Transgender Acceptance

Sunday was a very busy day, with many different errands to run and people to see.

It was a beautiful sunny fall day, perfect weather for leggings and my powder blue light sweater. Plus, for once in a very long time, I felt healthy with no aches or pains in my foot. Naturally, it made walking so much easier and I did a lot of it.

Before we left, I had a chance to see CBS News Sunday Morning show on the television. One of the show's features was a revisiting of a show five years ago with several transgender kids. It was very well done and I have added a link here if you haven't seen it. I would check it quickly before it goes away.

Then,we started the day by going to a large game/restaurant venue to pick up what turned out to be a very generous donation to this years Cincinnati Witches Ball. The place had just opened so there were very few people around to notice or be noticed.

From there, we headed back across town to attend a memorial for a dear friend who passed recently. His sister was holding the memorial for his partner in a local tea/coffee shop. As Liz headed for the rest room, I was left to negotiate the ordering process. Since I am not really a tea drinker, I opted for a dark roast coffee and ordered Liz her tea. In the midst of a very busy venue, I received extra ordinarily good service I thought and most of it came because I am transgender. We were asked at least three times if everything was OK.

Ironically, I am fairly sure I wasn't the only trans person in the room. I was introduced to the "wife" of an obviously very gay man. I was impressed by how the trans woman could navigate the crowded surroundings in a pair of impossibly high heels. In fact, the shoes, combined with perfect makeup (to me) gave her away. Plus, she refused to make eye contact at all.

Next, it was time to say our sad goodbyes and head to a very busy grocery store for our weekly shopping. Other than dodging mean old people in electric carts, the whole trip was very mundane. People aren't there to notice anyone and the clerks are in "check out and get out" mode.

Our next stop was a fun one. We had a Witches Ball committee meeting at the place we are having the ball next week...one of the bigger local micro breweries. They have a big party room we are renting. The meeting always gives me a chance to sample one or two of the brewery's fall offerings. These days, two are about all I can handle! We were able to sit outside and conduct the meeting and figured out we were still missing a couple items for a gift basket we are setting up an auction for. So, it was time to leave the brewery, another very accepting place and head to a giant specialty beer store and purchase items for the basket.

The beer store is attached to a huge grocery store, so again Liz and I had to walk a long way to even find the beer section. Find it we did and our day was almost over.

As we made our way back home, I had a chance to reflect back on the day and how far I have come in the world as a transgender woman.   

Coming Out Day...Again

I have been out for so long, I don't normally give much thought to the National "Coming Out Day" which was yesterday.

As I have always written about, coming out can be on very many levels. As little as cross dressing and going out on rare occasions when you are safe, all the way to living full time as a transgender woman. Both are equally as important to the overall trans cause.

Through all of this though, I had my own "coming out" experience this morning. With our changing weather and numerous errands to run this morning, I had to go my wardrobe and find an outfit which was comfortable and was designed to blend with the majority of cis women I encounter. I came up with my long sleeved Durango, Colorado railroad shirt, along with a slightly faded pair of leggings with a pair of tennis shoes.

Normally, I am not real impressed with yet another rather mundane outfit but this morning  However, today somehow was different. For once I accepted I had arrived. This was life as I hadn't really planned for but found anyway. 

The coming out process for me went something like this.  I always knew my goal was to blend. Early on I focused on professional women around me. As I progressed though, I decided I loved the "hippie" bohemian styles from my youth. Finally these days I have settled on comfort and whatever style I can afford. I love this part of the year because I can wear my soft sweaters. colorful leggings and boots.

Most importantly, I have reached a point of having confidence in my feminine appearance which accordingly has acted as a deterrent to my gender dysphoria.

Whatever coming out means to you, building confidence could be your best friend. After all, the great majority of us start so far behind cis women applying makeup and having understanding of what outfits are flattering or not. One of the major problems is battling the mirror which always tries to lie to you and going through our teenage years when we are much older. Which leads to the stereotypical mid aged cross dresser in the mall stuffed into a mini skirt and heels.

Rest assured, it is all part of the coming out process. Here's to hoping yours is coming along well too!

Victoria's Secret becomes Inclusive

After years of excluding transgender and plus size models in their stores advertising, Victoria's Secret has finally become more inclusive.

Starting this month, Victoria’s Secret is collaborating with British designer Emily Bendell. See-through bras, lacy panties, bodysuits with sharp geometric lines and garter belts in shades of crimson, black and white can be found at victoriassecret.com and in seven select stores in the U.S. and U.K. as part of the Bluebella collection, Bendell’s brand. 

The collection has a twist — that’s because it fulfills parent company L Brands Inc.’s promise to update its marketing strategy. Transgender model and actress May Simón Lifschitz and plus-size model Ali Tate Cutler, along with Olivia Sang and Laura Rakhman-Kidd, can be seen in advertisements for the collection on the company’s web site and on images inside and outside of the stores carrying the line. These include New York’s flagship along Fifth Avenue and London’s Bond Street store. Another step forward!

Trans model May Simon Lifsschitz