Over the history of this blog, no post has
ever created the feed back that "
Transgendered Mid Life Crisis?" did.
Of course there are those here on the blog as well in the transgender or transsexual community for what ever reason disagree with waiting until midlife to come to grips with gender problems.
Here is yet another slightly different look from a reader:
"I truly know what you meant about gender quicksand. All my life I have tried to live as would be expected of a hetero-male. All the time knowing that something was out of kilter. As a young child I would always imitate female behavior, was left to care for my siblings during the day, and wore the hand-me-downs from my female cousins. Was made to go to elementary school wearing cotton panties, side zip pants, and colorful outerwear. It felt so natural, but brought-on a lot of teasing.
At that age you don't understand gender bias. The teasing didn't bother me. I knew I was different and sort of withdrew into myself. I got along with girls much more than boys and further identified with them.
As much as I wanted to be like them, I agonized over why I felt so different and began internalizing my feelings.
This is the first time I have ever told anyone, not even my wife. I want to be set free to be who I am and live the rest of my life as I was meant to be."
Of course I have read and commiserated with so many transgendered, transsexual and cross dressers over the years
especially with the growth of the Internet. With those of you who have thought enough of me to share your experiences truly humbles me.
The whole process has instilled in me how totally and completely nearly
all of us have been in our lives living between the gender "rock and a hard place".
Through it all, these absolutes come to mind. The first is "nothing is as bad or as good as it seems". No matter what happens, look for the middle ground. The second is you have to carry your own rope if you are heading for the quicksand. At some point in time you are going to have to take it upon yourself to lasso a rock or tree limb to pull yourself out. You
have to plan on it. These days there is
so much info for trans women and trans men to claim ignorance.
Finally I have met so many of you who are literally hanging on to your lives for dear life and looking over a huge cliff. As a constant reminder, I have the "
Golden Gate Bridge" pictured on my cell phone. It reminds me of the leap of faith I'm taking
Take care my friends, our landing
can be softer than we think!