The Greatest Conflict of All?

Connie recently commented:

"The vast majority of people grow up and live their whole lives without thinking about their genders. They become aware of gender at an early age, and that, most certainly, affects their general thinking. We, on the other hand, struggled with the dysphoria as we became aware of our gender flux"

I attempted to explain exactly that to my Grand Kids and sometimes even others. Again this weekend, I became extremely aware at how others can't even conceive what we go through. Fortunately any more  I don't need to carry around a chip on my shoulder or bitterness by this time in my life-it is what it is being transgender.

Back to this weekend, Liz and I went to a Lavender Festival plus a Summer Solstice Ritual Saturday and Sunday. A few of the group (we are members of)  braved the monsoon downpours Saturday and met again Sunday. In the group are four or five tweener girls who have become increasingly fascinated with me.

They are losing their shyness and are asking my name-slowly but surely they are warming up, which I love. After all, it wasn't so long ago girls their age were my worst fear when I first opened the door and began to cross dress in public. 

Connie went on to write:  "As I was standing in the grocery line yesterday, I surveyed the covers of the magazines on the rack. People Magazine had a full-face picture of a young Bruce Jenner, along with a smaller insert from Caitlyn's Vanity Fair shoot. The headline read something like: "Good-bye Bruce; Hello Caitlyn". That got me to thinking (like I said, you can't ever get over it completely) about how others misunderstand us. It's not as simple as "good-bye/hello". Just because we may have lived our lives in a flux about gender, we don't discount our pasts through MTF transition. Of course, I used to fantasize about a "magic wand" myself, so I don't blame others for thinking that, just because I've come out, I am a totally different person. "

Of course in some ways those girls do equate me with Caitlyn Jenner and what Connie wrote. While I am sure I will never have the opportunity to sit down with any or all and chat further about a new world of gender awareness they will be a key part of. One never knows! And of course, when their kids meet transgender classmates or friends, we won't be quite as confusing.

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Kerplunk! Heads up! Another Sunday edition is hitting your virtual front porch. Here in Ohio, we are taking a brief break from a typical steamy summer with torrential rainfalls which are the remnants of Hurricane Bill. Lets get started.

Page One-The Week that Was or Wasn't:  Last week, the remarkable run of transgender orientated media programming continued with the announcement of  another transgender teen, Nicole Maines making her acting debut this Tuesday on national television. She will be on this weeks episode of the USA Network show (Tuesday where I live) Royal Pains. **Note, this link may take you to a video.

If you remember, Maines, a 17-year old high school senior, made headlines when she won a Maine transgender rights case. The ruling saw the Maine Supreme Judicial Court guarantee the right of a transgender child to use the school bathroom designated for the gender with which he or she identifies.

Page Two- Dad's Day.- It's Father's Day again. I have no idea if other countries in the world have an equivalent. Around here, it draws the natural comparison between it and Mother's Day.Of course, the Mom's get the credit. In the transgender community I am going out on on a limb and write most of us for one reason or another worshiped our Mom's while our Father's remained distant. In my case, my Dad was an extraordinary provider while at the same time providing a strong moral compass. But, he was an a distant man...a WWII and Great Depression self made man. So Dad (who passed years ago) - I still wouldn't know what to get you for Father's Day. But, the more I read about the effect of single parent homes today-you were a star. Thanks I owe you a lot.

Page Three.-Summer Solstice.- Today also happens to be the longest day of the year and time to wrap this up and head to a celebration of sorts in a nearby park. Be safe and (as always) thanks for joining me here in Cyrsti's Condo! 

A Cyrsti's Condo Salute to Father's Day

No boring tie for this Dad on Father's Day!



James Ross in his drag role as Tyra Sanchez, with his son Jeremiah.  Portraits by Jeffrey Salter

Cyrsti's Condo DAMMIT!

Unidentified Pinterest Cross dresser

Jim! I don't have the key. I forgot and locked the hotel door behind me!!! It's going to be difficult telling the wives I was just "playing"sissy for you when the wives get back from shopping.

You Get to See What I Choose to Show You!

In recent posts here in Cyrsti's Condo, we have discussed how the world see's a transgender person. By now, even the average person has some sort of understanding of who they "think" we are because of Caitlin Jenner, Laverne Cox etc. 

Not a real surprise in that for most of our lives-we don't know what to think. At the point I did and interacted with the world, I came to my own realization my gender feelings were a highly personal, fluid and powerful part of my life. Selfishly, I discovered my gender was but a mirror. It was A mirror when I was kid walking down the hallway the first time in a dress and make up. When I transitioned more completely into the public, I compared my feminine life as stepping out of the mirror and into the "real world."

These days, I think I am coming full circle again. (One of the benefits of being old.) I still feel the highly personal nature of my personal gender, but now feel even a deeper sense of humor in letting the public see what they "think" they see in me. Only I know for sure!

After all, they don't have a life.

While My Blog Gently Weeps

Everytime I write one of these posts, I fervently hope it will be my last.  

The older I get now it seems the world has turned on it's end-again. First came the tragedy of the racially motivated attack in South Carolina. I was a "tweener" when the real impact of the Civil Rights movement took effect in the 60's.  While I am not naive enough to think racism was ever dead and buried in our country, I was fond of telling my grandkids of how their great grandmother went to local Klan meetings in a horse drawn wagon-and now we have a biracial president. 

Then, this morning a Cincinnati policeman was shot and killed on duty.

I wish I could pretend I was smart or powerful enough to even suggest ways to end this madness.  And, I have not even mentioned the issue of gun control.

I still think the somewhat "romantic" idea of a "gun in every house" because we (America) are a youngish country is still alive. After all that is the only reason the Germans or Japanese didn't attack in World War II! was we were armed. Finally, toss in all the meth heads or heroin addicts with automatic weapons and a good time will be had by all! 

What I do propose is, ALL of the nearly 20 candidates who are running for president need to not be allowed to steer the issues away from the basics.

Stop bitching about gay marriage and transgender rights and get to work on fixing what's broken. Before it's too late.

No Trans Pain From Maine!

Transgender student Nicole Maines (center) with her father, Wayne Maines (left), and brother Jonas, speaks to reporters outside the Penobscot Judicial Center, Wednesday, June 12, 2013, in Bangor. (Robert F. Bukaty | AP/Pool)

From: The Bangor Daily News:

Maine’s most famous transgender teen is making her acting debut next Tuesday on national television.

USA Network announced today that Nicole Maines will star in an upcoming episode of the show “Royal Pains”.

Maines, a 17-year old high school senior, made headlines when she won a Maine transgender rights case. The ruling saw the Maine Supreme Judicial Court guarantee the right of a transgender child to use the school bathroom designated for the gender with which he or she identifies.

The episode titled “The Prince of Nucleotides” — set to air 10 p.m. Tuesday, June 23 —  will feature Nicole as she plays a trans choreographer who discovers that the hormones she’s taking may be putting her health at risk.

Follow all the links for more!!!

Letting My Transgender Flags Fly

I recently added another "Pride" sticker to the back of my "Rolls Royce!" "TOhio" stands for "Trans Ohio" and the Leelah Alcorn is self explanatory!

It Was All An Act

My friends are absolutely the best. I have two generic girl friends aside from my partner Liz who I talk about here in Cyrsti's Condo quite a bit.

We all got together last night. As I said, they are really cool about me not wanting to talk about Caitlin Jenner. But it happened, and we did. Per norm, Nikki is never afraid to speak her mind while Kim is a tad more laid back.  To put it bluntly, she has never cared less about my past. Nikki doesn't really either but she will rock my boat every now and then. I could see it in her face a Caitlin Jenner question was coming. 

After knowing Nikki for over six years now, I always enjoy playing verbal "tag" with her. The question was how did I view Jenner talking about her past as an Olympic hero and did I judge her gender when she did it. I said she was a male then. She asked about my past-especially in the military. Good question! I said male and it was the only way I could do it. But, similar to Caitlin Jenner, it was all an act. 

At that point, in classic feminine style, she asked (nicely) "so was I lying about my life like "Bruce" and even Rachel Dolezal. "  By this point in time I have been sufficiently experienced in woman to woman communication and just said "Yes, I was lying and I was one hell of a macho actor!"  On the other hand, I do have a real understanding of what Caitlin Jenner, Laverne Cox and so many other transgender women and men have gone through.

And just that quick, the topic we never talk about was over. I was just their friend again. I love them!