Transitioning And The Silver Screen

Some of you may remember the post I wrote some time ago when I became totally immersed in a "chick flick".
The moment was one of the first I can remember. 
As with most of my life these days the moment went by and I gave it very little extra thought.
Since then chick flicks have been an afterthought until this morning.  I was working on my book and catching up on emails and I had the television on in the background.  A classic "40's" movie was on and I don't really know who was in it. 
What did happen was I slowly became drawn in to what the women in the movie were feeling.  I was empathizing  with their relationships and lives without even thinking about it.
All of a sudden my new fascination with characters on the silver screen became clearer than a high definition big screen. I was watching from a female point of view. Not as a man relating to a woman or even wanting to be her. No, I was feeling her emotions towards men, other women and life.
Wow! What a revelation!

Weely Horrorscope

Libra (September 23- October 22)
You do know how to present well, but that doesn’t mean that people can’t see through your glossy veneer. Try all you might to appear as if you’ve got it all together, but what really will that get you? If you need help, don’t be shy about accepting it. There is support available and no shame in wanting it. Besides, who really likes perfection anyway? So boring!

From "the Frisky" 
No comment!

When The Face In The Mirror Doesn't Change

As you remove your makeup and you look into your own eyes.  What do you see?
Yourself of course (unless you have some real problems.)
I used to be really depressed as I cleaned my face...the male one looking back at me from the mirror.
Fortunately the depression is starting to fade.
No I haven't started nay hormones yet or went through any facial feminizing surgery. The difference is I'm beginning to see past the face and into the eyes. 
Two things are beginning to occur. 
I see some of the inner me...increasingly less male and I don't do grudge drag anymore. 
Grudge drag is a very uncomplimentary term from the days when I felt I had to venture out dressed female.
The transition from wanting to to having to being who I am has been a long process.
Now the mirror has become more than one dimensional. It is allowing me to see the real me.

Sexuality vs Sensuality.

Can we agreed men are sexual beings and women are sensual? OK I know I'm making a sweeping generalization and it's all Janie's fault! In a good way of course. During the past month or so she has written so well about her gender journey. We are very similar in the life path we have decided to follow and I just wish I had her gift of writing about it!
She has questioned her feelings about being female and even prioritized her male side for a period of time to test herself.
At any rate, recently she made the comment again about how she lost the sexual thrill of female clothes years ago.  The same as me.
I began to think of why and how the "why" related to gender stereotypes as a whole.
One hundred and ten thousand years ago when I began my gender journey to the "other side" I did have the sexual thrill of shaving my legs and wearing hose and bra etc.  Now I feel a deep satisfaction when the wind blows my hair over a bare back and shoulders or around my bare legs. I just feel at home somehow, More sensually stimulated. I feel my skin and hair; the sun and the air so much more acutely.
Where and how did this change happen?
Well, basically I came to conclusion that men are sexual beings.  It isn't true that sex is all men think about but it is true they spend a lot of time thinking about it and how it may apply to many females they meet or see.  Nothing evil about it. Men are just reacting to what life is for them and their role in populating the world.
Women on the other hand are sensual beings.  Starting with their breasts and extending head to toe they all have an innate ability to have a sensual connection with the environment. It's why there is a "Mother Nature"  follow this link and read the definition. 
Women are more apt to go barefooted, women play with their hair and pamper their skin and of course possess the all important breasts. Both genders admire and obsess over breasts.  Men of course are easy and really so are women. I have mentioned so many times how I have spent my life working in female dominated workforces. I can not tell you how many times I have heard the breast conversation in regards to another woman they were watching or even among themselves. These days of course buying the breasts of your dreams is not out of the question. I feel the main breast attraction is their sensation to a woman.  When she enters puberty sensations increase which goes a long way in developing a sensuality and is exactly the reason I am attempting to begin some hormone therapy.
I'm jealous. I want to experience that sensation and be more sensual not so much sexual. A journey I unknowingly undertook years ago.
With all the upheaval in our community these days about transsexual this and transgender that, it could be this is a simpler explanation of why some of us have arrived where we are today.
Sure, I will never experience many of the realities of a biological woman. No child birth or monthly periods or even female genitals are in my future. BUT
An increased awareness of the world from the sensual side of nature has been part of me for a while now. It most certainly is time to nurture that awareness.

Fireman Putting Out Wrong Fire.

 According to the "MailOnLine" a An FDNY fireman who posed in a calendar of other firefighters allegedly battered his transsexual girlfriend in a jealous rage two weeks ago.

Miss Charriez told the Post: 'He called me from jail [Thursday] and said he wanted me to write a letter saying it didn't happen.'

An FDNY spokesman told MailOnline that Mr Murphy, who's been with the department for four years, has been suspended.

She was famously disqualified from America’s Next Top Model after it was revealed she was born a man.

Make Up Magic!

This is one of the male stars from the Indian movie "Double Dhamall" If you have never priced the very effective breasts he is wearing, Ive seen them for about 2 grand or so.

I simply love the before and after pix! This is

Paolo Ballesteros aka Precious Paola

The Filipino Answer to Christopher Morley?

I Felt Like A Spy!

At work the other day, the crew jumped into an animated conversation about drag shows. It seemed one of the older women had been invited to join some friends at a prominent gay club for a show.
I listened with great interest (of course) to the discussion.  The group was several "20" somethings and a couple of the women were going positively nuts about how the best looking women in the room at the show they went to were guys.
The one woman who was invited hated the whole idea and was very negative.  I didn't hear her remarks first hand but expected the gay/trans slurs.
Even more interesting was the comments on the man who used to come quite a bit dressed as...you guessed it...a woman.
I was so proud of the group who applauded him for living his life the way he wanted to and how about his great taste in purses! Unfortunately, they said they hadn't seen him for awhile.
I said absolutely nothing. Didn't have to. I was so proud of how the group approached our culture. Keep in mind all of this took place in a relatively rural town in Ohio.
Maybe things are really getting better!

Horoscopes!

From the Frisky  I thought I would share my latest horoscope. With everythiong that is happening now in my personal life the "scope" could be interesting!
I'm a Libra by the way.

"Despite what you might hear, you are going to have to pay attention to your intuition, as it’s going to be at its peak now and can lead you out of pending despair -- if you bravely face the truth and its consequences. Yes, we’d all like to see the world with rose-colored glasses, right now, you should know that point of view will eventually catch up with you in a bad way."

Hmmm that make it's all so clear! lol

the Frisky by the way is a great girl site that gives you insight into everything girl from fashion to lifestyle to guys!

Womanless Revisited.

I happened across this older picture of an "amateur" contest in a womanless pageant I believe was held in Mississippi. Obviously his first time dressed as a girl?

These boys are from a baseball team in the South. You have the love the bow in the cheerleaders hair!

Last and least, just a one of my "dark pix!

Thanks
Cyrsti