Now I Understand you "Stealth" Folks!

I have read and even conversed with transgendered or transsexual women who have gone "stealth". OK, let me clarify some had transitioned with the operation and some had not had the operation but lived in society as females. They made no secret of the fact they wanted nothing to do with the "crazies" in our culture.
I took that as a sign of weakness. How could they not want to help in making life easier for the transgendered generations to come????
Well, the last couple of months on this blog have given me a real insight to where they are coming from and I apologize for my ignorance.
What changed? To be blunt about it, yet again recently I was told I was less of a person and shouldn't be allowed to live my life in my chosen gender. Get back in my closet and quit embarrassing the chosen ones who were willing and able to go the distance to Thailand.
Was this coming from some right wing, bible quoting bigot? Hell no, it was coming from right wing bible thumping transsexual Nazi's! Really!
Now I know why the lady down the street goes about her life quietly without ever having the mystical operation to take her to the official promised land. Wow I was thick!!!
Why would she want any part of this circus?
Why do I? Because I need to be committed! (I know there is a rubber room reservation waiting for me!) Seriously, I'm committed to helping anyone who can learn from my story. My failures and successes are out here to benefit others that's it. I won't do it any other way because it's my life and the positive karma I've enjoyed lately dictates I do it this way.
So here is my apology to all you stealth transgendered men and women. I understand where you are coming from now.
Ironically,  probably like you I have had more vicious attacks on my lifestyle from within rather from outside our culture.

Yet Another "Here We Go Again!"

Anne sent in another thought provoking comment. I started to respond directly to it but then decided I needed to do a little more.
Here's the comment:

"I am wondering how you feel about the distinction between being trans-gender, ie "presenting" as the gender opposite to that matching the sexual characteristics with which you were born....and,

being trans-sexual, ie going through that extremely difficult process of changing those physical characteristics to match the brain sex with which you were born.

You see if you do see the distinction and can accept that HUGE difference then perhaps you can see why organizations like MUC must exclude the transgendered from those contests designed for women.

If you cannot make that distinction or simply refuse to accept it, then you contribute to the push back against that preposterous claim that "presenting" female actually makes one female and will continue to cause problems for young women like Jenna."

First of all, I believe sex and gender are different. Let's make that distinction. I don't feel the transsexual elitists are any better than the narrow minded red neck sitting at the end of the bar in their thought patterns. Let's use the quote of the day I just posted and change it to "You aren't a woman. You are an operation." I don't care what equipment you carry. I'm a libertarian. Spend your life on this planet the best way you know how. That includes gender.

Secondly, I know a few vocal transsexual elitists feel their "extremely difficult" process was somehow more difficult than any other of us mere transgendered folks or cross dressers. I agree their process was more painful and expensive but that is it. I see it as an effort to transfer the "male privilege" they experienced to a "transsexual privilege" they think they deserve.

I do not think MUC should be forced to take Jenna but I do believe in her right to force the issue. It seems to me you are contradicting yourself at this point.  MUC is most certainly is pushing back at our entire culture no matter how we identify. How can you begin to say this is the fault of the transgendered culture? You didn't say a word about how wrong it was for Jenna to be rejected. Really?

Finally, let me use your push back phrase.
As I started to live my life in my chosen gender, the biggest push back I experienced was from the transsexual elitists I have encountered on line.
Dare I say some have bordered on the jealous and bitter side? For the life of me, I don't know why Anne? I'm just another human trying to live life the best I can. Does it make it wrong that I am accepted in the places I go as a trans person? Some trans-nazi's seem to think it is.
Let's use you as an example. If you are in a restaurant near me and you are an attractive transsexual operated woman, you have a couple choices. If indeed you notice me at all, you could stay stealth and say nothing or whisper to the people you are with (throwing me under the bus for your own perceived superiority) or try to say something to me.
Let me follow this point up with another. Compare appearance with all the expensive operations in the world.  I  have certainly seen more than a couple transsexual women who just don't make the female grade. At that point do they keep their female privilege card to use the restroom because of all the money they spent? What about the female to male transgendered folks? Do they contribute to the push back too?

I will say it again and again Anne.  I do my best to "push forward" in my life and in anyway possible help others who may be on the same path.  I do not believe you can spend your way into becoming a woman and I'm sure Jenna feels the same way although I can't speak for her.
I believe it would be Jenna who would use the "preposterous" word to think transgendered women hurt her chances to be accepted in the pageant.

Oh, by the way. I'm only presenting as me. Until science evolves to a point a trans woman can birth a child we are all the same.  As a friend once told me "Beware, all the operations and hormones in the world do not often make a man a woman."

***I'm sure some of you may want to comment on this pro or con. If the blog system would let you in, you can send a comment to my email cyrstih@yahoo.com and I will transfer it here.

Quote of the Day

"You are not a woman. You are a career."
From the 195s film "The Star". Spoken to Bette Davis by Sterling Hayden.

Transgendered Stars Shine Brite!

As Glaad wrapped up their recent media awards show, I almost blew up my computer downloading pix of transgendered stars.
I'm going to try to spread them out here, the Gallery page in the Condo and the rest on "Trannsnation".
Here are just a couple!
 Dr. Marcy Bowers of course is the renowned transsexual surgeon (transgendered herself).
"Manila and Sahara" are from RuPaul's "Drag Race".

Finally I added an appropriate  photo of Ru himself (looking like some sort of an 1950's Havana reject)

"Manila Luzon & Sahara Davenport"

 

"Marcy Bowers"

Yet Another Transgender Rejection

If you are active at all on line and/or from Canada, you probably know Jenna Talackova, a Vancouver native was disqualified from Miss Universe Canada.  Denis Davila, the national director of Miss Universe Canada, told the Toronto Star that the rules state that each contestant must be a "naturally born female." He suspected that Jenna Talackova, a Vancouver native, was not born female, which she later confirmed.

“She feels like a real girl and she is a real girl. She didn’t expect people to question it,” Davila said. “She was hoping we could put her back in the competition, but the rules are very clear and there’s no way we can go back on it.”

Here's a little more on the story from "Xtra" in Canada:
(When) "The 23-year-old's pictures and profile have been erased from the Miss Universe website. Jenna has told CTV that she won't be speaking about her disqualification until she has conferred with a lawyer, but went to her Twitter to say she had been kicked out of the competition over "discrimination" and that she is "not giving up".
A real Miss Universe has nothing to do with who someone was when they were born, and everything to do with who they've grown up to be. A real Miss Universe is someone who has worked hard to overcome adversity and achieve her dreams. It's a shame the competition doesn't recognize that, and insists on putting so much emphasis on physicality, instead of focusing on what's on the inside -- which is what makes a "real" woman, and which one would hope, is what makes a woman worthy of being called Miss Universe."

I have posted a couple pictures of "Jenna" here on the blog and she is worthy of the pageant.
My opinion is this pageant is just another line in the sand drawn by society against transgender or transsexual  women or men. Not unlike the restroom issue!

So! How's that Workin' for ya Trans Girl?

I received a question the other day about the changes in gender perception I have experienced in the world.
First off my cynic bitch self said what the hell kind of  question is that? DUH! Everything changes when you cross the gender line!
After I sent the bitch to her room without her "android" I started to think the question was a good one.
Certainly the stimuli men and women encounter in the world as they go about their everyday lives is as different as night and day. I am not going to sit here and bore both of us with the age old stories about losing "IQ" and losing male priviledge. True but not worth beating into the ground again.
My situation may be different than some in that my new circle of friends never knew the old ( male) me. Their decisions to embrace me as a friend came from knowing me as a trans woman.
Early in the process this caused me great stress.  I was trying all so hard to be a woman.
As time passed and I relaxed, the most amazing thing happened. I became me. The girl inside just appeared and took over. The hair, clothes and makeup just became part of the total person.
So, a very simple answer to the perception question is sure, there are huge changes but mine were all inside.
I just felt so natural. The new perceptions were like coming home.
The public may still not view me as a genetic woman but they are more and more viewing me more than a "man in a dress".
As it turned out, the question was a good one. The answer leads me to believe (in my case at least) it was destiny or some long hidden DNA that took me to this point in my life!
What a ride!!!!

Quote of the Day

"It's not what you are thinking...but it could be!"

Cyrsti Hart

Transgendered Questions with No Answers

This is just a bit of an addition to my recent "Mirror" post.
The trans woman I quoted and I had also been chatting back and forth about the difficulty in locating a true trans girlfriend. I feel her ideas are relevant enough to pass along.
For clarification I'm talking about a friend to share life experiences with. A person to hang out with and do girl things with.  As it turns out, the person who fills that void in my life now is a genetic woman but I certainly wasn't always that lucky
I am not talking about the huge group who want sex or for me to "dress them up". That's not being a friend.
Here is her question:

"I would love to have a trans woman girlfriend to do things with together.  Women click together, the gay community clicks together like mad (however loosely), gender queers click together, but in my experience the trans community does not click with anyone (gay, straight, bi, or trans).  It really pisses me off.  I don’t get it.  The only place we can really bond with people is online."

As our "chat" continued, I essentially told her how weary I was of endless discussion and no progress. Except for my theory that many in the transsexual culture went to the "promised land" of no return and the grass wasn't so green. They simply missed the feminine essence except for appearance.
 Her reply:

"(I) agree that the feminine essence is neglected.  To me a lot of what feminine means is thinking and caring about others.  It is totally missing in my experience.  I find trans women seem so isolated and disconnected. I don't get it.  That is why I have been going to a gender queer group instead.  I am getting more of what I am looking for and I guess a little less of other things.
I can understand your disappointment.  It would be so nice to have a real life common girlie bond with a like minded trans woman."

I'm weary of the whole deal but still would love to hear from those of you who have had success establishing a girl friend with transgendered experience.
Obviously, I'm just one voice in the wilderness. My experience is just one.
I just don't have any quick answers to any of these questions and I hope my experience does not reflect the attitude of the overall transgender community!
Unfortunately I'm judging our culture guilty until proven innocent.

New Quote of the Day!

"Intelligence is in the mind of the beholder."
Cyrsti