What Came First?

I've been working not so diligently on a "how to" book for guys who want to be girls.
You are right...yet another book? My take on most of the guides I see are that they are written by individuals who were beautiful boys to start with.
They didn't face the same obstacles presenting female as some of us. Different paths exist to arrive at the same goal. My path was different than theirs,,,no surprise.
As I was writing, I started to think of the addiction versus personality argument.  Was my desire to be a girl always as strong as ii is now or was the desire fueled by successes?
 How did I get from the first rush of pulling hose over my legs to the obsessive attention to (girl) detail I have today.
I will never know. In addition I will never know if I was as much girl then as I am now. It is easy to say "yes, I was". Then again, were the times I was called attractive  or "you make a better looking woman" defining moments that pushed me deeper? Each little success made all the failures easier to handle as I started to go out and live female,
The desire to succeed was powerful and the success euphoric. Did the "euphoria" lock me in deeper or was the desire there anyway and I was ignoring it.
Shame on me if I was. All the years of making myself and others around me miserable could have been averted.
I'm guessing but the predilection to be trans was always in me. I was enabled by how I looked but I had the obsession to live trans. In junior high I wanted to be the girl I sat next to.
I have written about my feelings following a couple dates with men. I was surprised on how deep the girl in me went. The experience was more than validating me as a girl.
Some days I feel the journey was worth all the twist and turns. That is what the book describes. Other days, I feel like a fool.
One thing is for certain. The past is the past. The only thing we can do with it is learn and pay forward to help others!

What's all the "Bralalalala" all about?

From her "Bio"...'Bralalalala is a widely acknowledged talented rock singer and songwriter first and foremost. However, the fact she has lived as a transgender/crossdress/TS/TV whatever her whole life has uprooted her from society and family. Bralalalala's wealthy family has refused to see her since she was in college as a result of her beauty harming their eyes. Bralalalala appeared on national television ABC in 2000, termed a "rock star" on ABC's "Moral Court," yet was told "he" had no business to not expect to be faced with discrimination for being trans DESPITE having musical talent galore.'
I found her to be interesting in that I had never heard of her over the years and the "Bralalalala" site reads like a third party Hollywood bio!

Ride the "Transgender Express"

Quite by accident I stumbled upon yet another transgendered blog on the world wide web. "The Transgender Express" . The blog is written by a young transgendered woman named "Annika". Here is a little of her intro:
I’m still in the beginning stages of a long and rewarding process. I
try to avoid looking at too many transition time lines that I find

online. It makes me feel like a child counting down the days until her
next birthday. I can’t fast-forward time — so blogging about my
experiences is much healthier and more productive.

I hope to provide periodic updates on my transition here on
Autostraddle, as well as reflections on how my girlfriend and I are
losing the heteronormative privilege that we had taken for granted for
most of our relationship. I have no idea about what’s to come in the
months ahead, but I do know that I’m no longer filled with dread when
imagining my future. One thing is certain– I won’t be invited to the
annual frat alumni golf tournament this summer.

I particularly  like the term "heteronormative"! The blog is well balanced with experiences and pictures. Check it out!
Cyrsti