Becoming Transgender Handy

Last night I went to the "movin' picture show" to escape my part of the country's turn to experience "hell on earth" temperatures.

I was a good citizen and paid for my ticket and headed to the concession stand to help the theatre pay for their air conditioning. As the teen aged girl put together my massive order of a buttered popcorn and a Coke I noticed how incredibly delicate she was. I mean over the top delicate. Her movements and the current incarnation of The Great Gatsby movie I watched started my thought process into the entire dynamic of hands and the transgender woman.

Early as I started to explore the feminine side of the world as a cross dresser,  I viewed my hands as a huge barrier to presenting as a woman.  There was the pesky problem of hair on my knuckles, nail care and the size of my paws. Just what was a trans girl to do?

Ironically, the hair problem was easy. At that time I worked in a very busy broiler driven restaurant. If you are ever around a really good broiler cook, they judge the doneness of their steaks by touch. They naturally burn the hair off their hands. So when I was looking for a new cook and he said he could broil, I would look for hair on his hands. if he had any-he wasn't that good. On occasion I had to get in the way and help on the broiler, so I had the easy answer for hairless hands.

My nails were easy too.  The temporary "stick on" nail products did a great job. If there was a problem, the wrong kind of nail drew extra attention to my hands. Later I began to learn the basics of nail length, shape and color. Many flatter, just as many don't.

Most importantly, my hands weren't huge. All of the sudden the problems I experienced in football or basketball due to "small hands" began to benefit. In no way do I have dainty hands but I'm told I have proportional hands. Who knows, maybe it's just another passive aggressive compliment but one way or another I had to move on with what I had.

The biggest problem I faced was nothing I just mentioned.  I was faced with the "operational" issue of talking with my hands. Again, a couple of hurdles to clear. The first of course was if  I talked with my hands, people would notice them and two I was completely unprepared to do it. The whole process very much falls into the feminine way of doing business. When men do it, the process is very directional or even violent. I don't like you so Boom! here is my fist communicating with your face.

My answer was to compromise.  At the time I was already being indoctrinated into the feminine non verbal communication world which included a series of taps or touches for effect on occasions.  I learned to try to keep my hands close to my body to gesture or touch and to not use my hands as paws to grab something. I didn't have to go over the top like the concession girl but I did want to gently find something in the black hole known as my purse.

Becoming transgender handy is never an easy process.   As with anything else in the transgender process though, almost anything is possible if you handle it right.

Coming Out Transgender in the Workplace

It's encouraging to see sites such as xoJane  put together thought provoking insights into the issues transgender women and transgender men face in the world. Follow the link above to take a look.

A Tribute to the Late Michael Andrews

On the Crysti's Condo,  big screen classics from the beautiful female impersonator:

The "Trans Rock" Returns!

All right kids, this trans girl has been known to try one or two crazy things, but a friend of mine has me topped.

She too is a transgender woman by the name of "R". I have decided to invoke my Cyrsti's Condo non disclosure clause and shorten her two syllable  name to the "Rock".

It seems 'the Rock" has signed up for a mini hot dog eating contest at the pub where the two of us plus a trans guy make up the Three Transgender Amigo's or Amiga's in two of our cases. The contest is not how many of the health food delights you can eat. It's how fast you can eat them and yes the competition comes complete with a release form that if you choke to death-it's your fault.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm for transgender competition at all levels. I will be slowly enjoying an adult beverage during our 6000 degree heatwave while she does this. If she doesn't back out and let the entire transgender world down.

I just hope she wins, doesn't choke and upchucks on the floor! How disgustingly unfeminine! In which case I will do the natural thing and say "I don't know her!"...give me another beer.

Hopefully though I hope I will be able to see the slow motion replay on ESPN's Sports Center! But I doubt it.

Another possibility when she wins, I can get her to sign me up as her manager. I could set up a tour and start marketing the "Trans Rock Rules" T-Shirts everywhere!

Look at Rude Paul...that clown got away with it.

Transgender Success in the Workplace!

From the Washington Blade:

"Mia Macy"

"Transgender victims of workplace discrimination are for the first time finding restitution in a pair of decisions handed down from the federal government finding anti-trans job bias at two institutions — one a federal contractor, the other an arm of the U.S. government.

 The two decisions — first reported by Buzzfeed — are the result of the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, which is charged with enforcing laws against workplace discrimination, finding last year in a historic, unanimous decision transgender workplace discrimination amounts to gender discrimination under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act. One of the decisions is the culmination of litigation in that very case, known as Macy v. Holder, was initiated by the Transgender Law Center after the plaintiff was told she wouldn’t receive a job at the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms & Explosives’s crime laboratory in Walnut Creek, Calif., after she announced she would transition from male to female.

 On July 8, the Department of Justice — to which the case was remanded after the EEOC made its decision last year — issued a final decision finding Macy indeed faced discrimination when she applied for the position and awarding her relief."

Go here for more.

Day Old Sushi and Zombies for Breakfast

I'm glad Pat and others have questioned my use of the "Zombie" term in a recent Cyrsti's Condo post. Since I just might have a tendency to veer off the beaten path on occasion, I can understand! To clarify my position I went to Dictionary.com:
"A zombie is a person whose behavior or responses are wooden, listless, or seemingly rote; automaton. b. an eccentric or peculiar person.
I was disappointed! No where could I find a "c" definition which said "a leering face or faces in a crowd with  unmoving inhuman smirks on their faces".

So I guess that's the direction my pea brain was moving kids!

On a brighter note, my public life as a transgender woman went back to it's basic normal the next day. I saw no zombies peering from behind trees and cars as I went about my everyday life. I was relieved because I gladly would have given up my on sale- grocery store sushi for safe passage!

And on a serious note, zombie night was a wake up call. I have the tendency to forget my transgender journey is far from over and on occasion I slip up and flip too far back into my dark side or very simply don't pay enough attention to my appearance.

We all know if we show those pesky zombies any weakness, they don't hesitate to respond.

Now if you will excuse me, my sushi will be extra good with plenty of soy sauce!

All The Makeup Mistakes I Have Made!

I picked this video for the Cyrsti's Condo big screen because this person someone captured all the make up mistakes I have made in two minutes!

Cyrsti's Condo Quote of the Day

You know you are old when:

"If all of the sudden not only does everyone under the age of 30 look like a teenager but the people on the "I've fallen and can't get up" commercials look your age. Or:

When someone says it's time to "throw in the towel, you can't because you don't have enough strength to lift it!"

Cyrsti

Enough with the Zombies!

I rarely spend the extra time and energy to get upset about a situation, but last night was getting to that point.

I met with two trans friends (one male and one female) at a relatively liberal pub which does have a mixed clientele of straight, gay and lesbian peeps. For some reason last night, I was attacked by the 20 something zombie leering women.  Look, I'm used to the so called little "I know what you are looks".  Is it too much to ask for you not to lean in towards me to do it?

Fortunately, it's happening less and less these days, so I was surprised when the zombies were out last night. Furthermore all of you know I really don't care what the public thinks. I own who I am. I know it's too much to ask to cut back the stupid reactions but I have a plan.  Maybe I should redo my business cards and just hand them out to each zombie.  Word them very simply "Yes I am a Transgender Woman" feel free to ask any respectful question you have-but don't just walk by with that incredibly cheesy look on your face. I could rant on but I ran out of room on my imaginary card already.

I know I'm speaking to the choir here in Cyrsti's Condo.

The comment made by my trans woman friend last night said it perfectly: "Maybe after a certain time here, they don't serve our kind in here?"

No, they do and I was the unpaid free entertainment. I could have at the least got a free drink. I got more attention than the two women singing.