A Fantastic Trans Woman!

More on the Oscar nominated movie we posted about here in Cyrsti's Condo from Laurel:

"I agree - it is great film and Daniela Vega is impressive in the role. The character she plays shows great forebearance in the face of monumental intolerance. I went to see it twice with different friends from the cisgender community. They say that they came away with a better understanding of the problems faced by the transgender person.

The large general audience sat in silence through the film and cheered just once when Marina finally reacts to the bigotry. Daniela Vega does her own singing and the final scene is hauntingly beautiful.

Do go and see it and take some friends!"

Will do!!! Thanks Laurel :)

Oscar Time?

Daniela Vega, 28, stars in Sebastian Lelio's A Fantastic Woman. She plays Marina, a transgender woman whose partner (Francisco Reyes) dies, after which Marina is subjected to harsh treatment by the family of her deceased lover and by police investing the death.

Chile has selected the film as its Academy Awards submission this year and Variety called her performance "a multi-layered, emotionally polymorphous feat of acting," that deserves "so much more than political praise." While several transgender musicians have been nominated for awards, Vega is the first trans actress to be nominated.

But the bigger spotlight may be on whether Vega's breakout performance — one of stirring strength and compassion — could make Oscar history. 

Busy...Busy...Busy!

In addition to the busy week I have had, the weekend looks just as promising.

Tonight (Friday) we have a circle meetup with the Wiccan group Liz and I are a part of and interesting enough, another transgender woman may attend for the first time. Since we normally only have about ten to twelve people attend, having two trans women there would be special!

Then, tomorrow, we travel the hour or so trip up to Dayton, Ohio for a Pagan Pride festival. We are mainly going to plug our Cincinnati Witches Ball in October and sell a few T-shirts. However, I am supposed to meet my daughter and her friend there, which should be a great time.

It's times like these, I am fortunate to be secure enough in my presentation to not have to worry about it!

Running LGBT Errands

Yesterday was one of those days where it seemed like all I got done was a list of "do's."

Arranged into all my stops was a visit with my therapist, which went predictably as planned. Except,I had this deep down feeling of well being before I went into to meet her.

I guess it was easy, considering never in my wildest dreams, did I ever think I would be able to transition so far in this transgender life I have decided to live. Here I was in a waiting room basically full of women waiting for others with an appointment and no one gave me a side glance. I knew I was doing something right at the VA. (Veterans Administration).

Plus on a higher level, seeing all the vets in wheelchairs (many with limbs missing) made me feel grateful to be in one piece.

Other than that, for some reason, the woman who runs the Starbucks coffee place in the hospital, treated me like it was old home day. Most of the time, she basically takes my order and ignores me, so I don't know what that was all about. She said she hadn't seen me in a while and I could only say I was doing better with all my medical conditions. I didn't say coming to the hospital just to hang out was not my idea of a fun time.

I also had to stop by the attorney's office to make a payment on a bill and tell them I was working on picking up a death certificate. (Which I finally found which county had it.) Both receptionists were more than nice.

Finally, I have to keep telling myself, to most people I run into at least must consider me a respite of sorts from the boring public they deal with.

Which is different and fun!

LGBT Transgender Astronomy

If women are from Venus and men from Mars, where are transgender women and trans men from?
Perhaps we are the "earthlings"? Think of the possibilities and the challenges.

No matter if you put a dress on once a week or you've fully transitioned, we earthlings are a unique tribe. We suffer the same problems as Venus and Mars, and quarrel about them in similar ways. After all, the gravitational pulls of the other two
planets tug on us daily.

We are uniquely flamboyant or conservative in our dress and mannerisms as we struggle on our planet. The problem with our planet is that we have opened "Pandora's Box" and we can't close it. All the different glittering gifts in the box fascinate! Those gifts send us down different paths we don't understand our self.

Imagine what that must be like for the inhabitants of the other two planets? From downright hatred and violence to curiosity and acceptance-we get it all!
What's an "earthling" to do?

We hash and rehash our lives here to each other. In many cases we are all we have to communicate the pain and the joy of our planet. All of this it's helps us to become stronger.

We need to believe in our tribe and embrace it's diversity! We have lived in the other two camps. If in the smallest way you can use that knowledge, you are one of God's chosen creatures. What ever God you believe in.

Communicating with the two other genders is a rare gift. Learning it and using it is the challenge. Accepting the challenge and being successful will make our planet a much better place to live!!!!

A Cyrsti's Condo "archive post!"

It's Nine- Eleven

With all the natural disasters  plaguing our country right now, it is easy to forget many of the unnatural ones such as the "Nine-Eleven" terrorist attack. Here is to remembering the victims of such a brutal attack and their remaining families!

On a brighter side, I wanted to write some original content again and re-continue my archive posts at a later date. They are great to use when I really don't have any thing to write about or any comments to feature.

The older posts also have a tendency to demonstrate what I call "a transgender transition within another Mtf transition." My earlier blog posts have a tendency to feature how  I looked versus how I acted.

 Of course, as I transitioned into full time, much of that had to change. It is hard to explain, but as with any cis woman, you have to look at how you look all the time versus just a couple days a week and the choice of becoming the woman of your dreams. She just may not be your original or fantasy choice, but those ideas may not work for an everyday choice of fashion. At that point, you have to really concentrate on blending with the majority of the cis women around you.

With me though, and what the posts often don't point out, was the sheer joy of my new life as a woman. The clothes just became what they are to any woman-window dressing to the soul.

As I continue with the archive posts from the past, my hope is that the big picture of a transgender transition comes out.

From one LGBT trans girl's viewpoint!

Cyrsti's Condo Archive Post...Don't Answer too Fast!

Way back (about seven years ago) when I was slowly exploring my LGBT transgender roots, several cis women played key roles which they had no inkling of. Here was one:

"During another of one of my evenings out, I encountered yet another communication stumbling block.

I have been slowly building a new friendship with a  worker at one of my regular stops.
She knew, I'm sure- she was dealing with a transgender person. (Probably for the first time ever) I was taking it slow until one of my long time friends who also works there came up and joined in the conversation. She immediately added quite a bit more info about me.

All of that was fine but all of the sudden the conversation took on a whole new dynamic.  She started talk to me as a "trans woman" person for a second and then jumped into a real "girl on girl" discussion. I really had to not anticipate where the question was coming from.

Remember, I was still relatively new to the one on one female conversation as it pertains to real life.  Sure I've been on the outside looking in.  Plenty of the "I love your ear-rings or hair". Now it's more of the in depth talk about guys, family and shopping.

Instead of the usual  questions of why I do what I do. (Understandable) The discussion started that way and then went girl to girl. I was really surprised!

The best part of the whole evening was she knows I'm going out tonight with two of the other female bartenders to a competing pub in an upscale mall.  She is relatively new to the area and asked a few questions about where I go.

It would be great fun to spend some time with her!"

I will have to find the post about when I went out with the two women and pass it along to you.

LGBT "Biker Girl" Revisited

This post is the latest in the series of archive posts I am presenting and one which could have changed my life forever, had I acted on it. Again, at this point of my life I still considered myself a transitioning cross dresser, refusing to accept my true transgender self.

"I had been frequenting a couple of the casual chain bar/restaurants in the area for over ten years. On my first visit, I was so scared I took a seat next to a supporting post around the bar and tried to blend with it! Nothing in my closet that screamed Oak, so that didn't work.

I lived that night and found out the world wasn't trying to destroy me and continued to return. In fact, a couple of the bartenders that have waited on me since the beginning are still there!
I also became pretty good "buds" (no not the beer) with the crew of the companies' other unit. I ended up one night sitting next to one of the bartender's sister. I had heard stories about the exotic "stripper sis" and wasn't sorry!


She was exotic with some well placed tats. Her other job was as a hairdresser and she proceeded to tell me how much she loved tr--nies and gave me some tips on my appearance. She even went as far as inviting me to sister #3's bachelorette party. (another story)

Her husband was always with her. He was a big guy with a classic Triumph bike and the look to go with it. He ran a lumber yard. What a threesome!

The only problem was she loved to trade shots and the extra Jaeger and Tequila was hard to survive!
About three months later, she broke up with her husband. I guess exotic strippers have a hard time with monogamy? One night after the breakup, he came in with about three other friends that I knew..
Regardless of his decision making process with women, the poor guy was heartbroken. I tried to lend some support the best I could and away I went.

A week later, he was in the bar again and came over to sit next to me. Much to my (and the bartender's amazement) he was really interested in talking about things like his bike and music. He was leaning into me ever so slightly and added some light touches. He had to be at work early the next morning, gave me his cell number and left. He never asked for mine.

One of the bigger mistakes I've made is that I never called him. Only saw him once after that and he moved away.

At that point in my life my profile would have read "no men" After my brief encounter with him, I changed that profile. Ever so briefly I connected with a person who shared many of the same interests with me. Ever so quickly, I never tried to see the gentle bear of a guy again.
All of a sudden spending time with a guy wasn't such a bad thought.

I often wondered what that ride on the back of his Triumph would have been like!"

Cross Dressing Melodies?

In a recent post I mentioned being slurred by people playing "Dude Looks Like a Lady" on a jute box and/or by a DJ. As suspected, I am not the only one:

From Connie: "I think just about all of us have had to endure the "Dude Looks Like a Lady" on the jukebox, along with the snickering from the small-minded little boys who think they are so clever to have thought of such a funny thing to do. I occasionally go to a karaoke night at a nearby place, cuz I love to sing, but gigs with a live band are sometimes few and far between. I get requests from others to sing with them on the stage most every time I go, and I'm usually happy to help people who may need a little encouragement. One night, though, a guy tried to kind of gaslight me. I walked directly off the stage when I recognized the intro to "Lola". The worst part of it, to me, was not that he had set it up, but that he had set it up with the karaoke hostess ahead of time. I had thought her to be a friend, and, even though I believed her when she said later that the connection never occurred to her, I couldn't really understand how it didn't. 

Another of the hard lessons we learn in transitioning is that, although there will always be the insensitive jerks in this world, we can't always assume that our friends and allies are as sensitive to our situation as we are, ourselves. It's best to grow a thicker skin even before we might grow bigger breasts"

Thanks Connie! I had forgotten about the "Kinks, Lola" although it is a classic tune. However, I have never been slurred by arse holes playing it. Probably, because they are younger and don't remember it!

Even though "Dude" is not supposed to be about a cross dresser or transgender woman, people when it was released chose to make it derogatory slur against us.

Hopefully soon it too will fade with time.