Riding the Storm

Yesterday was one of those long days. I seemingly had something going on every hour on the hour.

First of all I had to make the hour trip to the Dayton/Springfield, Ohio area to take care of two VA appointments and do some much needed lawn work on my property.

I have a tendency to want to dress up a little bit more to go to my VA doctor appointments but simply couldn't with the work I had to do, so I had to let my makeup, hair etc carry the day.

It probably doesn't matter much except with my therapist who will mention my appearance, except to me of course and the confidence looking my best gives me.

Yesterday, outside of accomplishing what I wanted to do at the property, my stop at the VA hospital's coffee shop proved to be the most interesting. It seems, I have reached rock star status with the two women who run the shop on a regular basis. They always know my name and ask where have I been? Not wanting to be a total smart arse, I don't say roaming a hospital is not my fave sort of recreation! So I just said the truth, most of my appointments are built around Mental Health. The reason being is the Veterans Administration (while providing HRT transgender help) still channels all of it through Mental Health with an assist of an endocrinologist.

Without outing myself as transgender or bi-polar, I simply told them I was crazy, which for some reason they were entertained by. I must point out, there were no other patrons in line for all of this fun and games. Most importantly though, both of them didn't miss a beat with my pronoun usage. I was subjected to a liberal dose of "she and her" through the whole duration.

After finally getting my coffee, it was off to trans vet support group meeting time.

Nothing of real note happened there except a discussion of how difficult it was for some LGBT folks around the holidays who have been rejected by their families. In our small group, one transgender woman fits that mold and normally shares Thanksgiving dinner with a local LGBT group.

With that, the day was nearly over except for a "survival of the fittest" drive home through Dayton/Cincinnati rush hour traffic.

I am glad the day is over!

YAY! UPS!

Connie sent in this comment:

1. "Well, I dusted off my old hiking boots and laced them up this morning. Not that I was planning on hiking, mind you. It just so happens that, yesterday, I learned I will soon have a reason to wear them. So, I figured I should get used to them now.
   
   The boots are a requirement for the job I interviewed for yesterday. I hate the look of them, but I'm probably going to hate more the brown uniform I will be issued on Wednesday. No, I'm not joining the US Army, but I will be working for UPS - at least through the holidays. There is nothing glamorous about delivering packages, but this doesn't really bother me at all. I'm confident that my femininity will shine through!
   
   I have to say that the interview was nothing short of amazing. This is but the second corporation that has even granted me an interview (the other was Kroger) from my application and resume. Within the first ten minutes, the young man from HR told me that I was just the kind of person they were looking for, and that he was going to put me through to orientation next week. Really? I'm 66-years-old, partially disabled, and (in case it wasn't apparent) a trans woman. The interview continued for another half-hour, and I asked about possible promotion opportunities. He told me that he felt I was already qualified for some supervisory positions, and that he was willing to recommend me for one right away. Then, he detailed the special program UPS has for advancing women in the company. I told him that I was interested, but I would still like to "start at the bottom," if only to prove to myself that I can do the work (it's going to be a physical test, for sure). One of the male privileges I had in my youth was to play competitive sports. I learned to push myself to the limits, and to enjoy the process. It never made me feel like a real man, but it did feed my ego to know that I could overcome the odds. In fact, I must say that my whole transition has benefited from this attitude. And I know that, in the end, I will still be a woman - a stronger woman. It's not the lacing of the boots, nor is it the lace of my panties, that make me who I am. It's also great to know that somebody else saw who I was and is willing to give me the chance to show it.
   
   Now, this is a great place for my joke: What's the difference between UPS and SRS? With SRS, nobody complains about a lost package! :-)"

Congratulations! :) Always good to hear about employment for a transgender woman friend! (Or just a woman friend!)

What an uplifting letter as in "up-lifting" packages :).

Such a Week!

It was quite a week for the  LGBT community. In all, eight transgender candidates were elected including trans man Phillipe Cunningham in Minneapolis. Plus, in Canada a trans woman was elected mayor of a town.

Also, Frump's ban on transgender troops was shot down in another court.

In the past though, for every step forward we take, seemingly something else comes along to push back on us.

Jenner showing off her baby? bump?

As long as we keep taking giant steps though, the push back gets weaker and weaker.

Perhaps all the news about cis women everywhere being molested has helped push us to the back of t the headlines. Something trans women know all too well.

Supposedly, even
Caitlyn Jenner has finally renounced her support for Frump (the lead molester) as I imagine almost all transgender women will!

Getting Dressed to Shoes

Liz is a huge fan of the Marla Cilley book, Sink Reflections. One of the chapters I am going to very loosely paraphrase is called "Getting Dressed to Shoes."

In it, the author goes into some detail of how the slightest detail of being a woman can make or break your day and/or demeanor. She says it can be anything from sexy lingerie, a string of pearls all the way to your fave fragrance.

But, she insists your shoes should at the least be something you have to lace up.

I know by now you are thinking, what does all of this have to do with me? I know several transgender women who wouldn't be caught dead without their heels, all the way to those who feel dead in them. I also know closeted trans or cross dressers who don't feel dressed without the feel of silky panties under their very male work clothes.

I found it extremely interesting how this cis-woman author described all of this.

Years ago, Liz asked me what kind of woman would I become (as far as feminine upkeep goes.) As you Cyrsti's Condo regulars know, I am mainly very casual but...if I know I am going out (even for a walk) I need to add some foundation and eye makeup. Plus I have the constant reminder of my hair and breasts to reinforce some inner femininity.

Obviously, it is to each their own, I also know several cis-women who spend quite a bit of time (at least an hour) to insure their hair and makeup is ready for public consumption...as well as trans women.

Indeed transgender or cross dressing variety is the spice of life and don't forget to lace up those shoes!

Saluting All Veterans

Being a transgender veteran myself, I would be remiss in not mentioning all transgender veterans. Including current or veteran serving/or served in the Armed Forces of the United States. When you consider the percentages of trans vets, you can not think about all of those who went before us who silently took their secret to the grave.

Plus, these days we (trans people) still find ourselves fighting for our rights to even fight for our country thanks to the current administration. Seemingly, though, those efforts have been derailed in the court system.

Transgender or not, thanks for your sacrifice.

Passages

As I continue to put together a possible workshop title for the Trans Ohio Symposium this Spring, I dredge up old memories and wonder why I went down certain paths.

One major one revolved the fact I had the penchant for certain people seeing me both ways, as a man and as a cross dressed woman.

As we all know, time makes for an excellent filter. Good or bad, we have a chance to re-live and wonder about the past.

One word which keeps appearing in my past is validation and my earliest senses of being validated as a cross dressed woman came from Halloween parties. In fact, it took me years to realize when somebody complimented me it was "You look good as a woman...for a man."  Somehow I finally realized the difference between reality, pictures and the mirror.

Summer Picture

I was missing the key element of feeling comfortable in my own skin which finally led to a confidence I had never known as a transgender woman. Plus the biggest key to it all was the ability for me to grow my own hair. (Yours may be different of course.)

Passages for all of us transgender women are easy to over simplify, which I think leads to the infamous "I'm more trans than you debacle."

One way or another, the journey never seems to totally end, it just gets easier with time...most of the time.

Who Was That Woman...Part Two

We continue to receive the occasional comment concerning our Cyrsti's Condo past post, called "Who Was that Woman."

Cutting to the chase, I wrote about the brief glimpse I saw of myself in a restroom mirror. Instead of recoiling in horror, I made the quick gender judgement of "woman." (Without thinking)

One comment in particular made me feel so good, because it comes from a cis woman friend I have known for years and used to chill out with occasionally. Aimee wrote:

"I am so happy for you! I think that you could give me some lessons on female self-confidence. And I think THAT is fantastic! "

Little do you know Aimee, I got plenty of lessons from you :).

I am adding a couple more comments which seem to fit:

As Connie always has said, "Your best fashion accessory is a smile!" and as Paula Goodwin said:

I'm a little behind you on the HRT Route ~ well quite a bit actually, but the changes to how I look to others is already quite dramatic, my latest joy is having the confidence in appearance to go out without makeup."

How ironic is it we go to all this trouble to discover less is truly more in the makeup department.

More Victories

As we celebrated the political victories yesterday of Danica Roem in Virginia and Andrea Jenkins in Minneapolis, we neglected to mention four other transgender winning candidates across the country:

Tyler Titus, Erie Pa. School Board
Lisa Middleton, Palm Springs Ca. City Council
Stephe Koontz, Doraville, Ga. City Council
and
Gerri Cannon, NH. School Board

It seems some of these victories had their basis with the help and guidance of the LGBT "Victory Institute" and it's "Victory Fund."

Now comes the hard part for all of these winners, fulfilling the promises they made during the election process.

These days, a very jaded and restless populace is tired of waiting on the screwed up mess upper level politicians have made of our government to be fixed.

As you probably noted from the list, most of these winners are on the very grass root level of government. Where change needs to start!

The Transgender Glass Ceiling Came Crashing Down!

Last night was a big breakthrough evening for transgender women and trans men everywhere, thanks to several mid term election victories.

Details from the Washington Blade: LAKE RIDGE, Va. —" Danica Roem on Tuesday soundly defeated Virginia state Del. Bob Marshall (R-Prince William County) in a race that garnered national attention.

With 100 percent of precincts in the 13th District reporting, Roem defeated Marshall by a 54-45 percent margin.

Roem, a former journalist, will become the first openly transgender person seated in any state legislature in the country once she is sworn into the Virginia House of Delegates in January.

Althea Garrison in 1992 became the first trans person elected to a state legislature in the U.S. when she won a seat in the Massachusetts House of Representatives, but she did not publicly discuss her gender identity during the campaign. Stacie Laughton in 2012 became the first openly trans person elected to a state legislature when she won a seat in the New Hampshire House of Representatives, but she later ended her bid to sit in the chamber after convictions for credit card and identity fraud became public.

Andrea Jenkins, who is a trans woman of color, on Tuesday was elected to the Minneapolis City Council."

Jenkin's (who I have had the pleasure to see speak) Is a very accomplished author, play wright and activst.  Jenkins most recently was awarded a Bush Fellowship as well as a Fellowship in the Cultural Community Leadership Institute at Intermedia Arts and was named a fellow in the Many Voices Fellowship at the Playwrights Center, according to the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund.

What a night! Follow the links for more.