Of course by now we have all made it into the year of the force 2013.
The "force was with me" last night most certainly! As my GF said "It was magical"...Thus the title.
Where to start! To begin with, she planned all of this. I'm not talented enough to be the "social director".
The evening actually started early in the afternoon as we made our way into downtown Cincinnati. By the way, she is one of the persons I credit with pushing me over the cliff and enabling me to move forward faster than I imagined in my transgender journey. So surprisingly, many of my ancient fears of being accepted by the public weren't really a factor this time. Her complete acceptance of who I truly am as a transgender woman does instill confidence.
Before we checked in at our hotel, we stopped at an excellent Jewish deli near the hotel for a fabulous Rueben sandwich and some sort of a potato cake. I knew the evening was getting off to a good start when I was referred to as Mam about three times. We ordered our food to go and headed over to the hotel and began a rather lengthy check in process. I'm an impatient person to start with so minutes turned into hours before we jumped into an elevator and headed up to our room on the 28th floor.
We relaxed for an hour, ate our food and started to get ready to head to a performance of the Cincinnati Pops Orchestra. I did my best to do some understated elegance mixed in with a touch of casual comfort. (Do I sound like a fashionista? Ha!) I wore a see through black beaded lose top over a black sleeveless tank top of sorts and black flowing pants-finished with a pair of fancy black flats for comfort and safety on a snowy New Years Eve. I added one of my thrift store purse finds (a very dressy black bag with hanging silver baubles all over it with a long silver chain I added) and a black silver buckled belt I know some of you are thinking "where the hell are the pictures?" If the truth be known neither of us are picture peeps so there aren't any.
The newest "first" of the evening was taking cabs where we were going. Never had tried it as a girl but let's say we seemingly got quick service.
The "Music Hall" in Cincinnati is a flat out beautiful structure with many flat out many beautiful women. My goal of course was just to blend and enjoy and all went very well. No secret glances or little smiles...nothing.
After the performance we headed down to the Ohio River "Banks" area and arrived almost exactly on time to claim our reservation at a big fun brew pub upscale restaurant. On the river. We stopped at the hostess stand and were greeted with "Good Evening Ladies" and were led to our table overlooking the river and the Roebling suspension bridge. Roebling actually designed it and went on to design the Brooklyn Bridge in NYC. The "L" word became the norm (Ladies) and it truly was music to my ears as was the entertaining live band as we counted the final minutes of 2012.
As luck would have it, big large soft snowflakes were falling along with the Ball in Times Square on the big screens. The snow was reflected by the lit up bridge and one of the big double decker paddle boats as it passed slowly by.
2013 was ushered in of course by champagne and sweet kisses at the table. (I briefly wondered what all the other celebrants thought) All too soon the evening began to end as all wonderful things do and we hailed another cab and headed back to the hotel. Seizing an attempt to extend the evening, we were able to squeeze into the hotel lounge for the final drink of the evening.
It was there I really felt the gender differences as two or three guys got into a drunken shoving match. It was close to closing time for them and the hotel security guard and a manager began to just clear the place anyhow. But he came by where we were sitting at the bar and smiled and said you ladies can go ahead and finish your drinks. In one five minute period I was able to separate myself from male behavior and get a bit of preferential treatment for being a girl.
Then, the night was over and we headed up to our room and I was on a positive "Cloud Nine" buzz. Somewhere above even the 28th floor.
Such a night! As I step back into reality off my cloud, I'm going to attempt to figure out all the nuances of the evening and pass it along in another post.
Until then...I love my little cloud!
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Female Impersonator History
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(left) The first Miss Gay America Pageant - Center-Charlie Brown, First Runner Up.Miss Gay America 1971- Norma Kristie (All photos from the private collection of Jerry Peek)
From the Out and About Magazine:
"All across the country people are discovering the art of female impersonation, and drag shows are doing big business in most major US cities and many smaller towns. RuPaul’s Drag Race has brought attention to the art form to the masses, and drag is appealing to a wider variety of audiences than it has in years".
"The Miss Gay America pageant is unique in that all contestants must be biologically male. No transgender performers, and no drag artists taking female hormone therapies or having undergone cosmetic surgeries below the neck are allowed to compete. Long-time pageant owner Norman Jones is acknowledged as the force behind the success of MGA, owned since 2005 by Larry Tyger and Terry Eason, but without its creator, Nashville native Jerry Peek, the respected competition would not exist today."
For more of this drag history piece go here.
Sunday, December 30, 2012
2012 a Transgender Odyssey
As I look back on a very active and exciting year in my gender journey, I thought a time line may be appropriate to attempt to put the year in focus:
New Years Eve 2012...took my first Estrogen and Spiro. HRT begins.
February...Breast changes starting.
March...My private Doctor increased minimum Estro dosage and told me he was changing practices- not good as I was to find out. The VA would not pay for his services.
Skin going through amazing changes. Discovered the value of taking a bath in 10w-30 oil to take care of it. Woman aren't just being girly with all their skin products they are a necessity!
May...VA told me there was no in house specialist to prescribe my meds but they would continue to fill them. That sounds better than it was because I had "hit the wall" with my changes and I wanted more. So, I scheduled another VA therapist appointment to pursue options..which she did and told me the magic word "Patient Advocate". At that point I decided if the system is supposed to take care of my needs, I would fight to get them..
June...I pleaded my case with a "patient advocate".. She was positive I would get the outside treatment! But...
July...estro and spiro running out. Still stuck in the VA bureaucracy. Found out my body had it's own new summertime furnace but experienced the true need (and fun) of short sleeved and sleeveless feminine fashion. Women just aren't showing off. They need all the cooling they can get.
August...New in house VA Endo Doc refused to see me. VA agreed to keep my Meds coming until I could get approved for an outside Doc. Problem was the meds were half what I was taking.
September...outside Doc finally approved.
October...BIG MONTH!
Saw the new Doc and he renewed my older Estro prescription to begin the serious changes again.
My Daughter gave me a birthday gift to get my hair colored and done at her hair salon. Quite possibly the biggest change to my girl self outside of starting HRT.
Last but not least, went on a mini 4 day trip with a girlfriend- all as a woman.
November...rediscovered the pleasure of doing drag again in a gay bar as a transgender woman. It was truly fun. Met two new friends whom I still chat with and see.
Went to benefit AIDS drag show with my daughter and 6 of her girlfriends...as a girl for the first time ever.
December..
Whew! I found out why women are always cold. My furnace broke down when I needed it!
The month came and went with me butching it up and having a great time at my family's get together knowing full well most of them know my "secret".
New Years Eve...heading out with my friend who started it all with me last year and planning a great evening.
Finally, 2012 was an incredible year. From my old friends to my new ones, I have much to be grateful for.
Perhaps a statement I heard many times from all my genetic girlfriends rings true: "Welcome to our world!"
I am!
Again, thanks so much for being along for this fantastic ride in Cyrsti's Condo. There is no way I could have ever imagined arriving here.
All the best to All of you in 2013!!!
Cyrsti
New Years Eve 2012...took my first Estrogen and Spiro. HRT begins.
February...Breast changes starting.
March...My private Doctor increased minimum Estro dosage and told me he was changing practices- not good as I was to find out. The VA would not pay for his services.
Skin going through amazing changes. Discovered the value of taking a bath in 10w-30 oil to take care of it. Woman aren't just being girly with all their skin products they are a necessity!
May...VA told me there was no in house specialist to prescribe my meds but they would continue to fill them. That sounds better than it was because I had "hit the wall" with my changes and I wanted more. So, I scheduled another VA therapist appointment to pursue options..which she did and told me the magic word "Patient Advocate". At that point I decided if the system is supposed to take care of my needs, I would fight to get them..
June...I pleaded my case with a "patient advocate".. She was positive I would get the outside treatment! But...
July...estro and spiro running out. Still stuck in the VA bureaucracy. Found out my body had it's own new summertime furnace but experienced the true need (and fun) of short sleeved and sleeveless feminine fashion. Women just aren't showing off. They need all the cooling they can get.
August...New in house VA Endo Doc refused to see me. VA agreed to keep my Meds coming until I could get approved for an outside Doc. Problem was the meds were half what I was taking.
September...outside Doc finally approved.
October...BIG MONTH!
Saw the new Doc and he renewed my older Estro prescription to begin the serious changes again.
My Daughter gave me a birthday gift to get my hair colored and done at her hair salon. Quite possibly the biggest change to my girl self outside of starting HRT.
Last but not least, went on a mini 4 day trip with a girlfriend- all as a woman.
November...rediscovered the pleasure of doing drag again in a gay bar as a transgender woman. It was truly fun. Met two new friends whom I still chat with and see.
Went to benefit AIDS drag show with my daughter and 6 of her girlfriends...as a girl for the first time ever.
December..
Whew! I found out why women are always cold. My furnace broke down when I needed it!
The month came and went with me butching it up and having a great time at my family's get together knowing full well most of them know my "secret".
New Years Eve...heading out with my friend who started it all with me last year and planning a great evening.
Finally, 2012 was an incredible year. From my old friends to my new ones, I have much to be grateful for.
Perhaps a statement I heard many times from all my genetic girlfriends rings true: "Welcome to our world!"
I am!
Again, thanks so much for being along for this fantastic ride in Cyrsti's Condo. There is no way I could have ever imagined arriving here.
All the best to All of you in 2013!!!
Cyrsti
Before Transgender?
As you all know, some of us who have been on this planet for awhile grew up in the information dark ages and what I called the gender "black out".
I found this story from The New York Times Magazine about Ethel Person by Stephen Burt.
" In the 1970s, she one of the first mental-health researchers who tried to meet cross-dressers, transsexuals and (as we now say) transgender people on our own turf, or on our own terms. She visited cross-dressing societies and drag-queen balls; she interviewed all the transsexual patients of the celebrated Dr. Harry Benjamin, and she drew on those visits, those interviews and on hard-to-find publications, including porn. At once a sexologist in the tradition of Alfred C. Kinsey, a psychoanalyst in the tradition of Freud and a writer sympathetic to feminist critique who knew a sexist culture could change, Person asked how we come to see ourselves as men or women, gay or straight or neither, and how to help people whose sense of self causes them pain."
To out this in perspective, I was close to graduating college in 1971. Here's another excerpt:
Person's results make unsettling reading." In papers like “The Transsexual Syndrome in Males” (1974) and “Homosexual Cross-Dressers” (1984), Person and her collaborator, Dr. Lionel Ovesey, distinguished “core gender identity” (whether we think we are truly men or women) from “gender-role identity” (whether we act macho or demure, no-nonsense or girlie-girl) and both from sexual-object choice. Those distinctions can seem obvious now, but they had to be explained at length back then, when those explanations — for psychoanalytic thinkers like Person — often led to broad claims about unconscious origins."
For all of us who lived through this era, this is a good short read. For those that didn't this is a great look at a few of the processes which have opened transgender information doors today. Follow this link.
I found this story from The New York Times Magazine about Ethel Person by Stephen Burt.
" In the 1970s, she one of the first mental-health researchers who tried to meet cross-dressers, transsexuals and (as we now say) transgender people on our own turf, or on our own terms. She visited cross-dressing societies and drag-queen balls; she interviewed all the transsexual patients of the celebrated Dr. Harry Benjamin, and she drew on those visits, those interviews and on hard-to-find publications, including porn. At once a sexologist in the tradition of Alfred C. Kinsey, a psychoanalyst in the tradition of Freud and a writer sympathetic to feminist critique who knew a sexist culture could change, Person asked how we come to see ourselves as men or women, gay or straight or neither, and how to help people whose sense of self causes them pain."
To out this in perspective, I was close to graduating college in 1971. Here's another excerpt:
Person's results make unsettling reading." In papers like “The Transsexual Syndrome in Males” (1974) and “Homosexual Cross-Dressers” (1984), Person and her collaborator, Dr. Lionel Ovesey, distinguished “core gender identity” (whether we think we are truly men or women) from “gender-role identity” (whether we act macho or demure, no-nonsense or girlie-girl) and both from sexual-object choice. Those distinctions can seem obvious now, but they had to be explained at length back then, when those explanations — for psychoanalytic thinkers like Person — often led to broad claims about unconscious origins."
For all of us who lived through this era, this is a good short read. For those that didn't this is a great look at a few of the processes which have opened transgender information doors today. Follow this link.
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Star Gazing
As 2012 rushes to a close, the site where I follow my own Libra "Horror Scope" every week or so runs an Astro Guide for the coming year. I curled up in my fuzzy "Jammie's" with a tasty cup of Hot Chocolate and gave it a read!
The segments were broken down into Love, Madness and Obsession:
"Love" turned out to be a little spooky, prophetic and motivational. Here's an excerpt:
" You may feel a great sense of relief when it comes to where you have been and where you want to go, as the life you lead now will greatly reflect how you have spent your time and knowing if it was done wisely. If all has been going well, time to enjoy what you’ve earned and peacefully be in the moment. If you not, then try out new methods to get where you want. Don’t worry, what one person needs a few years to do, you can do in one — but there is no time to waste, as your time is now!" So true!!!!!
"Madness" on the other hand describes my weakness's exactly:
"Money will be pouring in and out (mostly out) but don’t lose focus. You must make investments into your beliefs, which will cause you to feel uneasy, but ride it out. Big bets need to be made and the only way is through effort and sacrifice. This will mean being more thorough than ever, which will call for skills that you haven’t used in a while, but will become old hat if you keep at it. Start with making sure to dot all your i’s and cross all your t’s and do not wait for others to give you approval. You’ll get the hang of it all in no time. Just be willing to sweat it out, as extraordinary results can only come from your extraordinary actions."
Finally"Obsession" says I'm going to feel like I'm 16 again, which I can't even remember plus a couple other interesting observations:
"Your brain is going to turn into a sponge, absorbing the world around you voraciously. It’ll make you feel as if you’re 16 again, with a sense of wonder filling you. While it’ll be great to work off this energy, it can be a bit tricky to keep your discipline in terms of following a linear path. So, be aware of building your story layer by layer now, sequentially. Enough with fragmenting it all together and then trying to think of a way to make it sound all good, when you know it’s not. It’s okay to admit to yourself when you have to take control with more aggression and show your teeth. Yes, some will call you a bully, but whatever, this is your time to shine and turn out your best work. If anything, those onlookers should thank you, as this year, you’ll be putting on one hell of a show."
Truthfully, I've always taken Astrology with a grain of salt. I love to pass it along here in Cyrsti's Condo for amusement purposes for all of us. I don't know if it my transgender lifestyle or what but quite a few of the signs fit me to a "T" (no pun intended).
At any rate, if 2013 comes close to 2012, the year will be one hell of a ride- if not a show!
Before I forget. Here's your link for an Astro Guide from theFrisky.
The segments were broken down into Love, Madness and Obsession:
"Love" turned out to be a little spooky, prophetic and motivational. Here's an excerpt:
" You may feel a great sense of relief when it comes to where you have been and where you want to go, as the life you lead now will greatly reflect how you have spent your time and knowing if it was done wisely. If all has been going well, time to enjoy what you’ve earned and peacefully be in the moment. If you not, then try out new methods to get where you want. Don’t worry, what one person needs a few years to do, you can do in one — but there is no time to waste, as your time is now!" So true!!!!!
"Madness" on the other hand describes my weakness's exactly:
"Money will be pouring in and out (mostly out) but don’t lose focus. You must make investments into your beliefs, which will cause you to feel uneasy, but ride it out. Big bets need to be made and the only way is through effort and sacrifice. This will mean being more thorough than ever, which will call for skills that you haven’t used in a while, but will become old hat if you keep at it. Start with making sure to dot all your i’s and cross all your t’s and do not wait for others to give you approval. You’ll get the hang of it all in no time. Just be willing to sweat it out, as extraordinary results can only come from your extraordinary actions."Finally"Obsession" says I'm going to feel like I'm 16 again, which I can't even remember plus a couple other interesting observations:
"Your brain is going to turn into a sponge, absorbing the world around you voraciously. It’ll make you feel as if you’re 16 again, with a sense of wonder filling you. While it’ll be great to work off this energy, it can be a bit tricky to keep your discipline in terms of following a linear path. So, be aware of building your story layer by layer now, sequentially. Enough with fragmenting it all together and then trying to think of a way to make it sound all good, when you know it’s not. It’s okay to admit to yourself when you have to take control with more aggression and show your teeth. Yes, some will call you a bully, but whatever, this is your time to shine and turn out your best work. If anything, those onlookers should thank you, as this year, you’ll be putting on one hell of a show."
Truthfully, I've always taken Astrology with a grain of salt. I love to pass it along here in Cyrsti's Condo for amusement purposes for all of us. I don't know if it my transgender lifestyle or what but quite a few of the signs fit me to a "T" (no pun intended).
At any rate, if 2013 comes close to 2012, the year will be one hell of a ride- if not a show!
Before I forget. Here's your link for an Astro Guide from theFrisky.
Skip the Makeup
It is true I don't use as much as I did these days but that is not the reason for this post. I happened across a blog about transgender transsexual models called Skip the Makeup which seems to be a little outdated. Andrej Pejic is not even mentioned for example.
I did however find the blog interesting as it featured a few of the other models who were outed and lost their jobs years ago such as Tracy Norman (left) and Lauren Foster (below).
Here is a link for more.
Akhiro Miwa
Black Lizard (Kuro tokage) (1969) [Black Lizard]: Playing a female role, "she" commits suicide by taking poison rather than be arrested; "she" dies in Isao Kimura's arms shortly afterwards. Black Rose Mansion (Kuro bara no yakata; Black Rose) (1969) [Ryuko]: Again playing a female role, "she" is drowned, along with Masakazu Tamura, when their motorboat collides with another boat.
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Welcome to Reality
Out with my girls. Liz on left, Andrea on right. I worked very hard to get to the point where I could live as a transgender woman. Once I b...
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Amateur, by my definition means a person who does not seriously pursue a certain interest, job or hobby. Ever sense Cyrsti's Condo ...
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I don't find many new womanless pageant pictures floating around the web anymore. I think it's primarily due to the fact that th...
