn't the first and I did volunteer if they needed a witness. (they didn't)

Billie took the time to comment. From Billie :  I'm also infuriated by his striking a woman, but this is so true! It IS obviously a man's world after all and we "girls" are just a small part in it! Such is the life we lead!

While I agree with Bobbie, in these new lives we are leading as transgender women, the shift of "power" is one of the biggest gender transitions. Similar to so much of the lifestyle of women versus men, the concept of power to women is so much more complex to navigate and adjust to.  Due to physical limitations alone, women have to fight more mental battles than men. So in a one on one physical fight, for the most part it is a man's world.  In my many years of gender disagreements, I had to learn the hard way, since I couldn't hit a woman, I had to learn to get in her head and fight the way she did with me. To use an old quote, some of my "tiff's" were won, some were lost and most were rained out.

I also was raised in a post WWII family of strong macho men who did a outstanding job of being over achieving providers but it was an equally strong family of women who ran the show.  So as boys growing up we always knew we were inheriting the image of running the show. (wink-wink)

Then came the feminism movement in the 1960's and the sexual revolution and all of the sudden, the traditional strongholds of "male power" began to erode.  Slowly but surely, the process continues today and naturally many men are insecure.  Unfortunately, insecurity is a precursor to violence in a man.  


Over the past several years of living and trying to understand the dynamics of the mtf transition "thang", on occasion I have been dazzled on how much each gender doesn't understand about the other.  An example is the "men don't listen" idea.  After I went to the gender speech class at the Trans Ohio Symposium last May, the idea of men not listening may be a by product of how women speak and the words they use.


Finally Billie, I saw a comment today on a singles dating show (Bravo TV) from a woman saying they ought to do a study on the "pussification" of men.  The show I think went on to prove how that was true with one guy who essentially was afraid to even kiss his date for fear of a pending relationship.  So on that show, except for the token gay guys, it was a woman's world. The images of men being males and sex objects is as real as the past females were the sex objects.

For what it's worth,  I think younger guys today do have a more diverse world to adjust to.  All of the sudden, many of them do more than play golf and bring home a pay check.  They help raise the kids and so much more.  In my neck of the woods it's the males who can't understand the present and future of what it means to be a man are the drunk, stoned or stupid ones who use violence on women.