By The Numbers

If there was ever a survey I didn't want to see Ohio show up towards the top in, it's the one I saw on Femulate from Twitter:










Or:


Thanks Stana!!!

Who Put the "S" in Stealth?

I remember 'back in the day' when stealth was a dirty word among some(including me). Somehow it just seemed like those transgender or transsexual individuals who were blessed with the looks or the money, to jump the gender fence and ...disappear. Then, the more I discovered the trans community, I could understand why.

It seemed those who stayed close enough to shine a light on the process also weren't the most pleasant peeps in the world.

So now, I often wonder who put the 'S' in my increasing degree of stealth. I can say no one "ran me out" and I will (in the foreseeable future) continue my writings on the state of being a transgender woman will continue.

In the meantime, I also am not going into any public places where I am not noticed and scream "Hey! I'm trans."


Guilt somehow enters into all of this. The Goddess has blessed me with all my acquaintances who for the most part are non LGBT peeps and my partner for a reason to be named later.

If you ever hear it from me, assume I have passed to the other side and since I am not Houdini I am not coming back. 

All of this sounds like a topic for my therapist and I to talk about at my next Veterans Administration visit.

Speaking of the VA, I was in the Social Services office the other day asking for info they provide on setting up a living will etc. I was standing at the desk when a genuine transgender veteran woman comes out of one of the offices. Wow!

I said "hello" but didn't have a chance to talk. I will in the future.

The Good News or the Bad News

When someone asks me that I say "Give me the bad first, the good will feel better!" 

Sort of like yesterday, I received my new checks to use, but now I have to use them.

Then today as I showed up for my blood letting (Phlebotomy), as I was checking in, the only two guys in the waiting room asked was it "a boy or girl." I tensed up and whirled around ready to go to war with them until it turned out they were talking about a story on CBS This Morning called "Raising Ryland. About an eight year old transgender boy.

Ryland and Mom

The good news happened to be both of them seemingly did not have a negative attitude about it. They were just amazed he used be "a girl" at all (their words.)

Time Flies When...

It's difficult to believe it has been since Sunday since I have had a chance to post to Cyrsti's Condo but it has, so let's play a bit of "catch up and mustard."

Yesterday was the primary voting day here in Ohio and I ended up with two positives. I could cross party lines (Republicans or Democrats) and yesterday was my very first vote as Jessie. A big moment. Or should I say my first time not voting as that mean old person I used to be.

Unidentified Ohio Voter 

Also yesterday, I was fitted for my first pair of feminine glasses. 

Be careful...very soon I will be able to see YOU!

Cyrsti's 's Condo Sunday Edition

Ker Plunk! Listen up! Another virtual edition of the "Condo" is hitting your front porch! The weather here in Cincinnati is a "balmy" 70 something with a light rain. A great day so far just to curl up in your jammies' with a cup o joe and enjoy the start to your Sunday!
Page One-The Week that Was - or Wasn't: Last week Caitlyn Jenner rejoined the fray where she left it, behind the eight ball. Very simply she stuck her chin out and stubbornly explained why she still insisted on supporting political candidates dead set against LGBTQ rights. On the local scene, I found out I needed to be scheduled for another colonoscopy. Regardless of the indignity of the procedure, the possible options are worse (colon cancer.) Plus, I look at it this way, this is the beginning of my "pretty,pretty princess" phase going full circle. "The Princess" is what my deceased wife called me when she was telling me I wasn't man enough to be a woman. It took a while to prove her wrong.
Page Two

 Yesterday's Coffee-Opinion-See How Easy that Was? Last night, Liz and I met a relatively new friend for a late lite dinner. Along the way the conversation changed from on line dating sites (Liz and I met on one four plus years ago) to pictures for it to my second book. Liz has access to some of my older "photo shopped" pix and showed one to our friend, who kind of gasped. (Positively I hope :)) I did jump in quickly to explain to her how I managed a picture like that years ago. First of all, the hair was a wig and the picture was taken at an angle in a mirror on my cell phone. Finally, I blurred it a bit more before going public with it. So there you go, I'm clean and what you see now is what anyone gets.

Page Three-Hormonal Update: Yesterday was a big day of sorts in that my estrogen patches were actually "re-upped" and I received my next three month supply through the mail. Since I have been back on them, my precious hair is coming back as well as other bodily changes such as sore breasts. Also "coming back" is my gray hair in time for spring/summer coloring. I am truly dangerous since I can do it myself! I'm thinking about going back to a lighter shade of red to reflect the "Celtic" past some say I have.

Page Four-The Back Page: Time to go! The dogs feel like they need a walk and together they are a "force!" Thanks for taking time to stop by Cyrsti's Condo, Love you All!!!

Caitlyn STOP! Please

I operate on a couple levels of existence, my own which includes loved ones of course, and another which includes reading/discussing the current happenings/future of the transgender family.

The only change I can hope to help with is on Cyrsti's Condo.

 Now, let's face it, most people are having more and more problems with a real ugly election campaign. I'm so disgusted after the Chicago violence recently I don't know what to write to those of you who read the blog outside the United States.  I really didn't think I would see what was really a civilian race riot in my life-but I did.

Then let's toss good old Caitlyn Jenner into the political fray supporting candidates that hate the LGBT community..REALLY????

I've ranted on and on about Jenner enough that I am just too emotional (damn HRT) so I'm going to pass along a link from the Huffington Post which says it better!

What's in a Name?

Yesterday I went to the bank I have literally been with since my youth (my Dad worked there). 

As mergers and acquisitions would have it, when I moved to the Cincinnati area, I discovered one of the banks new branches less than a mile away.

I was going to tie up loose ends in my gender marker journey and getting my new name put on my accounts. It went well after the poor teller figured out I didn't have any changes to my social security number (goddess forbid.)

On the way home and after I thought a bit more about my upcoming colonoscopy and the future "indignities" of it, I began to consider the benefits of choosing an androgynous name.

Regardless of my name, all my gender markers now read "female" but of course I still have all my male "bits" and probably a full "c" in the breast department, Oh yes, let's not forget my hair which is starting to feel the effects of my return engagement with estrogen, and starting to grow again.

Being health professionals, I am sure I will be treated with respect but I'm betting I will provide more than a little conversation after the procedure.

Then again, does it all have to be all about me?

Turn It Over Girl.

During my Doc's visit yesterday, he mentioned it was time to schedule yet another fun filled event called a "colonoscopy."

If you are not familiar, the "event" is basically a two day deal. One is to clean you out...the other to take a peak at what is going on with your intestines. Now, rest assured this is my third time through this, so I am a relative expert.

The stories are worse than the actual "c-scope." Plus, nothing could be as bad as colon cancer.

My problem is vanity, pure and simple. I am not looking forward to wearing a hospital gown which opens in the back to the world to do this. Hair removal in certain key areas will be interesting if not painful,

Also, I see this as the first in a future of showing my "sexy" transgender body to a set of peeps I would rather not see it.

Old age.

The Three "F's"

You probably of heard of of "fight or flight" and I have simply added fear for my other "F." So, fear, fight or flight. 

The reason I bring it up is today when I was out and about running errands - as a woman of course and sure I felt a little uncertainty about where and when and if's of where I was going.

I thought what the hell, why was I still feeling this way and it occurred to me I always might. Unless some miracle happens I expect to never be a totally beautiful feminine critter but I do expect (and do) own what I am, The only thing I can say is I am getting better and better at adjusting to and becoming the person I was always destined to be,

In fact, I ran into a couple peeps who I hadn't seen in quite awhile. They went out of their way to say how different I acted. I was just calmer some how.

Homecoming I guess. Now If I can escape the"Three F's" with another letter of the alphabet. Happy.