Making a Difference

This story comes from The Transgender Law Center:

"My name is Drian Juarez, and I am living my authentic life as a proud transgender woman. Getting here wasn’t always easy. Like you, I faced barriers that at times seemed insurmountable – lack of quality health insurance or a stable place to live, and working the streets to earn money. As a child at a time when there weren’t gay-straight alliances, resources, or advocacy for children like myself, I experienced a lot of terrible bullying. Fortunately, I had a grandmonther who loved and nurtured me. She taught me to be myself and be proud of who I was. I remember feeling like if they didn’t understand me or like me, it was their problem. But, I did always feel like an outsider. At the Los Angeles High School for the Arts and in college I was very involved in the arts. I fit-in there, and began to feel a lot more confident. It wasn’t until I graduated college, though, that I came to understand there was a word for what I was – transgender. Today, I am a Program Manager at the Transgender Economic Empowerment Project at the LA Gay & Lesbian Center. Through the connections the Transgender Law Center has with the LA service organizations, I got involved with the Transgender Leadership Summit in 2005. I’ve been to every Summit since! At the summits I have been able highlight the barriers that trans women experience, and hopefully make their lives better."

There is much more to her story of course. Go here to learn more.

Was it Halloween or...

Or a fun night with friends in a neighborhood tavern in Cincinnati?
Actually both as I ended up with four genetic beer drinking jello shot slugging women. Times were rough? Not so much! As you can see in the pictures, I wasn't drinking. Haha.
I would estimate only about a third of the customers were in costume. I told the girls before we got there I was a little apprehensive of walking into a red neck bar, being the only ones in costume and being "underdressed" in huge red hair and boots.

Well, I was right about the no other costumes to begin with. Just one other person- but it was early and the tavern was neighborhood not redneck and none of us got much attention.
Most of the patrons were engrossed in a high school playoff football game on the televisions between two Cincinnati teams-forget Alabama/LSU.

As the night wore on, the bottom picture shows what happened when all of the sudden I experienced wig slippage.  (Haven't worn it much!) .Interestingly enough though,  a newcomer to the table at the same time asked me if the hair was mine. A couple of the other women assured her it was- until I had to adjust it!

Overall, it was one of those evenings that makes you wish Halloween lasted just a little bit longer!

Is That You Kevin?

Give Kevin credit for using his real name (I guess?)

Filipino transgender beauty titlist Kevin Balot beat 21 contestants from 15 countries to be crowned Miss International Queen 2012 in Pattaya, Thailand on Friday, November 2. Kevin?

Miss Transsexual Brazil

Miss Ceara (L) and Miss Sao Paulo compete in the first Miss Transsexual Brazil 2012 contest, in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil on October, 30, 2012. Photograph by: VANDERLEI ALMEIDA, AFP/Getty Images

Just When You Thought

Things were a little toooo serious here in Cyrsti's Condo, lets pass along a Nong Poy model shoot:

It's Autumn in Cyrsti's Condo

In reply to my VA post (Thanks) concerning Autumn Sandeen's gender marker experience, she was kind enough to reply:

"Thank you, Cyrsti. I'm doing what I can for the betterment trans military and veterans because of our active duty and veteran peers...because of you, and to a lesser extent because it helps me too. We trans people deserve better that what we've received over the years. Having many of our peers and me empowering ourselves to work for change -- empowering ourselves to work and sacrifice to achieve ordinary equality for trans people -- changes the world not just for ourselves, but for the generations that come after us. I've currently picked trans active duty and veterans issues to work on because I have some credibility on the subjects. Again, thank you for your kind words. And, thank you for your service -- it's really an honor to serve you. on Thanks!"

Again...thank you Autumn...for all that will come after us!

Out at the Doc's!

FINALLY a project I started with the Veterans' Administration four months ago came to fruition today.
Well, now it was  yesterday when I went but I had to rest up afterwards before I could write this.

In the middle of the morning , I walked into the office of a real live endocrinologist to begin what I call my "phase two" hormone therapy.
I signed the office sign in sheet and immediately faced the problem of name.  The office was the typical doctors office around here that closely resembles the 24 hour convience mart - people behind plastic. No one even saw me when I signed in. Now what? If I used my feminine name-would I ever get called? So, I signed my male name to just expedite the process.
That started the fun when the receptionist read my male name and looked up to see a decidedly un male person to which she said "oh!" My VA ID serves as the form of insurance card with them and is still very male so far.

The receptionist of course had to call in some one else to help with the sign in process which had more to do with the VA than me. By this time, nearly everyone was at ease and I was just another patient with paperwork problems. The question of the day was "Who sent me there?" I answered "I did."
Happily, all the magic connections worked with the VA approval process and I passed (no pun intended) to the mystical maze of little rooms and vestibules of the consultation area.

The first step was the scale which I am learning is not a girls best friend. The nurse even asked if I wanted to put my purse on a nearby counter before I got on the scale. I said yes and asked about shoes, coat and whatever else I could think of. The nurse on this part of my adventure had little or no sense of humor and crummy worn fingernail polish so I dutifully answered the thousand questions- the same ones I entered on the doc's on line portal.
Not to worry, surprisingly my blood pressure made the cut and nurse person went on her mirthless way. She said the "Doctor" will be in soon.

Well, we all know what soon means in a doctor's office-you may get a chance to celebrate another birthday before the Doc shows up to rescue you from the this tiny sterile room. I was starting to feel like I was in the "Wizard of Oz".Could I- would I ever meet him?
Not yet. The next person to visit was a "resident". I'm no medical expert but a resident is someone who follows around "House" or is sexually active on "Grey's Anatomy". It turns out this resident was a nice version of a CIA interrogation.
After nice greetings were out of the way, she jumped right into asking me again about what meds I was taking which I was pretty sure had been already entered at least twice to some system somewhere. Then she jumped into the big question "When did all of this start?" What? Dressing as a girl, starting hormones, watching the sun come up, hating to drive here? What???
Dressing as a girl was what she was fishing for so I said 12. So for the next 15 minutes or so I was explaining how I made it through life navigating a male life and marriages and making it to this point. Wait a minute. Resident or therapist? Where the hell was I?

Finally, for the briefest time it was my turn!  She of course asked if I was heading towards surgery and I zinged her with the concept (true) that I was transgender or gender fluid. I'm sure once she got home yesterday, she was busily Googling both terms.
She finished up and teased me by saying the Doctor (Oz) would be in soon.

Shortly (really) the mist parted and in walked the magic man I have waited four months to see! My heart fluttered. Not that he was a vision of manhood but dammit here he was and he said hello. Almost immediately he lapsed into some sort of version of why the VA was paying my way here anyhow. Quickly though, he calmed down and thought of the paycheck and got down to business...you guessed it...by asking "When did all of this start?" Again? Really? The resident was shadowing the Doc so I shot her the non verbal girl look of really? In the meantime, he was playing a very real male game of domination with me as he asked when and where I served. I shot it back at him. I had come too far to be intimidated by this guy now.

Finally...Again...I came to a point of resolution with Oz. He pulled out his magic pen and scrip sheet and effectively doubled my Estro for the next three months and then I would get blood labs for him and then we would take it from there. Then he left for the maze of rooms, hallways and cubicles and disappeared.
Whew! I was exhausted but I walked away a winner of sorts. I'm fairly certain I'm in the system now and I know the pitfalls of how to get my Va Doc to approve the hormonal blood tests and how I have to basically hand carry them to the other Doc.

All of the sudden, it was time to click my red shoes together (similar to Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz) and go home- to a nap!

Brazilian Trans Beauty Pageant

Transgender Beauty in Brazil

Thanks Michelle-Halloween II-not the Movie

Michelle commented on my "Halloween Post"

" Sorry to disagree, but I have NEVER tried any sort of "drag" halloween costume. It has ALWAYS been a big joke for halloween when any male dresses as ANY form of female. Halloween is my favorite holiday because I put on a huge display in my yard for the neighborhood. Except that hurricane Sandy killed that this year. I have had very sincere friends ask if I had ever done "drag" before and I NEVER have. I NEVER want my female presentation to be even the slightest fodder for humor. This is my life and it is not funny in any way."

 Number one...I agree with you too. I guess I should have offered a little more information.

 My costumes were never designed as being "drag".  Looking back on all the experiences, most were an attempt at presenting myself as a convincing women to the public for the first times in my life.
Ironically, I met my first wife at a Halloween party and ended up coming out to her a couple weeks later and she is the mother of my daughter who so accepts me today. My second wife and I's first big date or so was a Halloween block party. At yet another party, I was approached by a fledgling politician and wife to "go partying with them" at a few other places. That was after they found out I was a guy. They didn't know. Of course he went on to a long and successful political career. They went to Washington and no I didn't go with them.
Another time Halloween happened to fall during a week I was out of town training for a new job and I went to a big straight club's party to see how well it would go and I seemed to fit in quite well. After all, if I was spotted as a guy in heels and mini- it was my costume! Outside of hands straying places on my rear as I walked through the crowded room- the only major reaction was from the girl at the door who carded me.

Halloween just offered me a door to get out and see what I was about...I went to the parties to see how well I could do as a girl and found there was a chance...

Back to you Michelle, I have often wished I too could enjoy Halloween more for the fun although I did used to do some real scary haunted houses as a Santa with a chain saw character.
By the way, your "two cents" is worth quite a bit more!

It's just that I never wanted my presentation to be one of humor either...and it turned out it wasn't!