Saturday, June 6, 2015

Advanced Training?

I picked this up through Stana's Femulate blog and similar to so many other excellent posts I see from her, this one really resonated with me. It was actually posted by Monica:

"I recently went to SF and then on to Denver to go to Art of Feminine Presence (AFP) Training.

This was my fourth time going to AFP. I am still amazed that our community has not taken to this; it really is the best way I have found for getting in touch with my feminine essence.

My companion for the training was my friend and well known voice coach Kathe Perez

I was surrounded for six days by loving caring and sympathetic cisgender woman who treated me as one of their own.

I have a theory, if you want to learn Japanese, you do not go to Japan and hang around with Americans. Similarly, if you want to get in touch with you feminine essence, hanging around with cisgender women is likely to be more productive than hanging around with transwomen. I am just saying! Get outside your comfort zone and you will be amazed at what you can achieve and learn!"


This post resonated with me for several reasons. First, I went through similar trials and tribulations as I was coming out of the closet. Unlike Monica, I couldn't find any trans women to hang out with if I wanted to. There were plenty of what I call "predators in dresses" but no true trans women.  Similar to Monica, I began to hang out with nothing but cis women who consistently accepted me and pushed me out of my comfort zone. In fact they flat out tossed me off a gender cliff.  I too was amazed on what I did (and have) achieved and what the future holds.

I love the line "I have a theory, if you want to learn Japanese, you do not go to Japan and hang around with Americans." I do think if you are going though, I think it is impossible not to bring some of your male past with you to spice your feminine essence!

Trans*forming The Dialogue Goes Live!

if your memory is even slightly better than mine, you may remember before the Caitlin Jenner binge-Cyrsti's Condo was chosen as one of the "gateway" blogs (by Simmons College) . Here you go:


Trans_forming the Dialogue_FB_coverSocialWork@Simmons is proud to announce the launch of: Trans*forming the Dialogue! In honor of LGBT Pride Month External link and in an effort to continue to celebrate Simmons’ College commitment to fostering inclusivity and social advocacy, we are excited to promote this powerful message. We invite you to participate in our campaign and ensure that your voice is heard!

Follow the link above for more right now and most certainly we will have more to come from our end! 

This evening I did leave a comment praising the timing of Simmons' blog because I believe the Jenner "outing" is giving too much "warm and fuzzies" and not enough "reality" of the trans experience.

Friday, June 5, 2015

Transgender Troops-More than Fighting the Enemy

In a "thank-goodness" moment, more transgender news has surfaced other than Caitlin Jenner.

It's estimated over 15,000 transgender troops serve in the U.S. Military.  But even though transgender people are twice as likely to serve in the military as their fellow citizens, current policy prohibits them from serving as openly transgender.
Today I picked up this story from Yahoo Health:

Transgender couple Logan and Laila are fighting to serve openly in the military. (NYT on Yahoo)"Transgender Troops: At War, in Love, and Fighting to Serve Openly- by Molly Shea. "


Above you can see a transgender couple currently serving in the military. ( Logan and Laila) For more of the story and a video go here.

Potty "Jabber"

Last night I was out with a friend I hadn't seen for quite a while. As we watched the Cleveland/Warrior NBA game and enjoyed a couple adult beverages-I overheard this example of why the genders may not be that far apart when it comes to restroom usage.

From my stall, I heard two women I presume to be 20 somethings having a very animated conversation concerning the need to wash their hands-only when and if they peed on them.

So much for yet another "pristine" women's restroom stereotype.

Thursday, June 4, 2015

"Market Penetration?"

Yesterday marked another visit to my endocrinologist at the Veterans Administration Hospital in Dayton, Ohio. To catch some of you up, I am a Vietnam era trans veteran under VA health care-including HRT.

Normally, the journey through the hospital to get to the Doc's is normally an adventure.If you ever have the opportunity to visit a VA medical facility, you will immediately see how tough the Veteran's Administration has it.

Anyway you look at it (or me) I always stand out as a trans woman. The good news is the greatest majority of people have stepped up to make me feel welcome, even when I was petrified. This visit though, I wasn't so much petrified and became even less so when I picked up one of the local free newspapers at the door-to read as I waited. I was dazzled when I saw the headline "If the Shoe Fits-Transgender Lives in the Miami Valley." (here) Fortunately, I was "rocked" through my visit and never had a chance to read it at the hospital.

Then-when I made it to the Doc's office, he had a very quiet and seemingly bored resident doc with him. We talked about the usual, breast development ect and could the resident examine my breasts? As I thought back to some of my Army pre draft physicals I thought sure!!! Actually, he explained to us, there is a real tissue difference in "moobs' (man boobs) and what a transgender woman develops.

Ever so briefly, the Doc mentioned I did trans workshops. Surprisingly, the resident woke right up and said something about Laverne Cox and Caitlin Jenner. 

Wow!!! I was impressed I encountered so much publicity yesterday. This being "trendy" is at the least interesting. Sometimes I compare it with my "fast food" experiences back in the day. I would pick up the trash around my parking lot and judge some of the competitor's market penetration from the number of their empty cups on my lot or in my trash.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Cyrsti's Condo "From the Heart"


Do Pictures Really Tell a Thousand Words?

The worst that can come out of the Caitlin Jenner blow out is if how many people's first thought is "Wow! She is gorgeous."

Very few pause to think Jenner had/has the benefit of the very best of the Hollywood glamour mill.

Then, even more "civilians" are not aware how precious "passing privilege" is to most of us. We just don't have the resources to jump in and do what Jenner did.

How Caitlin Jenner can be an Olympic star again is-is to never let the world know how difficult the rest of the transgender world has it. Certainly, she doesn't have to worry about which rest room she uses only for being trans. Her celeb status will take care of that.

Caitlin will have to remember her roots-no much how coloring she uses. If she doesn't-most of of this hoopla will remain just that-hoopla.

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Spindled and Mutilated?

As I have written in a previous post about our Trans Ohio Symposium weekend, the impact of ally's this year was the biggest surprise to me.  Of course the cynical side of me thought "well they only came to see the freaks in the zoo." Again, of course-none of that was true.

I believe many did/do wonder what does make a transgender person "tick." I can tell you I have never had that many strangers reach out to me with a mixture of kindness and sympathy which truthfully made me feel a bit guilty. After all, I have pretty much come to terms of what living a transgender life means to me. Selfishly I thought, where the hell were you when I needed all of you??

 In truth though, we all know where I was-in the closet. Just like all the trans women MIA (Missing in Action) from the weekend. The trans woman turnout was close to tragic. More than likely five or less of my age, five younger and fewer yet trans women of color. (Last year, they formed the biggest group.)

In my opinion there are several reasons. The younger the participant this year, the more gender "labels" they could and did use on themselves. The future is bright. On the other end, I met two "Jacks who became Jill's" and became giant "Jackasses." Finally, there are the stealth dwellers who don't see the need to attend for any number of reasons. Maybe they have another closet to come out of these days or like the "Jackasses" I met-don't give a horse's rear.

To be sure, many deep questions still to be answered. In a couple weeks or so, the Symposium "powers to be" will be sending out survey's. Of course I already have a few suggestions to address broader questions in at least areas which effect trans women-if any more show up next year. Then again, more might with a bigger agenda. Plus, those of you who have ever dealt with a volunteer organization, the rule of thumb is "That's a great idea! YOU do it!"

I also think it is tough because the Trans Ohio Symposium does not do double duty as a "get away" weekend for questioning cross dressers seeking to explore their feminine sides. No organized drag shows or "pub crawls" are part of the weekend.  What you see is what you get-knowledge.

The good thing this year was again I learned much more than I ever even thought I knew.

The picture above is yet another "attempt" at a better than average picture from either of our camera phones. The guy to my right is Lachlan a transman. I think we all know by now pictures are not my forte anyhow! Lachlan was delightful as we registered attendees on Friday.

Giving Credit Where Credit is Due?

brad-dacus- ira hansenOne of the potential problems I see coming out of the HUGE Caitlin Jenner coming out is all of the sudden she will get credit for the transgender advances many people have worked very hard to achieve. Here's a prime example from the LEXIE CANNES STATE OF TRANS — 

UPDATE-3 June 2, 2015. According to blogger Monica Roberts, Texas’ various anti-trans bills, including “bathroom bills” have failed to become law following the end of the Texas legislative session. This means “bathroom bills” in all 5 states have failed. Follow the link above for more.

Another very pleasant departure from the recent Jenner hoopla last night was NOT hearing or seeing any jabbering from Zoey Tur on anything I watched. Instead I saw the very credible and experienced trans woman Eden Lane.

Eden Lane
 The transgender community desperately needs to seize the "Jenner/Gender" moment with quality trans women journalists such as Eden Lane-not one who fell on their head out of a helicopter like Zoey Tur.

What Would Mom Say

Image from Jenna Norman on UnSplash This week my question to answer on the year long bio I am writing for my daughter and family as well as ...