Zoey Tur -The Doc and More

Connie called me to task concerning a recent post I wrote here in Cyrsti's Condo concerning two individuals who I think at the least are out to make a "living" of sorts from the transgender community. One is Dr. Drew-the other Zoey Tur (a self professed trans woman). From Connie:

"I don't watch Dr. Drew; I just read about this incident. Is Dr. Drew really transphobic? Obviously, Ben Shapiro is. However, I'm going to take you to task again, because we transgender people should not also be passing judgement on each other. (she)? You recently posted that there is no one right way to transition - but does that mean there are wrong ways? I would agree that Zoey is somewhat an embarrassment, based on what I have seen of her, and she certainly is taking a different path of transition than I.

 However, if I am living in the hope that I will be received by the world in a civil manner for my gender identity, I must also do the same for anyone else's. After all, if we transgender people know that our gender identities are not a matter of choice, then we should respect that - even if a person demonstrates what we have determined to be subsequent acts that are based on choice. So, you might say, "Zoey Tur - she is an asshole", but the "she" should not be "(she)". The "asshole" could even be capitalized, however."

Connie, there are probably only one person who knows for sure if he is transphobic and that is Dr. Drew himself-or is he simply another talking head asking questions for ratings. As far as Zoey Tur goes, I believe you all should know by now what I think about Zoey (less than zero) and I will direct you to a show between the Doc and Zoey here. Ben Shapiro is not really worth my words or energy.

Finally, as far as calling Tur a "she" I thought about not doing it but went ahead. After all, there are plenty of generic's I meet who don't deserve the pronoun.

Cyrsti's Condo at the "Movin' Picture Show!"

One way to beat the "heat" during a hot humid sultry Ohio day?
Spend it at the "movin' picture show!" 

We actually watched the classic Billy Wilder Film Noir Double Indemnity vintage film re-released by TCM for the big screen!  

Cyrsti's Condo- "From the Hart"

Cyrsti's Condo "Sunday Edition"

KerPlunk! Another Sunday Edition has hit your virtual front porch. This week, we are locked into 90 degree plus temperatures and humidity levels which make the heat feel into the 100's. Vintage Ohio. Our "Joe" (coffee) this morning is going to be iced.  Let's get started!

Page One-The Week that was-or Wasn't: On different ends of the transgender spectrum last week, "senior citizen" Caitlin Jenner won an ESPY Sports Courage Award and 14 year old teen trans girl Jazz Jenning's first "reality family show" debuted. Of course Jenner is (and will be) a lightning rod for anything transgender. And, even though I was conflicted about Jenner being chosen for the award-I thought she did a wonderful job of speaking to the tragic problem of teen transgender suicide. More than a few people continue to think no matter what, just throw religion at the trans (problem) and it will go away. With tragic consequences.


Page Two- "Jazzin it Up": Trans teen Jazz Jennings show was a delight. Of course, Jazz is no stranger to the spotlight. At the age of seven Jazz began to tell her story to the world-by choice. Seven years later she presents a unique look at a journey most of us could only dream of. Yet in the middle of Jazz's story comes another-just as compelling: what is a trans teen to do when dealing with boys who are struggling to come to grips with life as a man? Connie comments on Page Three.

Page Three- Shakin Your What? During episode one, Jazz compared her "problems" with boys compared to other girls. I paraphrase, but she said "all they had to do was stick their butts out and the boys would follow." Her point is not lost on any of us of any age. After all, the debate has raged for years on how a cis man who is attracted to a transgender woman be labeled. Gay, Bi or whatever. Still a debate for another time. In the meantime Connie commented:

"Socially, we've advanced to a point where women are recognized for their capabilities beyond house-wivery and the beck and call to their husband's sexual desires. Not that those things are any less important, as the expectation of them has never disappeared - at least they haven't, from most men's points of view. Transgender women cannot compete, as we're having to play a different game on a different play field. Even after taking advantage of all medical science has to offer, we may be able to attract a man, but our past will put the kibosh on most men's game.Transgender women who move into transition are making the move toward sexism, and the short end of it at that. 

Even after fighting the negativity of those who quote bible verses and amateur geneticists (funny, how this is the one thing upon which the two agree), a transgender woman who sticks her butt out must realize that she is, at the same time, sticking her neck out."

I love the last sentence!

Page Four-The Back Page: Well kids, time to wrap up this issue and move out into the tropics! As always, I love you all and wish you all peace love and happiness!!!!

Down the Rabbit Hole?

It's been fairly obvious to most of you visitors to Cyrsti's Condo during my life I have spent some time rummaging around in the "crawzy wabbit" hole.

Most assume automatically it's been because I am transgender and have been on this epic journey seeking my "genderality." Of course much of that is true but there is so much more.

The Goddess has blessed me with a daughter, three grand kids and yet another cis woman who loves me  All of which I have never been sure I deserved. Still, there is so much more I have never ever been able to reach out and understand.

One hundred twenty five years ago when I was serving out the rest of my Army time in Germany, a couple friends and I began to explore meditation lessons. I actually became so involved I actually scared myself off. To this day though, I still use what I learned to clam myself down and de-stress.

That's all good, but yesterday at Liz and I's "Meetup" group,one of the women in the group presented an idea for a group of us to attend a group of "self awareness" sessions. I was wary until she said you could go down your own rabbit hole to the point of coming out the other side. If we had the courage or need to.

We talked later about the sessions and I expressed some of my reservations about the sessions. She assumed I was referring to being transgender. Of course I wasn't. But then I began to think , it's a good idea.

You see, "back in the day" I was deeply trying to deny my gender dysphoria and maybe somehow my fears were tied in with what I was inevitable. Now of course, I am way past all of that. 

So maybe I can release more of my demons-at the least . Never let the "wabbit's" hear you scream, at least- in our own hole. 

Earth Girls Have it Easy???

Used to think years ago girls/women did have it easier than men. After all, back in the day, how hard did June Cleaver really have it on Leave it to Beaver? Except making sure she was looking her best as she served the evening dinner?

Of course as I grew up and learned more about the meaning of "family values"-what were June's wifely duties for husband Ward after the show was over? Of course as the conservative social peeps preach, it was a simpler time. After all, gays were in the closet, men in dresses (transvestites) could be arrested on site and so what if the girl's phys ed teacher acted a "little" masculine?  And, what the hell was a transgender person???

In my case, the more I transitioned into the feminine world, I found out how earth girls had it less easy than earth boys. On the rare occasion a guy did move into my social radar, found that compared to women, I experienced far more problems. I am sure passing privilege had something to do with that, but that is another blog post.

Where I am going with this one is the comment Jazz Jennings made about her teen-aged interactions with male and female class mates. I paraphrase but she said something to the point that her female classmates just had to stick their behinds out to get attention but with her, it was much more difficult with the boys. As you can imagine.

So no, "earth girls" don't have it easy and "earth trans girls" have a much harder time yet!

We can only hope the June Cleaver's of today aren't stopping on their way home from their job picking up "Jesus's Own Chicken" from Chik-fil-et and choosing a much more LGBT friendly chain! 

Cyrsti's Condo "Quote of the Day"

Nine Lives Lost-So Far

Casper Taub

The grim reality is the trans suicides keep mounting. Not long ago in April A bullied 15-year-old transgender skater from West Bloomfield, Michigan died from suicide.

Casper Taub's death was brought to national attention Wednesday (15 July) night in Caitlyn Jenner’s powerful speech at the ESPY Awards.

Taub, who was also known as Sam, skated under the number 57 and his teammates in the Darlings of Destruction Junior Derby League remember him as ‘a bright and shining star’ whose ‘sense of humor was fantastic.’

He is the ninth transgender teen to die by suicide this year.

Jenner spoke about transgender suicide in her emotional ESPYs speech and paid tribute to Taub and 17-year-old Mercedes Williamson – a transgender woman of color was found stabbed to death in a field in Mississippi.

‘I also want to tell you about Sam Taub, a 15-year-old transgender young man from Bloomfield, Michigan,’ Jenner said.

‘In early April, Sam took his own life. Now, Sam’s story haunts me in particular because his death came just a few days before ABC aired my interview with Diane Sawyer.'

It's easy for me to place the tragic blame on conservative families, religious bigots and poorly supervised schools- but then again maybe I am right. 

Comedy and the Trans Girl

Recently I have been meeting my friend Kim for our Wednesday night "play nights." Rarely are they boring and the venue where we have been going for years has been experimenting with different ways of building business. The newest is yet another version of the well worn out Ladies Night drink specials along with different forms of so called entertainment. I figured it was far past time to enjoy my taste of Ladies Drink Specials!

One of the bigger surprises was when we found ourselves front and center on "Comedy Night." Our expectations were low - not expecting to see the next Jerry Seinfeld or Amy Shumer that night but, actually a couple of the guys were entertaining. (Or it could have been the 'dolla' pints?) Whatever the case, one of the comics began to zero in on the two sets of ladies in the half empty bar. I was half of one of the sets. Initially, I was a little embarrassed and warmed up to the attention.  Why not?

After the show, the comic came over to us and said "would you ladies be interested in attending his bigger show in August? If we were, he had free tickets for us." We took the tickets, again-of course.

Of course I had a great time all night. What I never (or not yet) grasped all the factors of why I have completely wonderful periods of time living my chosen gender-or others which are disasters. Obviously material for many blog posts.

One thing I do know is, I have to work very hard for any passing privilege I achieve. When I don't keep my hair up, my make up right or my weight down-I am just beginning to look for problems.

In the meantime, the times when my gender stars come together are unbelievably natural and uplifting-no joke!!!