Monday, September 28, 2015

What Would YOU Do?

Carmen Carrera
Have you ever seen the ABC Television Show "What Would You Do?"  basically, the show features the public in sensitive (potentially really controversial situations.) In fact, years ago, Carmen Carrera was featured as a transgender server working the counter in a diner. All of the sudden one of the counter customers recognized her from her high school days as a boy and started loudly to go nuts to her. Of course, he was an actor and it was nice to see how many of the other patrons came to her aid.


Actually though, none of that has much to do with this post.this- except this also revolves around the true experience of a transgender server.

Now,  I know many of you follow Stana and her "gold standard" Femulate Blog and I found her daily post today to be quite interesting and thought provoking. Cutting to the chase, she (Stana) did not agree with the parent in Minnesota who came up and asked a transgender server to explain her "gender status" to his young daughter. Her , Stana's point was (I paraphrase) - it's none of your business. Get out of my life. 

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My point is, in my "neck of the woods" I don't trust the greatest majority of parents to have any knowledge at all of what a trans person is. I would rather try to explain myself. But-

Having said that, my daughter would agree totally with Stana. Let her (my daughter) do her own parenting.

Either way, it is yet another highly thought provoking topic you can comment on here, or on Femulate. (Follow the link.)

By the way, Stana's book "Fantasia Fair Dairies" is out now! Available on Amazon.

Just a Cross Dresser?

I love it when I am running behind and Connie steps up (on her walker) with a comment which serves as an entire post for me. Basically, it comes from a recent Cyrsti's Condo post I wrote on "tipping" the gender scale from cross dresser to transgender. An answer which often is not easily answered and on occasion is - with passion:

Funny you should use the word 'experience'. I think that when we go about living our daily lives without the forethought of each event being an experience, we then get to that point where we have tipped the scale. This doesn't mean that we've fallen into a hum-drum existence, necessarily, but the difference is in our mindset. For those of us who started our journeys by cross dressing, it was all about the experience - whether closeted or "out". I know cross dressers who still, after decades, are looking forward to their next 'experience'. For me, as exciting as it was to do things (in attempting to validate myself), I soon grew tired of what I had come to realize was merely a game I was playing. I had been using extraordinary means in order to find an extraordinary experience (of trans womanhood). As I began to just live my life without expectation of experience, I found that the ordinary was more comforting and validating than the experiences I had "set up" for myself before. Thus, I I find the extraordinary by ordinary means."

Thanks Connie!

Sunday, September 27, 2015

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

Sharla and Cynthia. Photo: Brigitte Lacombe

Ker Plunk! Another virtual edition is hitting your front porch! All in all, another glorious day here in Southwestern Ohio and time for a hot "cup o joe!" Let's get started.

Page One: The Week That Was-or Wasn't: On the very pinnacle of transgender news and opinion, everything seemed to settle down a bit since we didn't have anything new from Caitlin Jenner to kick around. (Didn't really care she got her gender markers changed.)

 Over in the UK though, a new television series is featuring a transgender woman character (played by a trans woman, Rebecca Root.) had a successful debut.

From The GuardianLast month, BBC2 launched a new sitcom that’s looking quietly revolutionary. Boy Meets Girl centres on the awkward love affair between early twenty something Leo (Harry Hepple) and Judy (Rebecca Root), a trans woman who is pushing 40. And it’s already shaping up to be the breakout comedy of the year.

Page Two Opinion: One way or another, age washes away memories, good and bad. Plus, too many of the gender transitioning experiences we see today seemingly want to only center on the transgender person and (if married) not the spouse. I ran across one such article from the "New York Magazine" and I thought I should share. But, first of all, my thoughts: 

  1. 1  Any Gender transition is extremely selfish. After all you are shedding years of guilt from hiding your true self.But, your spouse (or girlfriend) is all of the sudden left holding the relationship bag.
  2. Betrayal and Trust issues. Often the fact your loved one feels worse about this than the knowledge of your gender issues themselves
  3. Going through puberty is not fun. Think about when you begged a spouse to help with clothes and/or make up. Or, worse yet, did it on your own. 


  1. ..
I could go on and on with these and each of us who has gone through the painful process of transitioning with a spouse- has your own story. If you don't remember, my wife of 25 years was OK  with me cross dressing but going down the HRT route was a total no-no. She took the easy way outt and passed on nearly eight years ago. Others I know are able to enter into a "marriage of convenience." .Follow the link above for more.
Page Three- The Back Page: Times up kids! Big day ahead. My Bengals are overdue to turnover and get their kitty bellies rubbed by the Ravens in a couple hours and tonight I'm heading to a full moon ritual. Interestingly, it is the brightest in 32 years-if the clouds stay away.
In the meantime, I hope all of you don't stay away from Cyrsti's Condo. Luv ya!!!


Saturday, September 26, 2015

The Deepest Cut of All



How many of us haven't suffered through the "that's a man!" slur? In fact, I rank it up there with the "earning the right to be a woman" process. 

As transgender women or cross dressers in world, we are experts in how out and out rude people can be - and not just with us. If you have ever seen the show "My Giant Life", the show features several women- all over 6'6" tall. The camera's follow them around and document all the rude peeps going nuts staring, whispering and even asking for selfies.

My latest "skirmish" came a couple weeks ago at a local movie theater when a couple pre teen boys looked at me around a corner and ran away laughing. I couldn't blame them as much as their parents.

Then, I read this story from Scotland:  A trans woman was left in tears after visiting a branch of "Specsavers" when a group of workers began laughing at her. Jess, on the left above began her full time transition nearly 10 months was with her wife, who called them on it.

The good ending to this ugly experience came when Jess posted her experience with the company to Twitter and got an apology and a pledge to diversify and sensitize it's employee's.



I will always wonder though how people can be so damn rude-and oh yes-here is your link.








Out in the UK

Natasha was apprehensive about competing, but eventually entered because the event is not based on looks
From the Independent:
This weekend, dozens of women will compete for the Miss Transgender UK crown.
For the first time on Sunday, London will host Miss Transgender UK, a pageant for transgender women. The competition, which will take place at EGG Nightclub in north London, is the brainchild of Rachael Bailey, a head chef and hospitality supervisor in Cardiff.
“Isn’t it about time we were noticed and accepted?” she wrote on the event website. “It’s up to us to show the UK that we’re here. We work, live and function as part of society, and as women together we will bring the UK in line with Europe for acceptance and equality for all…We need to see an end to living a life crushed by stealth."
Follow the link above for more.

At the Gender Crossroads

  Image from Timelord on UnSplash Many times, in my life, I have found myself at a gender crossroads. Of course, like most of you, I learn...