So...You Want to be a Girl?

I recently posted this on " Hub Pages".  The idea is one we have shared here so I thought I would bring it back.

"Yes I'm a transgendered male who wants to be a woman. The idea is as natural to me as it is foreign to you. You see I was born male but live female most of the time. I can't even begin to consider what a life in one gender would be like. I am transgendered.
I used to envy the majority of human beings who were born exclusively into one gender. A boy always knew he was a boy and a girl always knew she was a girl..Right? How easy that must be! No gender struggles with society, peer groups, family and friends.
How does it feel to always feel secure in public as a man or a woman, never having to worry about being exposed?
Think of the money and extra time I would have saved if I had never felt the need to not be what I was born to be
What deep obsession led me down a path most of you will never understand? If I could tell you in a thousand words or less, I would have a chance at some obscure "Nobel" prize. The only fact I can tell you is I feel the need to cross into my non birth gender as much as you feel the need not to. Does it make any sense I don't understand you as much as you don't understand me?
I do understand both of us will probably never understand why and that is perfectly fine. The problem is when you don't understand and try to hurt me. Hurt can be applied in many forms. The worst of course is physical. At times, a beating is the easy way out and death is the harshest punishment administered. Just for a lack of understanding.
Hurt can also come in small yet effective doses. I've grown used to the stares and side glances. The hurt never goes away when I hear the nasty little comments or hear the giggles. All of that too I've learned to live with, it's part of the territory and try as I might I try to not think of your imperfections such as weight or appearance.
Think of my dilemma this way. When you developed your gender identity, it was difficult enough to find your way. Your path was lit however. At the least you knew you were a boy or girl. You had role models and maybe even mentors who helped show you the way to becoming a man or a woman. You weren't on the outside looking in.
Understand I'm not looking for your sympathy. For what reason I was put on my path as sure as you were put on yours. I'm only seeking standard human acceptance. I'm no better or worse than you. In fact I'm the same.
The only benefit I may have is a better understanding of you. The pain and suffering of crossing the gender border has not left me unscathed. I have learned the hard way bits and pieces of what makes both genders operate. Ironically that very understanding makes some of you afraid of me. Somehow you feel I have no right to be in your world even though I'm not. Just crossing public paths shopping, eating or whatever does not put me in your world and I have no super sneaky bad intentions! I am not using my knowledge of both genders to fool you or hurt you in any way. In fact the opposite is true! I crave your acceptance of my true gender.
So, I wanted to be a girl and finally came to accept my transgender status as sure as you accepted yours.
Now I have to accept the fact most of us will never understand each other's gender journey and that's fine. Surely in this great big world we can find room for one another. You do have the edge however. When you see me for who I am, my life finally becomes complete."

Looking for a Transgender Therapist?

Check this blog "Walking in Two Worlds: A Trans Therapist 's Journey" if you are searching or thinking of searching for a therapist who has transgendered experience.
The author is "Sherri Lynne" who is not only a psychotherapist but a trannsexual  woman too.
The post is rather lengthy but is very informational and well done.
I don't really know how my VA therapist was assigned to me but I feel very lucky she was.
I was intrigued by two of "Sherri Lynne's" ideas in particular.
The first was her estimate of the number of transsexuals in our society today. She used the number of patients she sees and roughly compared the number to the population within a four hour radius of her practice. She came to the conclusion transgender and or transsexual individuals equal the number of gay people in out society.
I believe her. Business is so good for the doctor I'm going to for hormone therapy that he is closing his family practice, adding a partner and seeing only transgender, gay and lesbian patients.
Her other idea was a use of the drug called "D.E.S.". If you were born between 1938 and 1971 there is a good chance your mother was given the drug during her pregnancy. Of course there is no concrete proof but "D.E.S."has possible  links to higher instances of transgender or transsexual children.
If true at all, you may have had less control over your gender choices than  previously thought.
As I said, if you are considering seeking out a therapist-this is a must read!

Transgender "Two Spirit" World

One of my favorite topics and one I still haven't researched as much as I like; is the status and relationships transgendered individuals carried on in ancient cultures. Specifically Native American.
The "she wired" site  posted a Thanksgiving article reminding us the holiday is not a day of celebration for Native Americans but a day of mourning. In many ways Thanksgiving 1621 was the beginning of persecution and genocide for the numerous tribes.
The "Reverend Irene Moore" went on to remember the role of "two spirited" transgender individuals in the native cultures and how the culture changed:
"Homophobia is not indigenous to Native American culture. Rather, it is one of the many devastating effects of colonization and Christian missionaries that today Two-Spirits may be respected within one tribe yet ostracized in another.
"Homophobia was taught to us as a component of Western education and religion," Navajo anthropologist Wesley Thomas has written. "We were presented with an entirely new set of taboos, which did not correspond to our own models and which focused on sexual behavior rather than the intricate roles Two-Spirit people played. As a result of this misrepresentation, our nations no longer accepted us as they once had."
Traditionally, Two-Spirits symbolized Native Americans' acceptance and celebration of diverse gender expressions and sexual identities. They were revered as inherently sacred because they possessed and manifested both feminine and masculine spiritual qualities that were believed to bestow upon them a "universal knowledge" and special spiritual connectedness with the "Great Spirit." Although the term was coined in the early 1990s, historically Two-Spirits depicted transgender Native Americans. Today, the term has come to also include lesbian, gay, bisexual, and intersex Native Americans.

How unfortunate we weren't influenced more by the ancient cultures. How much easier would life have been?

Just a Girl

Bring It On, the popular 2000
comedy film about cheerleaders starring Kirsten Dunst, Eliza Dushku
and Jesse Bradford, has arrived on stage and is currently touring the
country.
I know you are saying so?

One reason is "Gregory Haney".










and saying this: On "The Edge"

Just a girl...Looking like this:

EDGE: The show sounds like so much fun. Can you talk about how you landed the role of La Cienega?

Gregory Haney: I originally auditioned in LA and then I moved back to New York and they were still looking for the part and so I got invited to another audition for it and I kind of went all out for it. I remember I was at my friend’s house on 44th (in Manhattan) and I walked to 43rd in full costume. I went in and sang and I read and had a little chitchat with all the creatives and that was it. It was less than 20 minutes.

EDGE: In looking at your credits, is this the first transgender role that you’ve done?

Gregory Haney: It was! I have never played a girl.

EDGE: Is La Cienega transitioning woman to man or man to woman?

Gregory Haney: I know in the breakdown of the character before the audition it said transgender woman but I think in the "Bring It On" world she’s just a girl. You don’t ever see her as a boy, she’s not a drag queen...she’s a woman, a girl.

We should all be as lucky!!!!
If you are wondering, I don't think Haney's role was in the original movie.

Making a Transgender Difference in the UK

"Sarah Brown's" expereinces are all too familiar.

In Europe's "Pink News" she talked of being Cambridge's Councillor and the country's only out transgender official.
She said: “I have experienced three types of discrimination – transphobia, homophobia and misogyny”.
“Since the transition to live as female I’m suddenly a second-class citizen. Suddenly my personal space was invaded and I started getting men touching me and being groped on the Tube.
“All this stuff I had not experienced before. I have also had complete strangers coming up asking me questions about my genitals which is completely rude.”
Sound familiar?

"Ms Brown, who ranked 28th on the Independent on Sunday’s Pink List, making her the UK’s most influential trans person, entered into a civil partnership in 2009.
But she had to file for divorce from her then wife, Sylvia Knight, before they could become civil partners after her transition.
“When we were in court in Cambridge getting divorced we had to sort of convince ourselves what we were doing. However we came out holding hands and crying.
“We developed an understanding together and were interested in each other as people.”

Her attitude says it all:
The 53-year-old said: “I want to raise the profile of trans-genders,
lesbians and gays.
“We are pretty marginalised. Society is more accepting of gays than
transgenders. I want to bring people out of the shadows.
“There are 14 and 15-year-olds out there who are scared to be who they
really are because they fear being picked on.
“I’ve been there. I know what it feels like – and attitudes need to change.”
Good "stuff"! Follow the link for more on the story.

Is It A Man's World?

Personally (with my transgender bias set aside), I've felt it is a man's world-but women run it.
I'm sure you've heard the "behind every good man there is a better woman" comment. How true.
The female gender at it finest nutures, loves and makes a male whole.  At the same time, from childhood girls sit back and watch the boys in their own world. Some react with shyness, interaction or even amusement.
Over the past several months I've watched and learned how women interact in their own circle until a man comes enters it. A light goes on and their attention changes  immediately. It's innately what most females do.
I've even experienced the feeling myself during my very limited experience with men. When a woman I knew came close on a night I was with a man, quick exchanges were made.  Eye contact was the primary form of communication. "How's it going?" came through loud and clear with no words spoken and the man none the wiser.
So yes, it was his world and rightfully so because he made me feel comfortable in it. Hopefully, I returned the favor.
A true gender "give and take".  Both worlds came together and life was good. Certainly my dual gender status didn't hurt the process and attempting to understand process from the feminine perspective helped. As I've mentioned before though, I was surprised how natural the process was.
Perhaps I was subconciously making notes in my mind all along.
I realized  the world really does belong to a woman. She is noticed and scrutinized by both genders and her emtional base alone makes her more in tune to the people around her.
I feel the internal changes such as this are more important than outward appearances. It certainly explains partially why I've known men who have gone through the sex reassignment process and....are still men.
Of course the pain of jumping from one gender world has been intense on occasion. Every now and then though, dual membership has it's advantages and makes me a better person. At least that's the goal!

Womanless Beauty Pageant?

The casual observer would certainly not call this a womanless beauty pageant. Perhaps a "womanless at birth" pageant would be a better title.
At any rate this collection of beauties competed recently in Los Angeles.  Here is the winning contestant and you can view a couple more pix are in the "Picture Gallery"
If you weren't in the audience at Circus Disco in Los Angeles on November 6th, it's very likely you weren't aware that Daniela Sanchez, competing as Miss Mexico, became the 38th recipient of the Queen of the Universe crown.

The Other Side Of Transgender Thai

We all see and enjoy the beautiful Thai transgender women in beauty pageants and other public events but what about the "everyday" transsexual Thai woman. The woman who goes to work everyday and just lives her life.

From the "Phuket News" comes a story about the "other side" of the Katoey culture in Thailand.
"Katoey are born, raised and registered in the Kingdom of Thailand. They are, and have been, an integral part of Thai society dating back to at least the Rattanakosin period in the 18th century. However, in the mainstream psyche, katoey are placed on the the fringes of the Thai social fabric.

Loud, aggressive and violent are all stereotypes associated with the transgender community, especially in Patong – a classic case of "one rotten apple spoils the whole barrel".

However, there are "good apples" that have chosen a different path, but not without adversity.
Toedsak "Gai" Kaipraiwan, 30, (pictured on the left) earned a bachelor’s degree from a university in Sakon Nakhon, her home province in Northeastern Thailand (Isarn). "Gai faced many job related obstacles before working as a transgender consultant in a clinic.

"Um at work"

Not all transgenders have struggled with finding the right job.

"Tintinarn "Um" Homroskla is a 23-year-old Phuketian with a degree in business administration from a local vocational college.

"I started working as a cashier at a store in Phuket International Airport as soon as I graduated. I was 18 years old," Um said.

"I had no problem getting the job and I got along fine with my colleagues. Even though there was nothing exciting about my job, it was my plan to start from something small and work my way up.

Um moved from cashier to sales agent at a housing estate to receptionist at a spa and now is the manager of Andaman Power Organization, a local non-governmental organization working directly with the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transsexual (LGBT) community in Phuket."
 
Two great examples of two of many transgendered women in Thailand who have established themselves in lives they were destined to live.
Follow the link above for the full story.

An Interesting Transsexual "Before"

Italian movie star Giuseppe Schisano to change sex and be called 'Vittoria' .

This will be one transition that will be interesting to watch! I'm thinking her eyes and lips will be sexy!