"T" Dar?

Pat was kind enough to send in this comment:


I maintain that it is important that as many of us get out and be seen and mingle with the civilian population as possible. At my height and weight and with my decidedly male features I do not fool myself into thinking that I pass. When I do go out I do my best to look my best but I am pretty much the same person regardless of how I am dressed. Every time I encounter someone with an open mind they may learn a little bit about me as a T person, trans folk, CD, guy in a dress, TG, etc. Whether I am dressed as a man or woman I like to think that people do not find me boring. I will engage on any subject and I do make a conscious effort to keep my filter on low.

For now my wife does not like the concept of my being out in a dress and she lives in fear that others will discover my dressing BUT being married to me her T-Dar is higher than other people's and she often will spot other Trans folks. There is one in the next town known as the town tranny. He shows up at parades and festivals. My wife has often discussed this person with her hair dresser who is married to a local cop in that town. This trans person is well like and fully tolerated and sometimes serves as a volunteer assistant for the local PD. My wife and I have both encountered this Trans person and we both think that I present as a more believable and better looking woman. The difference is that this person is out and about all the time and I am not. If I do get to talk with her some day I do need to tell her to try to tone down her safety vest orange or super hot pink nail polish on her fingers and toes. 

There is another T-person who I have never seen but who my wife seems to encounter once or twice a year in the supermarket. She tells me that he is taller than I am in his flats and that his makeup and hair are poorly done but he simply presents as a large guy in a skirt and blouse just going about the mundane task of food shopping.

We are moving forward and need to recognize the baby steps that we take every day as helping pave the way.
Pat

Thanks for the comment Pat!  I believe I may of heard about the person you are referring to and I have a tendency to believe you may have more trans tendencies than the town (Gender Slur). The reason being, you have more insight into the process other than presenting as a caricature of a woman (drag queen).  We all know drag queens are like the old comics in drag and the public knows of their true gender so all is well. Ha ha! Joe thinks it's Halloween year around!

Maybe the person in the market simply "takes for granted" he is what he is in a dress and that's fine but we all know what a little tender loving care can do for one's appearance.  A whole other topic.

Your wife is so much like mine was "back in the day" and we did have a good time with our "T-Dar". Today though, T-Dar could mean transvestite or transgender-a huge difference.  My wife could and did accept it in others but drew the line with me.

Burger Heaven

This post is fun for a couple of different reasons-food and public reactions.

Following the main day Saturday of workshops at the Trans Ohio Symposium, it was time for Liz and I to head on back to our hotel room, take a break and head out for a night on the town in Columbus.

The picture on the left is taken at The Ohio State Student Union with the Buckeye Mascot, Brutus Buckeye.  Of interest to me is how I could tell the effect of HRT is affecting my legs-adding a rounded feminine outer layer of fatty tissue under the skin-  extending up through my hips and rear.

To make sure I didn't slide backwards, I made plans to take Liz to one of the best "burger joints" in the country that night- Thurman's in Columbus, Ohio. Thurman's has been in business since 1942 and does have tremendous hamburgers!  The only problem I ran into was I had to eat them far more femininely (with a fork) than I ever did before.

The really cool part of the visit was how I was received. Past history has told me I should be prepared for any reception from a very chilly one, to at the least a nice one from the staff and the usual rude stares from other customers.  As I have said, Columbus is a very diverse city and Thurman's sits very close to German Village which is known to have a strong gay influence- but- as we know, "gay ain't trans." .  Not only were we made to feel welcome, I felt embraced. It was like Wow! they were honored there was a real live transgender woman there. Really?  The experience was positively wonderful! Also, being in Columbus as compared to Cincinnati, fewer other guests suffered neck injuries straining to look at me. (Sorry "Nati" I love ya' but it's true.)

Finally, as several of you party peeps know here in Cyrsti's Condo, certain foods (such as a great big burger) will set you up for success during an evening of drinking.  Our next stop was to do just that at a place called Club Diversity which I have mentioned here before. The name says it all.  "Diversity" is actually in an old Victorian mansion just south of downtown and is actually part owned by a transgender woman.  If I had to guess, the majority of the clientele is of the gay male type but you can expect a nice mellow mixture of others.  Except when a group of cross dressers who meet there monthly got kicked out for awhile. (Imagine that!)

Fortunately, I live very close to Columbus and have plans to attend TGLBQ Pride with Liz in a couple of months! So a trip back is coming up soon.

Hate

Of course, as soon as I begin to celebrate the diversity and acceptance of the weekend, as it always does, a touch of reality comes through.

This morning, I simply through on a pair of guy jeans, t-shirt and tennis shoes to do two errands before the day headed any further into the forecasted heat and humidity.  Pretty much what you saw in my last two pictures is what you get from me now anyway. Plus, an increasingly well defined set of women's breasts.

The only difference is how I do my hair, foundation, eye shadow and lip gloss in full girl mode.  I should say "what's left" of my foundation after humidity. I do think what is then left of my foundation sort of works it way into my face and around any beard growth- so all is good.  So, I'm lucky HRT is working it's skin wonders on my hair and skin or not so lucky as I felt this morning.

I stopped to pickup an iced coffee and gas.  As I was pumping my gas, I had this deep quick feeling something was wrong.  I looked up and saw this pin head-skin headed red neck literally hanging out the back of a tree service truck glaring at me.  I mean really glaring at me to the point I was scared.  At that point I did the only things I could, like pumping the rest of my gas-making a big deal out of my dog and getting the hell out of there.

I didn't take long to feel again how the "other half" lives.