I read this morning JoAnn Roberts passed away.
Briefly JoAnn and her TG Forum site was one of the first informational places I discovered when I got hooked up to the internet. She identified as a cross dresser and provided a path for closeted CD's like me to see and understand I should not be ashamed for who I was.
To this day her Forum has been one of the very few cross dresser sites to withstand the advance of time.
She will be missed!
Monday, June 10, 2013
Sunday, June 9, 2013
Cross Dressing "Goals"
As you have probably figured out, I follow many different sources making an attempt at bringing an interesting Cyrsti's Condo blog to you.
One person in particular I have followed off and on for years has been posting videos recently of her "out and about" public adventures. She is a very attractive girl and caught my curiosity when she started to change her identification markers from simply "MtF" to cross dresser to a mixture of both.
After her latest video, a "viewer" asked a question I see frequently aimed at attractive cross dressers. How she can appear so "accomplished" and then go back to "his" regular life.
Good question and a good answer too!
One theory at why a cross dresser may have an easier time adjusting back to his everyday male life is his "hobby" is just that. He just happens to be very good at it. The process is similar to a drag queen's transformation into incredible looking women. Most do not want to be female at all.
Another theory comes from an engineering friend who believes an attractive cross dresser is the ultimate male ego trip. Working on, designing and assembling your own female doll- who happens to be you. He thinks an inordinate amount of CD's are engineers.
Enough of all of that, here was her answer:
(Paraphrasing) , she said "I accomplished the goal of spending the weekend presenting as a woman- Shopping, entertainment and all. I don't know what I will do next."
I understand and could have written that very phrase about my life as a cross dresser. As I went to this mall, or store or restaurant with success of sorts- I would literally drive around looking for new places to try out as a girl. I had my goals.
The difference was for me, slowly but surely it dawned on me what I would do next. I wanted to live a feminine existence. It all felt so totally right. It was so clear even I could figure it out. Looks though had very little to do with my decision. A feminine appearance just was one tool of getting to where I wanted to be.
The central point many miss in our culture is giving too much credence to looks. Let's assume the person who asked the question looked wonderful in drag and decided to do it day after day. Rest assured the "novelty" of appearing as an attractive woman would wear off quickly. Any sort of looks (one way or another) fade quickly when you attempt to truly jump the gender fence. Yet another of my Socialization over Visualization lectures.
ZZZZZ.
One person in particular I have followed off and on for years has been posting videos recently of her "out and about" public adventures. She is a very attractive girl and caught my curiosity when she started to change her identification markers from simply "MtF" to cross dresser to a mixture of both.
After her latest video, a "viewer" asked a question I see frequently aimed at attractive cross dressers. How she can appear so "accomplished" and then go back to "his" regular life.
Good question and a good answer too!
One theory at why a cross dresser may have an easier time adjusting back to his everyday male life is his "hobby" is just that. He just happens to be very good at it. The process is similar to a drag queen's transformation into incredible looking women. Most do not want to be female at all.
Another theory comes from an engineering friend who believes an attractive cross dresser is the ultimate male ego trip. Working on, designing and assembling your own female doll- who happens to be you. He thinks an inordinate amount of CD's are engineers.
Enough of all of that, here was her answer:
(Paraphrasing) , she said "I accomplished the goal of spending the weekend presenting as a woman- Shopping, entertainment and all. I don't know what I will do next."
I understand and could have written that very phrase about my life as a cross dresser. As I went to this mall, or store or restaurant with success of sorts- I would literally drive around looking for new places to try out as a girl. I had my goals.
The difference was for me, slowly but surely it dawned on me what I would do next. I wanted to live a feminine existence. It all felt so totally right. It was so clear even I could figure it out. Looks though had very little to do with my decision. A feminine appearance just was one tool of getting to where I wanted to be.
The central point many miss in our culture is giving too much credence to looks. Let's assume the person who asked the question looked wonderful in drag and decided to do it day after day. Rest assured the "novelty" of appearing as an attractive woman would wear off quickly. Any sort of looks (one way or another) fade quickly when you attempt to truly jump the gender fence. Yet another of my Socialization over Visualization lectures.
ZZZZZ.
Lost in the Ozone
Recently I tried to post an Asian cross dressing video to the Crysti's Condo big screen. Due to some sort of techno ineptitude on my part, the video just disappeared - Poof! I could find no record of it ever existing.
One of my faithful readers, Alice actually saw the intro I wrote but no video.I was relieved and figured at least I wasn't making the whole thing up in the deep dark recesses of my noggin.
At that point, I sat out to locate the video on YouTube. Easier said than done. I think there are more videos dealing with Asian cross dressing and transgender subjects on YouTube than China has people!
If nothing else Alice, I am persistent. Let's try it again!
One of my faithful readers, Alice actually saw the intro I wrote but no video.I was relieved and figured at least I wasn't making the whole thing up in the deep dark recesses of my noggin.
At that point, I sat out to locate the video on YouTube. Easier said than done. I think there are more videos dealing with Asian cross dressing and transgender subjects on YouTube than China has people!
If nothing else Alice, I am persistent. Let's try it again!
Fashion Stages
Along the way perhaps you have heard of the term cross dresser puberty. Loosely translated the term can be applied to a crosser dresser or transgender woman of any age. The stereotypical example is the overweight guy at the mall teetering along in a micro mini skirt and heels typically worn by a teen aged girl.
I too tried to dress that way into my mid 30's until I grew out of my adolescance the way most do- with tons of pain and suffering! Much of my problem stemmed from comments on my "fabulous legs". Nice of course but as I looked around, lots of men have good feminine looking legs- cross dressed or not. My problem was and is-what are my two legs attached to?
I could write tons of words on the topic but where I was heading is- what is the next step we should take our fashion to?
I found a rather short and to the point look which came from Katie Couric and fashion expert Gretta Monahan:
"Dressing your age can be an ambiguous road to travel, as there is a fine line between a fashion choice that makes you look younger and clothes that are simply too young for you.
Fashion expert Gretta Monahan gave us tips for women to look and feel their best at any age. She encourages women to avoid giving a message of insecurity with their style choices –they should be comfortable with their age and stage in life. A woman in her 20s is going through what Monahan calls her "first impression period," so it is important to give the right impression and not "get trapped by the trends." Invest in one great trend piece -- a classic jacket or handbag -- and build a wardrobe that can be mixed and matched. Mixing your work and weekend wear is a must for a woman on the go in her 20s. And Monahan encourages women in their 20s to embrace their youth and have fun with their wardrobe.
The 30s are a time for a woman to make a sophisticated shift in her image. To do this, Monahan recommends having fun with necklines, whether it's a deep V-neck, a one-shouldered top or a strapless dress. As leather is timelessness yet trendy, Monahan says it's important to have a go-to statement leather piece such as a belt, cuff or cropped jacket. This is a time when women should avoid playing it safe.
When a woman enters her 40s, she should look for energizing colors and prints in figure- flattering shapes. Avoiding baggy and ill fitting clothes is essential, and women in their 40s should not be afraid to raise their hemline a little
As women enter their 50s, they should add versatile wrap dresses to their closet and keep their eye out for flattering three-quarter sleeved tops. Monahan recommends that as women age, they should tone down their makeup but add youthful touches to their hairstyle – such as highlights or bangs. This is the age to invest in a quality support bra and a well-fitted pair of jeans, avoiding "mom" jeans that tend to ride too high and have a tapered leg. Monahan’s overall tip for women and their fashion choices is to avoid being matchy-matchy – never match your handbag to your shoes or overcoordinate your accessories. This will age you no matter what stage of your life you are in As Monahan says, fashion is about presenting your best self and being comfortable with the woman you are – so have fun."
For more go here.
I too tried to dress that way into my mid 30's until I grew out of my adolescance the way most do- with tons of pain and suffering! Much of my problem stemmed from comments on my "fabulous legs". Nice of course but as I looked around, lots of men have good feminine looking legs- cross dressed or not. My problem was and is-what are my two legs attached to?
I could write tons of words on the topic but where I was heading is- what is the next step we should take our fashion to?
I found a rather short and to the point look which came from Katie Couric and fashion expert Gretta Monahan:
"Dressing your age can be an ambiguous road to travel, as there is a fine line between a fashion choice that makes you look younger and clothes that are simply too young for you.
Fashion expert Gretta Monahan gave us tips for women to look and feel their best at any age. She encourages women to avoid giving a message of insecurity with their style choices –they should be comfortable with their age and stage in life. A woman in her 20s is going through what Monahan calls her "first impression period," so it is important to give the right impression and not "get trapped by the trends." Invest in one great trend piece -- a classic jacket or handbag -- and build a wardrobe that can be mixed and matched. Mixing your work and weekend wear is a must for a woman on the go in her 20s. And Monahan encourages women in their 20s to embrace their youth and have fun with their wardrobe.
The 30s are a time for a woman to make a sophisticated shift in her image. To do this, Monahan recommends having fun with necklines, whether it's a deep V-neck, a one-shouldered top or a strapless dress. As leather is timelessness yet trendy, Monahan says it's important to have a go-to statement leather piece such as a belt, cuff or cropped jacket. This is a time when women should avoid playing it safe.
When a woman enters her 40s, she should look for energizing colors and prints in figure- flattering shapes. Avoiding baggy and ill fitting clothes is essential, and women in their 40s should not be afraid to raise their hemline a little
As women enter their 50s, they should add versatile wrap dresses to their closet and keep their eye out for flattering three-quarter sleeved tops. Monahan recommends that as women age, they should tone down their makeup but add youthful touches to their hairstyle – such as highlights or bangs. This is the age to invest in a quality support bra and a well-fitted pair of jeans, avoiding "mom" jeans that tend to ride too high and have a tapered leg. Monahan’s overall tip for women and their fashion choices is to avoid being matchy-matchy – never match your handbag to your shoes or overcoordinate your accessories. This will age you no matter what stage of your life you are in As Monahan says, fashion is about presenting your best self and being comfortable with the woman you are – so have fun."
For more go here.
The Little Black Dress and the Trans Woman
Well girlfriends, there is damn " little" about any part of my body but that doesn't stop me from coveting my own "dee-licious" fun version of a "little black dress" Speaking of fun-check Sherry's version on the Cyrsti's Condo big screen:
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Before and After HRT
Every once in a while here in Cyrsti's Condo I like to slide in a very good "before" and an even better HRT "after:
The Boy who Would be Queen?
Way back in "not so jolly" old England it seems there is a bit of an idea being discussed again over tea (or Ale) across the pond. Was the "Virgin Queen- Elizabeth I" in reality a cross dressing male? Nothing really new about this idea. Such "unknowns" as Bram Stoker of Dracula fame included the theory in his book "Impostors". Now there is a push to solve the mystery once and for all by opening the Queen's tomb and rooting around for DNA. Here's this story from The GuardianOnline" :
"The bones of Elizabeth I, Good Queen Bess, lie mingled with those of her sister, Bloody Mary, in a single tomb at Westminster Abbey. But are they really royal remains — or evidence of the greatest conspiracy in English history? If that is not the skeleton of Elizabeth Tudor, the past four centuries of British history have been founded on a lie. And according to a controversial new book, the lie began on an autumn morning 470 years ago, when panic swept through a little group of courtiers in a manor house in the Cotswold village of Bisley in Gloucestershire."
To cut to the chase, The not so warm and fuzzy Henry VIII was coming to visit his daughter Elizabeth- who in fact was dead. The problem was her governess and guardian would most certainly face the King's wrath for "letting" his heir pass away. Here's an example:
"They would be bound and dragged through the mud for a mile to the scaffold. There they would be hanged, cut down and disembowelled. Their entrails would be hauled from their bodies and held in front of their faces as they died, and then their limbs would be hacked off and displayed on spikes, to be picked bare by the birds."
No walk in the park to be sure and compounding their problems, there were no comparable young female matches in the village to Elizabeth, but - you guessed it. There was a boy from a local family called Neville. He was a gawky, angular youth a year or so younger than Elizabeth, who had been the princess’s companion and fellow pupil for the past few weeks. And with no time to look further afield for a stand-in, Parry and Lady Ashley took the desperate measure of forcing the boy to don his dead friend’s clothes. The deception worked and the two started in earnest to train the boy to be a princess.
My only comment , where's the problem here with Princess training? The village kid probably always wanted to be a princess like most of us. Unlike most of us though, we didn't all go on to be queens!
I've teased you enough with the story, go here for more.
"The bones of Elizabeth I, Good Queen Bess, lie mingled with those of her sister, Bloody Mary, in a single tomb at Westminster Abbey. But are they really royal remains — or evidence of the greatest conspiracy in English history? If that is not the skeleton of Elizabeth Tudor, the past four centuries of British history have been founded on a lie. And according to a controversial new book, the lie began on an autumn morning 470 years ago, when panic swept through a little group of courtiers in a manor house in the Cotswold village of Bisley in Gloucestershire."
To cut to the chase, The not so warm and fuzzy Henry VIII was coming to visit his daughter Elizabeth- who in fact was dead. The problem was her governess and guardian would most certainly face the King's wrath for "letting" his heir pass away. Here's an example:
"They would be bound and dragged through the mud for a mile to the scaffold. There they would be hanged, cut down and disembowelled. Their entrails would be hauled from their bodies and held in front of their faces as they died, and then their limbs would be hacked off and displayed on spikes, to be picked bare by the birds."No walk in the park to be sure and compounding their problems, there were no comparable young female matches in the village to Elizabeth, but - you guessed it. There was a boy from a local family called Neville. He was a gawky, angular youth a year or so younger than Elizabeth, who had been the princess’s companion and fellow pupil for the past few weeks. And with no time to look further afield for a stand-in, Parry and Lady Ashley took the desperate measure of forcing the boy to don his dead friend’s clothes. The deception worked and the two started in earnest to train the boy to be a princess.
My only comment , where's the problem here with Princess training? The village kid probably always wanted to be a princess like most of us. Unlike most of us though, we didn't all go on to be queens!
I've teased you enough with the story, go here for more.
Taking Pride
Around Cyrsti's Condo niche in the universe it's the time of year for all the LGBT Pride celebrations. Dayton, Ohio's was almost a couple weeks ago, Yellow Springs is next weekend and the "bestest" of them all around here- Columbus, Ohio's is still a couple weeks away.
This is always a good time of the year to pause and try to reflect on where we "silent T's" sit in the overall scheme of things.
Ancestrally, we do have a tie in of sorts with the Drag Queens who were the original instigators at the Stonewall Bar in 1969. (right)
So many years later, it seems transgender women and men are finally beginning to make a case to be heard.
My own sense of participating in Pride this year is one of liberation. I'm arriving at a point where I can stand alone and be recognized for what I am- a trans woman and for once not be lumped into other categories. Perhaps more importantly now, I can respect my cousins (drag queens and cross dressers) for what they are and feel good about it. As I hope they respect me.
Before I wrap this post up, I thought I would pass along another "historical" video from WigStock in NYC circa 2001.
This is always a good time of the year to pause and try to reflect on where we "silent T's" sit in the overall scheme of things.
Ancestrally, we do have a tie in of sorts with the Drag Queens who were the original instigators at the Stonewall Bar in 1969. (right)
So many years later, it seems transgender women and men are finally beginning to make a case to be heard.
My own sense of participating in Pride this year is one of liberation. I'm arriving at a point where I can stand alone and be recognized for what I am- a trans woman and for once not be lumped into other categories. Perhaps more importantly now, I can respect my cousins (drag queens and cross dressers) for what they are and feel good about it. As I hope they respect me.
Before I wrap this post up, I thought I would pass along another "historical" video from WigStock in NYC circa 2001.
Friday, June 7, 2013
Kristin Beck Speaks Out
CNN's Anderson Cooper 360 seems to have cornered the first Kristin Beck interviews I have been able to see.Go here for an inside look how Kristin was able to live her life as a Navy Seal. Much of what she says sounds very familiar. If you were a transgender vet or not!
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