Such A Geek!

OK, you can make fun of me now. I'm such a geek.
This morning it was cold in my house and I was wearing a cozy fleece top I had to change. The change included my bra.
Instead of going topless in a cold house...it was time to conquer another female mystery. It was time to take off my bra without removing my shirt. 
During my adolescent years, just getting the bra off a girl was a superhuman experience.  First of all, she had to agree to the move and then I had to negotiate the fasteners on the back. Keep in mind, this was after I had bras of my own!
Topping that though, was the absolute magical experience when a girl would take off her bra without removing her shirt! How did that work?
Until this morning, I had no idea.  Now, as I found how easy a task it is, I feel so naive and maybe a little sad.
The whole maneuver  has joined the women's rest room as another mystery solved. Yes genetic females have many intangibles but restrooms and bra removals are not the top of the list.
Now, I feel a little sad, a little satisfied and a little geekish. After all, sometimes it nice to still have a mystery or two!

Transition/Transition

Certainly we have followed similar paths to where we are today. More than likely, the young trans girl today faces many of the same obstacles as  many of us did years ago. The only true difference is the influence of the Internet. Certainly the younger girl today does not feel the isolation of her older sisters.  That in itself though doesn't solve all the problems she faces.
"Transition/Transition " is a brief look at the milestones we face as "T-girls".
Number one is the discovery we have a special attraction for the other gender. A real attraction, we want to be them. Closely following this discovery comes confusion, frustration and denial.
Number two is the action mode. In this mode, the overwhelming desire to act on the discovery results in borrowing Mom's or sisters clothes. The majority of the time this is of a sexual nature. Sexual or not, the compulsion to become the alternate gender is powerful.
Number three is getting in that closet and slamming the door.  No one needs to know of your weakness! It will go away.
Number four is forcing the demons out of your life. Surely if you are the most macho guy or the best athlete, you can forget this ever happened.
Number five is failure.  All the years of trying to be the "alpha" male has gotten you absolutely nowhere.  Many times you have now gained a wife and family who you feel would never understand. Many feel you have deceived them. This reaction could be unfair.  You didn't know the "depth" of your feelings and you were doing the "male" thing by fighting them.
Number six is desperation. The sneaking starts. You could be contacting transgirls on the web,  going on "business" trips as a girl or any number of other activities but all of it still is just a cover up of the real problem.
Number seven is fixing the problem. This could be as severe as suicide or as drastic as going all the way and living as a girl. Something had to give.
Number eight is the future. Hopefully you didn't try to harm yourself and you accepted yourself as a female.
This all has been a very simplistic look at the factors we face as trans.
In my case I wish the crystal ball had been a little clearer.  I would have listened a little closer to that first person that told me I made a better girl.

Copasetic?

What the heck is that? Sounds like some sort of medicine my Mom used to force down me when I was a kid.
By definition "copacetic"  means all is satisfactory or is fine.
My personality equates that with being in a rut.
What did the famous philosopher Randy "Macho Man" Savage say? If you are not living on the edge, you are taking up too much space?
When I feel too natural as a girl, does it take the edge away?
Yes and no.
"Back in the day", each step out the door was an adventure. The adrenalin was flowing. Would I be be busted or be the fairest of them all?
Over the years much ( if not all ) of that has subsided. The rush is now a warm satisfaction.  Is it good? Sure...but every now and then I miss the good old days!