Follow Up!

Time goes by so quickly. It does not seem possible the big Monday Night Football trip is now 3 weeks old.
Some have asked for more info about the evening! and what I would do different.
I already discussed the biggest factor...me! I had a real hard time relaxing that evening and letting the night play out. I didn't wear my team jersey which I do wear to sports bars when I watch them on TV.  Why? I was searching for the best possible outfit. I needed to stay warm and look the best I could.  The night turned out to be so mild that a long sleeved shirt under my jersey would have been fine.  Ironically, the jersey is long enough that it gives me a good body shape when I wear it with my favorite old hippie bell bottoms.
OK, enough is enough about fashion. I didn't practice what I preach. "Attitude" is a huge part of presenting female. Did OK but could have done MUCH better.
I've been through this I know but I thought up some other ideas to pass along.  I thought of what the genders do differently at a sports game.  Being a passionate fan is not restricted to one gender anymore.   The women around us were whooping it up equally with the guys.  The difference is how they do it.  Think about the simple act of clapping as a girl.  The biggest difference is clapping with breasts.  You naturally have to do it different The "girls" can get in the way! But that's not all. Many women clap with their palms almost touching and their hands facing each other. Not crossed palm like guys when they clap.
Finally, you can't let out this deep roar when your team scores.  Unless you are real good with your voice, you can go my route and be enthusiastic with a "Yay"! I always thought all of this would be a detriment when I watched the game as a girl. It really isn't and sometimes you will catch the eye of a guy who appreciates a knowledgeable female fan. I'm just careful not to know too much!
Another one of the simple guy things at a game is buying a beer.  Not as simple when that male face is on the ID you are showing to the beer vendor!  I was happy the guy I bought off of carded everyone one but me  He barely looked up at a old broad and sold me a beer. lol. I was unhappy when I found NFL rules forbid the sale of more than one beer per person. I was trying to buy two which meant I had to go and come back for another for my friend.
Actually there are two simple solutions to the beer problem.  Buy the beer in the stands where the vendors normally don't check ID's. It's still the same cheap beer for the same ridiculous price.
Finally, the thought that weighed on my mind the most was the group could have stopped anywhere for food before the game.  The good point to this is-all three others in the group accept me totally as a girl.  The bad thing is-100% of the public doesn't. In the worst way I didn't want to cause any problems for my friends!
While it's true I'm well on the way to feeling really natural in the female world, it is always so easy to fall back and do something which screams GUY!
That too was one of my Monday night worries.
Is that enough paranoia for you? It is for me!
On the bright side, the group is already planning another game for all of us. Something went right!
The evening was actually my second trip to an event. Went to a "Joe Cocker" outdoor concert two summers ago. He was terrible but the night was fun and the only attention I received was from a couple down the row.
I believe that was the evening I learned to applaud different!
I hope I answered a few more questions and didn't bore you girls too much!
If you are into sports I am a Bengals fan and you can feel sorry for me now or call me stupid!  If you are not, the Bengals have been one of the worst NFL teams for decades!
I have learned the internet is really world wide! Can't get anything past me!
Actually Australia and Brazil are in my top 5 list and I thank all of you! I'm sure your Aussie football Or "footy" is every bit as tough as the NFL! But I never said that!

IS It Just Me?

For some reason I just hate being called a "gurl" or "gurrl".
For starters the names are "grinder words" like Scranton or Yonkers. (no offense to either of these places!)
The words just aren't pretty. They provide a mental picture of a guy in hose and heels smoking a big cigar.
Yes they do reference the fact the person you are seeing isn't a 100% genetic female BUT I for one feel 100% real girl when I am one.  I want my inner girl to shine through!
It is very difficult to come up with a term to use with us because we are so varied. I've seen the word "tranny" called a gender slur like "f__"
In addition some trans girls are so beautiful, you have to have a word to tell you they are trans if they are not in "stealth" mode. Stealth means they are living totally as a woman with no reference whatsoever to their previous life or gender.
I don't have the magic word to replace the "g" words above except "she" of course. I also don't have the answer to those of you who are admirers. Again maybe you are not involved as deeply in the transgendered culture and that's fine.
Please don't call me "gurl" and I'll love you! (For at least a couple seconds!)

Love Conquers Gender?

"Back in the day" I knew a gorgeous Trans Girl. Can't say I really knew her well enough to slap a label on her.I didn't know if she was  a really accomplished CD or more. She could really handle herself well as a "she" is all I really knew.
I knew her from a monthly get together and one month I asked where is Renee? I was told she had met a woman, got engaged and was no longer dressing as a girl.
Being the cynic that I am, I always wondered how long that would last? Most all of us have been through the dark times of "purges" and the like. I never found out about "Renee" unless she happens to read this.
I never have changed my belief that you can't just walk away from this life but maybe you've seen this story about a person who did.
From the DailyMail:

He spent £100,000 on cosmetic operations and tooth veneers to create the ‘ultimate male ­fantasy’ and was so convincing as a woman he had no trouble attracting men, and was briefly engaged to a wealthy landowner.
Initially thrilled by his transformation, life as a woman quickly paled despite a jetset lifestyle in Monaco.
He hated the way female hormones made him moody and emotional. Shopping bored him and sex was a disappointment.
No matter how feminine he looked, he felt he was merely playing a role.
So, five years ago, Charles spent a further £25,000 on three operations at the gender clinic at London’s Charing Cross Hospital to turn him back into a male.

If you would care to follow his story further, there are after photos too.  He should have stayed female! The irony is that he has the money to do it.

Catching up!

Sometimes I think I'm in this giant rut!
Last night I went to my sports pub on a very busy night and watched the beginning of the real college hoops season without so much as a comment or look from anyone. Saturday was the same way.  My outfit was a football jersey and jeans Saturday.
I wonder if this is what it would be like full time? Just being out as me...a girl and why now?
I suspect there are a couple factors. Number one is hair style and color. Here on the blog, I have some other pictures of me in other hair.  Well, I've decided on the red. My friends like it as do I.  If I believe I can wear it with confidence all the time-that is half the battle.
I hate to admit to the other. Makeup! All of the sudden (after years) I subtly changed the way I'm applying it.
I changed my approach to my eye make up for the better.  For years I was told my eyes were the most dramatic part of my look so I emphasized them. Too much so on occasion.  Recently I've tried to make the eyes dramatic but with less. Emphasizing the line of the eye with out doing much with the lids themselves.  This allows me to bring out my eyebrows.  My brows are very thin to start with and I'm able to color them to match the hair and bring them out. At least for now all of this seems to be working. My acceptance level is at an all time high. BUT you are thinking what the heck is her problem???
It's complex, but I'll give this a shot. I follow two people closely and a couple of their ideas enter into this.
"Stana" at Femulate and I are somewhat on the same path of public presentation. She has mentioned she is to the point that it is getting to be all so natural (I paraphrase). Stana is a "hose and heels" girl! I respect her sense of style and fashion but my world is quite different. That is the fun part!
Fun, brings me to the other influence I have and she is "Janie" who I've mentioned here a number of times. Janie once had a post basically asking is it more fun to present female or to spice your outfit up and be a great looking guy in a dress? (paraphrasing again)
I have succeeded temporarily in the first part. That's the rut I'm in.  Where's the fun?.  Even at the NFL game I walked, looked and talked like a girl and was accepted. I dress in nice fashionable clothes but nothing with heels, jeans and sweaters. I get some looks but the same as any middle aged female would get...from middle aged guys.
Yes I could ramp it up again! I have the boots, leggings and clothes to do it.  Doing that risks the gains I've made as a person, so it is not as easy as it seems.
So I guess if you see someone peeking at you over a hill, it's just me in my rut.  It's all good. Sigh!

Better Sex Through Chemistry.

Better sex through chemistry? Absolutely girls! But not the way you think.
Several posts ago, I touched on a few of the basic hormonal theories about testosterone.
As it turns out some in our community have taken these theories even farther. All the way to sexual attraction.
At some point in our lives, most of us been strongly attracted to someone, Not love-attraction. It happened to me a couple weeks ago as I was in my male mode. I work with the public and this women and I were positively in dream mode.  I could see it in her eyes and I'm sure see could see it in mine.
Some feel the attraction is a basic chemical one. If you think of the human as an animal, all of this isn't so far fetched.  Men are very visual sexually. The sheer numbers of sperm produced causes them to be less selective.
Women of course are basically the opposite.  Fewer eggs to fertilize causes them to be more selective.
Into the middle of all of this throw in pheromones and better yet the trans girl!
This has more possibilities than a politician on the take.
If the trans girl has a spouse and begins female hormone therapy, does she smell different to the spouse? Yes, according to one Hub Page post I read. In fact the spouse said smell was the first change she noticed. Does the trans girl care? Probably not. If she is in the market for a man, the breast development, softer skin and less body hair would most likely give her more satisfaction with guys. If she is the market for women, I have a different theory.
Let's assume the trans girl is NOT on hormones. If she presents well enough she could still attract guys...but how about women? I don't know, but on very rare occasions I've encountered women who were positively entranced with me. Not attracted-entranced. A whole different meaning. They were not so much into how I looked. They were into what I was.
Could have this been chemical? Did my intact male hormones react to the female attention and could that have been part of the potent attraction?
How does all of this theory affect a post op TS? In theory, she wouldn't have much of a sex drive because of low testosterone. If she was into men, could she smell them and react as a genetic woman? If a man walked by would she react on a subconscious level sexually?
I find all of this fascinating and a great discussion that could go on forever. The fact of the matter is, chemicals inside you could be controlling more than you think. As a man or a woman, or somewhere in between.

Quick Quote!

Just another quote from an old source! This again comes from a yahoo group I'm still allowed in!
The quote comes from Sue Johanson who was a sex therapist on the radio for many years before the currant crop said "crossdressing is an affection a man has and his wife suffers from." She said the crossdresser is fine, he will find his way but it's the wife who needs treatment".

I'm not so sure this was a real positive quote among TG spouses but regardless, Sue wasn't flashy and could say a lot in a few words! She also sounded like your granny telling you about sex. One of the reasons she didn't make it past Ophra and Jerry?

What IF?

Working on very little sleep this morning, I made a quick deduction I had no food in the house.
Since I'm off today, I figured I would make the quick trip down the street to a convenience store that sells those breakfast biscuits. Not healthy but a quick hunger fix.
As always, I looked around to notice the other females in the store  No surprises as they were all dressed in jeans and sweat shirts. The only makeup on anyone was probably the trace of left over mascara on my eyes.
I started to think...if I was genetic female how would I be dressed?
Would I have taken the time to put on a little mascara and lip gloss? Would my jeans fit a little better?  How about my hair? If I didn't take the time to brush it out, would I have least pulled it back or hidden it under a hat? Was I a hypocrite? My guy clothes were a little on the shabby side and I was unshaven. The rough, casual male look! lol!
I would like to think I would do all  the girl work above.
How much time would that have taken? I can go from guy to girl in about a half hour. Certainly I could go from girl to presentable girl in five minutes. Would have growing up as a girl erased my passion for looking the best I can? I hope not!
Years ago my very attractive sister in law would always take the time to so some eye work before ever leaving the house. She would say "I never know whom I going to meet and what is HE going to think of me."
She had a lot going for her to start with and she always tried to make herself better. You see that with a lot of attractive women.
Or do you?  What came first, good looks or good makeup?  Looks for sure but attractive women just seem to care more. That makes them attractive! There are many women do a wonderful job of looking nice but just as many around here who haven't seen a make up isle since Clinton was in office.
Life goes on. I grabbed my taste treats and headed home to the delight of two begging dogs.As I returned , I was safe in my belief I would put effort into being a presentable woman. Even if I was genetic. All was right in my little transgender world.
After all, it was time to turn my thoughts to what football jersey, boots and jeans I will be wearing this afternoon. It's game day and I'm watching college football with a girlfriend. It's a challenge to look girly in a football jersey but  I've watched many women look really feminine doing it. I plan on giving it my best shot!
Most of the time a little effort produces great results!

"Viewing" A good Idea?

During a mindless bout of channel surfing I ended up on "The View". For those of you lucky enough to know nothing about it, "The View" features four or five women such as Whoopi Goldberg and Barbra Walters. The girls discuss current topics and even manage to get in trouble on occasion. Not my cup of tea, even if it is served properly by Martha Stewart.  I would rather watch the trashy Kardashians and wonder how Kim does her eye makeup. Am I the only one to think Bruce Jenner is the biggest girl on that show?
At any rate, as soon as I flipped on the girls, they started talking about that poor kid who got so much publicity for wanting to go out on Halloween as a female Scooby Doo character. Their point was if the boy did it...Dad should have done it too.
Not a bad idea! Why should the ordeal have fallen directly on Mom's shoulders?
If my feeble mind serves me correct, wasn't there an old "Life according to Jim" TV show episode with a similar topic? The son wanted to be a female character on Halloween and after some protest Jim put on a dress and went with him.
The cynical side of me thinks that Mom wanted all this publicity? Boys being girls on Halloween has obviously been going on forever. In my youth, the kid down the street who was transformed into a very pretty girl never made the press. Most kids like that probably never dressed up like a girl again. Totally unlike the kid who went as a football player and now spends most of his time as a girl. (Guess who?)
So as always, "The View" missed the true point. In typical fashion, one of them made some off the wall comment about a man walking around in their underwear.  The conclusion? It was OK if it wasn't their man!
My expectations were low and they were met. Now what channel are the Kardashians on?

Indian Summer In Ohio

Days like yesterday we pay for later around here!Veteran's Day (A big thanks to all of you) Sunshine and high's near 70?
To top it all off...a day off.  I ran some mundane errands during the morning  and then got ready to go about 4 ish.
Plenty of time to roam the one mall I go to and take advantage of a free appetizer coupon at a restaurant.
I was forced to stop for gas at the last station in town. Car just doesn't run without it! As I pulled in, I did notice the television news van parked at one of the pumps.
I started to pump my gas and here he comes. Mr. young reporter enthusiastically asking me questions about a story that happened yesterday.  What was I doing, what did I think? I answered and then he said would I like to come over to the van and talk to them?
I quickly said "No, I have to be at work." He insisted and I said no I REALLY have to be at work and jumped in my car.
That would have been a real hoot.  A TV on TV! I can hear it now. Hey, there was a person who looked a lot like you on the 6 o clock news. Do you have a twin sister?
First the NFL this week and now this!
Well it didn't happen and the remainder of the day was pure heaven. I was able to be the real me with no negative public reaction. So much fun mixed in with relaxation is difficult to find!
I'm sure soon the warmer weather will be difficult to find to! I'm prepared though! Fuzzy warm sweater and fur lined boots are standing by to battle the elements!